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Jake and Amir quiz Jake and Amir (Patreon)

Published:
2022-07-07 04:13:16
Imported:
2026-06
Tags:

Content

How well do we know us? Let's find out!

Comments

Tessa Smith

actually the bitch taco recipe is, double the meat, double the CHEESE, and if you even think twice about eating it you get punched in the back of the head bc ur being a bitch

Blank Check

Just watched the episode and he says shell.

Nick V

in a wood shed is where i spent ALL of my days

Raphael Gordh

In northern Buffalo, born and raised, in a woodshed is where I spent ALL of my days!

Jordan Fields

Q: From the first episode of the finale: Why does Amir trust the advice of Leron's friend Chard? A: Because he has a record label!

Michael Chickless

What is an omelet "Amir Style" Bonus: What is huevos rancheros "Amir Style".

baphoenix

Q:Who does Jake compare him and Cheryl’s boyfriend Todd to when he tries to be her revenge-fudge? A:“Todd’s Dr. Seuss, and Jake’s Shel Silverstein”

Wylie Tharp

q: in the episode Economic Crisis 2, according to amir, how much is a cock-future worth? A: $200, because while sticking a flaming $100 bill in karens ear, amir allegedly says "take this ear candle you bitch, its half the price of a cock-future and unlike you it's garenteed to blow smoke up my ass!"

Grant Brooks Goodman

Q: What does Amir think Jake’s favourite movie is? A: Pride and Prejudice. Episode: Couples Therapist, Pt. 1&2

Michael Arboleda

Q: On Jake and Amir’s Certificate of Marriage, who were written down as the witnesses of the ceremony A: Giancarlos Fiorenti and Jonathan Grimm Episode: “Jake and Amir: Gay Marriage”

Michael Arboleda

Q: When Meryl the intern comes clean with Paul, Will and Amir, what does she ask for permission to do (Hint: Amir replies “denied”) A: She asks for permission to sit on Amirs face Episode: “Jake and Amir: CEO”

Grant Brooks Goodman

Q: How many beers did Amir have? A: 60…. or 12. Episode: Beer

Grant Brooks Goodman

Q: Name some of the alternate fake words in addition to “ace” that Jjkae taught Amir. A: Gullies, tarnacks, spokelins, cinnaducks. Episode: Ace

Joey Vaz

q: what two fruits does Amir demonstrate cutting with a knife he's trying to sell Jake in the episode Knives? a: a fig and a carob

Grant Brooks Goodman

Q: What did Amir do for Labor Day weekend? A: He went camping in the Adirondacks alone, for 3 days, with no food, after taking a $1700 cab to get there. He aspired to catch a fish but after realising there were no lakes, he followed squirrels to club them over the head with a fishing rod. He then took another cab home. Episode: Labor Day

Grant Brooks Goodman

Q: What is the Amir Theory™? A: You’ve gotta have girls on your radar; plant seeds – see what grows. Sometimes it’s a tree, sometimes it’s a lady. Episode: Advice

Grant Brooks Goodman

Q: What Sex and the City character is Amir? A: Charlotte – the cute one. Episode: Test Results

Grant Brooks Goodman

Q: Why doesn’t Amir get as much pussy as Jake? A: Because he doesn’t look good in jeans. Episode: Ace & Jocelyn, Ep. 1

Grant Brooks Goodman

Q: Who was the last person Amir voted for? A: Gerald Ford, in 2006. Episode: Election

Grant Brooks Goodman

Q: What are Amir’s GOAT sandwich ingredients? A: Mustard, provolone, pizza, sprinkles, and frosting. Episode: Sandwich

Lukas Blume

Q: In "March Madness Pt. 6", who was Amir's "write-in" candidate? A: Mickey Mouse

Lukas Blume

Q: In the episode "Ransom", what magazine did Amir fail to find an "N" and an "O" in for his ransom note? A: Guns & Ammo

Connor

Q: What did Amir promise each of the members of the youth group he's supposed chaperone to the Olympics? A: To kiss Michael Phelps Episode: Olympics

Eli Hanft

Amir spent 8 years in the second grade before he turned it on like a light switch, and powered through several grades before opening his stupid little trap and having the hammer come down. What grade did Amir start speaking again? A 6th grade

Justin Bronz

Pretty easy one here but I just wanna hear Amir say it... Q: What is it called when Amir's old man chucks a cast iron skillet at the back of his freaking face? . A: A Grilled Jizz Sandwhich

Max Heckert

In 'Beers,' how many beers did Amir say he drank last night to impress Jake? 60 (Follow up!) How many beers does Jake think Amir should have said to make it believable? 12

Max Heckert

In 'Swine Flu,' what makes Amir suspect he might have contracted H1N1? He may or may not have open-mouth french kissed a pig snout while he sneezed into his mouth

Max Heckert

In 'Guitar Shopping,' what song was Jake playing on acoustic guitar (Bonus points if Amir remembers any of the parody lyrics he was singing over it!) Fast Car by Tracy Chapman *Bonus Lyrics* You've got a fast Jake, Let's get tickets to a baseball game, I wanna eat chicken nuggets, You gotta pay 'cuz I don't have cash, Anything is better than me paying 'cuz I don't have cash, I was pretty fucking clear about that when I said I didn't have cash, And I~~ had a feeling that we were friends, And I~~ just know that we are more than that...

Nicholas

In 'citizen's arrest,' what hashtag does Amir use when posting a picture of Jake's "weed" on Instagram? A: #hashbag

Max Heckert

What's the shortest episode of Jake and Amir in the catalog? Office Painter pt2 (w/ Ben Schwartz) What's the longest episode? The finale, obviously. The longest standalone ep, however, is Donald Trump

Samuel Melendez

Pretty simple but What was the username jake stole from Amir? (Chilldude22) What’s the line that’s repeated in episode 1 and 8 of the girlfriend series? (One minute you’re hear, the next, worm food) What does amir order at McDonald’s? Specifically in The episode commute? (3 20 piece nuggets [for him] and extra 4 piece, and a yogurt parfait on the grill because he likes the way it smells)

Zenith Dreamer

Who does sysops for Mærsk? A: Kobenhavn (From episode "Stock Market")

Christopher Marsh

Q: What is Jake's great great uncle's name, on his mom's side? A: He actually has 2. A shoe salesman Allen G. Summerville, and Frederick B. Krick who died as an infant so Jake's mom never found out about him.

Alex Kennedy

Love this! Can’t believe I remembered Freddie Got Fingered, Larence’s age, and “20 CCs of dialysis administered vaginally.” I’ve spent way too much time watching your videos 😂

Owen

From the episode Bus, after the doors shut on the train, what substance does amir claim is there, and what does he recommend everyone do? Anthrax, and everyone needs to take off their clothes

Rowan Zen Ward

Q: In the episode "Cousin", Linford (Amir's cousin) claims that Amir had survived on a diet solely consisting of chicken nuggets after being abducted from a shopping mall. Between what ages was he missing? A: He was abducted at age six and was returned at the age of eleven - he had forgotten how to speak. (Amir claims they were the best five years of his life)

Owen

In High Five, what song plays after Jake and Amir jump up and high five? Torn by Natalie Imbruglia

Owen

How does Amir enter in the very first March Madness episode? Screaming, with a paper bag over his face

Zach Mills

Q: What is the name of the photographer that took Amir’s headshots? A: Nunya Luis Ricardio Q: Who is not allowed at Amir’s Talent Show? A: Filipinos

Zach Mills

Q: In Pizza, how does Amir know Eli Manning for sure loves Dunkin’ Donuts? A: The proof is in the smile Q: also in Pizza, how many restaurants does Will say Peyton Manning owns? A: 21

Stuart Holmes

In between a rock and a hard cake

Valter

Jake started out weak but went very strong from the halfway point

Penn Moscovitz

Q: In Jake and Amir: Dog, what is the dog’s name? Extra credit - where did Amir get the dog? A: Rotem, got them at a bake sale

Penn Moscovitz

Q: In Jake and Amir: World Cup, after Amir shits his pants, what does Jake say he has on his bracket? A: Spain

Kenz

Q: How many is a believable amount of beers? A: 12

Xiaoxion

In “30th Birthday” Amir receives hate mail from his 6th grade classmates and teacher. What was the name of Amirs teacher? A: MS. Nesbit (Gotta go hard on the MS, she would be pissed at you otherwise)

Nylle (Nile)

Q: What was the name of Amir’s dog? A: Rotem

Nylle (Nile)

Q: The Milkman’s bottle of his least expired milk expired July 13th of what year? A: 1991

Parm

Q: How does amir dress himself in the morning. A: Either a relative will help him, or he will upload a video of himself E. Integrator part 1

Parm

Prompt. Name at least 5 of bens characters Answer: Amir Blumenfeld Jope Scaulbylausis Jim Stanley Carrot Slat Charles Crushtoost Sulu Candles Cherry Dude Ben Schwartz

Kalle Kristensen

When asked by Jake “what has Donald trump contributed to society to make it a better place and made you trust his vision for America” what does Amir answer? A: he makes good deals (actually the best deals)

Kalle Kristensen

In the episode Stock Market what is not the name of one of Amir’s clients: A: Lasagna B: Mickey C: Panini D: Hamburger A: Panini

Stefan Papastefanou

Q: What does Amir say at the beginning of his lunch order at Domino's? A: Bonjour Domino's Q: What does Amir try to order from Domino's? A: Thirty large fromage cheese pizzas Q: What number does Amir make up when Domino's ask for his credit card number? A: Eight. BonusQ: Who calls Amir before he tries to reach Domino's? A: 911 - because it's an emergeny how hungry he is Lunch Meeting

Erik

In "App Ideas," what's #2 on Amir's list of shit that's hard to deal with? Hint: it's "an example of something [he does] all the time." A: Not shaking foreigners and demanding they speak English

Tim

Q: How many times a day does amir take a shit? A: "39 or 40" Q: How often does Jake claim to shit? A: "Once a week" from interrogator part 1 w/ Ben Schwartz

Erik

In "Table Read," what name does Moira Cunt assume when she's trying to mask her true identity? A: Moira Slut

Bridget

Q: How long did Amir hold his breath in Record Breaker? A: 17 minutes

Bridget

Q: In the episode Mother’s Day, Jake wrote an acrostic poem for his mom that Amir fixes for him- what did the “a”s in Laura stand for in Jake’s original poem? A: arms (the whole poem was L for long hair, A for arms, U for umbrella, R for rigatoni, and A for arms again because she has 2)

Daniel S

Q: How much money does Amir have on the bus? (his reasoning for not needing to ride the bus) A: 11 dollars

Daniel S

Q: What is Amir's "goal" at the prom? A: To pour a gallon of milk on "the bitch that refused this hand" while the crowd hopefully chants "moo cow moo" Bonus Q: Why does Amir want to do this? A: Because a few weeks ago, a couple of her friends beat the shit out of him and pushed him into a cow

Todd LerFawndler

Q: What is special about the nuggets that Dan and Anu steal from Amir? A: Dark meat, thigh meat, bought in 1998 wholesale before they were discontinued and aged 13 years to perfection

Urqu-DC

Q: For how long did Doobs audition for in Doobs 2 A: 3 hours Q: What was doobs first name change seen in Doobs 2 A: Penis Anthony Hudson i.e. Huddy

Joe Hartley

Q. Who does Jake nominate for the ice bucket challenge? A. Bradley Cooper from Limitless, Tarvis Baker from Blink 18-2, and Vanilla Bean Ice himself

Diarmuid Burke

Q: In Real Estate, Amir's pitches Mickey to let him move in, claiming "I am quiet, I am clean and just between you and me..." what's the third thing he lists? A: "I cook a mean frittata". Q: In "Costumes Part 3", what does Amir mistake a bull-riding costume for? A: "Fuckin' a cow" costume.

Cole Payne

Q: What mark did Amir get in AP Bio? “Didn’t you take AP Bio?” A: “Yea but I got a ONE”

Cole Payne

Which football team does Amir think won the super bowl in 1989? The Jacksonville Jaguars, who didn’t exist yet

Joe Hartley

Q. In 'Jake's Gift' what is the 'Deluxe Package'? A. Macbook Air, Wine, 2 days in the ring with a former pro, and plane tickets to España

Zane Carnie

Q. In song, what song does Jake listen to? A. Welcome to the black parade (by MCR)

Tyler

Q: In "Video Letter to Mom", which movie does Amir bribe Jake into watching with him? A: Rush Hour 3 Q: In "Voicemail", what is the song that Amir can't remember the name of? A: The Star-Spangled Banner

Jack Harrison

Q. What movie does Amir suggest renting to accompany 'ramming each others farts'. A. Rampart

Ace and Jocelyn

Q: What are the two categories that Amir files his bucket list items into? A: Miscellaneous and Odds & Ends

CactusWrenoir

In Last Night, what does Amir say to the skateboarder? "Let's see your guido dick. I have a big penis you have a string beanus"

Sagie Levy

How old was Jake's tinder match, Lod? She is 16

Sagie Levy

When Amir gives Jake his coupons book, until what age is the book for? "Until you reach the wipe old age of dirty"

Sagie Levy

In 30th birthday, Amir asks Jake "how do you think that makes me feel?" And Jake responds, "I don't know, bad?" How does Amir correct him? "Ehh! Wrong, like shit!"

Sagie Levy

In Seminar, how much does Amir pay Sagie to leave his seminar? 1000$

Col998

A cock meat sandwich is served on what kind of bread? A: Rosemary Focaccia Why do cock meat sandwiches come with a free soda? A: it better be free, I’m eating cockmeat after all.

Mikhail Shevchenko

Q. According to Jake, what item on Amir's bucket list is "Just a mean idea to have" A. You don't owe the world a fucking dime.

Mikhail Shevchenko

Q. Who is the good cop in "Good cop Bad cop" A. Amir Also, at the time of writing this, that video is still on the CH youtube channel.

James

Q. In the episode "Thoughts" what does Amir promise himself before standing up to take a picture of the brown elephant trunk he just gave birth to? A. He promises to stay humble. Q. In the episode "Movie Pitches" what is the slogan for Amir's movie that's also a sweater? A. Look fabulous. Be good. It's Sweater: The Movie. Q. In the episode "Bake Sale" Pat is raising money for his sister's friend, "Starlet," who is sick. What disease does he say she has? A. Gum disease.

Tino

Q: With which family members did Insecure Jake make out (and at what events)? A: - made out with his nephew (at a house party) - kissed his cousin (at Crimson on a Tuesday) - butt-fucked his brother (on a booze cruise) - 69d his dad (at a rave)

Brandon Wallroff

Q: In 'Astrology', Amir is actually a Capricorn; what sign does he think he is? A: Sagittarius

Leo

Q: in staycation pt. 2 Amir spends 9 days in his hotel room “getting the lay of the land”. On the 10th day he leaves and gets “badly, badly lost” for how many moons and how many suns? A: “17 moons, and oddly 21 suns”

hugh michael maguire

Q: What did Amir spend a $100,000 inheritance on? A: 10,000 stars named after Jake.

John Coogan

What were the two items on Amir's bucket list that he had already done? 1. Climb to the top of the Eiffel tower 2. Start punching French women until their mustaches fall off

Luke Teys

Q: What did Amir promise the kids of the youth group in Olympics A: A kiss from Michael Phelps

Urqu-DC

Q:In response to Amir calling himself a Good Guy Greg, what does Jake end up calling him in the reddit pt 2 episode? A: A Scumbag Steve Q:Whose face did Amir Photoshop his face onto, fucking the map of Africa? A:Ron Jeremy

Yes Lad

In Shia, Amir says Shia is a "quadruple threat". What makes up the quadruple threat?

Daniel Sos

In 30th Birthday, Amir feels a certain way after getting a letter from the teacher. Jake initially guesses "bad" but how is Amir actually feeling? A: "Like shit."

Gabriel Perluss

Why is Leeron’s e-zine called Poodle Tar Tar? Answer: ‘Cause he’s raw-dogging the non-readers.

Gabriel Perluss

In Jake and Amir: Compost, Jake asks Amir “what’s 12 minus 3?” What is Amir’s answer? Answer: Gid. G-I-D. Bonus question: In the same episode, Jake bets Amir gid isn’t a word and loses. What is the definition of gid? Answer: It’s a disease found in sheep.

Sean Walsh

In Jake and Amir: Corduroy Pant, Amir asks Jake “Are you mad at me?” What does Jake mishear Amir saying? Answer: “Are you sad are me?”

Sean Walsh

In Jake and Amir: Pizza, how much money does Jake say Peyton Manning got paid for his Papa John ads? A: like a billion dollars

Chris Richard

What is Amir's sandwich order? Bonus for his drink order. A: Jam, Tunafish, cracked pepper, and vinegar on a chocolate croissant. To drink, a keg of what coke is made of.

Michael

where is jake and amir watch

Bring Back Fish Friday

Q: In "Business Ideas", who gives Amir $100,000 to start a business A: his great uncle Gryan

Patrick Keppel

do a J&A watch of the amir psyching himself up to eat a ghost pepper video

Brandon Mead

Q: When it comes to food, what is "Amir Style"? A: A little bit of salt and no salt at all.

Henrik Kursula

Q: What’s everyone’s name according to Amir’s dating coach? A: Amir Blumenfeld

Henrik Kursula

Q: What does every entry in Jake’s diary read as? A: A fucking suicide note

Henrik Kursula

Q: When Amir smashes Jake’s phone screen, he then calls customer support and asks if you could fix it with an app. What reason does he use as an example of why an app might fix it? Not even if you dream big? Because of the _______? A: moon landing.

Pete Estes

Q: In J&A Brown Teepee: What ‘1 item’ does Amir add into his prank to “get the color right?” A: 1 Log (of human shit)

Chris Richard

You should watch Nutrition and Friend Quiz, 2 episodes where Jake, Amir, and Sarah take a quiz on the computer.

MushyOtter

I just enjoy watching you two squirm. Wikileaks and Vest are two good, early insecure Jake episodes. Plus Wikileaks is topical again.

Taylor Clements

In “Taxes” to what foundation did Amir make a charitable donation? A: the Amir Blumenfeld Foundation for Not Giving a Shit”

Archie S

Dude, this comment section is brilliant even before I watch the video haha

Nick Russo

It the episode “Park” Amir asks Jake the question, “There are 10 apples in a bucket & you reach in & take 1 out. How many apples are left in the bucket? Answer: 7, because 2 fall out due to how tightly packed they were In the episode “Parkour” what did Amir’s voicemail to Jake describe? Answer: Swearing on his father’s life, he had witnessed a double murder and was hiding in a garbage can because he saw 2 Puerto Rican deli workers get hacked to bits. His voicemail ended with “i think they see me” and then six minutes of screaming.” What song does Amir sing in “Itinerary”? Answer: Brick - Ben Folds Five Bonus: What does he think it’s about? Answer: A fun vacation What kind of candy bar does Amir eat in “Jacuzzi”? Answer: a whatchamacallit

Ethan Sabourin

Q: In ‘Parkour’ How many consecutive Brazilian waxes does Amir get before he developed such a bad rash that his dad fricken moved? A: 30 Quote: “I developed such a bad rash after my 30th Brazilian in as many days that you know what my dad did?”

Xuul

Q: In TWO separate episodes Amir trys to order a strange food combo from the Deli. What is it? A "Twinkies with a pastrami seasoning

Jordan Somani

In "Karate", what song does Amir sing after stabbing Jake with a knife?

Kenshow Large

Ghost Pepper Challenge Vid: watch?v=Ux2pg9beGq4

SamuelCish

Q: In the realtor episode, their agent Cherry Dude informs the Jake and Amir that the property they're currently touring has no bathrooms, prompting Jake to ask, "How do you shit?" How does Cherry Dude shit? A: "What I do is I take a shot of moisturizer and I get real wide, get over a toilet and go like this, 'hakuna matata OOOO hakuna matata.' Nothing happens... Cut to seventeen hours later, I'm in my bed shitting my balls off."