Midnight Pals: The Beast Compound (Patreon)

James Patterson: hi i'm james pattersonPatterson: you might remember me from such book as 'Dial D for Danger' and 'In the Realm of the Electric Medusas'Patterson: today I've got an even more exciting story for youPatterson: i'm teaming up with Mr BeastKing:Poe:Barker:Koontz:Lovecraft:

King: Mr Beast the guy who makes those deadly youtube prank challenges?Barker: how do you know about mr beast steveKing: oh i think joe mentioned him King: you know how kids areKing: they love their deadly youtube prank challenges

Patterson: yeah i met with mr beast and i thought wow this kid really has some incredible ideas for a book, i think we should collaboratePatterson: i think a collaboration would be a mutually rewarding and artistically invigorating experienceKing:Poe:Koontz:Barker:Lovecraft:Patterson: he also gave me this big bag of moneyPoe: oh! wellPoe: now it all makes senseKing: yeah that makes sense

King: are you sure it's safe to go to the mr beast compound?King: they say that writers go in, but they don't come outPatterson: not to worryPatterson: the authorities are under orders to come looking for me if i go 20 minutes without releasing a new book

[at the Beast compound]Patterson: mr beast? sir? it's mePatterson: james pattersonPatterson: you might remember me from such books as 'Escape of the Giant Scientist' and 'Operation: Negative!'Patterson: remember we were going to collaborate on a book about people forced to endure a gauntlet of deadly challenges?

Mr. Beast: [speaking through jigsaw puppet on a tricycle] so mr pattersonPatterson: what's going on?Mr Beast: to escape my dungeon keep, you must solve my riddles threeMr Beast: before the timer reaches zeroMr Beast: and the room fills with poison gasPatterson:Patterson: let me out! help! help!Mr Beast: there is no escape, Mr PattersonMr Beast: they say you write really fast, mr pattersonMr Beast: but how fast can you really write?Mr Beast: before you, you will find all the materials you need to write a complete-Patterson: doneMr Beast:

Mr Beast: whatPatterson: i'm donePatterson: i just wrote 'Jack Fell Down and Broke His Crown,' 'Operation: Edelweiss' and 'They Saved the President's Brain.'Mr Beast: you wrote THREE books???Patterson: actually, i wrote a fourth in the time it took you to reactPatterson: i call it 'Hello Operator? get me... ADVENTURE!'

Mr Beast: you wrote 4 books?!?!Patterson: actually now i've written 8Mr Beast: my godMr Beast: he's like some unholy union of mercedes lackey and william f johnstone

Patterson: it looks like i'm trappedPatterson: i better call for helpPatterson: because when you have a problem and no one else can helpPatterson: and if you can find themPatterson: maybe you can hirePatterson: the A TeamPatterson: [dialing phone] hello, clive custler?

Clive Custler: hello this is clive custler, big money ru$ltaCustler: i was just chilling on my derelict battleship, with my gang of elite libertarian commandosPatterson: clive! you've got to help me!Custler: don't worry jamesCustler: no job is too bigPatterson: i've been captured by mr beastCustler: new phone who dis