Drunk fluff (Patreon)

Just something soft because the next blurb will be angsty :D! 

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i.

“C’mon Bug, don’t be difficult.” 

“Don’ call me difficult, baby, just love me.” 

It isn’t often that Y/N has to cater to an inebriated Harry -- he doesn’t let himself get to that point often. He’ll get pleasantly tipsy, bubbly and floaty where he’s dancing and more free with his words but he still has sense enough on how to get home. He could get himself out of his clothes and in bed and tucked in without worry. . .never did he get to the point where Y/N thought if she left him in the bathtub unattended he might drown. 

They had gone to somewhat of a party together with the intent to relax, sure, but Y/N had geared more towards sitting by their fire and chatting up their friends while Harry took toward their cocktail bar with his mates. He’d been stressed recently, what with work and everything on his plate, so she thought he deserved to have a bit of fun. She couldn’t think of the last time that he’d been able to let himself be completely at ease, without the threat of a thought in stress towards anything, from the album to the tour -- he was all giggles and floppy limbs, and she was happy for him. 

At least until she remembered at the end of the night that Mr. Floppy-limbed-giggle-fit was her responsibility to get home. He had found her by the fire about thirty minutes to twelve and slid his arms around her body from behind her, peppering kisses to her cheeks. Y/N craned her neck to look at him and it was the first time she had realized just how far gone he was, his eyes swimming from the alcohol that Y/N could smell on his mouth, “Ooh, hi, drunky.” 

“Hi baby,” he hummed and peppered another kiss to her cheek, “Couldn’t find you for hours.” 

“Yeah?” She reached out to steady him, hearing the few giggles from the others around the fire -- they saw these friends often enough that one would think they had seen him this far gone before, but Y/N herself had only seen him like this a few times and she lived with him, “Think it may be time to go home, and get to sleep.” 

He pouted his mouth, “But the night’s still young, Bunny,” his hands had slid from where they had been on her shoulders, hovering over her breasts but there was no intent behind their placement there, his grip was just loosening, “Don’t you wanna take a shot with me?” 

“So she can carry you home?” Adam snorted, shaking his head as he leaned back in his chair and swirled his own drink around by the nozzle of the bottle, “Think you’ve had enough for about me and a horse, mate. D’ya need help getting him out to the car?” 

Getting him home wasn’t the hard part. After they bid their goodbyes and Y/N got him into the car, it was mostly just her entertaining him by asking about his night, letting him talk in rambles about his time. He’d briefly mentioned how he ran into an old friend but had left it at that before getting distracted by the fast food taco shop that they were about to pass, “Turn! Babe, turn, turn, I’m starving, ‘ve only had those bloody cheese crackers for the last three hours.” 

So they got food, Y/N got him home, he shoveled three tacos down his throat and where Y/N had thought he might have finally been slowing down for the night, he had only been reinvigorated. His second wave of energy hit like a slap to the face, so when Y/N had disappeared for a moment to go get their bed ready for him and some clothes for him to change into, he had decided hide and seek was a lovely game. Not only hide and seek, but ‘hide behind the couch and jump out at Y/N, scare her half to death and nearly break his arm when he lost his balance’ which had added a whole new flavor to it. 

Despite how much her annoyance had begun to grow exponentially, the bursts of his giggles and laughter tickles her ears. He’d been stressed for a long while and it was clear when he was, so to see him so happy felt good, even if it meant attempting to wrangle him in. Hell, she thinks if stomping on her toes made him laugh then she would have been happy to give him steel toed boots and hold her feet out for him -- she just wanted him to have a good time. 

That’s where they were now. Harry was managing to somehow run away from her while she was tripping over her own legs in a desperate attempt to get him undressed. He would give up and just let him sleep in his clothes if not for the fact that he had overenthusiastically jumped into the pool earlier that night, and they were still damp despite how they had toweled him down. If he stayed in the clothes any longer she feared he might get some form of rash from where the clothes had been adhering to his skin. Every time she almost got to him, he would slip from her grasp, wriggle his way from her and bound throughout the flat away from her. 

“I do love you,” she sighed, placing her hand to her forehead, “But you’re driving me nuts, Babe, don’t you wanna get out of those clothes? I know you’re cold.” 

Hair that he would have normally brushed from his face is flopped over his forehead, some in his eye as he dances around the island counter to avoid her, “I’ll only let you take me clothes off, if you promise to make me warm.” 

“Warm cozy pajamas will.” She dodges the connotation behind his words but he doesn’t allow it to. 

“Tha’s not what I meant.” 

“Well, s’what I meant,” she rolled her eyes, pointing in front of her, “Now get your bum over here, or m’going to start being mean.” 

Harry once again pouts, sighing in his defeat and trudging over to where Y/N stood and nearly fell over on his way to her. His brows are furrowed but he lets her take his hand like she’d been holding out to do, “You’re already mean, baby,” he leans forward, lips puckered and Y/N gives him a brief peck, “Just wanted to play.” 

“I know, bug, m’just sleepy, yeah? Aren’t you?” 

After a moment he nods, and allows her to lead him to the bathroom where she had already had clothes chosen for him. She starts on the buttons of his shirt, carefully undoing them with diligent fingers, the wet fabric detaching from his body as he wriggles his shoulders back and forth until it begins to peel from his body. His skin is damp, nipples pebbling from the cool air that brushes past the skin. He shivers, attempting to curl in on himself but she only tuts her tongue and grabs her phone bunches up the Cambridge shirt she’d chosen for him so that she could fit it over his head easily, “Big noggin’,” she teased and Harry whined low in his throat. 

“You’re the one with the big head,” he fired back playfully, shoving his hands through the soft sleeves of the shirt and he places his hands on Y/N shoulders as she works his pants down his legs, “S’a pretty big head though.” 

“Right back at you,” she murmurs, “Are we going pantless or do you want some pajamas? Keep in mind you get sweaty and strip everything off in the middle of the night anyway.” 

“Absolutely no pants,” he murmured decisively, “Take these soggy boxers off me, Babe, I’m goin’ commando.” 

Y/N hums, “Yeah, yeah, that’s fine as long as you keep that dodgy thing away from me.” She referred to his cock as she helped him strip them off, patting his hip. 

“You love my dodgy thing.” 

She lets him lean the weight of his body more firmly against her body again and guides them back into the bedroom. He crawls into bed, arse out and all and Y/N sighs as she finally begins to get ready herself. She thought maybe he would pass out in the time it took her to get prepped for bed, but every time she turned around to check on him, he was propped up on the pillows with a dopey looking smile on his face. He would wave every so often, and she would roll her eyes and wave back. The tacos had helped to sober him considerably, along with the fact that he was coming down from his second wave of energy and slowly sinking into the mattress. 

“Wanna hear somethin’ funny?” He watches her as she tugs a throw blanket loosely over his waist to cover him, while she crawled into bed herself, and she hums to encourage him, “I ran into some ol’ friends while we were there, yeah? And after talkin’ to them for a little while, I realized that they were swingers kinda -- he asked if I’d be interested in fucking his wife in front of him.” 

Y/N’s heart stuttered in a not so good way as she turned to face him, her brows knitted, “Oh?” 

“Mhm, and when I said no, ‘cos I’m with you, they said that you oughta join then, but I --” he hiccups, “I still said no though.” 

The tension that had begun to build in her shoulders began to ease, “Hmm,” she reached down, pulling the throw blanket further up his body, “Not that I mind, but why is that?” 

Harry scoffs, “Is it not obvious? You’re much too jealous to share me,” he began and just before her face turned stony, he continued, “And I think I’d lose my mind if anyone else even thought to touch you. You’re my girl -- can’t believe they thought for a second I would even think about it! Had half the mind to say something rude.” 

Y/N mocks a gasp as she strokes the hair from his face, painting designs along the smooth skin of his cheeks, dancing down his jawline, “No, something rude? You might as well have slapped them!” 

A defeated noise leaves his throat but he melts into her touch, “You’re so mean to me,” he wriggles himself closer, “I love you, jerk.” 

Through a laugh, she lets her eyes flutter shut, “I love you too.”