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family guy toon script? (Patreon)

Published:
2022-04-08 23:20:49
Imported:
2026-06

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working on this family guy thing. would love to get some feedback!

Comments

Jakob Kebert

Sounds great! Cant wait to see it

Let's Talk About

It sounds pretty good. I think it'd be interesting if the Peter that holds his arms out for you is drawn mostly normal to the original Peter design as if to show you want to like it again. Or something like that

Let's Talk About

Like he's not totally normal but just enough

0v0nevermore

I was hoping to see some mention of the Evil Monkey when we got transported to Chris' room. Maybe he could be chilling in the corner or in the closet or something? I know that's animation and not script, but still.

0v0nevermore

As for script, I'd like to hear some Peter's rambling about ridiculous times in the past, rather than having it cut short both times. "Like that time i went bowling with Robert Duvall, or that time i voted in Kentucky wearing baseball shorts, or that time...or that time... or that time..." You can get really creative with that!

Adam Secules

I like it man although think it would be cool to see the other characters somehow

Taiwan Prodigy

Yes, bring it on!!!!! Make a sticker of it too, family guy is a classic and deserves to have a little trophy piece🙌🙌🙌 especially if your art style, it would look absolutely phenomenal🙌🙌

lol Mart

Im terrified. I like it

Vampire Laugh

As mentioned by Adam, I wonder if there is any way to incorporate some of the other family members? Like maybe when the viewer goes into the other rooms, it is like Meg's room, etc.? Love the script and can't wait to follow as it progresses. Cheers

Cameron Mark

I agree with the comments about more family members. Maybe a prisoner/corpse Meg in the basement, run's with the show's theme of her neglect.

Dewsef

Let there be a Simpsons thing at the end once they get eaten/whatever and it fades back in to homer getting a text that the deed is done

Micah

Yes, this is good. And the Peters get more mutated the longer this goes on and the Basement Peter Freaks are horribly mutated reflections vaguely resembling Peter, yet still familiar.

Woody Gardner

This sounds amazing, there’s a lot of potential with the body horror that you could use, some peters that look like they come from the movie society would look pretty freaking sweet lois

Christopher Brown

+1 for more characters. Seeing a Stewie that cannot support the weight of his own head would be delightful.

Sandewr_Pally

For the peter mutating i feel like it should offscreen. By this i mean have completely wrong sounds for the movement of the peters. or a distortion of the theme that gets more disturbing with each group of peters. Maybe a small light source that the POV uses.Like a lighter to enhance the reflection of the basement Peter? other than that i cant think of anything else.

Brandon Ruiz

The script is great, I think as the Peter's keep replicating the quality of each Peter should becoming increasingly more degraded, as to reflect how the show is increasingly getting more produced. As if to retain some of the core appeal of the show. Kind of a clone situation where the quality of each clone can't be replicated perfectly so it looks increasingly more horrific.

Alyssa Rae

*shivers* I'll watch again Peter, I promise.

Alyssa Rae

YES!! Rolling around in the background on his deformed huge head struggling to get upright... like a turtle lol

RJ

I like it! Please add more characters like Stewie, Meg, or Herbert lol. Would love to see your vision of them.

Zachary Robin

Add Quagmire in the Basement, perhaps playing with a dead Peter or something

Dofro_Baggins

On the theme of more characters, I can see Lois just sitting at the piano. severely disfigured fingers from playing the piano for what seems to be an eternity, blank stare, singing a slow, hollow, lifeless version of the theme song

Super Scrub

Maybe coming put of Chris's closet have the monkey throw feces at one of the Peters. Also when peters start becoming super grotesque make vaguely look penis shaped

Joshua Marsh

Yeah I love this concept of them getting more and more mutated as they start by begging for your attention, then switch to aggressive and then back to begging you. I like the slightly different vibe of the basement peters, have they come to terms with the truth of family guys popularity or become more delusional compared to the upstairs peters, is my question?

Kyra B

Don’t forget that Meg is a serial killer

KJ

Absolutely terrifying already in my head

Will

Loved it

sporadic eel

Very nice! Please use as many of the cheap and basic sound effects from the show as you can, I think using them to the point of mania and suffocation would give more of a message of how much of a sell out the show is. Also, more characters! Horrible, demented, soul-less characters, whoever you deem worthy. Nice script!

Super Sheep

I think it sounds great! I am a lover of South Park so I couldn't help but think about how much they make fun of Family Guy, even having a whole episode about it. Maybe having a manatee aquarium in the background somewhere with the balls would be a great nod. But I love the horror of it.

Ethan Green

Absolutely love it. very spooky and very relatable

Mars Lowell

I think this works great seeing the commentary of the whole “the show must go on” type mindset that comes with things like family guy or the simpsons. Like the brutal sense of awareness that they know their success has dwindled and like someone earlier mentioned, their attitudes changing and becoming aggressive almost out of frustration to capture what was lost then begging and eventually complacent. I definitely love the horror genre and it’s always done extremely well here.

kanporairten

The time has finally come where Peter couldn't "remember that one time"

Ella Valley

Woah, this was great Papa! always look forward to your darker content and the pace was set wonderfully. I can’t wait!