Home
Creators
Search Recent Random
Posts
Search DMs Popular Hash Lookup Tags Random
Importer
Import FAQ
Register Favorites Keys Review DMs Logout
Community
Telegram ThePornDude
Home Creators Posts Import Register Favorites Logout

Downward Dog: Part One Rough Draft (Patreon)

Published:
2024-03-08 15:41:22
Imported:
2026-06
haven't archived this post yet. have a subscription? use the importer!

Downloads

  • Freelancer- Downward Dog Part 1.pdf

Missing 1 file, as this post has not yet been imported.

Poll

Downward Dog: Part One Rough Draft

  • It's Great! Even better than previous stories you've written 19
  • It's Good! Just as good as your previous stories. 13
  • It's fine. Maybe a little worse than your other stories. 0
  • It's bad. This one needs more work before release. 0
  • The writing is good, but I'm just not really interested in the fetishes you wrote about in this one. 0
  • 2024-03-08
  • 32 votes
{'title': 'Downward Dog: Part One Rough Draft ', 'choices': [{'text': "It's Great! Even better than previous stories you've written", 'votes': 19}, {'text': "It's Good! Just as good as your previous stories.", 'votes': 13}, {'text': "It's fine. Maybe a little worse than your other stories.", 'votes': 0}, {'text': "It's bad. This one needs more work before release.", 'votes': 0}, {'text': "The writing is good, but I'm just not really interested in the fetishes you wrote about in this one.", 'votes': 0}], 'closes_at': None, 'created_at': datetime.datetime(2024, 3, 8, 15, 24, 4, tzinfo=datetime.timezone.utc), 'description': None, 'allow_multiple': False, 'total_votes': 32}

Content

Hello!

I ran into a little snag in the middle of drafting my latest freelancer story. It's waaaay too long. Today I realized it was already almost  the length of one of my typical stories and I was just about halfway done. 

Because of this I will be making Downward Dog a two part story, with the first part to be released soon. 

I'm doing something a little different in this story. Instead of a slow breakdown, Jackie plans to overwhelm Heather and make her submit early on. This works because Heather is a naturally weak person who acts like a bitch to hide her insecurities. 

Do these ideas come through in the story?

Does Heather’s quick submission feel natural or contrived?

That scene may need some rewrites to make it feel realistic.

I'm also planning on some expansion of the final sex scene. I've noticed that I have a bad habit of having my submissive go silent in sex scenes, so more dialogue is needed from Heather and Luke. I would also like to have Jackie keep up the pretense that the sex scene is a "training session" for a bit longer. 

I've decided to try out a poll system for draft feedback. I think it might be easier for people to click an answer on a poll rather than type out a response.

That being said I welcome comments as well!

Thanks for reading!

Poll: What is your opinion of this draft?

Comments

No comments found for this post.