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D&D Court: Soundboard Abuse, Wizard Quizzes, and the Regretful Restaurant Roll-Off (Patreon)

Published:
2023-09-01 03:13:46
Edited:
2023-09-01 03:21:23
Imported:
2026-06
Tags:

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Content

AD-FREE EP FOR $5+ PATRONS!

Dungeon Court is back in session! Join Justices Murphy, Tanner and Axford, as well as Graceless Bailiff Hurwitz, as they convene to pass judgement on your trials at the table!

GET TICKETS TO UPCOMING LIVE SHOWS HERE!!

CREDITS:

Sound Mixing and Editing by Trevor Lyon

Dungeon Court Theme Song by Sam Weiller

Files

Comments

Claire

Exciting! Been hanging out for this

Impish

:O !!!

austinoxner

I was just looking for a late night snack. Thanks.

Claire

1 for cum!!!

Sarah Catherine

There is a Texas Roadhouse 10 minutes away from the Barrymore Venue in Madison, i recommend going bc caldwell would definitely like the flavored lemonade

Savock

Number One

Sarah Catherine

Also for beers, Gary Gygax drank spotted cows in his home town of Lake Geneva Wi. I’d recommend getting one !

Manuel Berringhaus

I love just peeking into the comments before actually listening to the episode proper. (Even when following a given episodes topics or conversations, I almost never get not at least once per episode surprised by a what-the-hell-is-happening-now™ moment - I love it 😅🥰) 👏👏👏

Lorelei and Kyra Newly Weds

I always said number 3's were vomiting. For 2 reasons. 1. It kinda looks like a person grabbing their stomach. And 2. I enjoy throwing up, not in a sexual sense as I'm not looking to throw up. But when I do, I always end up laughing and it doesn't hurt in anyway.

Lindsay R

Jake’s slight humiliation kink is so funny

Joshua Fletcher

Milwaukee recs coming in HOT: Coffee at Stone Creek Breakfast/lunch at Comet Cafe or the Milwaukee public market Drink beer at Lakefront Brewery Grab a case of New Glarus Spotted Cow for the road Drink tiki at Foundation Do the Miller brewery tour or the Harley Davidson museum if you want to be a tourist

Aalexander Knight

They brought up my 'rolling for dinner' blunder again, must I forever bear this cross?!

Andrew Kruck

Soundboards to me seem like more trouble than they’re worth. At least for me, it’s just not enough benefit to have minor sound effects when it’s so easy to generate bad jokes from it. Idk, I’ve tried using Pocket Bard when I DM, and while I love having adjustable intensity background music, whenever I’ve tried to add in the soundboard it’s both too distracting trying to remember what options I have, and too tempting to just break the narrative flow to joke about the sounds. Second case is kinda wild. I’ve never been a fiancé (yet) but even with my own family I would never be so ornery that once we established a way to decide what we’d get for dinner I threw a fit once I lost. I do think that stacking the odds SO much was a bad move. Made it feel like they were almost certain to win and then they lost anyway. Maybe it was about how passionate they were, but for someone who doesn’t roll dice for fun, the fact that you can get a low roll when you have a great shot at something is probably a worse sting than if it was 50/50. The fart riddle is the only other one where I feel like there’s some contention compared to what the justices said, but really the DM just wrote a bad riddle. I understand not wanting to kill the tone of your campaign, and I think that’s something that the justices often miss given that they’re comedians playing with other comedians. Some people really have a low tolerance for goofs, and I think that’s respectable. All that said, god was that a bad riddle to write in this situation. I truly can’t make “a song” fit it as hard as I try, and fart fits like a glove.

Colton Merrifield

At this point, it’s penance to dice christ lol

Erik Farrar

What are little children if not Halflings? Kid gets to re-roll that Nat 1.

Josh Wolff

I'm having that Munch Squad/MBMBAM moment listening to Murph talk about Texas Roadhouse where I would kill a man for those rolls

Gearbox

Cannon dm should have said pc was surprised. That being said, depending on the type of cannon the sound defense doesn't work, some artillery shoots faster than the speed of sound.

Rad lad named Brad

A couple Milwaukee spots: Drinks: Lakefront Brewery Mobcraft Great Lakes Distillery (my personal fav!) Central Waters Dinner: AJ Bombers Elsa's On the Park You can also just bum about at the Milwaukee Public market or 3rd Street Dining Hall

spaceman

me listening to this in my college class: ☹️

Apple Slapple

Love the ep but OH MY GOD is it so difficult to not burst into laughter at work. "I'm One-ing" almost killed me

JigMink

Can confirm Spotted Cow is good as a non-Milwaukeean.

Derek Smith

I apologize for not learning from your mistakes. Forgive me

Katie P.

Let's just appreciate that the "1 of Cum" guys sold out Carnegie Hall

Kyle David Perry

If you have time to check out Safe House while you are in Milwaukee I highly recommend!

Ted Fryar

Oh my gosh, Caldwell at the end “ we already sang. We already sang the song!” Got me good.

Lindsey Lefeber

I hope Emily loves Wisconsin, we're more than happy to share ALL the curds and they are definitely the best! Fun fact: Wisconsin makes some of the most prized cheese in the WORLD (even the French respect it, so that's something) because of our unique terroir. I believe it's because of the sulfur content in our soil. Madison is a great place to explore. State Street is full of fun little shops and restaurants to try. Another "must try" in Wisconsin is an old fashioned, brandy sour is the big thing but I recommend whiskey sweet myself. Also, it's not IN Madison, but House on the Rock is a cool thing to see and nearby. Unfortunately I'm up closer to Green Bay so I don't have any recs more specific than that, but I have some nerds down there I might ask for more since we'll be there for the show!! Our 10 year anniversary is on September 14th, so my husband got us tickets <3

Jeff Miller

I cannot stop imagining walking in on somebody oneing in a toilet tank at a Christmas party. Thanks?

Sarah Catherine

i’m gonna need a mixed bag where the group gets a soundboard to use during a one-shot

Rad lad named Brad

Forgot Blu or The Outsider as cool drink spots as well

Go_Jeronimo

When you're in WI, you guys have to stop at Kwik Trip and Culver's. It's a rite of passage.

køda

6:55 not murph taking a big ole sip of tea while emilys talking!? how the turn tables...

Joe Murphy

This episode made me number 1

Bocks Cliphton

Can't wait to see you guys in Milwaukee! You simply must check out Wizard Works Brewing Company. Its not too far from the Pabst. No food, though, just beer. If you're looking for good food, it really all depends on what you're into - I can help find a place if you'd like. We have a great coffee scene, too. Anodyne Coffee Roasting Co is a favorite of mine.

Doctor Ransom

One for cum, two for poo, three for pee. From now till eternity this is canon for me.

Maiu

For th confession: 2nd son is the DM, 1st is a player

Timothy Hardy

There is technically a cannon silencer. Look up "tank suppressors" on Google They are bigger than the tank itself lol

The Fun Yaunt

I swear I’ve heard the song/fart riddle controversy before… anyone else??

Blubread00

You would in fact actually not here a cannon shot before it hit

David Kuckuck

Shield is triggered by being being hit, not seeing or hearing the attack.

Shotgunbadger

I do have to be insanely pedantic and while I agree with the general ruling you absolutely do not hear canons before they hit, in fact that is why they were so dangerous, it was big masses of troops getting huge balls shot at them from tubes across the field and the only warning they had was the impact and panic they caused.

Maeve Perry

Ok ok ok, I have an answer to the riddle that's much better than song, and maybe almost as good as fart: mindfulness Affects the masses: It's been popularized enough to become a buzzword Whisper among the branches: When doing mindfulness meditations, you become much more aware of your senses, like hearing. With many, face scrutiny: Not only is it harder to practice mindfulness around others, it's also derided for being touted as a cure-all for mental health issues. Alone, I am mastered: Much much easier to practice mindfulness alone. Better idea: have a riddle with multiple correct answers, but there's a different boss depending on the answer. If you say song, it's a Bard, if you say mindfulness or calm, it's a Monk, and if you say fart, it's a Tarrasque.

Becca_rebaker

I don't mind Texas Roadhouse but it is the loudest place I've ever eaten. The music is so loud and only gets louder when someone has a birthday (which they bring a saddle out and sit on?!)

Logan K

Coming to Wisconsin please go to Culvers, Kwik Trip, check out the Third Ward downtown Milwaukee!

Devin Matthias

No matter where you end up visiting in Wisconsin they will have Spotted Cow beer from New Glarus. It's only sold in Wisconsin and is renowned across the globe.

Hector Ortega

The cheese curds and beer at Lakefront Brewery (in Milwaukee) are amazing! Please check it out!

Hector Ortega

Amazing coffee at Pilcrow in Milwaukee too!!

Drew Worth

NADDPOD suburban food chain tour when

Julita

Dar Bar Indian Grill - I just moved away from Minneapolis and I literally drool thinking of this place Hai Hai - Kick ass Vietnamese fusion food, adorable drinks Meseret - Jaw dropping good Ethiopian food. Minnesota is blessed with an awesome Somali/Ethiopian community!

Kim

If you’ve got a couple hours for a stop between Minneapolis and Madison, I’d highly recommend WizardQuest in the Wisconsin Dells, it seems right up your (mostly Caldwell and Emily lbr) alley. Interactive adventure place, fantasy bullshit to to the max with uncanny valley mannequin wizards, fairies, and goblins, tubes and slides, and puzzles galore! Also they have a wizard on the roof.

Matthew Navins

Check out Hacienda Beer Co in Milwaukee- great food and great craft beer

Kyle Corbett

Oh my goodness! I have so many Wisconsin recommendations. I currently live in Milwaukee, I’ll be at the Madison show, and I’m all Wisconsin native. First for Murphs fast food hunger try Culver’s! My favorite brunch spot in Milwaukee is honeypie in bayview! For those that choose to imbibe try some spotted cow or any other local beer from new Gladis sold on in Wisconsin!

GuidingMoonLite

Aside from Spotted Cow, for good beer and battered cheese curds I would recommend Leinenkugel's brewery near Eua Claire, WI

Cheese of the Lake

Check out the speakeasy The Safe House in Milwaukee / you need a password to get in or they make you do something else to get in. Inside there are very good drinks, fun surprises and hidden rooms. Also, there’s a magician somewhere in there.

FiendishNoodles

On the topic of high-status high school farting, some of the football guys would take loud shits in the locker room stalls after P.E. with the doors open, and when you were walking by to get changed, would tease and laugh at you for seeing and hearing them shit.

Laney Bird

Rice n roll in Milwaukee's East side is a great restaurant.

Ebony-Rose Ellis

I can't believe how insane this is and u need to know that this behaviour could only happen in an American highschool

Rachael

In Milwaukee go on the Sprecher Brewery tour! They have awesome beer and sodas!

Audrey Kratz

RE Madison recommendations: Based on our para-social relationship, it seems like you would like the vibe of Williamson (Willy) Street in Madison, Lots of great restaurants, near the lake, pretty area. There's a great microbrewery on that street - Working Draft Beer Company. Also, I'd recommend walking through the capital building on the square. It's beautiful and surrounded by a bunch of great places to eat/walk/see.

The Trashcan Panther

I can’t wait to see you guys in Madison! I recommend getting ice cream at Chocolate Shoppe. Working Draft and Youngblood are really Madison craft breweries. You can get fried cheese curds at almost any restaurant. If you’re going to the Capitol Square get them from The Old Fashioned (and wash them down with a brandy old fashioned). You should also try some fresh, squeaky cheese curds, you can get them at almost any grocery store or gas station. Olbrich Gardens is beautiful and not too far from the Barrymore!

Tyler Board

I’d love a mixed bag where the crew does a chain restaurant tier list/chart. I think that would be pretty fun.

Squib

Well this was a bad episode to listen to while eating

Doug C.

Congrats on the cumming

Samuel Melendez

I’m from chicago but I always take mini vacations to Milwaukee with my girlfriend! SO the ones I see other people saying that I need to second is LAKEFRONT BREWERY plenty of great beer and some simple pub food and curds of course. Someone always say HONEYPIE for brunch, and I absolutely agree. If you’re in a mood for ramen I recommend HUNGRY SUMO! OH for a small bar that specializes in Japanese alcohol, it’s called RED MAPLE and the people who run it are Total Nerds!! They have their collection of Gundams and transformers out, and the bartender had Yugioh on the TV instead of sports! And definitely a quick stop at the Milwaukee Public Market to experience a lot of little businesses in one place. Good to get snacks, a meal, or even souvenirs!

Jasmine Young

Stopped in the middle of listening to order Texas Roadhouse for dinner

Declane Gilhooley

Unsubscribe does 1 in chat for Cum, in fact they talk about cum just as much as you guys. So 1 for cum

Frogndog

Basketball is a notoriously sticky sport

Wolffle

Madison resident here; so excited to see you guys in two weeks! Glass Nickel Pizza is probably my favorite restaurant in town (make sure you get the nickel nuggets), but the Great Dane and Cafe Hollander are fun spots as well! If you guys are looking for fun stuff to do, Escape This is a cute little escape room on the edge of the downtown area (and I know one of the game masters there is a huge fan of yours!). Forgotten Pharaoh and Sherlocked are both super cool and fun rooms :)

Moonlit Ghost

In highschool, a buddy of my farted so bad they had to evacuate the classroom cuz of the smell

The End of Time (AKA Theo the Minotaur)

I’m just imagining a player from the first case doing the trombone sound-byte and the king in-game immediately sentences the royal trombonist to death for interrupting

Matthew James

In regards to Madison recommendations for the live show: - The Atwood right next door is a pretty cozy spot and very convenient! - Young Blood Beer Company was the first place my girlfriend and I went in the area - tons of plants and weird beer names and a banging music playlist! - If you have extra time between shows, Lazy Jane's (breakfast) and Ha Long Bay (Thai+) are normally popular spots that are among my favorite in the city Happy to point you to curds and other dairy goodness too but to be honest everything is solid enough out here, can't go too wrong, especially in the city

Christopher Berge

Milwaukee: Lakefront brewery for beer, cheese curds and fish fry since it'll be a Friday that you're here. It's also just across the river from where you'll be performing at the Pabst.

Star_Drek

MADISON recs: -The Old Fashioned is the classic touristy spot for dinners and cheese curds. Right on the square by the Capitol building -The capitol building is open to the public during the day and I definitely recommend going in there, it’s quite cool to see inside -Olbrich Beer Gardens is awesome for snacks and outdoor beer spot chilling, especially if it’ll be warm -ditto on some Great Dane recommendations too. Also good cheese curds

Parker

2nd for Lakefront!!! We did the tour this weekend and had a blast- food and beer are terrific. Great curds and ranch

Jenna H

Beer wise, people from Wisconsin are going to tell you to drink spotted cow but they're wrong. New glarus's other beers like their farmhouse and their Oktoberfests are way better. I even prefer an original leinenkugel over a spotted cow. The brass ring near the forward stadium in Madison is really good. Food is solid and great beer selection. It's got pool tables!! Can't wait to see you all in Minneapolis!

Jenna H

Seconding glass nickel and great Dane!

Grass

Another weird time to be named Grace

Natalie Wuest

So excited to see you guys in a week, I'll be at the Madison and Milwaukee show!! You should check out the deer district, its the neighborhood around the Fiserv home of the bucks, of course involves beer and curds. In general you wont have a problem finding beer/bars, 7 out of 10 of the drunkest cities in the Us are all in Wisconsin.

Gene Law

Shield only raises AC +5. Player should have asked the DM if there was an attack roll involved. If it was an AoE explosion, Shield wouldn't help.

GhoOooOOOooulia JoOOooolia

Go eat at Monty’s blue plate diner, it’s in Madison right across from the Barrymore and has incredible food and pie!

GhoOooOOOooulia JoOOooolia

And then if you’re up for a bit of exploring in Milwaukee go eat at hacienda and walk the black cat alley. 10/10 for art lovers and tons of cool architecture down there.

Mooncrest

3 is pee, it is known.

Tony Plocido

"Maybe 1 is cum" should be on shirt.

k.allen

To be fair, I do in fact still bookmark lol

Tony Plocido

"Cursed like Murph" is a good shirt idea too

Caddy Wampus

So excited to see y'all in Madison! I'm sure others have recommended the Great Dane. It's a classic. If you're looking for breakfast, Barriques is excellent. I recommend their delightful honey lavender latte. Also explaining the Trinyvale triplets to the friend I'm dragging with me has been quite the task. 💜

tonytheoneandonly

Murphy was right Caldwell was on fire this episode lol

Isaac wainwright

With the quiz, a better way to do it would be answer or roll but it's you have to pick one as your 'Final Answer' and live with the result!

Hunter Wright

A cannon shot would likely be moving faster than the speed of sound. The projectile would literally hit you before you heard it, regardless of your reaction time. Granted I agree with the interpretation. It's a game, human wizards also can't react faster than lightning, but nobody cares that counter spell is a thing.

Bricole

"That was actually the sound of me 1-ing" Dead lol

Nick Lerche

Former Texas Roadhouse Cook here: it's honey cinnamon whipped butter, not cinnamon apple butter. . but still delicious

Nick Lerche

between 250 and 100 m/s (250 m/s is about 820 feet per second

Nick Lerche

speed of sound in dry air at 20 °C = 343 m / s

Jay S

My mind goes to the supreseors the army used for tanks. Keep in mind they were constructed as a community near a training facility complained about the noise, so they're sadly not practical as they're completely static. Still a cool concept even if the shell would hit before you'd hear the sound of it fired lol

Kathryn Martin

I’m glad I’m not that fiancé family or in-laws. Having the odds in her favor as the minority, she only wants the sauce and she didn’t seem happy she got all those advantages! That drives me crazy, I would just be happy my insane request got considered seriously.

Blaize Gordon

Relistening back to this is had an interesting idea on the riddle portion for an NPC, this tree was cursed by the BBEG to know the riddle but not the answer, he was told that he'd know it when he heard it and has been rooted to the spot ever since, this way your players can think on answers that could work and you could go with the best one

Frogndog

Completely forgot that this is the episode that "one is cum, two is poo, three is pee" came from

Kaidan C

Red Robin’s changed their honey mustard and have lowered their entire quality grade accordingly Also the riddle thing is infuriating. Song is objectively more correct, it is indeed mastered alone. ‘Mastering’ a fart? That’s nothing, that’s stupid Nonsense Madness ruled the court this day.

Compound27

"... and we're gunna look like morons" "Murph, you can't be worried about us looking like morons." 🤣