Ailana’s Journal—2026-05-02 (Patreon)

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GOOD MORNING

It sort of hit me—the week of long days and short nights. Now, it’s time for my post, and I’m not even out of bed yet.

After I got back from the walk on the beach last night, Sasha and Clay were sitting on the stairs drinking iced tea. They waved as I approached and stood to make room for me to pass.

“Josh wants us all to meet in the office around lunchtime tomorrow to debrief the St. Louis job. You want to make a salad or something. Jasmine and I are making sandwiches. Jason is making baked beans. You know… lunch.”

I agreed to make a salad then changed the subject. “So, news? Are you pregnant yet?”

“Maybe. We still need a few more days before the tests can be considered accurate. About one in four or one in five couples get lucky in the first month.”

“I hope you are one of them,” I said.

“Did Geoni or Josh tell you about the caseworker calling?” Clay asked.

“No, what’s up?”

Clay said, “The caseworker told them she wanted to preapprove Josh and Geoni to adopt siblings, just in case. They told her that wasn’t really in their plan, but go ahead and do the paperwork, just in case.”

“Wow,” I replied. “That would be a huge change.”

“Josh just rolls with things like that as if you were just asking what time it is,” Sasha replied.

I nodded. “I know… He’s a rock. And I suppose being approved if you don’t need it is better than needing it and having to wait.”

“That’s true,” Clay replied.

“So, salad for the luncheon,” I said. “I’ll get something together.”

“Good night,” Sasha said as I headed on up to my condo.

So, once I get out of the shower, I need to get myself across the Causeway to Port Isabel and get supplies for a salad. In the meantime, I hope you have a great Saturday morning. See you soon!

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MEETING OF THE MINDS

We are gathered in the AGI/SwimFit office talking about our future as a creative content group in light of our St. Louis trip. We learned a lot. We got a lot right. And we realized a few important things, too.

“In the big AGI picture,” Josh said, “we have to think about how we can travel and do research, yet be ready to pull over and do a photo shoot for Naomi.”

“And do that with your adopted child,” Jason said, “as well as Clay and Sasha’s planned child.”

“Any news on that?” Micah asked.

“Still too soon to call it,” Clay replied.

“Possibly too late to change our minds,” Sasha added.

Josh took us back to the point. “We need to start planning now. If we’re going to pull off the Route 66 trip this summer, we need a legitimate, detailed plan.”

Sasha looked up from where she was taking notes. “So, picture this… We’re driving along taking pictures and notes, and we get a call from Naomi… She’s got a job for us and wants to know where to send the costumes…”

“Wardrobe,” Geoni said, smiling.

“I guess you could call them that,” Sasha laughed. “So, we need everything for a shoot with us. Lights, cameras, backdrops, eyelash glue… We look at a map and say, ‘Send everything to someplace. We’ll wait for it there.’”

That all made sense to me. “So, we need a viable, portable studio that we can pack up and have with us. Viable, meaning it works. The client won’t see any duct tape or rubber bands we used to set it up.”

“It has to pack well,” Jason added. “Clothes racks… Makeup mirrors… stools…”

Josh nodded. “I think we’re on the right train of thought. Let’s start compiling a comprehensive list. We don’t need a dream board. We need a loadout. Jasmine, make a Google folder and a master list. We can populate it as we think of things.”

“Will do,” Jasmine replied.

Clay looked at Josh. “Let’s look into travel options. We need something that will pull an equipment trailer.”

“Come up with some ideas… everyone… RV? Let’s not get caught unprepared.”

Wow… So, yeah, that’s a step up.

NOT OKAY by Emily Amos

My mom has totally lost it. Like maybe she’s literally insane. I’m sure she’s not stable anymore—if she ever was.

I stayed out late so she could get done with her business before I got home, so it was like after ten o’clock when I finally came in. I stayed at work talking to the night manager, then walked home.

I brushed my teeth and pulled the covers out from behind the couch to go to sleep. Then she came out wearing her robe and carrying her iPad.

“Why aren’t you asleep yet? You have school.”

“It’s Friday. I just got home from 7-Eleven.”

“You should be asleep.” She rolled her eyes and huffed.

“I’d have been asleep an hour ago if you weren’t working late again. You said to stay out when you have customers.”

She pointed at me. “You’re so ungrateful. I feed you, you know.”

“You could get a normal job,” I said.

“You don’t even understand. Just mind your own business.”

“You’re lucky,” I said, “that I don’t call my caseworker. If I didn’t care about school, I would.”

“You wouldn’t dare!” She wheeled around and went back to her room, slamming the door.

She knows I would, though. That is, if I didn’t know something better was in the works for me.

But now, for the rest of the afternoon and evening, I need to get out of the apartment. She’s got business coming, so I need to find something to do for the rest of the day.

I’ll swing by work and see if anyone wants to give me their shift. If not, I’ll probably just wander around. Maybe hang out at a park or something.

School’s out in twenty days. Counting down.

GOOD NIGHT

I’m not sure what was more satisfying—lunch with everyone or the outcome of the meeting.

As I stand here thinking back while at the same time thinking forward, I feel myself in flux. The last year has seen growth in our company that I never would have imagined. Yet, the prospect for growth—even more—seems probable.

Josh does not ask for things unless there is a clear need to have them. He wants a plan. He wants ideas for how we can do what we did in St. Louis and do it better.

He pulled me to the side at lunch. “Ailana, let’s be honest. Whatever fruit is borne out of all this modeling work comes from the roots of your past. You’re the voice of experience. You know what we need and what we should be doing. The rest of us are learning from you… So I want to organize things so that AGI realizes its potential. But you have to be the guiding light.”

Okay, thanks for putting the pressure on me!

But really, it’s not pressure as much as it is me accepting the responsibility for casting vision. Admittedly, the realm of the studio, wardrobe, and makeup are new to everyone else. All my years on sets give me perspective and insight.

You can be sure I’ll leave things like trailers and trucks to others. Clay and Micah seem revved up about an RV with a matching cargo trailer they found on Facebook Marketplace.

But as AGI Creative goes forward, I have to accept the role of giving guidance and direction.

But not at the expense of my writing. I spent nearly a decade trying to get that career off the ground.

Jason says not to stress. “You’ll find a way to do both. You’ve got this and I’ve got your back.”

I know he does.

May you find your way to share what you have with those who need it, and may you have someone who stands with you through it all.

Good night.

Be your best you!

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