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the pagemelt CMQ companion reader (Patreon)

Published:
2024-10-01 12:00:09
Imported:
2026-06
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Content

My meatiest Patreon-exclusive video yet, no pun intended 😅! In which I discuss the SMP boycott; my complicated relationship with Casey McQuiston’s work; my deep and abiding love for the Red, White & Royal Blue fandom; how Anthony Bourdain made me less of a puritanical jerk; disappointing tourist experiences; how thoroughly modern art-pilled I am; and how love is two people looking at a third thing.

Media (prominently) referenced

R4A’s website: https://r4acollective.org/

Saint Martin’s Press’s response to R4A: https://static.macmillan.com/static/smp/r4a-response/

Red, White & Royal Blue by Casey McQuiston

One Last Stop by Casey McQuiston

I Kissed Shara Wheeler by Casey McQuiston

The Pairing by Casey McQuiston

Season 1, Episode 17 of A Cook’s Tour: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PJboLGsXnYc

Corey Kerr’s romance novels

Eat Pray Love (2010)

Natalie Wynn (Contrapoints) on Adam Conover: https://youtu.be/K5gI2RicywA?si=_-tXVI6pOIzGG9oa

“Bonneville Salt Flats” from The Anthropocene Reviewed by John Green

Comments

JJ

One of your first TikTok videos I can remember seeing was about RWRB, so this feels very full circle! As always, I appreciate the insightful reviews, and especially how you make connections between different pieces of media. I was just graduating from college in DC and figuring out my own sexuality when I first read RWRB, and the experience of reading it at that moment in my life both inscribed it into my brain forever and made me instinctively cringe away from all the elements of Alex that reminded me too much of myself. It's feeling like it might be time for a re-read, now that I'm living in another city with a fully developed frontal lobe. Anthony Bourdain also has a special place for me - his Parts Unknown episode in Iran was treated kind of like the Superbowl for my proud-and-displaced Iranian American family. His lovable grumpiness somehow made him feel like he was the only white American man we could trust to do the complexities of our home country justice (the opposite, as it happens, of our feelings about Rick Steve's travel show to Iran). As a side note - thank you for the longer-than-normal video! It was the perfect length for me to watch while cooking and eating breakfast this morning. Excellent way to start the day!

Bailey

The joy I felt when this video popped up! Your comments about fandom and RWRB made me pause multiple times because I had to take the time to wonder if that was true for me and the books I love as well. Cheers to making me Think About Things

Meg H.

I always really love your commentary! And I'm so thrilled to watch you expand your scope as a content creator!!!

mall0rie666

new challenge: let Tony rest in peace, libs!

Stephanie H

"does the thing I love even exist in the text itself" This exact question (including fan contributions/transformative works but also other external circumstances or coinciding experiences/interactions) is a complexity that I will forever love about the reading experience. My relationship with a given book/series/author will never exist in a vacuum and while I think it's certainly possible to an extent to separate out the work itself and examine its quality and even to enjoy/love a book just for what it is, that kind of criticism can easily miss or dismiss what makes a given work beloved on a personal level. I adore the fact that while sometimes the things I love exist entirely or partially in the text that sometimes what I love exists outside of the work but simultaneously could not exist without that work as a starting point or even as a foil.

Arti

Pausing when you say you wonder: is this in my head? because wow!! I look back on the fandoms I was apart of and for some of them I can definitely see the love I had was in the text itself, but for other fandoms that love came from the fandom itself, the works and analyses etc. (I also will probably DNF The Pairing. It’s been sitting on my bedside table for weeks and I have no inclination to finish it.)

Claire

so stoked about YouTube video! also we got college art??? this club has everything I love it

JJ

Another great video. You have such a skill for giving a nuanced and broad perspective that feels really fresh, even on media like RWRB that seem kind of “done” (insofar as any story is ever done). I always walk away with new things to think about (third things!). (Also, completely beside the point, but Dutch interiors, what? That was a weird reference that I might have to rabbit hole down, to soothe my nosy, Dutch self)

Lealealea

This is me officially confirming that I am having a very good time too :)

Rhys Tunley

I think if casey mcquiston committed to a full epistolary novel I could really get behind that, the emails in rwrb are the thing that have stuck with me the most and really put those characters behind my ribs. I'd be interested to see what mcquiston would do if they took the limitations of that structure and really ran with it.

Maia Kobabe

Really enjoyed this one! I've been on a very similar (but lesser intensity) journey with McQuiston's work. I listened to RWRB as an audiobook in mid-2019, in the perfect mood and timing to enjoy it. I didn't fall as deeply into the fandom, but the book itself felt designed for fandom. I also struggled to enjoy One Last Stop, for many of the reasons you listed, but thought Shara Wheeler was a very fun, page-turner YA. I was initially excited to see what McQuiston would do next, but as I've watched the reviews come out for The Pairing, I grew more and more certain I would not enjoy this book. After your review, I'm going to skip this one. But I will continue to keep an eye on McQuiston's career because I maintain hope they could still write another book I'll love (or at least enjoy) someday.

Robin

Oh man, I really relate to having all sorts of feelings for RWRB with the rest of McQuiston’s work to date not really hitting the same (I’ve not made it past the first page of The Paring, although, admittedly it’s partly my bias against first person). I almost cried the first time I read the conversation between Alex and Bea about how grief and pain, especially at a young age, can shape someone—and seeing how it’s still possible to be loved by people and open yourself up to that love. Seconding the other comment that I’d love to read an epistolary novel from McQuiston. The emails were also my favorite part of RWRB by far. The growing intimacy! The gorgeous writing! The weird feeling re-reading them and in some ways being similar to the people who read the leaks!

KrustyFrank27

Damn it, Mel, you can’t keep doing this to me! I love your writing style so much! You also give such balanced and nuanced commentary on everything you discuss, and I don’t know how you do it. I think one of my other biggest issues with the Pairing is that some of the major plot points get a lot of narrative weight, but not a lot of in-universe weight. McQuiston keeps building up things like the actual day of the breakup, or Theo’s fears of being considered a nepo baby, and then either completely ignores them by the end, or wraps them up in a wholly unsatisfying way. CMQ is absolutely capable of writing well-rounded and nuanced characters, so chalking everything up to “and then they just got over the nepo baby thing” felt unearned. It might also be a fatality of the split POV, because we never got to see Theo finish up the emotional work for that “breakthrough.” (I also missed having Theo’s POV many times throughout the second half.) I loved seeing your art! It was a surprise and a delight.

Nia

Always excited to get a chewy, nuanced Mel review! This hit a lot of what I didn't enjoy about The Pairing, but hadn't quite articulated. Coincidentally, I just came back from a NYC trip where I went to the MoMA and had a similar experience with Matisse's The Swimming Pool. Looking forward to more longform pieces and having a good time!

Britt

I love the self-indulgence! The longer your videos are, with all your insight and nuance, the more critically I look at the books I read, and how I interact with my world. Thanks for all the work you do creating a space for us!

pagemelt
>>151149705

Yes, you're spot on!!! I feel like the things I was most interested in were those things they were building up that you're talking about, and then they just... never wrote about them...

pagemelt
>>151126348

YES the paratext of reading the emails and delighting in them and also knowing that that's kind of what the people who violated their privacy did! good shit!!!!

pagemelt
>>151057365

thank you for the kind words!!! i also have no clue what "Dutch interiors" is referring to lmao

pagemelt
>>151039622

YES, like, it's just a part of being alive, I think! of COURSE it's all in my head, that is just the way things are experienced! even my relationships and interactions, as you said!! it's beautiful, actually, that the work isn't just the work but the place where our minds meet it!

Rachel Wigginton

I agree that reading RWRB in 2020 was its moment. I enjoyed this video, and I’m excited for the YouTube project!

Kit

I am not a Red White and Royal Blue-head in any sense of the term and this was an incredibly enjoyable piece of criticism (as always!) I was a little shocked when you mentioned that Kit in The Pairing is a cis man, because as a cis man Kit, we are in generally short supply. I’m tempted to read the book based on that alone. It’s fun to have a fictional character share your name! I imagine! That copy of the Anthropocene Reviewed was staring me directly in the eye for the entire time it was onscreen and the catharsis when you picked it up hit like a ton of bricks. Chekhov’s John Green, beautifully done.

Lauren Cole

I also read RWRB at the right time in my life--fall of 2019 when I was trying to figure out my own sexuality. Mine ended up being an aroace awakening, but I related hard to Alex's bi awakening, as well as to his struggle to figure out what he wanted to do with his life/career. More books should explore those unsure post-college years. In regards to real-time pronoun shifting, the Scapegracer trilogy by H.A. Clarke (now August Clarke) uses it, and has other great gender stuff throughout the trilogy!

stummyhort

been saving this one because I knew it'd be a treat (as someone with similar feelings about RWRB) and hooo boy it was! love the way you explained Bourdain and your point with The Anthropocene Reviewed; there's something very satisfying and enriching about hearing you connect the things I love in new and exciting ways <3

Exit Ariel

Thank you so much for articulating why The Pairing was a disappointment. I did love bits and pieces of it -- like Kit's thoughts on loss ("The only way to keep something forever is to lose it and let it haunt you") -- but as a whole it left me so unmoved and I couldn't pinpoint why to my own satisfaction. This analysis was very helpful! I loved your thoughts on RWRB as well; although I'm one of those newbies who stumbled into the fandom after the film came out, I had the same feeling of wondering if it was the book itself or its fandom that I truly loved. (And I LOVED your "potluck" analogy; that's such a perfect way to think about it.) As one of the late arrivals, I'd love to know if you would be willing to point out any particular fics from that pre-film-original-fandom era that you really enjoyed?

pagemelt
>>167254009

Hi hello, thank you for this lovely comment! I am a simple guy and if you ask for fic recs I will give them!! cmere is THE pre-movie author for me, and I love all their stuff, but "The Arrangement" is their novel-length one that I revisit most often. Henry is still a prince, but Alex is a sex worker, and whoops, they fall in love. Also by cmere: "Pitching a Tent" is a super romantic beach camping one-shot. "to the victor, the spoils" and "What, like it's hard?" by railmedaddy are really fun/sexy lawyer AUs. "Screw Your Courage to the Sticking Place" by Celaestis is an angsty AU where Henry tells Alex to leave at Kensington, and Alex goes and marries someone else and has a kid, then they reunite 10 years later. "Someday Soon I'll See You" by MaryaDmitrievnaLikesSundays is my go to for when I want to ugly cry--Alex dies in a gnarly car wreck and everybody deals (or tries to). "all that glitters" by indomitablelove is THE (novel-length) sequel fic to me. And "God Save the Blessed American President Mom" by zipadeea is my forever favorite. Alex gets shot but he lives! Lol. I read it right after the book way back in 2021 and it made me appreciate June (and her perspective on Alex's relationship with their mom) in entirely new ways.