Tattoo Caption (Patreon)

You and Sophia had been friends for as long as you could remember. She was your typical tomboy. Short dark hair, olive skin and an attitude that would kick your ass. You kept no secrets from her. And she mostly did the same except one.

Sophia had gone away for college and while your friendship survived, one secret grew. She admitted to you that when she was drunk she got a tattoo. You were shocked, but also found it funny. She had never told you what it was or where it was, which made it all the more confusing as your friendship had taken you on plenty of chances for that tattoo to make an appearance.

You asked, then begged, then pleaded to see that tattoo and Sophia denied it every time. You were starting to give up hope. It was a hot summer day and you were hanging around at home when Sophia asked if she could come over, she had a favor to ask. By her tone you could tell it was a big one. You said of course, you had nothing going on.

She arrived in a pair of sweatpants and a stripped red and white tank top. She looked nervous but you both went to the kitchen to grab a drink and talk. After getting refreshments she blurted out what she needed.

"I need a job." She said nervously. You blinked a few times not prepared for that but also understanding what she was asking. You worked in HR, you had a hand in the hiring process for your office.

"That might be a bit of a conflict of interest." You replied trying not to sound too dismissive. She was your best friend, but also her worth ethic wouldn't fly in your office and she was a bit of a gossip.

"I'll do anything." She said gulping. Anything you thought as your mind went to the one thing that might be worth this.

"Show me your tattoo." Was all you said and her face dropped slightly. She wasn't ready for that. She offered anything else, but you wouldn't budge. Tattoo for a job, seemed more than fair. She closed her eyes, paced for a moment before agreeing.

"Fine, I'll show you my tattoo this once." Sophia said as she turned away from you. For a moment you thought she'd lift the back of her shirt for some hidden back tattoo, but instead she dropped her sweatpants. You couldn't help but laugh as Sophia was left standing in her blue and white undies, the white and blue was separated into triangles and the blues had patterns in them. This was almost worth it more than the tattoo.

It got even better. Before you could say anything or even laugh more, Sophia reached down to her right leg hole of her briefs and pulled them up, giving herself a bit of a half wedgie. Now you began to laugh as you saw her tattoo. There on her butt cheek was a green version of the Venus de Milo, specifically a gummy version of the famous statue from an episode of the Simpsons, one of Sophia's favorite shows.

You laughed harder than you ever had before. Helping her get a job was well worth this and you laughed at her expense. You could understand why she hid this from you. The entire time she glared at you from over her shoulder.

"If you ever tell anyone about this I'll pull your underwear so far over your head you'll taste cotton for a month." She threatened as she pulled up her pants. You promised you wouldn't tell anyone.

As a man of your word, you helped her get a job and waited for it to go south. It never did, in fact Sophia turned out to be great in the office. She was a hard worker, popular and raised morale. To be honest, you were a little jealous. You'd been there for a few years eyeing a promotion and Sophia was being talked about in the same breath after only a few months.

It may have gotten so annoying that after grabbing some after work drinks with co-workers you let it slip about her tattoo, just to knock her down a peg or two. No harm no foul, you thought.

You were sitting in your office on a nice casual Friday, dressed in your most casual but work appropriate jeans and a polo shirt when your door opened and Sophia walked in. She looked like her tomboy shelf in her own jeans and graphic tee.

"So, Angela from account asked if it hurt when I got my butt tattood." She said closing the office door behind her. You were trapped and she had that look in her eye, the one where you got your butt kicked.

But you were both work place professionals, she wouldn't do anything here you thought. You put up your hands like you might try to explain it was an accident. You didn't have the chance before you knew it you were bent over your desk with Sophia on the other side reaching into your pants and grabbing your white briefs. The closed office muffled your shouts of pain and indignity as she yanked your tigthy whities up and over your head. The pain was unbearable but deep down you also knew you deserved it for letting her secret out.

She was right about one thing though, you were going to taste cotton for quiet a while.