Dragon Age: Veilguard: Laughs at the Lighthouse (Patreon)

Lace Harding was sitting in the common area of the Lighthouse, a refuge within the fade where Rook’s crew made their homebase. The red headed dwarf was currently sitting in the dining hall talking about her past experiences in the Inquisition with Bellara Lutare, an elf veil jumper.  

“Besides Solas, you said there was another elf on the Inquisitor's team?” Bellara asked as the pair were on their second round of mead. Lace stretched from her seated position. She was wearing her more casual clothes for hanging around the Lighthouse. A white tunic, brown trousers and a small bronze chest plate, just in case something happened along with a red silk sash to tie it all togther.. 

Rook was out with Darvin and Emmrich, while Lucanis was doing Antivan Crow business. That left the remaining members of the team waiting at the Lighthouse. Since it seemed like Rook wouldn’t be back for a while, the elf had suggested grabbing a drink, which got her to asking questions about Lace’s past teams. 

Bellara was also dressed casually and not that dissimilar to Lace. The elf wore a white tunic with brown trousers and a green scarf. She removed most of her trinkets, belt and even the yellowed skirt that went over her trousers. 

“Yes, that would be Sera. She was...” Harding leaned back and thought to her time as a scout in the Inquisition. 

“A lot. She was a lot.” Was all Lace said before she began to chuckle. 

“What do you mean?” The elf asked as she let down her hair, before putting the black locks back up in a bun. The dwarf took a deep drink for a moment deciding how to answer. 

“Well, Sera was a bit of a prankster. A lot of pranks.” Lace said remembering all that the infamous friend of Red Jenny. 

“Pranks?” Bellara gasped.  

“Yeah, a lot of pranks.” Harding said, taking a long sip. While she wasn’t the only target, she had also experienced Sera’s jokes. Her elven companion looked more interested the more Lace talked. 

“Well?” Bellara asked, waiting. Harding raised an eyebrow. 

“Well, what?” 

“What did she do? Like what were these pranks?” 

Harding let out a sigh. She wasn’t sure how much she wanted to divulge as she had been on the receiving end, but the mead was loosening her tongue. 

“While her last big pranking spree involved a lot of wedges.” Harding said, remembering how Sera had targeted her and Cassandra. 

“Wedges?” Bellara asked not understanding what Lace meant. The dwarf sighed as she’d have to explain it. 

“She would grab the back of your underpants and pull up.” The dwarf explained. Bellara’s smiles at the idea of the prank. 

“Really? That sounds so funny and she did this to you?” The elf asked, trying to imagine her dwarven friend having her undergarments yanked on. Lace could tell that Bellara wanted to hear her confirm it. That she, a scout who had fought against more than one world ending threat, had had her knickers pulled on. 

“Yes, and worse.” Harding said, getting a chuckle from her friend. 

“Worse? What’s worse than that?” The elf asked.  

Lace took a deep breath, grabbed her flagon of mead and finished it in a long gulp. Bellara watched as her friend finished. The elf was almost impressed, but also meant the dwarf was going to tell her something particularly horrid. 

The scout put the flagon back down, empty on the table. 

“Sera once pulled my undergarments up and over my head.” Lace admitted getting a shocked look from Bellara before the elf burst out laughing. 

“What?” The elf asked, looking at her friend, her mind not sure she heard Lace correctly. The dwarf felt her face grow hot as it was an embarrassing memory she was now reliving in front of her new ally and friend. 

“I got her back technically. The Inquisitor made her make amends with everyone she pranked, so I got my revenge.” Lace said, trying to remove the sting of embarrassment. Bellara continued to laugh. 

“I was never one for pranks, but I wish I was now. That sounds hilarious.” The elf said, laughing at the idea before looking at Lace. The Veil Jumper began to smile wider and leaned towards her friend. 

Harding knew what her friend was thinking before she asked. 

“No, not happening. Once was enough.” Lace said, leaning back and debating getting another ale. 

“Oh, come on. I just want to try it.” 

“No.” Lace said chuckling as she got up to refill her tankard. Bellara finished her own drink as she thought fast and an idea popped into her head. 

“If you let me, I’ll let you read the story I’ve been writing.” The elf said, getting the dwarf to stop and look at her. Lace had known Bellara had been writing something. The elf was creative, and she loved stories like the ones Varric had published. Rook had told Harding that the Veil Jumper was pretty good at writing, and Lace would be lying if she wasn’t interested. She slowly nodded. 

“Okay, fine. Just this once.”  

Bellara clapped her hands together in excitement. The dwarven scout put her empty tankard down and walked to meet Bellara in the middle of the room. She sighed and turned around, hoping whatever the elf had been working on was worth it.  

“I can’t believe I am doing this.” Lace said, hanging her head. “Willingly.” 

“Oh, it won’t be that bad.” The elf said excitedly to try the prank. If it was funny enough, she might add it to her story.  

Bellara sent her fingers down the back of the dwarf’s pants. Harding blushed as she felt her friend’s fingers wrapped around the waistband of the underpants that sat right below the surface of her pants. 

“Just be gentle.” The scout said before her Veil Jumper ally began pulling.  

“Eeeep.” Lace said blushing as Bellara gave a strong, but not devastating pull up on the white fabric. It wasn’t worse than what Sera had done, but it wasn’t comfortable. The white fabric slid between Lace’s cheeks as the waistband moved from their normally seated position towards the middle of her back. 

Bellara was giggling as she tugged on the fabric. The elf was debating pulling further, but a slight chuckle made the pair realize they weren’t alone. They turned to see Neve standing in the doorway watching. The mage wore her dark hair down, framing her face. Her complexation was darker than both of theirs's, but she wore brighter colors. A white blouse with a teal scarf hung loosely around her neck. She wore the same shade of teal pants. 

“That looks like fun, do I get a try?” Neve asked as Bellara let the waistband of Lace’s white underpants go. The material snapped back against Harding’s lower back, getting a wince from the dwarf. 

“No, no. That was enough.” Harding said as her hands went to her back to adjust the white fabric. 

“What was that about?” The mage asked as she joined the pair. 

“Research for my book.” Bellara said, chuckling as Lace gave her a look.  

“This better not happen to a dwarf in your story.” The dwarf said, looking at her friend. She turned her back to the mage, the white undergarments still peeking out of her pants. The elf chuckled. 

“Never. Though I think if I was going to add it to my story, I’d have to see it done.” Bellara smiled as she saw what Neve was about to do. “Just to better write the description.”  

Lace didn’t have time to react as she felt Neve reach out and grab the exposed waistband of her underpants. The mage didn’t wait to begin pulling. 

“Ahhh.” Lace said, her voice getting a bit higher pitched as Neve yanked on her white undergarments. While she had dealt with this plenty thanks to Sera, it was the first time in about ten years since she had gotten one and it was her second in only so many minutes. The mage was also pulling harder and higher than their elf friend. Harding could feel the leg holes start to slide out from her trousers and be visible.  

“You know, Harding.” Neve said as she pulled on the scout’s underpants. “I expected you to wear something a bit more personalized under your trousers. These are just very plain.” 

“I know.” Bellara added chuckling at her friend tugging on her other friend’s underpants. Lace’s face went red from the discomfort and for her friend’s mocking her underpants. She was on her tippy toes for a brief moment before Neve let go, the fabric snapping back against the dwarf’s lower back.  

The mage and the elf laughed as the dwarf stood for a moment in shock before her hands once again went to the back of her pants. 

“That was terrible.” Lace said as she slowly stuffed the fabric back down the back of her pants. 

“Oh, come now Harding. It wasn’t that bad.” Neve said, chuckling as the dwarf slowly fixed her undergarments. 

“Easy for you to say, you didn’t have your small clothes just yanked up your back.” The scout said, she was still plucking and adjusting.  

“You should do it to Neve.” The elf said, chuckling as Lace finished fixing herself. The mage looked to Bellara ready to shut that idea down, but in doing so turned her back to Harding. The dwarf decided to make her move. 

Neve opened her mouth to say something, but the feeling of hands reaching down the back of her pants turned her words more into noises.  

“Laahhhhh.” Neve said, her words were lost as her undergarments were pulled up her backside. The silk fabric easily slid between her cheeks. While the mage’s favorite color was teal, her undergarments were a shade of deep blue that neither of the other women would have guessed. While the scout gave a good yank, it wasn’t as bad as the ones she had just been given. The silk wouldn’t have been able to withstand that.  

The scout let the undergarments snap back after getting them to about the middle of the mage’s back. Neve quickly spun around to face the dwarf. Her face was indignant but more embarrassed than anything else. She was going to say something but now with her back to Bellara, the elf made her own move. 

Bellara let out a cackle as she grabbed the silk undergarments and gave a swift pull upwards. The mage let out another shout as her blue silk undergarments were pulled even higher, quicker. The sound of threads popping and of fabric on the verge of ripping was the only thing that stopped the elf from pulling further. 

Bellara let go and almost doubled over laughing from getting both of her friends. Lace gave a chuckle as well as Neve kept both women in front of her as she adjusted her silk drawers. Neve looked to Harding then to Bellara, giving her dwarven friend an eyebrow raised. 

They had both suffered, but not Bellara. 

The elf only stopped realizing when both of her friends had grabbed her. 

“This was her idea. I need to get her first.” The dwarf said as she spun the elf around.  

“We don’t need to do this. I think we’ve all had enough fun for the day.” Bellara said, pleading as she knew what was coming next. Neve gabbed at the struggling elf’s arms as Lace reached into Bellara’s pants. There was no hesitation as the dwarf found the fabric and began pulling up. 

The elf let out a sharp exhale of air as her friends laughed at her choice in undergarment. The fabric was dyed pink, a bright share, and adoring the brief cut underpants were different kinds of wildflowers. 

“You could use these to identify flowers in the wild.” Neve joked on how accurate the flowers were on the underpants. 

“We should try that next time were are in Arlathan forest.” Lace said, laughing. She pulled the underpants slightly higher, but not as high as she wanted. 

“Let me help.” Neve said as she released Bellara’s arms and grabbed some of the pink fabric. The elf let out a little scream as her friends got her pink flowery undergarments to her shoulder blades. Lace and Neve howled with laughter as the elf was almost lifted off of her feet. 

“What are you three doing?” Taash asked. None of them had realized the Qunari had entered the room. 

“Teaching Bellara a lesson.” Lace said, getting a chuckle from Neve. 

“It’s a prank. We are just getting her back.” The mage offered as an idea popped into her head. 

“Oh, it looks uncomfortable.” Taash said as they saw how red Bellara’s face had gotten. The elf gave a nod of agreement that it was uncomfortable. 

“Do you want to try, Taash?” Neve asked getting a squeak of no from Bellara.  

“Uhh, sure.” The Qunari said as they walked over to the group. They towered over the three smaller women.  

“Just grab and pull.” Lace said as the large Qunari hand grabbed the fabric the dwarf had just been holding. Neve also let go allowing Taash to give their full effort. 

“I just grab and pull?” The Qunari asked as the elf whimpered, trying to mentally prepare herself for what was to come and cursing herself for getting into this position. 

“Yes, very simple.” Neve said snickering waiting to see how bad Taash would make this. The Qunari shrugged and pulled. They pulled up and the already stretched underpants made it to their limit. Within seconds Taash had already lifted Bellara into the air. The pair laughed as the Qunari lifted the elf off of the ground by her undergarments.  

Taash gave a small chuckle as they held Bellara in the air by the pink fabric with one hand. The elf’s feet were now a foot and a half off the ground, kicking at the air for any purchase. 

“This is fun. And those are cute Bellara.” The Qunari said referring to their embarrassed friend’s underpants. Taash could have held Bellara there all day but let the elf down after a few minutes. 

“Ow.” Bellara said as she rubbed her butt once her feet were on the ground. Lace and Neve wiped some tears from their eyes as it was the funniest thing they had seen.  

“That was fun. We should do that more often.” Taash said, still chuckling. Bellara looked to Lace and Neve. They could almost read the elf’s thoughts as she turned to face the larger person. 

“Your turn.” Bellara said as she quickly adjusted her undergarments to get them to a somewhat correct position. The larger person shook their head. 

“No, no, no. That isn’t happening to me.”  

“I love that idea.” Lace said, taking a step forward. 

“It is only fair.” Neve said joining the other two. 

The Qunari turned to run. 

Taash made it a few steps towards the door before their companions landed on top of them. While the Qunari was bigger and stronger than all of them, they were caught off guard, and this wasn’t a true fight. They landed on their stomach as the three smaller women focused on keeping them down. 

“Ahh, get off me.” Taash shouted as their companions dogpiled on the Qunari.  

“Watch the horns, you could have stabbed me.” Neve said joking as she dodged her friend’s horns as she sat between the larger figure’s shoulder blades. Harding flopped onto the larger being’s back as the two women tried to hold down their larger friend.  

Bellara on the other hand went straight for Taash’s pants. The elf pulled back the trousers and peered inside. 

“These are cute Taash.” Bellara said as she got a decent look at her friend’s undergarments. The Qunari was wearing full coverage underpants, which made sense for a dragon hunter. The waistband was thick and a deep red and the fabric was dark grey that was almost black. 

“Do not.” Taash said as they knew where this was going. 

The Veil Jumper paid them no mind as she reached out and grabbed the thick waistband. The elf gave no time for a reaction as she began to pull. Lace and Neve both laughed as Bellara began pulling with all her might in the hopes of some level of revenge. 

“Here, let me help.” Neve said, leaning forward. The mage grabbed a fair share of the undergarments as the three women pulled them further between the Qunari’s cheeks. Taash’s eyes went wide as the force of the pulling doubled and soon tripled as Harding joined in. 

“Sorry, Taash. We have to.” The dwarf said as all three women hauled back on the now misshapen underpants. The leg holes were out and quickly climbed further up the Qunari’s back. 

Taash made it to their hands and knees, but had mostly given up fighting back, accepting their fate as their friends pulled her undergarments higher. They let out an ahhhahhhh of discomfort before collapsing back down as a strong tug knocked them off balance. None of the three women were jostled as they continued to pull on the Qunari’s underpants. 

“They’re so stretchy.” Bellara said, laughing as the trio got the waistband closer now almost to the back of the Qunari’s head. 

“They are so close to hooking on Taash’s horns.” Lace said joining in on the laughter. She caught Neve’s eye then Bellara’s. “We have to do it.” 

Taash almost made it to their hands and knees again but the three women working in unison, plus the pain in their rear made the victory short lived as they were soon on the ground again as the waistband crept ever closer to the horns on their head.  

“All most there.” The elf said as the three pulled with one last effort, and the waistband slid over the horns on the Qunari’s head. They were successful and quickly moved out of the strike zone. 

The three rolled off of the larger person, laughing as they got a few steps back. The Qunari slowly got to their feet, but their head awkwardly unmoving as they moved. Taash turned to face their companions, unable to move their head very well due to the fabric now pulling their head back. 

“Oh, I hate all three of you.” Taash said as they tried to move their head, but it was extremely difficult with their underpants hooked onto their own horns. The three women began laughing at their friend and how Taash’s underpants were hooked to their horns. The black fabric was at its limit and if Taash moved their head anymore the fabric threatened to give way from the strain. 

“Sera would be dying of laughter.” Lace said as they watched the Qunari stumble around for a moment, their arms not at the right angle to adjust the discomfort of having their underpants over their head. 

“How long should we leave Taash like this?” Neve asked, wishing she had a way to save this memory forever. 

“Oh, at least until Rook comes back.” Bellara said, chuckling. Taash’s face went redder from the embarrassment of Rook seeing them like this.  

“Let’s not.” Taash said embarrassed. 

The three ladies waited a moment, letting the Qunari suffer a bit longer. 

“Alright, we’ll help you.” Neve said as the three chuckled. Taash awkwardly went down to one knee to allow the three shorter ladies to help. It took them longer than expected as the undergarments were pulled tight thanks to being hooked onto Taash’s horns. After a few minutes of struggling, the underpants snapped back against Taash’s lower back. 

“Finally, relief.” The Qunari said as they stood and undid the front of their trousers. With both hands, Taash began to de-wedge the undergarments. They were just finishing up when Lace remembered another prank Sera liked to pull. 

“Sera also loved to do this.” Lace said, laughing as she grabbed Taash’s trousers. The Qunari’s pants were easily pulled to their ankles, exposing their muscular legs and the full display of the box shaped black undergarments with their red waistband that were now a little stretched out.  

Neve let out a chuckle and Bellara gave a hearty belly laugh. Taash grumbled and adjusted their trousers. 

“Let’s do that to Rook later.” The elf said, laughing at the idea of Rook’s face at the prank. 

“Now that idea I like.” Taash said, liking the idea of not being on the receiving end.