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D&D Court: Bonus Cases - Garage Rangers, Table Exes, and Minority Resquirt (Patreon)

Published:
2025-08-15 16:52:19
Imported:
2026-06
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Content

Dungeon Court is back in session! Join Justices Murphy, Tanner and Axford, along with Bailiff Jay, as they pass judgement on your trials at the table!

CREDITS:

Sound Mixing and Editing by Trevor Lyon

Dungeon Court Theme Song by Sam Weiller

Files

Comments

Karina Osbourne

I don’t see the main feed dnd court episode! Just bonus cases for us blessed folk omg

yeow

I actually had to pause and listen to that EP— thanks for reminding me that exists gang

Denatonia (Haven)

I don’t think there is one, main was Tortle Tank today no?

Kellyd

Tortle Tank is the main feed ep this week

clerby

“we can celebrate things along the way” - emily’s immense wisdom 🫶🏽

Jay

Been listening to your podcast while snorkeling, greetings from Greece :D

Blubread00

With players like the ranger I take the ZachTheBold approach of slapping a dunce hat on them and shooting them with a confetti cannon

thiswayjose

Collision Course is a fantastic album.

thiswayjose

HEAR HEAR!! Also, y’all should have him on!!

sam fusco

TRYYYIIIINNNGGHH TO BENDD THE TRUUUUUTH

Lauren

"Go into the garage" HAS to be the new fuck off

Roz

Truly a TRAVESTY that we missed the opportunity to ask "when did the Collision Course EP" come out?

Unbaked

collision course mention, lets goooo

Gearbox

God garage ranger case bugs me, everyone deserves to be sentenced for lack of communication. It's a bad move to go and hang out in the garage for an hour because you don't get what you want, but it's also bad dming to *let* someone sit in the garage for an hour because you don't have an above-the-table talk about expectations at the table.

kaylee w

He’s a fan, too! Spotted wearing NADDPOD merch and he has a tour poster

nvsblty

just roll the dice and say what you got, that's the game. if you want to just make stuff up go do improv.

Sand Panda

We need an encode, sure we want more...

Bethany

BRB have to go listen to Numb/Encore real quick

Travis Bliss

Minority Resquirt, the waterpark area of the Minority Resort

Blank5213

Dsdsssssmkahmmnmmmmtooooiioookokiiii4imkmorhmm mn

Frank

Chuck E Cheese in the Garage, the much anticipated prequel to The Woman in the Wall

clerby

20 years old and don’t know how to regulate your emotions… 360 no scoped me murph, ouch!

Emil

Thank you for reading my case! I think the reason it's hard to just say the barbarian doesn't like it is because I've been letting it ride for six months now and it feels like the window to say something in a normal way has closed, and I'm not sure how to reopen it. My involvement in the breakup was just advising and comforting/listening to venting both and serving as an intermediary in the leadup and in the aftermath. I was also physically present when it happened because they broke up while at a cabin the three of us were renting for a weekend. So I kind of don't want to go on another trip with them, chlorox milk park or not

Sofa loaf

Not a cabin breakup!!! The worst!

Dr. Eggman

The popping bubbles are so good

Mr. Dude Sky

The Garage ranger case is so weird to me. It’s the rangers class ability to get an animal companion and it’s just a wolf. Withholding it is just so strange to me.

The Wizard Stubborn

Not even kidding, I guessed 1946 for when did it come out.

Charles Leon

Legit stopped listening while working out to go listen to the Linkin Park/Jay Z album. Still slaps

AutoReroll

There was a full re-release of Hybrid Theory with each song remixed by a different rapper that was incredible. Reanimation is definitely worth a look into if you liked Collision Course.

Balnor’s Best Friend - Steve

Same. Now I wonder if someone somewhere is seeing a slight bump in the plays of that song and wondering why haha

Jorde

My friend dated someone last year who genuinely had a chuck e cheese obsession and has a full set of the animatronics in her garage ☠️ someone has definitely found their dads mouse smooching photos

Alyssa

You guys should make a website to get ordained as a dice christ clergymen

Walker Thurman

Regarding secret sessions, there is a pathfinder actual play called Burnt CookBook Party that I can’t recommend enough where they do this and, as an audience member at least, it’s dope as hell. Their party DOES have a slightly more tense/antagonistic vibe than most but if it works for you then it works

Stefan UrKILL (Figgy)

Sometimes I feel like Frederick’s was a fever dream (that definitely doesn’t exist anymore) but I still definitely own one of their robes and one of their corsets. At the time, the quality was shittier than Victoria’s Secret too I’m pretty sure. EDIT: huh! very surprised to hear it still exists (online), much less surprised to hear that the founder invented edible panties.

Del

As a Sufi, I always appreciate when Emily brings up Sufi poetry! I would recommend Rumi, Hafiz, and Kabir to anyone who hasn’t read any.

Anthony

I feel so honored to have my case be judged in the High Crit. 1 minute for each of us would have been so much better than a minute total and I’ve always felt the blame was mostly on the first player more than the DM, he knew the stakes and chose not to act. To add a little more context we were inside a Magnificent Mansion spell and we had the map out we all knew where to go - but on his turn he was asking about what he could see out the window, to which the answer was “nothing… the astral sea… the void…” and then he started joking about what would happen if he used Misty Step to go out there and things of that nature. So when the timer went off nobody had done moved even a single square on the map. We focused on escaping the fight and that’s how we managed to survive it, becaus thankfully he didn’t chase us out of the Tower/Mansion.

Stefan UrKILL (Figgy)

@ Myles: your writing is absolutely incredible, holy shit! Do you have a creative writing/English degree? I had to listen to your submission twice. WOW.

Tony

Murph said he wouldn't use a timer but I've heard him apply time pressure to the party multiple times!

Bryce Peterson

Linkin Park/Jigga is a must in case anyone didn’t take them seriously in the beginning.

grass_illusion

i’m a SPED teacher on summer break, listening to 8-10 hrs of naddpod a day walking around portland doing nothing, sense of humor BROKEN minority resquirt

Beav

Paused and started listening to Encore/Numb... That was six songs ago.

Nim

Collision Course EP unironically still in the rotation

Ty Power

Going to the garage is weird as hell but the dm was definitely wrong in the ranger case. Beast master “magically summons a primal beast… you determine the kind of animal the beast is”

Aster Ellis

It's a staple for early morning prep shifts everywhere. That, a joint, and a redbull will make you feel unstoppable

Eric Linklater

Yup, you gain a beast at third level and get to pick the beast. Refusing to give the ranger their chosen companion at third level is bizarre especially when it's clearly important to them. Going to the garage is a whole other kettle of fish though.

Renee Wild

I grew up in the 90s/00s in Southern California and I remember seeing Fredrick’s of Hollywood in malls. Never went in one but I would also avert my eyes

Jason DeVrieze

"Looking at old family photos and discovering an affair" is basically what happens in the Fabelmans

Adam!!!!!

and individual session would be fun IF everyone got one, then next session with them all together one/two of them are gone from their beds and the other(s) have to try and stop them

The Grinch (feral)

Is it just me or was this episode strangely erotic? (In a way that made me snort laugh)

Aidan Boyle

Garage behavior is crazy but the DM insisting on depriving the ranger of their entire subclass makes me want everyone to be punished

Ben Kullerd

I see your LINKIN PARK/Jay-Z collab EP and raise you Big Grams, the seven deadly sins-themed Phantogram/Big Boi collab EP

Cory Corenstein

I did in fact have to stop the episode to listen to Numb/Encore thanks

Matt Davis

They definitely came around to the right answer on the deal with the devil - have your secret meetings, but at a regular session where the devil is tempting all of them, so everyone gets to play that scene as their character.

Jutty700

Not to agree with the wolf guys behavior, but rules as written they are absolutely entitled to one, it clearly states that you gain an animal companion upon level up. In fact if you use the Tasha's beastmaster ranger you can straight up summon your animal companion magically whenever you so please

Nathan W

Hey I'm the person who submitted Garage Ranger. They left it out of the episode, but my original comment mentioned that the campaign later disbanded because it turned out the DM was abusive and tried, amongst other things, to push my friend into traffic. So big agree on punishing her as well lol

Apollo Sullivan

The Grey Album does exist! It’s Jay Z’s black album and the Beatles white album by Danger Mouse

Ken

Being a beastmaster ranger and not getting an animal is kind of a bummer.

Ken

Omg wow. That uh, seems to be important context!

Jolly Bee Happy

First time I’ve felt compelled to appeal the high court, but I think this beast master was royally shafted. Upon second listen, I think the DM is more experienced than the players. Which makes the situation as follows, a beast master requested a wolf as they leveled up and as an added bonus they made it part of the described narrative (a fight with wolves). The DM refused with a flimsy claim that there were no wolves in the forest (despite the precious fight). Even more depressingly, they sent the player physically away in a bizarre abuse of power. Help me understand why we are praising this DM’s behavior?

Sophie Buijsen

Witness Protection Milk Park is a beautiful phrase.

CSN

The nature of the garage makes SUCH a difference in how crazy that was. Garages range from tiny, musty hoarder holes to 3-car converted play-rooms and beyond. (Context in the comments makes it clear the DM was at fault, but I'm still curious where they "half-jokingly" sent the guy and didn't go retrieve him for an hour.)

CSN

See the submitter's comment below for critical context that does NOT reflect well on the DM.

Myles McDonough

That is so kind, thank you friend 🥰 Both, actually! English in undergrad, then an MFA in Creative Writing. When I'm not at my day job, I write fantasy and sci fi novels.

Myles McDonough

Jake, Emily, Caldwell, and Murph: thank you so much for your sweet words. I wrote that submission as my creative outlet after a long few days in the corporate world, just hoping to give Jake a chuckle. Your responses made my whole week ♥️

ethan guodace

That was possibly the best dice confession I have ever heard. Excellent work

The Witch of the Well-Struck Flint

Me and my sister actually did discover an affair (not with Chuck E. Cheese unfortunately) in an old photo album recently. Not in a garage. In a cupboard. It was kinda wild.

Mnixon

Thank u

Ro

You sound like a really good friend and I hope someday (soon) they both catch a bit of self awareness so you (and the other player unless they do indeed live for the drama) can catch a break <3

matty

u have to dip Chucky

matty

This was so funny mate hahaha

YourAnimeDad

I disagree with Caldwells take on private sessions, I use them quite frequently to help my players with specific asks that don't fit into a main session, and it does make tension but at our table we really like that. Also we don't have a lot of in persons sessions as well, idc this isn't a judgment I can get behind, I ask that the ruling be appealed

Belligerant_Me

Re: Devils - I would simply contact each player individually via text, and describe a dream sequence they have where the devil appears to each of them individually. Set aside the one on one irl table session part, and instead each player will know they had a dream where the devil appeared to them to make the offer one more time. It can even mention that it was aware each of them might have had different desires than they were willing to say in front of their friends. Then the dm might even get more than one of them on the hook with a deal, potentially creating conflicting deals or cross purposes

Belligerant_Me

Ah I see that they kinda got there with the notes idea

FiendishNoodles

Opening with a discussion of collision course and having numb trickle into the conversation throughout had me in stitches

Belligerant_Me

lol I now see they got to doing the dream sequence in an irl game. I still think they could do it outside of a real session as a text thread and it would be okay. Just need to seed in hints and clues as you go

Summer Tribe

What is this the bonus case for? There was a calling for cases, no main feed, then this?

t✨

i was wondering the same thing!

Scooter

the beast master ranger decision has me questioning the validity of this court.

Scooter

it would be like telling a spell caster they cant have any 2nd or higher level spell slots

Nothing But Table

D'you guys feel like if Emily has altered the hemp milk song to say "gimme THAT hemp! Milk!" Instead of "gimme A hemp!" It might have been able to still keep it's flow while making a bit more sense as a call and response song?

Mach T-Rex

How on earth was this detail left out?!

Mach T-Rex

Sounds like the beast master was just upset they didn't get the magically summoned animal companion their subclass is entitled to, so they figured they'd go into the garage and the DM would budge.

Pontus Knast

Some of the confessions lately have been absolute garbage, either people just bragging about cheating or like in this one, someone auditioning to be the fifth member of the podcast.

LarryLarryLarry

I 100% side with the beast master, and he needs new friends. Rules say he gets a wolf so just give him a wolf, its not game breaking for a wolf to be in the woods. Not one friend stopped playing the game to check on him. BAD FRIENDS!!

Vicarbatman

Okay, but, "Dinner, Deals, & Dice" sounds like it'd be an awesome TTRPG based around a dinner party, even make it a LARP

Summer Tribe

he sure did, I just missed the intro cause I guess

Summer Tribe

a lot of submissions are kind of weak (outside of surprise round, which is consistently pretty dope). most Tortle Tank submissions are from people who I don't think have ever thought critically about game design or done arithmetic as an adult even once. it gets a little tiresome, moreso when even the cast all knows the submission isn't particularly usable. DnD Court is usually somewhere in the middle but there are still a lot of cases that are instantly resolved by reading a paragraph of text

Stephen Fike

I feel like the beastmaster was completely in the right, rules written he gets a beast companion did any of the other players need a story reason for their new abilities and upgraded powers? Seems a bit unfair to have one player singled out needing a story reason to get their level.

Pali Endi

Murph with his hackles raised whispering “What the FUCK?” is my spirit animal

Victoria

“No wolves, no maidens, no mascots” goes impossibly hard lol

Adam!!!!!

this is absolutely #rangergate. why would they even leave that out?

tori

ehhhh sort of I guess? but he was really entitled and inpatient about it though. like she didn’t say absolutely no wolves ever she said just not right now. and to low key throw a fit about that is a little ridiculous cmon now to go sit in the garage for AN HOUR because your dnd character couldn’t get instant gratification is…bad and weird.

tori

sure but have you scrolled down to see the comment from the person who submitted that confession? and how much it made their week? sometimes things can just be fun.

tori

sorry i support women’s rights and wrongs. free my girl she did nothing wrong /j

Danny Storm

Definitely on the beastmasters side, that's their like entire subclass feature and I could only imagine how hurt I'd feel if someone told me to "go to the garage" that's insane

tori

i’ve read the other comments agreeing with you but did they level up in game? wouldn’t you normally level up outside of a session and work with dm to make your wolf part of the story? being so adamant that you are willing to sit by yourself alone in the garage about it mid session is strange to me.

Stephen Fike

Yeah I think they leveled up and that’s what prompted the wolf companion request. Based on comment from submitter, the dm was extremely hostile and controlling and even tried to push the ranger into traffic so I’m full siding with ranger. Behavior of sitting in a garage definitely weird, but being refused a part of your class that literally says magically summons a beast of your choice is also weird imo

tori

yeah I did see that comment as well but have we considered that maybe possibly perhaps the ranger deserved it? 👀 (JOKING TOTALLY JOKING LOL) but yes I do see your point and so I think everyone here sucks —the ranger, the dm and the other players too (because why didn’t anyone stop to check in on him? like does this specific dude absolutely suck or are all of these people assholes lol) (also in these cases of female dm vs male player I am like 🤨 is this misogyny or would he behave the same way with a male dm)

Dr. Eggman

I think sometimes people forget that the point of DND court is to make a funny podcast, not to tremble at the altar of Dice Christ. Personally, I really enjoy joining Murph in Murphing out over whichever batshit confessions Jake or Emily choose to read on the podcast

KaioftheTiger

I've only went to Fredrick's once, it's been a while since they've been a while

Benny Marx

Even without the added context of the DM apparently being cruel, I would side 100% with the ranger. Having a companion is kind of the Beastmaster's whole thing. The fact they didn't have one already meant either they just leveled up (which I doubt since that would mean they leveled up twice in one session), they didn't fully comprehend the rules when they did level up last (which would be on the DM if they're a new player), or they were waiting for the perfect animal, in which case they found it. It feels to me like the DM had a story idea for them getting their companion and wanted to railroad them into it. Which I think is really unfair. You can't delay a major aspect of a subclass for your perfect story moment. And if they really did want to avoid just magically summoning another wolf (which is allowed) or just immediately finding another one in the woods (which should also be fine), there were a bunch of ways they could have woven it into the narrative. Maybe the cries from the dying enemy wolf attracted a nearby pack. Maybe the bandits had another wolf that they weren't taking good care of that was still locked up in their cart. Maybe the enemy wolf was pregnant and they find a wolf puppy after, Jon Snow-style. It should have been an easy fix to give them what is basically the only reason anyone would choose to play as a Beastmaster.

Cory

Have one-on-one sessions been established as a thing that can happen, or has everything, even individual asides, happened at the table? If the former then he'll yeah make a deal with the devil. If the later then this betrayal breaks not only trust but the assumed rules, conventions and assumptions your players have been operating under and it becomes not only a PC-on-PC betrayal but a player-on-player and DM-on-player betrayal, which could break your table. You have to start establishing one-on-ones that have an effect on the main campaign, run one to two with each player then come back to this in a few months. Then this becomes an awesome moment instead of something that breaks trust between actual humans.

Atlantis Thermostat

For the first one, my DM has done private moments when offering deals with unsavory entities by doing it during session. So, we all knew something was going on above board but we werent sure what it was as we werent allowed in the same space. Granted, that was done online but even critical role does that- send people out of the room. I would say you could maybe go so far to do little moments with everyone to tempt them and play on how much the party trusts each other afterwards. The player already wants to do something without them knowing so she should have no issue lying to them.

Eric Olberding

I wonder if the wolf guy was not neurotypical. To go stand in the garage is such a literal interpretation of what the DM said. Either incredibly spiteful, or someone who literally heard the DM say that if they wanted a wolf they'd have to go to the garage and they said "Ok".

Hamish Pearce

Came to the comments for this exact take. Smacks of ASD in a big way. This guy has a teacher's aide in school. For sure.

Audro Baggins

This unlocked some memories for me in KC and my older sister dragging me there lol

Cortney Cline

That confession was incredible, truly inspired. Emily is wrong though, physical dice are not going to help if the game is online and no one can see what you're rolling. Because the temptation has nothing to do with respecting the thing giving you a result and everything to do with the fact that you are the only one who is seeing the result. I know, because I used to do this all the time. I've been working on it after hearing people like Emily and Sam Riegel talk about how much fun they get out of bad rolls, and I haven't done it in a long time, but I absolutely still think about it. Maybe that will stop if I ever get a failed roll that leads to something really cool or interesting happening ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯ Most of the time the failures aren't fun for me.

Nina Foxx

there is a plot of Five Nights at Freddy's where a sentient robot replaces a wife/mom after death- so not far off

Frogndog

Wait- why not "The Minority Resort"??

Jacob Ibarra

The fucking Chuck E. Cheese shoebox bit at the end had be literally crying, and I’m at work lol

Lilli of the bog

I agree and although I'm sympathetic as an autsy myself, I mean, you gotta get it together. If there's one thing I've learned it's that you either have to mask confidently in social situations or you gotta just let people know you're on the spectrum so they don't just think you're rude. Idk.

Caleb Shook

The best song on Collision Control is Points Of Authority/99 Poblems/ One Step Closer. I paused the episode to listen to the split lol

Bugbear

Why the fuck did they *let* him stand in the garage for an hour? That's insane. That is insane behavior. You can play off awkward interactions, you can spin stuff, and instead they just like..... encountered an awkward moment and fully leaned in and let it take over the entire session. No heros, I say

Bugbear

Yeah, right? That's so insane. Even if the player was being weird about it, you don't let that happen to people. Terrible vibes

Helen✨

There are several different kinds of boba, and one of them does indeed burst with juice! But the most popular type is tapioca boba, which is the kind Emily and Murph are thinking of. Everyone wins hehe

22 Hilda Street

I disagree with our honored justices about the beastmaster especially after the reveal that the DM was abusive. #RangerGate

Hunter Clark

I'm sure they could've waited and they would've gotten a new wolf. The DM told them that, and they refused to listen. Adults shouldn't act like that

Hunter Clark

It's unfortunately a side affect of having a comedy podcast. A lot of listeners think that because they listen, that they're as funny as the hosts. Unfortunately, that's not how being funny works.

Davis

But he gets a pet by the rules. Denying a pet is insane

Ricky King

As a 1998 baby I approve

Ricky King

Also I fucking love Minority Report independently of NADDPOD and to be catching up on the back catalog and hear more Minority Report references than I’ve ever heard is making me so happy

Drew Worth

I dunno fellow Naddpoles, I feel like in the Ranger case the player was mostly in the wrong. I mean yes, that class does get an animal companion, but to me (as a former DM) the DM's answer read as she was going to give him a wolf as they moved along the road. This is what I did for the beastmaster ranger in my old party to establish the animal's personality and paint a scene to make everyone attached to him. To say "Either give me my wolf right now or I'm leaving" is a huge escalation. The go stand in the garage but is a bit too far, but given the DM let them stay a half hour past the rest of the group just so they could be the same level as everyone I don't think this was a truly abusive move, if the DM was just a dick they would have said you're SOL bud, stay level 3 and wolfless and leave my house.

22 Hilda Street

the person who sent it in also said the campaign disbanded because the DM was abusive and she tried to push the ranger's player into traffic. The DM was a dick because one person shouldn't have to wait for an undetermined amount of time to get the thing their subclass automatically gives them RAW. if the player didn't have the rules backing them up then I'd agree that it is up to the DM, but this is a big thing that nerfs a player because everyone else gets their shit immediately, the paladin doesnt have to wait until they get to a church to swear an oath. plus if the person refused to move on without the animal companion, which they are entitled in this case, the DM should have revealed that it would be on the road.

Compound27

I was just about to type a possible solution to the devil case as Murph said it lol Man these D&D cases make me feel like a normal well rounded person lol. Be grateful someone DMs for you, be flexible with others and at the end of the day be humble and kind.

riskutforthebriskut

if a person wouldnt leave my house after the function, with demands, they're never coming back ever again lmao

Emil

They're all very kind and funny people, and we've been through a lot more than can be summarized in a comedy podcast submission together! They just don't get along anymore. I think maybe we just need to accept the fact that the group just can't be all together like we used to.