Craft Post: Information Flow Discrepancies (Patreon)

Let me be clear, the term 'information flow' is something I am borrowing heavily from Kristyn Kathryn Rusch who is an amazing editor. I learnt a LOT from her, when I took their short story anthology program.

The basic idea is that proper information flow in fiction is when you answer a question just before a reader has it. Bad information flow is when you make a reader sit around, wondering about something.

It's more complicated than that though... so let's get into it.

An Example (from my Mentee)

I'm working with a new writer in a writing program, and helping to edit their work. With their permission (without using their name), I can use some of what we're talking about to further explain some thoughts.

So...

In this case, what triggered this thought was a chapter that had a cold open to a new scene. There's a significant timeskip, and we meet the protagonist again in a carriage after a few months, going somewhere.

We don't know where. We do get a lot of good depth, some internal thoughts about things that have changed, description that holds us over for a page and a half...

And then there's the mention of clothing for the 'trip'. A few sentences on the clothing later, we come to the description of what the trip was.

However, by that point, there was a discrepancy already in the information flow, but let's talk about various aspects of this to try to break it down.

The Cold Opening

So, the cold opening of the scene is fine. It's what some might call an 'open loop', creating a small mystery (within the bigger story) of why she's on the carriage, where she's going and the like.

Not a problem and in fact, good writing. Open loops keep readers engaged, and closing the loop (solving the mystery of the trip) gives the reader small pieces of satisfaction.

If you open another loop immediately after or before you close this loop, you keep readers engaged and 'pulled' through the story. This is not tension in itself (between characters, between character and obstacle, etc); but a tension in the story itself.

Small, but there.

So nothing wrong with not giving the reader the information they need (what is going on) by itself...

But the trip (pun intended)

Is where I stumbled. It's possible other readers might stumble earlier, but I do not think so. The writing is good enough that I'm pulled through the story, enjoying the ride; but the mention of the trip without further context reminds me of the open loop.

That's where I grow disgruntled. Not enough to put the book away, of course, but it's annoying that I still don't know what's going on. While I'm in not a white box (see lots of description and scene setting), I am in terms of her mindset and situation.

It's like using the word 'bored'. It's a gut check word, where a reader might go, 'huh. Right, I'm bored too' and put your book down. Dangerous, and in this case, it's a reminder of the open loop.

Solutions (All of them Wrong)

There are a few solutions. Firstly, an author could just avoid opening the loop entirely. You could start with an explanation of the trip, of the musing of what they're being dragged out to do.

"The rumble of the wheels as they carried me to my execution..." never opens a loop about the trip - but does do so about the execution...

You could sprinkle hints through the page and a half, if necessary. "Passing the city of Krisk, on the way to the gallows..."

Or you could, change nothing else but add a single word. "Hunting trip".

You have partially closed the loop, because now we know what they're doing. However, there's a mystery of why they're at this hunting trip, their thoughts of what the trip entails and more that can continue to 'pull' readers through.

All of these are viable solutions, maybe, to the same problem. They're also all wrong for you. The problem was located, the solution is up to the author. I can make suggestions and offer ways of doing it, but a good author will reach for the solution that feels most comfortable for them.

Spotting the issue in your own work

This is a tricky problem to spot. A lot of times, you won't realise you created an information flow issue while writing (the first draft) because you are so embedded in the work.

Some of the solution will just be watching how other authors do it, how they feed you information in drips and drabs so that you never feel out of space.

World building that's expansive enough can help with other aspects, like 'I wonder what kind of clothing he wears' or 'I wonder where that cloth comes from', though there's a danger of over-writing there.

Getting a 2nd pair of eyes will help too. They can tell you when they're uncomfortable, when they've got issues.

And a lot of it will come in edits. When you're reading it over and fixing the book, that's where you might yourself pulling information ahead rather than latter.

As always, feel free to ask questions below.