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D&D Court: Toxic Tables, Confusing Crits and the Tragic Tale of John the Horse (Patreon)

Published:
2022-07-22 05:46:43
Edited:
2022-08-05 05:21:33
Imported:
2026-06
Tags:

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AD-FREE EPISODE FOR $5+ PATRONS!

Welcome to Dungeon Court! Join Justices Murphy, Tanner, Axford, and the Fit yet Flatulent Bailiff Hurwitz as they convene to pass judgement on your trials at the table.

NOTE: Spoiler Warnings for Frozen 2 and Animorphs AND Guardians of the Galaxy (lol)

Get tickets to our upcoming live shows at naddpod.com/live.

CREDITS:

Dungeon Court Theme Song by Sam Weiller

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Comments

Rotem Cohen

I need to see the dingers scooter crew art

Natsuka

Of all the words you might want to call the Council of Elders but you aren't totally sure what the word means, "superfluous" has to be one of the funniest options lol

Summer Tribe

I didn't say I didn't understand it, I said it was nonsense. "Heroes and villains are way larger than life, so it's natural that they all have 5% to do something incredible or to fail against all (realistic) odds." holds no internal consistency, and doesn't follow your preceding statements. it also fails to explore that "5% to do something incredible or fail" doesn't mean anything, even given the case you don't have enough context. should they be subjected to constant acrobatics checks on the 1 in 20 chance that they just fall on their ass? why just the heroes and villains? there are other actors in a game of DnD

Blake Vandiver

There's a LOT of TTRPGs (not D&D) where you have to roll below your stat's value to succeed (i.e. if your Dex is 12, you have to roll 12 or below on the D20 to succeed). In those systems, a nat 1 is amazing and a nat 20 is pretty universally a failure and it is both weird and fun coming from a D&D/Pathfinder background

Summer Tribe

why come in so confidently wrong I wonder

pain938

The lowest i ever managed to get crit threat in 3.5 was like 5-20, by using a prestige class explicitly called out to be for bbeg's from book of vile darkness.

Bg

I thought I was remembering that confirming was raw for 3.5 but couldn't rightly figure out why they did that. Thanks for the explanation 4 years ago.

Levi Seidel

No way I caught this 50 secs after it posted

H-Train

the logo’s a bit zoomed in huh?

Garrett Morrow

GOTG VOL. 1 Spoilers Animorph Spoilers

Teo Tamashiro-Harris

Just wanted to say that despite the spoilers, since you did the Animorphs 8Bit Book Club, I've read all the Animorph books and they really are good even knowing what's coming. Highly recommend that Jake keeps reading!

Devyn N

For the sake of the horse story, the replacement horse was named “Not John” and I referred to him as the full name Not John every time. Thanks for reading my case!

Chloe Peifly

i’m crying laughing at the dog story

H-Train

also as an aside, raccoonicorns being made by raccoons consuming unicorn flesh doesn’t make any sense but i’m actually into it conceptually

AmberDextrous!

Re: Crit Confirmation - I started in 3.5e and then Pathfinder and this was the rule at the table I played at. If you rolled a Nat 20, you had to roll again and if you didn't get the AC on the second roll, it was still a hit but not a crit. If you did meet the AC, you got to crit. On the reverse, if you rolled a 1, but hit the AC in the second roll, you didn't have a critical failure, but if you didn't hit the AC, you did have a critical failure. It was explained as a balance mechanism - a way to get out of something really bad happening, but for balance you had to confirm something good happening.

華偉 曾

crit confirm is something similar to pf1 system, but worse, it's a must fix.

Devyn N

I definitely think Caldwells double down idea is smoother and less disappointing than the crit confirm

Devyn N

Did Murph reference fantasy high season 2 in the dog story? I just watched it and it definitely seems like magic is real and so is my frog has become an inside joke for them

King Wonderbread

Thanks for all the love you guys, gonna pitch Caldwell's idea soon and see how it goes ❤️❤️🙏🎲

Lee Blatchford

Thos was great and all but i can NOT be the only one who thought the best part was Murph knowing all the words to The Gummi bears theme song!!? Cause, no shame, was fully singing along!! Well played Murph!🤩🤣

Lulu_ Wi_

The Youtuber Dingo Doodles talked about a house rule with crits similar to crit confirmation but better. If you roll a nat 20, you roll again to see if you get another nat 20. If so you double crit. And if you roll 3 nat 20 in a row you insta kill the enemy. They insta killed the big bad of the campaing with this.

Anthony Ferguson

As already pointed out, Crit Confirmation is a thing in 3.5. On a nat 20, you roll again, if you hit the AC of the target, it is a crit. If you miss the AC, it is still a hit, but not a crit. This was pretty standard for the edition and I was baffled moving info 5e that a nat 20 was just a crit. Couldn't go back to crit confirm now though 🤣

Rinnie

I preferred the 3.5 crit confirmation rules.

Clairodactyl

I'm so glad I'm not the only person who knows the whole Gummi Bears theme tune and can sing it at the drop of a hat!

Sean Logue

Hey there, I gave those fuck/yeah dice you referenced at the Philly live show during our meet and greet! Glad to hear you enjoyed em.

Shane C

Dingers merch when???

Krowlove82

For the Crit Confirmation, I never played 3.5e so I don't know if it was ever RAW. However, my table plays with a rule that if you hit a Nat 20, you can choose to confirm it. Which just means you roll again and if you hit a second Nat 20, then instead of double dice, you roll 4x dice. If you roll a Nat 1 on the confirmation, it cancels out the crit. But anything inbetween just means it's a normal crit. And the pcs never have to, it's a choice. As I was writing this, literally Caldwell talked about this rule.... but yes, my table fully plays with this rule

Chris Truex

Pathfinder has crit confirmation. However, every table I've played at house ruled that Nat 20s were an autocrit. If you rolled something in your crit range otherwise (because of feats, skills, or weapon characteristics that expanded the crit range to more than just 20), THEN you needed to confirm

Nick Neverman

My pathfinder group uses crit confirmations to get crit cards. So no matter what you get double damage for a Nat 20, but a confirmed crit would have debilitating effects or even triple damage

Chris Truex

We had what we called a supercrit. After every crit, you could roll a d20. If this produces a nat 20 the damage is multiplied again. Then you roll again. If you keep rolling consecutive nat 20s, the multiplier keeps going up. It only happened a few times, but it was AWESOME when it did

Melissa Surges

I heard at least 2 references to Hot Boy Summer! Does it mean that campaign is fresh in their minds?! I need a sequel or Cool Boy Winter so BAD!

Shepard Price

Crit confirm in 3.5 is not homebrew it’s part of the systwm

JT Gwozdz

I've very confused how Murph and Em haven't heard of confirming Crits when they were playing in Brennan's 3.5 game. Was Brennan just not doing crit confirms?

Adah Kinzer

I also have a “yeah fuck” d20 and it does make crit fails more fun

Maleny

subtitled Hot Boys Save Chrickmas

Maya B

Ask Brennan about crit confirm he probably cut it bc he didn't like it?

jackalope503

What's wild is I was just relistening to the 8BBC episode where Caldwell and Emily sing the gummi bears theme song so the ending of this show was like a sweet little time capsule. Side note: have they ever considered bringing Jake on as an 8BBC guest? I think he might be alright at it

Declan Konesky

Confirming crits was basically a necessity in 3.5 bc the numbers were so wild. You could crit fish and have like 5 or 7 attacks while critting on 15-20. But ACs could be in the 30s. You'd get so many bonuses too that would double that you could do 300 dmg a turn no problem. It was a wild time. Even now I'm not wild about high numbers get in 5e but I sure do love how simple a crit and a fumble is again

Elizabeth Hart

Crit Confirmation is RAW in 3.5, it sounds like the submitter's DM was doing it a bit weird, but in 3.5 if you crit on an attack (not a skill check) you roll again to try to hit the target AC again, if you hit again you crit, if you don't, it's just a hit. The reason it worked like this is because of two main reasons, one, because it was very easy to build to crit on several numbers besides 20 (for example, a normal, ordinary rapier crits on 18, 19, or 20 in the hands of anyone) and, secondly, because ACs were higher, it stopped characters that could only hit on a crit (because they were so much lower level) from dealing double damage on every hit. Crit confirming on skill checks and nat 1s and having the DC always be 10 (and I guess not adding anything to the roll?) all does sound needlessly complicated though. Thus, despite missing some information, the righteous Crit Justices ruled correctly as always.

SnuggieWielder

Did anyone else catch the Dimension 20 reference near the end there? Murph said, “Dice Christ is real and so is my dog”, maybe in reference to Fantasy High Siobhan’s “Magic is real and so is my frog” :)

Andrew S

OK to make up for spoiling Frozen 2, Animorphs and Guardians of the Galaxy we are going to need Murph to dm Olaf, Rachel and Groot on a one shot (Caldwell, Emily and Jake respectively.)

Clever Innuendo

If you make a dating profile that's just a picture of a horse and shout out the Bible, you *will* get responses from a certain type of person.

Jack Farley

What a great ep! Also good for you starting one piece Caldwell lol, you’ll enjoy the next 1000 chaps

Ryan

Take your time and enjoy the One Piece journey Caldwell! It only gets better

Makeitsweat

Caldwell, Oda just gets better. I am excited about your journey.

Mattlikesfries

AYO CALDWELL READING ONE PIECE?! we love to see it

will s

Dm of dog here!! you all nailed the situation . All the players at the table were aware of the opportunity of dogs betrayal but wernt aware of our messages and how eminent the pvp was. But he knew he was a melee buld vs 2 and a half casters and I was only going to allow a couple rounds of combat anyway. I agree with Murph that i am trying to play tricks and i got tricked. Shout out to dog still going strong now with a giant spider mount!

farmerjoe_y

Dog on a spider, now that’s something I’d like to see

Nathan Wilson

Thanks, I was looking for this explanation and would have spelled it out myself if it wasn't here, but you broke it down perfectly.

Old Dirty Blastoise

Is there going to be a Toxic Tales from the Table segment? I have a few good ones that are so clearly just toxic players, it’s not even worth submitting to D&D Small Claims Court.

NemoKeine

Toxic Tales sounds solid as a side show...even if its just reactions to D&D nightmares

Heck

That DM got double dogged

Brian Geffre

Crit confermation was important too because with a few feats and a keen scimitar, you crit on a 12 or higher.

Brian Geffre

Especially when you had larger crit ranges. Easy to crit on a 12 or higher with a keen scimitar.

Brian Geffre

I had so much fun playing 2e for several years, but THAC0 is dumb, the saves were a mess and death upon hitting zero HP would mean everyone would be on their 4th character by episode 10.

aiyana graham art

Murph's little breath after Caldwell said "If everyone embraces the cringe is it still cringe?" was so funny

Gwilson

Well-well-well. Look at this Johnny come vaguely-lately, checking in on One Piece when there's only "5 years" left.

aiyana graham art

Sucked into the wheel well of a Carola is a big Gilear moment

drednauht

Critical confirmation is a pathfinder 1e thing. It made some sense because many weapons had expanded critical range, coupled with the improved critical feat, a rapier crits on a 15-20. It's a bygone era artifact of feat and item bloat.

Sarahsaurus

Racoonicorn, and the mechanic of it eating a unicorn, came from a Cantrip Cast video based on a random comment from a previous vid. Sounds like a fun creature. https://youtu.be/33ZR0E_N9GM

FiendishNoodles

The highest earner on Cameo was the late great Gilbert Gottfried cause who wouldn't want to pay him money to call your friend a sack of shit

Joey

The crew should SO do that toxic tales thing, there are stories of dnd toxicity that I hold in my heart and long to release but I feel aren't worthy of dungeon court because it more focuses on the drama/group dynamics rather than dnd mechanics the court usually deals with

Garga Lenoir

Caldwell used a common argument online, "if there is supernatural elements in a setting, you are not allowed to discuss its internal consistency". I disagree with it, all settings need internal consistency. So why is are the criticals consistant in D&D settings? Because they're not realistic, they're epic. In D&D a human warrior with a few levels can take canonballs to the face and they'll probably be entirely fine the next day. Heroes and villains are way larger than life, so it's natural that they all have 5% to do something incredible or to fail against all (realistic) odds.

Lindsey Schick

I have the necklace of the d12 of the riverboat shanty dice!! Eleanor is the best!

Devyn N

Yes! that threw me, I just finished fhsy and it was fresh in my mind

Jesse De La Rosa

I think that the Groot/racoons situation could have been resolved by having the racoons do an athletics check.

Jess Little

Sorry guys, Crit Confirms is definitely a thing in both Pathfinder 1e and DnD 3.5e. I think y'all owe a correction.

Nifty

Just want to point out that while steeds summoned using find steed can’t speak out loud they always understand one language you speak and can communicate telepathically with the summoner in that language #JusticeForJohn

Chris F

Get Connor (@cdawgva) from trash taste podcast to voice Tucker... I mean I imagine Tucker's voice sounds as heavenly as Connor's.

Brenton

YES CALDWELL! Welcome to your one piece journey! See you in Wano

Noah Jay

The Noahs honor and appreciate your ruling. What happens to one of us, happens to all.

Noah Jay

I thought his 3.5 game was the decade long one of his friends from the east coast? I didn't think that the LA Crew played 3.5. and if they do, it's likely that Brennan removed crit confirms for the exact reason they mention it being anticlimactic

Sukavi

Are y'all familiar with reddit.com/r/dndhorrorstories?

Lucas

I'm so glad Rachel's death lives on. Let's not tell them that the rest of the Animorphs except Cassie die too.

Dylan Irish

I play in a pathfinder 1e campaign and I believe not only do we have to crit confirm above a 10, but I believe our crit confirmation number has to hit our enemy’s AC. Our crit confirm also includes all our bonuses to an attack, too, so it tends to happen a good amount of time(at least for us martial class folk)

K

Gummy Bears one shot

Good Guy Josh (edited)

Comment edits

2026-09-05 07:00 Hell yes One Piece the modern odyssey of fiction welcome to the crew Caldwell so glad you are readings it!
2022-07-27 00:03

Brant Johnson

Fully here for "Tales from the Toxic Table"!!

Dallon Taylor

yall are CRAZY! that sidebar is VALID

Summer Tribe

but crits weren't climactic in 3.5 anyway, they happened more than 2 times as often. With a single feat and a cheap weapon you could crit on an attack with a 30% chance. Shoot they aren't even climactic in 5e, they just HAPPEN, there's no build up.

Summer Tribe

What I'm learning from this comment section (again) is that people writing in have to be clear about what system they're writing about, because nobody likes to hear about a lack of rules understanding

Summer Tribe

what you're saying is nonsense but I'm all for internal consistency depending on the circumstance. If people can't expect anything due to a lack of consistency then their own interpretation of things largely lose meaning, especially in something like a game, your actions must have some degree of reasonable outcome

Garga Lenoir

Nonsense? What didn't you understand?

Caroline Groß

The German version of DnD called DSA (Das schwarze Auge - The black eye) does actually have crit confirmation AND 20 and 1 have switched meanings!! (The lower the role, the better.) The rule system is also way more complicated and bureaucratic - very German. Was laughing the whole time you talked about it.

Nick Lerche

Anyone else missing zac oyamas rotating heroes campaign? Lol love this shid but more campaign

Kreamcheese

Im pretty sure crit confirm was also a thing in pathfinder, which was very popular at the same time as dnd 3.5

Jessica

Listening to Murph sing the Gummy Bears theme song gave me life!! Also hearing the 2nd verse - which I had COMPLETELY forgotten - brought back a rush of memory that was both thrilling and nostalgic. Gummy Bear one-shot in the future, please and thank you!

Bec Robson

Something tells me Caldwell meant superlative lol

Melissa Ryan

The Crit Confirm is from pathfinder. They shouldn’t be doing it in dnd. It was never a mechanic there. 😊

Hardstuck Jett 3

3.5 had a type of crit confirming. If you roll a nat 20, you auto hit. But you have to roll again and match or exceed the targets AC to confirm critical damage, or else you just deal normal damage.

Kidtruck91

For the raccoonicorn thing they would have to summon a celestial. Then make it breed with a raccoon somehow. A wizard did it also does tend to be the reason for alot of beasts.

Matt

I could’ve sworn Caldwell had made many a reference to reading old chapters of one piece prior to this but maybe he’s taking his time or just wanted to and hadn’t gotten around to it until then?