Chapter 26: Making New Friends and Learning About the World as a Rock?! (Patreon)

Chapter Twenty-Six

Making New Friends and Learning About the World as a Rock?!

Alice did not receive the easy answer she had hoped for.

The faintest frown crept across Kuonrat's face as he looked up at Alice the Rock.

"What... do you mean, Master?" the Priest said. "What about the Dark Mother do you wish to know?"

I guess I'll need to be a little more specific, Alice thought to herself.

"Urd, tell him that I have been asleep for a very... for a very...?" But before Alice could even finish the sentence, a wave of icy cold washed over her rock body. She felt as though she had just stepped onto a landmine.

Because Alice had told Kuonrat and the others that she had witnessed Eva's [Awakening]. That mysterious word seemed to be what had turned Eva into a [Witch], complete with long white hair, glowing red eyes, and a newfound murderous attitude.

All of that happened just three short years ago.

But how long does Urd think I've been asleep?!

Alice had never given her pint-sized priestess a specific number, but when a god tells someone they've been asleep, and that the world has likely forgotten about them because of that sleep, the assumption would probably be hundreds of years.

"G-God?" Urd squeaked as Alice's silence stretched painfully long.

But there's no helping it, Alice thought to herself. She just had to hope Urd did not notice the discrepancy.

"Tell Kuonrat that I have been asleep for... for a long time, that my memories are hazy!" Alice plowed on despite her misgivings. "I want to know what happened after Eva's [Awakening]."

Urd conveyed Alice's Divine Decree, and the man's bushy beard shook with understanding.

"Of course, Master!" He pressed his face reverently into the earth as he spoke. "I was there the day those fools sought to create a [Magi], to continue the cycle of our oppression!"

Alice nodded eagerly, though she had already heard this much from Mittica back on the mountain.

"Our Dark Mother did not return to us as a vessel of The Fates, however. She returned with her bonds broken, with her Fate shattered!"

Urd's eyes widened in astonishment, but Alice simply bit down on her nonexistent lip. Somehow she knew there was a difference between The Fates and Fate, but it seemed like such an obvious thing that she was frightened to ask what.

"There were... There were fools who opposed what our Unbound Queen had become," Kuonrat continued, oblivious to Alice's uncertainty. "I am ashamed to say that fighting soon broke out between mother and daughter, father and son, even brother and sister. One risked death even to venture out to morning prayer at your temple! The Dark Mother left us then, unworthy as we were of her grace. The Counsel and their hounds arrived soon after that."

A wounded look flashed across Kuonrat's face, as if the memory of those days carried with them an almost physical pain.

"So many were killed. So many more chained and taken away. Our temple, the home we had built for your glorious arrival, was reduced to ash. Those that survived fled the mountain and into the valley, resigning themselves once more to the Fates placed upon their shoulders. We were scattered. We were broken... until the Mother's servant visited me!"

Alice found herself practically leaning forward as Kuonrat forgot his wounded misery. Rapture spread across his bearded cheeks as he lifted his face and stared, not at Urd, but at Alice the Rock.

"Favors One Task found me at my lowest! They carried with them the Dark Mother's wisdom!" His voice became thunderous once more, the same zealous shout that had bounced off the cavern walls the night before. "WHAT A GLORIOUS DAY! TO LEARN THAT OUR UNBOUND QUEEN HAD NOT ABANDONED US!"

Urd seemed to hold her breath as Kuonrat continued.

"Favors One Task bid me to find those who had escaped the Inquisition's wrath, to gather up those oppressed and scorned by Fate, and to prepare a sanctuary for them here in Waterhold. All in preparation for the Mother's return, I thought! Never could I have known that it would be You we would welcome here instead!"

And the Priest seemed to abandon all of his earlier decorum. He became the overexcited child once more.

"Is she near?!" Kuonrat asked, practically bouncing where he knelt. "Has the Mother returned to the valley?! Is the Great Upheaval at hand?!"

Alice's own excitement slipped away as Kuonrat turned the spotlight onto her ignorance. She had not learned much from what Kuonrat had said, though she was more than a little curious about Favors One Task. Their unusual name had been glitched out in the system, but they seemed to be running around and doing Eva's bidding. Was Favors One Task another one of Eva's cultists? And this talk about a Great Upheaval...

Not hard to guess what that means, Alice thought to herself. Kuonrat had mentioned shattering Fate's chain at least a dozen times by now. The problem was she had no idea what The Fates were. While she could not be sure, Kuonrat's earlier comment made it sound like the [Magi]... worked with The Fates?

Work for them is probably more accurate, Alice thought to herself. Were the [Magi] some kind of [Super Priests]? But there was that comment about how Eva didn't become a vessel for The Fates...

Kuonrat's excitement slowly chipped away as Alice mused silently on what she had heard.

"A-Apologies!" Kuonrat sputtered, pushing his face back against the earthen floor. "I did not mean to...! I apologize for my presumption, Master Merry Weather! It has simply been... been so long! I did not mean to offend!"

Alice did not understand the man's frightened transformation at first, but then [Geological Memory] brought up Sorin's own deference back on the mountain. She had run out of cursed energy and been unable to answer the [Pyromancer]'s questions. Rather than be annoyed, however, Sorin had immediately apologized.

Because Alice...

I'm the god here, she thought dimly to herself.

She suddenly realized she didn't have to answer any of Kuonrat's questions. She had been approaching this all wrong. This was not a conversation between equals. This was a Master demanding information from Her Servant.

"Tell Kuonrat he has not... not earned that knowledge," Alice said, feeling suddenly bubbly with excitement. Why had it taken her so long to realize this simple truth? She was the god here!

The Priest visibly deflated as Urd shared this unwelcome decree. Urd's words had even been unusually harsh, as though The Girl thought Alice's reluctance to share such knowledge was a punishment.

"Tell Kuonrat he has done well, though," Alice said, wanting to throw the man a bone. He looked to be on the verge of tears. "He has done a good job keeping my cult alive. He has been a very good... a very good [Priest]?"

Urd conveyed Alice's words with none of her confusion, but it suddenly dawned on Alice that Kuonrat was, of course, a [Priest]. But a priest of what? The Fates? Zora?

"Tell me of Zora," Alice said, suddenly eager to learn more about the other gods. The real gods.

Kuonrat's expression darkened as Urd's words tumbled over him. The man's voice became a low, gravelly growl as he bowed his head in reverence and spoke.

"Zora... She continues to neglect these lands purified by the Mother's Kiss. Those who seek Zora's misguided blessing must travel weeks away, and many are sent home from Her sanctuaries without the smallest [Bless] simply because of the supposed taint that clings to them."

Kuonrat lifted his face from the ground, his expression a mask of unbridled disgust.

"I TELL YOU TRUE, MASTER! I wash myself clean of Her influence this day!" His eyes widened almost deliriously as he continued. "I obeyed Favors One Task and pledged myself to that slave of The Fates, but no more! I deny Zora's Truth! I refuse Zora's Truth! I reject Her Truth!"

Alice blinked stupidly as Kuonrat pressed his face into the ground.

"YOU, MASTER MERRY WEATHER! YOUR GLORY WILL BE ALL THAT LEAVES MY LIPS FROM THIS DAY FORTH!" Even Urd seemed to hold her breath as Kuonrat continued. "Grant me your [Divine Truth], and I will share it with the world as no [Priest] has done before!"

Alice gawked at the man's trembling zeal. She could practically feel the determination radiating off his body like the toasty flame of an oven. He was so full of expectation... but expectation for what? Alice's [Divine Truth]?

But there's nothing truthful about me! Alice's newfound determination started to bleed into worry. And did he say Zora was a servant of The Fates?!

She had not heard about [Divine Truth] once! It certainly hadn't shown up anywhere on her [Divine Development] screens.

Is that like... the rules of my religion?

She bit her nonexistent lip as she tried to divine the truth of that unusual phrase. The word itself seemed to hold a certain power, one that made it all too clear Kuonrat was not asking if he could eat meat on Fridays.

As silence filled the cavern like a noxious gas, Kuonrat seemed to falter. His zeal cracked like a dropped plate, and the bushy man started to deflate until he almost looked as small as Urd.

"I mean, if you would... if you would have me... as your [Priest]?" Kuonrat squeaked. Alice's nonexistent mouth hung open, unsure how to respond. "I know I have... have sullied myself with Zora's Truth, but all was done as Favors One Task instructed! They told me...! They told me to!"

Alice was left at a complete loss. Obviously she wanted Kuonrat to be her [Priest], but all this talk about [Divine Truths]... Was this some aspect of [Divine Development] she simply hadn't unlocked yet?

"Urd, tell him I will consider his r-request," Alice said as she retreated from the decision, and she immediately wondered how Urd felt about this whole priest business.

Alice had always considered the child to be her pint-sized priestess. The difference between being a priest and being a [Priest] had never crossed Alice's mind before now.

For that matter, what even is Urd's class?

Kuonrat offered no complaint as Urd conveyed Alice's Divine Decree.

"I... I understand, Master," Kuonrat said weakly. "I will prove myself. However I can, I will prove the strength of my faith."

Alice nodded absentmindedly. She was about to ask another question when a figure appeared at the edge of her [God Sense].

The wrinkled cultist from last night clambered down the tunnel's ladder with some difficulty. At his hip was the same shortsword he had brandished at Kuonrat. Wedged under his arm was a beaten-up wooden box.

"Urd, tell Kuonrat the old man from yesterday is coming down the tunnel."

The Priest immediately shot up from the floor as Urd relayed the comment. Kuonrat stared down the tunnel through the open door nobody had thought to close.

"Pardons, Master," Kuonrat said, bowing low as he hurried out of the cavern and into the tunnel.

Urd and Alice the Rock were left alone. The child's shoulders seemed to sag with relief as quiet took hold around them. Kuonrat shared none of The Girl's comfort, however. Alice watched his face build into a mask of fury as he raced down the tunnel.

Urd said nothing as she bent over and picked up her stuffed rabbit. She looked down at the patchwork doll and waved its stubby little hands in play. Alice did not focus on Urd for long, however.

"Isaak!" Kuonrat was a thunderous storm as he descended on the old man. [God Sense] allowed Alice to hear him as easily as if he were standing right beside her rock body. "Of all the people to disobey me! I told you all that we must maintain our secrecy now more than ever! What were you thinking coming here?!"

Isaak's thin hair was shock white and did little to hide the liver spots on the top of his head. He had a martial face that brought to mind a veteran of many battles. Despite his many wrinkles, he wore leather armor that seemed too large for his age-shrunken body.

"Elder, I am not sure how much life is left in these old bones," Isaak said with only a hint of a smile. "I wished to see our long-awaited god, just in case the night's cold decided to take me."

Alice was not sure why, but she instantly liked the old man. She had always been partial to the liver-spotted oldtimers in her life. She had not forgotten the electricity the man had imbued his sword with either.

"Bring him to me," Alice whispered, pulling on Kuonrat's ear with [Malevolent Whispers]. "I would like to meet this newest member of my flock."

Kuonrat offered no complaint after that. The two cultists marched past Bram's corpse, neither man so much as glancing down or wrinkling their nose at the decay.

Isaak staggered into the cavern after the Priest. He stared at Alice the Rock with misty eyes, seeming almost reluctant to draw nearer at first.

His body trembling either from age or reverence, Isaak lowered himself to the ground. He placed the wooden box down first and then unbuckled his sword, placing both items in front of him as he bowed low in prayer.

"Master Merry Weather, thank you," Isaak said simply. "I did not think I would live to see this day. I am yours. My sword is yours."

Act of faith performed by believer.

Received experience!

Received faith!

Alice felt the pleasant rush of faith fill her rock body. She could not help but wonder, however, what about the man's words had resulted in the warm tickle. It seemed rather inconsistent what earned her a notification of prayer or faith.

"Though meager and mean," Isaak continued, and Alice turned away from the thought, "I bring you this offering, My Master."

And Isaak opened the wooden crate in front of him.

Offering received from a believer.

Received experience!

Received faith!

There were no gems inside. No bits of bread or broken toys. The contents of the chest looked like...

"A basilisk's fang," Isaak said, gently lifting an enormous tooth reverently over his head. "The horn of a chimera. This, Master Merry Weather, is phoenix ash."

One by one, the elderly man took out some part or portion of a monster, holding it over his head as though for Alice's inspection.

"Isaak is a famed adventurer, Master Merry Weather," Kuonrat said as he hovered over the old man like a storm cloud.

"Was an adventurer," Isaak corrected Kuonrat as he closed the lid of the now-empty chest and bowed his head. "My fighting days are long past. But if our Great Revolution is at hand, know that I will die gladly if it means to see our chains broken."

This was not the first time she heard a Great Revolution mentioned. It seemed these cultists were rather eager to see their chains broken, though nobody bothered to mention what that actually meant.

"Oh." The old man's wrinkled face brightened slightly as he stared at Urd. "I thought I recognized you, little one. You're Momma's pup."

Urd's eyes grew wide as she realized Isaak was speaking to her. Not as Alice's spokesperson, but as Urd the Brothel Worker.

"You look... Well, you looked like death before," Isaak said brusquely, and Alice felt a nerve pop in her nonexistent face. "But you look better now. Is that the Master's blessing at work?"

Urd seemed incapable of forming an answer on her own. The child's lips flapped wordlessly, and she turned to Alice the Rock, as if she had forgotten how to speak without Alice's instruction. The panic brought a mischievous smile to Alice's own nonexistent face.

But blessings... I still need to [Bless] Kuonrat, don't I?

The Priest had acquired a moderate curse when he had found her beside Red Shirt's corpse. It was hard to believe all of that had happened less than twenty-four hours before.

And the old man talked about dying from the cold, Alice thought to herself, studying Isaak's many wrinkles. Who knew how much of that had been a joke.

Without delay, Alice focused on Kuonrat. It felt like a long time since she had last used [Bless], but she willed that her shaggy cultist and would-be priest be cleansed of his curse, that he not meet his doom so shortly after entering her flock.

A curse has grown weaker.

And that was all it took for [Bless] to activate. She watched Kuonrat's face transform. His chest swelled wordlessly, and he turned to Alice the Rock, swaying slightly on his feet.

Alice turned her attention then to Isaak, who remained seated on the ground, and willed that he be made hale and hearty, that he have the vigor he once had when he was running around slaying basilisks.

Just like with Kuonrat, Alice felt nothing herself, but she could see a transformation slowly taking over Isaak's wrinkled face, a disbelieving awe as he clenched and unclenched his fists.

Within a heartbeat, both men had their faces pressed against the floor. None of Isaak's playfulness from before remained. None of the almost conversational intrigue had survived Alice's first act of divinity.

"Truly! Truly you will free us from our ill-begotten Fate!" Kuonrat sputtered reverently from the floor, but Alice was distracted by a faint scratch at the edge of her senses.

...please...

...I may be an old man...

...but grant me...

...a glorious...

...and violent death...

New Prayer Received

Petitioner: Isaak Widowluck

Status: Believer (zealous)

Prayer Category: Salvation

Description: Isaak Widowluck wishes to die gloriously in battle.

Alice could hardly believe her nonexistent eyes. Death? Isaak wanted a violent death?

Would you like to accept this prayer? [Y/N]

It was not fear that filled her then but rather anxiety. Once more she was reminded that these followers were nothing like the urchins she had satisfied with bits of bread and broken toys. They were not simply concerned with an empty belly.

As if summoned by the thought, the silence of the cavern was broken by a pronounced rumble.

Both men looked up and stared at Urd, whose eyes had become as large as dinner plates. Her tummy loosed another neglected roar as her face turned as red as a tomato.

Alice smiled.

"Urd, tell them that the Great Upheaval is... is very important." Kuonrat and Isaak's eyes glittered with anticipation as Urd conveyed Alice's Divine Decree. "But it is too soon to discuss this."

The men seemed far less enthused about this part, but Alice did not care. She had to remind herself that they were not equals. She was their god, and they were her servants.

"Tell them that I accept Isaak's offerings, but what I need right now... is a grain offering!"

Urd's stomach offered the room another noisy rumble, so Alice hastily added, "And maybe some soup?"

Time for some soup!

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