Chapter 38: Feeling Like a Real Cult as a Rock?! (Patreon)

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Feeling Like a Real Cult as a Rock?!

Kuonrat returned several hours later. The Priest had left with five of Alice's newly minted faithful, but only three followed after him into the abbey.

Alice needed only to take one look at them to know how well his missionary mission had gone.

"You were attacked, as well, Elder?" Isaak asked, his eyes bulging as they swept over Kuonrat and the others.

Clothes were torn. Lips were swollen. One man clutched his head as blood oozed out between his fingers. Kuonrat's own bruises lay hidden behind the curtain of his black hair, but Alice could see he had not escaped attack.

"The faithless did not care to hear the Good Word," Kuonrat said, waving away Isaak's worry. The Priest's eyes roamed over the abbey, stopping on the blood soaked here and there into the floor. "What has happened here? Word of violence has already spread throughout the town."

"Some fools came," Isaak said, and he leaned closer so that the wary three could not hear him. "The ratman heard them plotting. Came straight to me."

Kuonrat nodded, clearly lost in thought. Alice herself snapped free from her own confusion and blessed all four. The worry on their faces softened as they turned their gaze heavenward.

"That is the Master's blessing!" Kuonrat said, his hands clasped together in prayer. "Your blood has not been shed needlessly!"

And the Priest dismissed the three men who limped deeper into the abbey.

Isaak shared none of Kuonrat's faith-garnered glee.

"More will come," Isaak said. "Revealing the Master to the town so suddenly... Where are Ivor and Daan?"

Kuonrat's good cheer curdled at these words, and they made Alice realize the unusual absence of the hugs. Hadn't Kuonrat said they had left to find protection? Where was it then?!

"I sent them to negotiate with the Puck Boys for fear of this very threat," Kuonrat said with a heavy sigh. "That Fane has always been weak of faith, but I wonder..."

Isaak snorted at that. He spat on the abbey floor, his opinion of this unknown Fane clearly not much.

"I wouldn't be surprised if that weasel was the one who sent these fools," Isaak said, gesturing to the bloodstains. "Drive up whatever extortion they demand of us."

Kuonrat nodded weakly, but then his stare hardened as he seemed to notice, for the first time, the symbol painted across Isaak's leather armor.

"What is that... mark?" Kuonrat asked, squinting.

Alice had watched the whole exchange like an uninvolved outsider, but she felt her nonexistent face fill with red at the Priest's question. Beyond Kuonrat and Isaak's chatter, Urd and the others were drawing the same symbol onto each other's clothing.

"Ahhh, you have not heard then," Isaak said, puffing out his otherwise deflated chest. "The little one received a Divine Decree from God."

The old man jabbed a thumb at the symbol painted sloppily across his armor, his face suddenly radiant with faith.

"This is Her Divine Mark, Elder. All who wear it shall be under Her protection."

Kuonrat gaped at Isaak as if the man had sprouted a second head. He stared, in evident disbelief, at the terrible mistake painted across his chest.

"MAGNIFICENT!" Kuonrat cried, drawing the attention of one and all within the abbey. "It looks like... like...?"

Though Alice's nonexistent face burned bright with embarrassment, she could think of better symbol for the Church of the Merry Weather... than a rock.

Alice had never been much of an artist, so perhaps it was more of a reflection on her lack of imagination, but Alice had guided Urd on how to draw the oval lump that now adorned Isaak's chest.

[Divine Stigmata] had taken care of the rest. Five men and women, not including Urd and the twins, now wore Alice's [Divine Mark] painted onto their clothes. Alice could feel them, though not in the same way she could with Urd and [Divine Communion]. Like a second and third beat of her nonexistent heart, Alice could feel the proof of life that dwelt within her believers.

She had already experimented with giving healing, and the cost seemed to be much the same with [Bless]. Depending on how hard she concentrated, more or less faith would be used, providing weaker or stronger healing. That was all it took. A simple desire for someone to feel better and...

"I feel God's Presence!" Maika shouted, clasping her hands over her head as [Divine Stigmata] sent her several doses of Good Vibrations.

Prayer received from believer.

Received experience!

Received faith!

Her rock core tickled with the pleasant warmth of Maika's adoration, and those inspired by her healing. She was glad it was such an easy skill to use. She hadn't tried the suffering half of the skill yet, and with luck she never would!

"The little miss has already drawn the Master's mark onto your robes," Isaak said, nodding to Urd who dragged behind her a pair of robes that, in her tiny hands, looked more like a bed sheet.

Kuonrat seemed to struggle to speak then. When it was clear words had failed him, he simply tore off his stained robe, revealing his small clothes to the startled Urd who had drawn near.

"Elder!" Isaak said reproachfully, but Kuonrat had no ears for him.

He took the black robes from Urd, marveling at the misshapen rock that had been painted clumsily across its front. It was over his head in the next moment, and another heartbeat was added to Alice's collection.

A figure crept into Alice's [God Sense], and Alice knew a moment's alarm, but it was just a miserable old man, trembling with every step to reach the abbey. When he pushed open the doors, Kuonrat's face became solemn, and the Priest flew to assist him.

"A blessed day, Yew," Kuonrat said, taking the old man's arm and helping him to sit.

Yew did not seem to notice the blood on the floor. He did not seem to notice much. Alice could not be sure the old man was not blind.

"Didn't miss... I must've missed the... I heard there was a service," Yew mumbled, his thoughts scattered with age. "Could use some stew... If there's any left..."

Kuonrat looked down at him and blinked, suddenly confused. He turned away from the man and gestured to Isaak who limped over.

"Is Acolyte Ana within?" Kuonrat asked in a hushed voice as he patted the back of Yew's hand.

Isaak simply shook his head, earning a rich sigh from Kuonrat. Alice had not noticed the pudgy woman's disappearance, but [Geological Memory] revealed it now. She had fled with many others soon after Kuonrat had thrown Zora's icon against the wall.

"She always prepared the stew..." Kuonrat grumbled to himself. "We should... Yes!"

He patted Yew's liver-spotted hand once more and beckoned to the faithful who continued to draw Alice's symbol on whatever they could find.

"Come, all ye faithful, let us prepare a feast on this, Our Master's Day of Return!"

An excited muttering went up amongst the men and the women. Iver and Axel rubbed their stomachs, but Alice's thoughts had turned to a screen she would sooner have forgotten.

Guidance: Some Like It Hot!

Instruction: Make Urd eat spicy food until she vomits within (8) days.

Reward: Maybe you won't die >:D

I really don't want to do that... Alice thought to herself. She could not help but remember the reward for setting up a shrine, however. There had been no mention of [Consecrate Earth] in the task description, just as there was none here now.

Feeling guilty, Alice pulled on Kuonrat's ear with [Malevolent Whisper]. She could not bring herself to have Urd convey this particular Divine Decree.

"Food is good, but we need something... spicy," Alice whispered, and Kuonrat nodded excitedly, turning instantly to Alice the Rock.

"Spicy food! Of course! That makes... Spicy?"

Alice bit on her nonexistent lip. She supposed it wouldn't be too helpful to tell them something like Indian. This world had to have spicy food, though!

"Do you refer to... Castuelí peppers, Master?"

Alice was not sure why, but the question hit her with a physical weight. Sorin the Pyromancer had mentioned Castuel over and over. She had never forgotten the man. [Geological Memory] would not let her forget, but he would have been her first believer. If not for Dale and all that happened afterwards...

"Yes," Alice said, pushing aside the sudden melancholy. She would do something... special for them, though. Sorin and Mittica Goldtooth. Even Petre Bearblood. They would be honored in the Church of the Merry Weather. "I desire Castuelí peppers."

She wasn't sure what Castuel had to do with anything, but the word pepper she understood.

"Of course, of course," Kuonrat said. "Momma should have such stores. I will send Isaak to her at once."

"No, no, no," Alice whispered immediately, earning rich worry from Kuonrat. After the most recent assault, she was in no rush to have her wrinkled swordsman wander off.

Kuonrat's confusion transformed into a baffling comprehension.

"I understand, Master," Kuonrat said. "She wouldn't come until after dark. Word will be sent."

Alice was not sure what that meant, but she was more confused by the Momma name. Hadn't Urd mentioned someone called Momma? Hadn't the brothel she worked at been called Momma's House?

She received no answer as Kuonrat showed Alice's new believers to the abbey's small kitchen. Acolyte Ana may have run off, but she had left the pantries well-stocked. Within no time at all, a hearty meal was prepared, and Alice's new flock was gathered around the table.

I feel like I'm dreaming, Alice said as she studied the dozen people seated at a communal table. All wore her wobbly rock across their chests. Their hands were all clasped together in prayer as Kuonrat led them in thanks. For the first time, Alice felt like an actual god.

But Urd...

The pint-sized priestess had not joined the others at the table. She had a bowl of stew in her hands and was seated well away from them.

"Urd, you should eat with the others," Alice said, sliding in Urd's senses.

The Girl shook slightly and glanced over her shoulder at the table noisy with smacking lips.

"I... I shouldn’t," Urd said, and she seemed to tug unconsciously at the bandages that hid her scales. "It wouldn't be... proper."

Alice felt a little fire fill her nostrils at this. Had Urd heard nothing Alice had said before?

"The Church of the Merry Weather is for everyone," Alice said, and Urd looked down at her feet, ashamed. "Go and sit with the others. Eat with everyone else."

Urd looked as though she was going to argue, but her pint-sized priestess seemed to think better of the insolence. She took her bowl of soup and waddled towards the others, some of whom watched Urd's approach with obvious wariness.

"Here's a sit," Iver said awkwardly, patting a length of bench beside him and Axel. Urd nodded absentmindedly and sat, obviously full of nerves.

With a great reluctance, Urd pulled down her bandages to reveal the scales underneath.

But they were not the scales Alice had seen so many times before.

The whole table seemed to stare with muted fascination at the pleasant sparkle that adorned Urd's scaled face. It was an all too familiar sparkle... and [Geological Memory] brought to mind a small black rock that had shone pleasantly at the bottom of a pond.

Is that... [Glamour]? Alice wondered dimly as she focused on the pleasant sparkles of Urd's scales. She did not seem to notice the fascination her face was inspiring in those around the table. There had been no notification, but had [Divine Communion] finally transferred a skill to Urd?

An unbeliever has been converted.

Received experience!

Received faith!

"Eh?"

Alice blinked stupidly at the notification. Had Urd's pretty sparkles earned her a new follower? But she had thought everyone here already was a believer!

An unbeliever has been converted.

Received experience!

Received faith!

The second notification left her even more confused... but then her thoughts turned to the two men she had set loose into Waterhold. She had commanded them to spread the Good Word, to share the mercy of Alice of the Merry Weather with their families. And then there was Dirt and his threat to bring the whole burrow to her faith.

I wonder who I'm converting... Alice felt giddy with more than just faith. Never mind the table arranged with faithful draped in her colors. This was what being a god was all about. Having other people spread Your Name.

Alice's thoughts were full of rainbows and sunshine as a pair of familiar faces stalked into her [God Sense]. Ivor and Daan looked vaguely anxious, the reason for their concern revealing itself a moment later.

Four thugs marched behind them. They looked so much like Ivor and Daan with their crude and violent mien that Alice thought they all could have been brothers. One among them had a different air about him, however, a sort of wary intelligence that instantly marked him as a leader. The man's left leg was lame as he limped after Ivor and Daan.

"Ivor and Daan have come back," Alice said as the abbey doors were pushed open. "There are other men with them. Violent-looking men."

Urd relayed Alice's words, and Kuonrat and Isaak exchanged a look.

"Excuse me," the Priest said as he rose. Isaak followed after him while the others remained at the table, muttering nervously to one another.

Daan and Ivor seemed particularly relieved as Kuonrat entered the main sanctuary and stomped over to where the thuggish strangers arranged themselves in waiting.

"Good day, Priest," the Limping Man said with a mocking politeness. "You are still a [Priest], no?"

Alice flinched inwardly at the open hostility. She instantly wondered if this would be another battle.

"Careful, Fane," Kuonrat growled, his gnarled knuckles clenched. "You are in God's House."

That seemed to amuse the so-called Fane.

"Are we? We've heard some interesting stories. Never thought I'd see the day daemons find their way into Waterhold."

"I'm warning you," Kuonrat said, and he took a menacing step towards the man. "Master Merry Weather will not be mocked."

"Merry Weather," Fane repeated as if tasting the word. "I know it's been a while since I've been to morning service, but I thought you were one of Zora's."

"I serve a god far older than She," Kuonrat said, and he seemed to lose some of his frustration as his eyes turned to Alice the Rock. "The True God of Waterhold has returned."

Fane nodded absentmindedly.

"I already heard about that," he said. "I also heard about... ratmen? You have ratmen running around the abbey now? I'm a Fate-fearing fellow, Priest, and that worries me."

Alice watched Fade crack his knuckles, and for some reason she was filled with unease.

She had held her silence up until now, but it seemed things were getting out of hand.

It was a costly combination, but Alice balled up cursed energy and used [Haunt Object] on the man's shirt.

Curse Spread: Fade Puck

Severity: Weak

Received experience!

Received cursed energy!

She had the vaguest idea who this was, but the name seemed to settle it. Just like with the other converts, she slipped a desire into Fade's head.

"You will believe in the Master Merry Weather!" Fade's face tightened with a hint of confusion. "You will obey all that you hear!"

And with no further preamble, Alice pulled on Fade's ear with a [Malevolent Whisper].

"I will not be insulted in my own sanctuary!" Alice whispered, earning an immediate jump from Fade. "I am Alice of the Merry Weather, and you will obey my servant!"

Fade spun around as if searching for Alice's voice.

"What is this?" Fade muttered, glowering at Kuonrat. "Some sort of trick?"

Isaak had lurked nearby, though out of sight, but he revealed himself now, a hand on his blade and violence in his eyes.

Fade did not miss the look. He took a step back, revealing once more the limp Alice had seen him struggle with as he entered the sanctuary. A thought burst to life at the sight. The man may be a criminal, but hadn't even Red Shirt said he was a Fate-fearing soul? Hadn't Fade even made a similar claim?

Alice focused on his lame leg, willing it to straighten, willing that it offered him no pain or disability. A confused look spread across the man's face, and Alice pushed her advantage, hoping she still had enough cursed energy.

"It was Fate that brought you to me, Fade Puck," Alice whispered with [Malevolent Whisper]. "So long as you and yours remain true, you will be hale and hearty. Turn against me, however, and your leg will rot!"

Fade's face lost much of its color. He looked down at his lame leg as if in disbelief. He tested it furtively and then glanced at Kuonrat suspiciously.

"Ahh." The Priest's face split into a somewhat malicious grin. "God is strong in this place. Does She speak to you? You should feel honored."

"Peh," Fade spat, though his eyes left Kuonrat and drifted to Alice the Rock.

"Believe!" Alice urged him with another [Serpent's Whisper].

No notification appeared as Fade walked, his limp forgotten, past Kuonrat and towards Alice the Rock. His stare fell onto FOT's limp body propped up against the grudgeheart's rocky core.

The man turned back to Kuonrat with an indecipherable expression. Alice was not particularly sure she liked it.

"You'll have your protection, Priest. I'm a Fate-fearing man, after all."

I set up a Discord and posted some Urd sketches I received from the two artists.

It seems like a lot of you were automatically invited (?) to the server, but here is a link: https://discord.gg/KYcYD3CZZk

You should receive a special role because of Patreon, which will give you access to a private channel to discuss the Patreon chapters (to avoid spoilers for the RR / Scribblehub readers).

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