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AMA Questions for Melania + Sarah (Patreon)

Published:
2019-06-07 19:14:19
Imported:
2026-06

Content

For tomorrow night's #PiatPJParty, Health + Eli will make an appearance in character as Sarah + Melania. They will take questions from the live feed, but in order to cover as many as possible, we're opening it up to Patrons. 

Ask your Qs here or post them to Twitter using the hashtag #PiatPJParty. 

What do you want to know from Melania and Sarah? 

Comments

Teresa Gomez

Sarah, what is your go-to dodge for avoiding answering reporters questions?

John

What is sex like with Donald for Melania, and what role does Sarah play if any?

Max

If there was ever parody porn involving an intimate relationship between Sarah and Melania, what would you call it?

Diana

Melania, did you go tux shopping with Donald?

Irish Wristwatch

Melania, tell us the story of how Baba Yaga cursed your bloodline for your hubris.

Stormy Decisis

I want to become a better public speaker. What advice can you give me?

Ashley S

Melania, what is really happening when you disappear from the media spotlight for weeks at a time?

Ryan Enbom

Melania, who of the Scathing hosts has the best fashion sense?

Rich Davies

Fuck Marry Kill: Junior, Eric, and Barron?

Ryan Enbom

Sarah, fuck, marry, kill: Alien, Predator, Heath?

Mark E

Can Sara describe her perfect meal?

eeee oooo aaaaa

For Melania, what is your favorite tongue twister? For Sarah, if you had 3 months to prepare for a boxing match vs Mike Tyson, how would you train?

Eyjafjallajökull The Icelandic volcanoe

Sarah, what tips have you gotten from the North Korean media on how to defend our glorious leader Donald? & Melania, what’s it like living with a man with a micropenis, or more importantly, which size dildo do you use when pegging the president?

The Younglings Had It Coming

For Sarah, what's the worst kind of dog (both generally and taste wise)? For Melania, why is Atlas Shrugged so much better then Ulysses?

Ryan Enbom

Sarah: on a scale of 1 to 10, how broken is Tall Tyler's spirit?

Adam Martin

For Melania, what are your decorating tips for creating the scapes of Hell we see so often in your holiday decorations? And for Sarah just how tall is Tall Tyler?

Icculus90

For Sarah: what is your pump up routine before going in front of the press? For Melania: are you OK? Do you need help?

Eric Williams

Melania, how upset would you say the president gets when you forget to blow raspberry's on his tummy after his diaper change? Sarah, how upset do you get when Melania forgets to blow raspberry's on the president's tummy? And why?

A.J.

Sarah, how has your faith in your father been shaken by your inability to order as much cheese as you want in a restaurant? Melania, is your current situation better or worse than when you were working as a plucky sex worker in the mean streets of Ljubljana, and how? Also, pronounce "Ljubljana."

Ben Wilcox

Melania, could you tell that the queen is a lizardperson when you met her? How good was her human suit?

David Morgan

Sarah, has any human Male been able to sexually satisfy you?

Andrew

Both - what is your favourite food / drink / condiment. I'm betting 'tears of caged freedom children' as a dressing on any meal for Sarah.

Rich

How long has your forbidden love been hidden? What first attracted you to the other?

Magichroma!

What are you gonna do the second you are free from the trump presidency

Mark Siefert

Sarah: We know that former governor Mike Huckabee is your father, but what Lovecraftian goddess of chaos and madness bore you and are your folks still together? Melanie: Just what are the sleeping arrangements between you and Donald in the White House?

Bob Brown

Melania: you are 49 years old. How do you stay looking so young and soulless? Sarah: You are only 36. What non existent God did you offend to look so old... and also soulless.

tronvillain

Sarah, what was the maple syrup for?

Matty B

Which women from History (Herstory) inspire you the most

Olivia Peachley

Why have neither of you left the Orange Monstrosity?

Christopher Dalpe

Sarah, what made you decide to take this press conference over the other 6 dozen you declined to do in the White House? Melania, what Tim burton nightmares do you have cooking up for the Holidays at the White House this year?

Cheryl L.

What are your favorite cocktails and snacks?

Bob Smith

For either, what does a Cheetos’ asshole smell like?

Katt

Melania, how man plastic surgeries have you had, really? Why do you always make that face? Is it because Trump stinks? I bet it is.

Luce Cruz

If you were any kind of wheeled vehicle (car, truck, big rig, bus, RV, bicycle, scooter, rusty roller skate, etc,,) what would you be, and why?

Bill Dowling

How do you stay looking so young, hot, and sexy? Also, same question for Melania.

Jo

For either, which hero would you main in Heartstone?

Jeremy Huffman

Sarah, how did you finally get Heath to understand that you are into him? He admit the encounter was worth the pitying looks he got from the EMTs?

Cindi Lynch (Yes, THAT Cindi Lynch.)

Melania: Do any of the cabinet members ever ask you about your pre-First Lady past, or make snide comments about the naked pictures? How do you feel about having had them taken: are you proud or embarrassed?

Julie Wine&Reason

Melania, do you often wish for death, or are you going with the "I'll outlive him and inherit everything" strategy? I'm just curious how you cope.

The Good Crabs

Sarah: Have you ever seen that guy who likes being crushed and Melania in the same room at the same time? Melania: Did you marry Donald because you enjoy being physically and emotionally crushed as much as possible?

GrayGooGirl

Horse-sized duck or 100 duck-sized horses?

Robert Anderson

Sarah, how many babies can you eat in one sitting? And do the presidents balls get in the way when you are feeding?

Robert Anderson

Sarah, what is the procedure for cooking the perfect steak?

Christopher Arguin

Using the international standard blink code, do you need help? Please try to blink without a silly accent.

Grace Hughes

Melania and Sarah, you both should do a buddy cop show! If you did what you y'all call it, and can Tall Tyler play the the overworked captain whose had too much of your shit?

Tristan Miller

Sarah, is crushing skulls between your thighs an absolute necessity for sculpted legs, or is there a vegan options for Eli?

Zachary Z

Melania, what's your go to race and class in DnD? Sarah, will you ever find love?

JR Poklemba

Melania, what was your favorite DragonballZ Episode?

Hypatia

Sarah, how do you have such a soft and warming voice?

JR Poklemba

Sarah, which PiaT member is the most attractive?

Chris Gray

Melania, what was up with the "I Don't Care..." jacket? I assume written English was a barrier. And Melting Kelly Clarkson, we all know your brother likes killing dogs, what is your favorite thing to torture and/or kill (not counting migrant children)?

Christine

What are your Hogwarts houses?

Christine

Who are your favorite and least favorite members of the White House?

Christine

What would you do or say if you were stuck waiting for hours in a Moroccan airport after missing your connection?

Nemoutopian

Sarah, what is it like to be an Orwellian mouthpiece of lies and dishonesty? How do you reconcile that with claims that your religion calls upon you to be honest and truthful? And do you think your religious background has helped or hindered you in your work?

Nemoutopian

Sorry if the three part interconnected question is cheating .

Carrie McMillin

Where do yall take the kids on play dates?

Artful Codger

Melania, you're familiar with fashion. Do you think Donald will look better in striped or orange coveralls?

Jake The Fake Jake

What STDs has Trump given each of you respectfully? Melania, your kids are not an acceptable answer.

Mark H

Melania, what is your pump up routine for getting through happy fun sexy times with your husband?

TheOldDruid

In our new Handmaid's Tale future, would you rather be a fertile fuckdoll, or an infertile incel?

Mark H

Melania, is Sarah really just Mike Huckabee in a wig and makeup? Sarah, does Melania copy more than Michelle Obama’s speeches?

Miles

Of the crusty old billionaire cabinet members, who has the nicest saggy butt?

A turn knees general

Melania- is it really Yeti pubes and a dick like the mushroom character in Mario Kart?

crystaloftruth

Sarah, can you teach us how to lie without caring?

Nemoutopian

Melania. Did your "I really don't care, do u?" jacket reflect your views on migrant children separated from their parents, or did they just not make an overpriced jacket made from recycled industrial strength trash bags that said "Fuck those brown kids and their parents."?

Breeding McNery

I have a work outing tomorrow night, please tell me video will be available after the fact.

Deanna T.

Sarah, do you honestly believe the words that come out of you mouth, or do you just go to your happy place in your head while talking, and could down the days until your job ends?

Deanna T.

For Melania, did you marry the Tweeter in Chief for ANYTHING other than his money, and if so, what was it? Do you make love in the flickering light of candles made from the melted down possessions of migrant children while "Hail to the Chief" plays softly in the background ?

Deanna T.

How do we watch/listen to the pajama party?

Doogle

Sarah, is it true that you only support a border wall because you think it means everyone will have to enter America by crossing over the toll bridge you live/lurk under?

The Reecer Family

Sarah & Melania: Tell us the awkward stories of your high school proms!

The Reecer Family

Don’t know if I’m allowed to ask a second question but, Sarah & Melania: what are your kinks? Eli & Noah same question, but have your wives answer. 😂😂😂

Dr. Bonk_Horse

Does Heath know of or watch the Wisk(e)y Vault on the you tubes?

Doom

Melania, what is your favorite Broadway show? Have you ever seen the book of Mormon?

Doom

Sarah, can you share your favorite child recipes? I'm assuming you cook them before you eat them..?

Doom

Sarah, can you sing us a lullaby?

Not Another Podcast

Blood dome battle, who would win Sarah Huckabee Sanders or Dick Chaney?

Gainfully Unemployed

Melania, how is progress coming on that escape tunnel you've been digging under the White House lawn? Is it hard to dig with nothing but your husband's discarded KFC sporks?

Lefty Conspirator

I want to hear them read aloud the live search feed from PornMD.

Bennykins the great.

For Sarah: The president once heavily implied that he is sexually attracted to his daughter. How is your relationship with your father?

Robert Anderson

Melania, if you could be a air, water, earth, or fire bender which would you be? How exactly would you use your power to torment Trump?

Baron Atomy

Melania, what is your favorite Slovenian delicacy?

Baron Atomy

Sarah, what kind of Super Smash Bros. / Mario Kart stats would you have?

Baron Atomy

Melania, what is one thing about you that would surprise people?

Baron Atomy

Sarah, what's the one thing that keeps people swiping right on your Righter profile?

Kay Gaffney

Would you do an FMK with the top officials in the Trump scandal universe? (ideas: Trump, Pence, Kellyanne Conway, Steve Bannon, Jeff Sessions, Jared and Ivanka, Don Jr, Paul Manafort, Michael Flynn, Rudy Giulani, yourselves)

Kaela Mensha Khaine

Sarah - could you tell us, in detail, why you think the fed is a Ponzi scheme?

Kaela Mensha Khaine

Melania - could you tell us your thoughts on the Adnan Syed case?

Bogo D. Boonie

Both: What would go on your perfect sandwich?

Hypatia

I second his second question.

JR Poklemba

Melania, would you ever go on "Kicking it with Carl?"

Nemoutopian

For Sarah. Can you please give an example of how you would do PR work for Thanos if he ever felt inclined to recruit your services?

Cody Clark

@ Andrew. As an MD/Va/DC cool kid, do you have any advice for atheist Activision for people who are new to the movement on the metro area?

Embrace your own void this is mine

For Melania if trump launches space force, will you and special agent orange go and meet the troops? Be the “First Lady” on Mars, which the moon is also a part.

Rubber and Heels

Why would Sarah work for one of her underlings?

Dustin Hanson

When you’re about to throw a knuckle in the ‘ol tuna taco and Jill one out for the night, what is your go to PornHub category?

Dustin Hanson

Or perhaps a duet of Summer Lovin’

Dustin Hanson

Who would you have to throw off the cliff to acquire the Soul Stone?

Michael Petro

So.. I see that the cog dis boys got DR novella on their show... So mr bosnick did ya see that coming :) ? Damnit I used ... Sorry. :)

Kaela Mensha Khaine

For both: what is your least-favorite Hearthstone Deck to play against? Also, we really need you all playing Warhammer 40k. ;)

Johnny Dahmer

Sarah - Describe why Thanos was correct.

Johnny Dahmer

Melania - Describe your favorite date with your husband, the burnt Staypuff Marshmallow Man.

Andrew

Melania, If Stormy Daniels was trumps free pass (we will call it that for the purpose of the question) Who would your free pass be?

George Romaka

Melania! When did Donald stop beating you?