February Shorts (Part 2) (Patreon)

Hey folks!

Okay. So, thank god, this week was much quieter than the last couple of months - at least, personally. In the wider scheme of things the world is on fire and doom is coming at us from twelve different angles, but none of that kicked in my front door this week, so I'll count it as a win.

Which means I managed to get all of the pending shorts done! I'm very sorry for the wait, but hopefully it'll be a worthwhile read. I'm a little exhausted (as you may be able to tell from the rambly nature of this post) so I'll cut right to the chase. Hope you all find something to enjoy.

-

Request: Advances in supercomputer technology require the use of many humans linked together to provide processing power.

The view of the earth from space was rumoured to be one of the most incredible sights a human could ever hope to see – a glistening jewel of blue and white set against a canvas of the darkest void, speckled with the light of a thousand stars. It was the kind of enchanting beauty that no picture could ever hope to fully capture, that could never be truly experienced while standing with two feet on the ground. Those who got to see that sight, miles and miles beyond the furthest reaches of the planet’s atmosphere, were blessed in a way that few could ever understand.

Unfortunately, Janet Bonk, Triple A agent with a permit to slay, couldn’t enjoy the view – there were a few too many bullets whizzing past her ears for that. That was just the kind of thing you had to deal with when breaking into a supervillain’s orbital lair. Really, it would be worse if someone wasn’t shooting at her – then she wouldn’t feel like she was doing her job.

“Intruder! You are surrounded! Surrender now and you will be given a quick death!”

Good to see that Gatros still wasn’t hiring mooks for their creative capacity – run of the mill thugs were much easier to deal with. They got confused so easily… For instance:

“If you keep shooting those rounds up here,” she called, her back pressed firmly against a solid waste-high crate, “then you’re going to smash through that big expensive window, and we’ll all die slowly in the cold embrace of space!”

There was a slight pause in the gunfire. She could imagine it now – the uniformed minions looking at each other, and at their guns, asking if that was true. It wasn’t, of course – Gatros wasn’t so stupid as to arm his security with weapons that would kill everyone on the station whenever they were fired – but it gave her a delightful opportunity to roll out of cover and shoot down the light fixture hanging over their heads.

“Lights out, lads,” she muttered as silence fell over the station. Her one-liner didn’t immediately invite another hail of bullets, so she figured that was probably the last of them. Good. The dark haired secret agent turned to face her destination, her short ponytail flicking against her catsui. Now she could finally put a stop to Gatros’s plan, once and for all.

The door she’d been fighting her way towards opened easily to her stolen credentials – the agent hid a small smile as she remembered the delightful computer scientist she’d acquired them from – and allowed her into the final airlock. On the other side lay the Siren’s Cry – the advanced computer network that the supervillain had been using to threaten the whole world. It was the key to his entire operation, and with it silenced, his machinations would finally be ended for good.

A little application of C4, and the world was saved. It was nice when the villains kept things simple.

“In the Odyssey, Odysseus plugged his men’s ears with wax to stave off the Siren’s call…” Janet reloaded her gun as the air cycled through the lock. “But I have a different kind of waxing in mind for this creature.”

Yeah, that seemed like a good enough line. The agent nodded to herself, readying up for any defences that the vulnerable computer system might have prepared for an interloper like her. The door hissed, and slid open. Cautiously, she advanced…

… Into an empty, circular chamber. “What the…?”

Her instincts screamed at her, and she jumped backwards, but it was too late – her back hit the metal door that had already slid back into place. She was trapped.

Hidden speakers in the wall crackled to life. “Well well! Welcome, Miss Bonk! I was starting to think you’d run into trouble on the way up. How do you like my little home away from home? I trust you’ve found the Gorgon’s Gaze Station suitably… accommodating?”

“Gatros.” The Agent glared around, searching for the inevitable camera. “I can’t say I thought too much of your welcoming committee. Honestly, they seemed rather dim. But it seems you have me at a disadvantage. Where’s the Siren’s Cry?”

“Haha, straight to the point. How very like you, Miss Bonk. When my informants told me that you were leading the investigation into my little hobby here, I knew I would see something special, but I never dreamed that you would make it so far! Truly, you have more than earned the honour that I have deigned to bestow upon you.”

Janet sighed. Typical megalomaniacal asshole blather. Still, it sounded like he wasn’t looking to kill her, which meant this wouldn’t be a death trap. That was something. “I’m sure it will be charming – but I’m much more interested in super computers, thank you.” Perhaps she could use some of this C4 to break out of here. Risky, yes, but compared to the alternatives it might be preferable…

The speakers crackled with laughter. “I’m very glad to hear it, Miss Bonk! Very glad indeed. Though I think perhaps you’re working under a misapprehension. But if you want a proper introduction to the Siren’s Cry, then who am I to deny you? Here, agent – take a look at my masterpiece.”

Well that sounded bad. And the rumbling that filled the room a second later sounded even worse. The secret agent had to steady herself as the floor shook, and she had a strong sense of moving machinery beyond the walls – before said walls were suddenly pulled away into the floor, revealing a dark glass structure just beyond them. Shocked, she realised that the room she was standing in was turning into a glass cage – and that that glass was all that separated her from the void beyond. The door she’d come in through sank into the floor – or, more accurately, the pod she’d been trapped in rose through the space station and left it behind – until the only metal surface left was the floor beneath her feet.

The world stared down at her – or she, down at it – through the glass dome. “What the hell is this supposed to be? A fancy space oven? You intend to cook me on solar radiation?”

“Oh, perish the thought!” The speakers chuckled. “Though I warn you, if you do anything to break that glass, it will indeed be you who perishes. Right now it not only protects you from the vacuum beyond, but it also shields you from the radiation that would surely rip you apart if you found yourself without it. If you destroyed it, that would be a shame, of course – but not an insurmountable obstacle for my plans.”

“And just what are your plans, Gatros?” Janet growled, certainly not keen on her new situation. She felt like a goldfish in a very dry bowl. “I thought you wanted to show me Siren’s Cry, not give me a nice view of the local vistas.”

“Ah, but Miss Bonk, haven’t you realised? You have found the Siren’s Cry! Indeed, you shot right to it as soon as you got onto my wonderful station – I can only assume that someone gave you access to the top secret information that told you where it is. Did you think they lied to you?”

She had been a very lovely computer scientist, Janet reflected for a moment, before glaring. “I’m not seeing a computer system, Gatros.”

“Ah, that is because you’re looking with the wrong eyes, Agent. Tell me, have you ever heard of Neural Acceleration Hardware?”

Janet’s brow furrowed. “You’re using NAHs? And here I thought there might be levels you wouldn’t sink to, fiend. That technology has been banned for decades!”

“Oho, yes, and I’m sure the space police will be knocking on my door any day now to enforce that ridiculous restriction!” The speakers hissed. “That ban set human development back centuries, Agent! Coward politicians bowing to those weak, whining human rights activists. We should have conquered the stars by now, but no. Hmph.”

There was a click, and the glass bubble around the Agent began to glow with eerie yellow right, almost invisible circuitry running along every pane humming to life.

“I will not stand for it. If humanity is too feeble to do what is necessary, then it falls to me. One man alone to correct his race’s mistake!” Janet could practically picture the villain’s microphone shaking, coated in spittle as he yelled into it like a mad man. “One man, one man alone will ascend to godhood! And I, Miss Bonk, I shall be that man!”

“Well. Good to know you’re insane, I suppose,” The Agent answered neutrally, looking around and trying to work out what the glowing was all about. “But if you think capturing me was the end of this game, I’m afraid you have another thing coming. If my superiors don’t hear back from me within the next few hours, this entire satellite will be blown sky high.”

“Ahh, Agent, I’m afraid that is where you are wrong. Your superiors won’t be doing anything, let alone ordering a missile strike – but do not worry. They will be hearing from you shortly.” There was a sinister kind of breathlessness in his tone. “Now, it’s time I showed you Siren’s Cry in action.”

Janet’s brow furrowed again. What was he up to? She’d best work it out before he surprised her.

NAH technology… Developed in the mid-twenty first century, it was a revolutionary discovery that promised incredible advances in computing technology, which had long since stalled after the failure of Moore’s law. Data storage, computing speed, all kinds of things were possible with it that had never been dreamed of before. The problem was it required the use of living human subjects to function – specifically, their active brains, which were used as a core component of the technology.

A human used as a NAH swiftly had their mind overwritten, leaving them as little more than a component, a simple processor, and little more. Worse, it had quickly been discovered that the increases in speed and power were exponential – the more people woven in as living circuits, the more advanced the resulting computer.

The technology had been outlawed, and thanks to how expensive it was to produce, the NAH era had swiftly faded into obscure history books…

Until now, apparently. But still, this made little sense. Even if Gatros had dragged the technology into the modern day, she’d seen no sign of one in the station – least of all here, where the villain insisted they were. A NAH was not an easy thing to hide – turning someone into one required intensive surgery, and the connections required to hook one up were far from subtle. So what on earth could he mean…?

Well, the villain wasn’t going to leave her in darkness for too long. As the bright glow reached the very top of her bubble, leaving her surrounded by light, the speakers crackled to life again. “Ah, you’re looking confused, Miss Bonk. Perhaps you were expecting one of those old models, the kind that required a surgical suite and a colander for a connector?” Gatros laughed. “As with all the rest, you are still stuck in the past. Don’t you know, Agent, that the future is wireless?!”

Suddenly, the bubble flashed, energy crackling and zapping as it filled the air – before centring in on the only lightning rod in the room – Janet Bonk herself. The Agent had one moment of horror to realise where this was going – before the lines of lightning were zapping in through her ears, and everything went white.

Her mind froze, stopped in place for what seemed like an eternity – unable to think, or sense, her awareness locked in that single moment. And then, darkness – a reboot, as the new update to her software began to install itself, swiftly urging along her conversion to hardware.

Memories played out across her mind’s eye, old files of her childhood opened and scanned for relevance… Before vanishing, dissolving from her memory and from her imagination entirely as they were deemed useless for her new existence. The process continued through her past, pulling up images in a seemingly random order as the energy crackling through her brain found them and erased them. Her childhood. Her education. Her recruitment. Her training. Her many, many missions across the world…

… Deleted. Irrelevant.

Her skills, safely nestled in another region of her grey matter, were next. Her body spasmed, her limbs twitching and moving in as if to fight phantom opponents, but the energy around her held her aloft in the air, and kept her head still as each was steadily purged – functions unneeded for her new purpose.

Finally, the light surged into her last bastion, the very heart of her identity, the physical repository of her soul. Here, where her personality, her identity, her very name itself was stored. And here, where the process was most brutal. The light didn’t simply delete what it found – it overwrote it.

A loading bar spun in her thoughts as they were steadily converted from those of a human woman to a living machine.

Designation: SC Interface 05.

Function: Processing and Interface with Siren’s Cry.

Other files: Irrelevant. Deleted.

By the time the surge stopped, and the yellow light died down, the Agent’s sharp eyes had turned glassy, and her jaw hung slack. Janet Bonk had left the building – now the only name her body responded to was Interface 05.

The speakers chuckled. “Wonderful. I knew you would make the perfect final piece of the Siren’s Cry project, Agent.”

The newly forged NAH didn’t respond – simply staring forward, in the center of her conversion chamber, a small trail of smoke drifting from either ear.

“Ah, apologies. Interface 05! Status?”

Instantly, the former Bonk straightened. “Status of Unit: Fully Operational,” she stated in a robotic monotone.

“Excellent. And your connection to the Siren’s Cry?”

“Functioning at 100%.”

“Perfect. Then I think it’s time for Operation Silence Scream to commence! The last test did exactly as I wanted – now, it’s time to create the greatest computational device in the history of the entire universe, and claim my godhood once and for all!”

Manic laughter broadcast through the speakers all over the station. Interface 05 ignored it – it wasn’t a command, and thus, was irrelevant to her.

But at last, that changed. “Interface 05 – ready the Siren’s Cry. Target: The Earth.”

The circuitry began to glow yellow once again as the drone did exactly as ordered. In moments, the entire station was ready to fire – ready to do to the population of the earth what it had just done to Agent Janet Bonk. “Siren’s Cry is ready.”

“Fire.”

05 looked up at her target, the glistening blue and white jewel hanging over her head – a view that meant absolutely nothing to her now – and obeyed.

-

Request: Kazuma gets dragged into an Axis church, comes out a cute devoted Aqua nun, with exactly the same intelligence and desires as her Goddess.

“Kazuma Kazuma!”

“Yes, I’m Kazuma…” Aqua, blue haired priestess and secret goddess – secret because no one would believe her, not because she actually tried to hide it - was bouncing with excitement. This could only be a bad sign.

“I’m excited!” Yes, yes that had already been covered. And she continued to hammer the point home by shaking the also thoroughly confirmed Kazuma by the collar, his brown haired head bouncing back and forth with each jostle.

Finally, he broke free with a loud cry. “Yes, I can see that!” He grumbled, straightening his tunic. “What the hell is this about?”

“Kazuma, don’t you see?! Look! Look!!!” She grabbed him again despite his best efforts – alas, no matter how long he’d been in this world, he was still a neet at heart, and sometimes you just couldn’t get away from a happy goddess on that kind of constitution. “Do you see it?!”

She was pointing, and grudgingly the adventurer followed her direction. Let’s see, the town they’d arrived in just this morning… Nice looking market… Pretty cathedral over there. And…

“Ohh, a succubus café, I might pay them a visit later-”

“NO!” Suddenly a very upset, very angry Aqua was in his face. “That’s not it, don’t pay attention to that! Don’t you see? That great big beautiful glorious cathedral – it’s an Axis church!”

“Oh.” Kazuma looked again. Ah, just as she said – the symbol engraved over the door was definitely the emblem of the Axis cult. Well how about that.

He spun on his heel and started marching right the hell out of there. “Y’know if we start now we can get back to Axel before Darkness and Megumin finish their quest, maybe we could even help them out a bit with-”

“Don’t just leave!” Aqua was half furious, half on the verge of tears. “Why would you leave when we just got here?! Isn’t this a nice looking place! You’ve been complaining about wanting to rest for the last hour!”

“Yeah, well… You know… No one wants to stay in a town that worships such a useless goddess…”

“KAZUMA!”

Tch. “Fine, fine. We can stay for an evening – but as soon as any of your crazy cultists start shoving those creepy pamphlets at me, we’re leaving.”

“My pamphlets aren’t creepy!” She stamped her foot, cheeks puffy. “And you would be lucky to be a member of my congregation, you heathen!”

“Yeah yeah…” Kazuma sighed, folding his arms behind his head as he begrudgingly headed into town. It was true he wanted to rest, after all. “Look, I’m just saying, no one in their right mind would join the Axis cult. It’s full of weirdos and crazy people. It only makes sense when you consider their goddess.”

“Ugh, Kazuma, you are such a jerk!” The pair began making their way down the street, heading towards the nearest inn to rest for the evening, Aqua still ranting at an apathetic Kazuma all the way. Naturally, neither of them noticed that they were being watched…

…

“Nnngh… What the…?” Kazuma awoke to find himself in an unfortunately kind of familiar position – dressed in his pyjamas, bound head to toe with sturdy rope, and dangling from the ceiling upside down. Don’t ask why this sort of thing was familiar – he’d tell you that it was just the kind of life he led, and that would be kind of true, but that would be omitting a few key facts. (The real reason he’d been in this kind of situation before was Darkness. Neither of them had been pleased about this result. We’ll say nothing more.)

The group of hooded figured surrounding him was new, though – as was the bubbling cauldron beneath him. Neither of those things were welcome additions to the scenario.

“Hey what the hell?!?!” He tried to wriggle free, but the binds were too tough, and he’d refused to invest any of his skill points in rope manipulation out of fear that it’d encourage the party Crusader’s worst instincts. He was stuck.

“Blessed be this congregation, who are gathered here today to preform a most sacred duty…” One of the hooded figures started talking – apparently the one in charge, judging by his tone. And… Hey, wait a minute – was he wearing one of those pope hat things over his cowl?!

“It’s okay to skip obligations if you’d rather stay home today…” The united chant of the rest of the men and women in this dark chamber confirmed it. He was dealing with Axis weirdos. Great.

“Hey, don’t just ignore me!” Kazuma yelled, struggling and kicking in his place. The rope holding him up swayed dangerously – and then someone nailed him with a rock between the eyes. “Gah!”

“Don’t interrupt the sermon, heretic!” An annoyed voice came from the crowd, along with a general chorus of shushing sounds.

The Pope Cloak continued as though he hadn’t said anything, too. “The removal of the sins of a foul unbeliever…”

And the response was once again unified. “It’s fine as long as you did your best…” Was this seriously how Axis Cult meetings went? Well what could you expect of a group that worshiped Aqua…?

“And the induction of a new member of the Axis Cult!” Wait, what were they saying? What was this about induction? They weren’t talking about him, were they?

“Changing your mind when something seems too difficult is the right thing to do!” The group clapped and cheered, as though they’d completed a difficult prayer. Which, given who they were… No, wait, no getting distracted.

“What was all that about?!” Kazuma yelled, going back to struggling. It got him just as far as it had before. Normally he’d be more passive about this kind of thing, just muttering about its stupidity, but these Axis weirdos were freaking nuts, and all desire to be lazy had deserted him.

Finally, the Pope Cloak looked up at him. “Rejoice, unbeliever! For today, the goddess Aqua will bless you, and you can begin dedicating the rest of your life towards making reparations for your foul words towards her wonderous divinity, unburdening your soul of all darkness.”

Kazuma gave the man a flat look. “She’s blessed me fifteen times this week already. The last one turned everything I drink to water in my mouth even if she’s nowhere near me and broke the shower’s hot water last night. It was freezing, and the innkeeper is absolutely going to bill us for breaking it…”

“Damn right I am!” Came a yell from the back of the crowd. Ah, well that’d explain how they’d grabbed him from his bedroom.

“So yeah, don’t need any more of her useless blessings, thanks.”

There was some muttering from the crowd. Quite a lot of it was angry. Ah, right, maybe he’d let his true feelings show a little too freely there…

The sound of wood tapping on stone filled the air, silencing the rumbling. The Pope Cloak guy had gotten a staff out from somewhere, because of course he had. “Truly, your corruption is deep. That is why it is vital we begin your purification now. Faithful! Begin with the cleansing baptism!”

Suddenly, the ropes began to move, and Kazuma found himself being lowered down towards the still bubbling cauldron. “H-hey, wait a sec here! If you drown me she’s just going to be upset that she has to use her resurrection spell again you know!”

Really, it was getting kind of worrying how much they were relying on that spell. How many times had he died now?

“Fear not, non-believer. The holy waters of Aqua will not harm you. They’ll merely help cleanse the corruption from your soul.”

That wasn’t reassuring. And the cauldron was getting awfully close now. He could see the blue waters frothing under the bubbles.

“Look, if you need someone to be your sacrifice for these rituals or whatever, I know a chick who’d be totally into it, ropes and all. And to make it even better, she’s a follower of Eri-Blub!”

Alas, his last-ditch attempt to sell out another member of his party in a desperate attempt to save himself came to naught as the waters closed in over his head – and then shortly there after over the rest of him as well. Before too long the entirety of Kazuma Satou had been submerged, his feet kicking desperately as they went, and the crowd around the caldron waited with baited breath.

Inside said cauldron, Kazuma found the experience oddly hospitable. The water was warm, but not too warm, and the actual cauldron itself was roomy enough that he didn’t feel cramped. Of course, being dangled upside down in bubbling water kind of offset the comfortableness of it all, but he found, to his surprise, that he didn’t seem to mind that too much. Actually, this was kind of…

… Nice?

What he didn’t realise, alas, was that this was an effect of the ‘Holy waters of Aqua’ as they began to work their very real magic upon him. Aqua was, after all, an incredibly powerful goddess when it came to purification – and, as it turned out, those fifteen blessings of hers he was already carrying only intensified their effect. It was doubtful that she’d ever intended the result that was about to happen – but then, that was Aqua. Unintended consequences were kind of her thing.

The water began to froth, bubbling violently around Kazuma, and he felt a strange divine force move through him – not too dissimilar from the feeling of Aqua’s healing magic, but far more intense. He could feel something leaving him, washing away like sand on the shore, dissolving out into the ocean – but he couldn’t put his finger on what before the rope around his feet suddenly pulled him back out again.

He gasped for air as he came out, water pouring off him at very strange angles – and that gasp was echoed throughout the hall as the cult got a good look at him.

“It’s a miracle!”

“The work of Aqua, praise be!”

“Hey, she’s pretty cute!”

Kazuma shook his head, trying to clear it and get rid of the drizzle – succeeding only at about half of both tasks. “What the hell are you guys-… Huh?”

He blinked. That was weird. Why did his voice sound so high? He tried clearing his throat. “Don’t just, ah… Don’t…”

Hm. No. Still sounded weird. And was it just him, or were these ropes feeling awfully tight all of a sudden? Had they shrunk in the wash? He peered upwards to try to see…

… Only for his nightclothes, soaked to the point of utter transparency, to reveal a pair of very surprising additions to her chest. “What the hell?!?”

“Oh blessed be! Our Goddess’s blessing was even stronger than we imagined! The unbeliever has been cleansed of their past, and is now a cute girl!”

The Pope Cloak was correct! Well, kinda. Definitely wrong about the cleansing of the past thing, but the cute girl part, Kazuma couldn’t deny. Her entire body had changed. Obviously, it was a little hard to tell since she was still hanging upside down, but she felt like she’d lost a foot of height (which was dangerous, because if Megumin ever grew to be taller than her the explosion mage would never, ever let it go), and all of that mass had apparently moved to her chest, where she was now in a league with Wiz… What an odd feeling.

Her hair was still short and brown, at least, though it looked a little different on her now feminine features – and a little wiggling against the ropes around her hips revealed that, yep, she’d lost her most valuable treasure…

Damnit, there were plenty of people back home who would have killed for this kind of Isekai, why couldn’t it have happened to one of them instead?

“Well great job you idiots!” She yelled down at the crowd – no longer seeing a point in bargaining since this had already happened. “I bet this is going to cost like a million Eris to fix! Your useless goddess is going to have a field day with this!”

There was a wave of murmurs that rippled through the crowd.

“I think she needs another dip!”

“Yeah, send her in again.”

“Maybe her boobs will get bigger!”

“Perverts!” Kazuma snarled at them – and wow, it felt really weird to be on this side of someone yelling that – but to no avail.

The Pope Cloak nodded thoughtfully. “Indeed. We shall continue the work, and give her the second blessing. Lower the unbeliever!”

“I swear I am going to kill h-Blurble!”

Her head went under once again – though, this time she dipped no further. The familiar rushing feeling flowed through her, rushing like a river from one ear to the other, washing away everything in between…

“Hey, what’s the big idea over there?” Pope Cloak glared towards the ones holding the ropes.

“Sorry sir! The pully’s stuck…”

“Ahh. Alright, pull her back up, see if that fixes it.”

The pully overhead squeaked, and then started turning. Soon, Kazuma once again rose from the depths – and naturally, there was definitely something different about her this time. For one thing, her hair was now blue, dangling from her head in long, silken locks. For another…

“Heeey, guys, can’t we, y’know, talk about this or something? I’m sure we can work this out if we just chat a bit…” It was hard to put a finger on, but there was something new about her attitude. She was definitely talking differently.

But that was ignored. “Don’t worry dear, just a minor glitch in the system, happens all the time. We’ll just give you one last dip to really get all the sins out of your soul, alright?”

“W-W-Wait wait wait, no! No, I don’t wanna!” She squealed and wiggled as the water began to grow closer one last time. “It’s weird and funny and it’s doing something strange to me! Stop! Stop! Ah! Aqua! Aqua, saaave meeeeeebloorble!”

The girl plunged into the cauldron one last time.

…

“Kazuma? Kazuuummaaaa? Kazuma?!” The blue haired goddess wandered the town streets almost frantically, calling this way and that for her missing companion. She’d woken up that morning from the deepest sleep she’d enjoyed for quite some time, only to find that the annoying shut0in had disappeared from their room overnight.

Aqua wasn’t one to react to abandonment well. She was… Shall we say, a little clingy? So, naturally, the first thing she’d done was start searching for the missing man, checking high and low. But there was no sign of him! He’d even left his equipment, that was weird… He had to be around here somewhere, right?

The church was the last place she checked, if only because she knew there was no way he’d ever go in there willingly – he was such a jerk like that. But if he wasn’t in here, then where could he be?

“Kazzzzuuummmaaa? Where are you, you little NEET?”

“Oh, hello there! Can I help you?”

Aqua blinked and turned, coming face to face with an oddly familiar woman in a nun’s habit. Confused, she took a moment to look the lady over, trying to work out where she knew her from. It would be hard to forget a figure like that after all – if it wasn’t that she was wearing an official uniform from the Axis church, she’dve thought her clothing quite scandalous with how it struggled to hold her assets in! And the blue hair was pretty distinctive, surely she’d remember if she knew anyone with that…

Hmmm… Nope! No, the feeling of familiarity passed like an open bottle of wine in Aqua’s presence. Weird.

“Oh, um, I’m looking for my friend. Have you seen him? He’s about yae high, always glaring at things, kind of a lazy bum, probably stared at your chest for like 10 minutes if you spoke to him… Ringing any bells?”

The woman put a finger to her chin, thinking deep. “Oh wow, he kinda sounds like the worst…”

“I know, right?” Aqua might have been a little defensive normally, but right now she was absolutely blaming Kazuma for up and leaving her without even so much as a note. “He’s a total jerk! And I gotta find him.”

“Hmmm.” The nun pursed her lips. “Well, if he’s that bad… Maybe he went home without you? I’d check there.”

“Oh!” The goddess’s eyes widened as the pieces all came together. “I bet that’s it! He couldn’t stand being in a town that worshiped me, so he snuck out as soon as I was asleep! That’s so like him… Argh! I’m gunna go find him right now!” She zoomed away. “Thanks!”

“Blessings of Aqua be with you!” The nun waved, a serene, slightly silly grin on her face as she watched the nice woman run off. Ahh, it felt so nice to help out a fellow cultist…

Smiling happily, Kaza the devoted Axis nun turned back to her church, and got back to her sweeping. After all, she needed this place nice and clean before the party tonight – because oh blessed goddess, she was going to drink herself into oblivion and have herself a damned good time or else! What else would a party be for, after all?

Ah, praise be to Aqua, for blessing her with such a wonderful world~

-

Request: A younger tech-wielding heroine manages to subdue her older nemesis using hypnotic tech she made after digging up as much of the villainess' info as possible. All so she could seduce her after trapping her in a disadvantageous situation.

“Well this is a fine predicament.” Glowbug sighed, testing the vines that held her arms. Nope, no good, they were very secure. So were the ones on her legs. And even if she could break free, she’d just end up plummeting a couple of stories until she hit the floor of the office below. Probably best to just stay tied up for the moment. “Do you always have to be this dramatic about things?”

The green skinned goddess floating in front of her didn’t respond – continuing her work directing the various plants which had overtaken the facility to open up the sealed room ahead of them. Normally, of course, it wouldn’t be accessible without several pass cards, authorisations, and codes… But being a literal nature goddess had given Natura, the green scourge, a few advantages when it came to getting around these hurdles.

Glowbug rolled her eyes beneath her helmet. Typical villain. Even if Natura was one of those ‘green’ villains who probably had a point about saving the environment and all, they could still be a bit one track minded. “I mean, I could probably help you if you’d let me…”

“Yes, I’m sure,” came the goddess’s reply at last – her voice a melodious, if rather sarcastic, divine harmony. “You showed up to help me destroy the Wave Reactor. Those rockets you fired at me were just you accidentally hitting the wrong button on your suit, yes? And the bit where you told me to ‘Stop, fiend’, that was a case of mistaken identity?”

The heroine blushed quietly. “Okay, well, I didn’t mean help you destroy the super expensive private property, no. I meant maybe more of a nature awareness campaign? Maybe some donations to eco charities? I am kind of rich, you know.”

Rebecca Gold was in the fortune five-hundred, even! How else could she fund this wonderful tech suit that gave her all her superheroine abilities?

Alas, the goddess didn’t seem impressed. “I have been around for eons, little one. I know how human minds work. You don’t have an off swich. Sometimes, you have to be stopped from destroying yourselves – or at least from taking the rest of the planet with you. Donating to your silly little charities may make you feel better, but it changes nothing. Direct action is required.”

She glanced back over her shoulder, a dark eyebrow quirking over a red eye as she gave the heroine a scornful look. “Besides, it’s the wealthy ones who cause the most problems. Always has been, always will be.”

“… Well, when you put it like that…”

“Indeed.” Natura turned back to her task. “Now hush, mother has work to do.”

Glowbug clicked her tongue in irritation. Darn. She’d tried. Oh well, no avoiding what came next then…

The goddess and her plants worked quickly, the green easily devouring the lab and weaving thick, strong limbs around the sealed doors. With a wave of her power, they all pulled back as one, and the doors grudgingly slid open. And boldly, the green woman strode into the vault.

Only to pause at the door. Something was off about what she found within. Confused, she looked around the chamber. There was no reactor here – the rumoured device that would consume the world’s oceans to power its cities was nowhere to be seen. Instead, there was just a small room, with a metal chair, and a few strange looking devices she didn’t recognise, but that couldn’t possibly be-

“GlowBlast!” A sudden impact smacked Natura straight in the back, sending her stumbling forward into the chamber – and the doors slammed shut behind her. Instantly, and to her great shock, she felt her connection with the plants outside go silent – somehow completely severed in an instant.

“What is this?!” Immediately, she slammed her shoulder into the door – her divine might should have cracked the metal shell like an egg. But instead, she just earned herself a bruise. “My strength…!”

“Is currently being drained, just like the rest of your powers!” Glowbug’s cheerful face popped up on multipe screens dotted around the chamber. “The room you’re in was constructed from Lethian Alloy. I believe you’re familiar with it? It came up quite a lot in your myths~”

Natura glared at the screens, even as her mind raced. Lethian… “Impossible! That city has been lost for thousands of years!”

The heroine on the screen shrugged – her arms apparently still held by vines that the goddess no longer controlled. “Well, it took me a lot of work to find them, I admit. It was quite an adventure. But hey, it worked out – and now, you’re trapped in a room coated by other-worldly metal, completely cut off from the real source of your powers, the earth itself. Nice, huh?”

The goddess’s red eyed glare only grew more intense. “… So you’ve trapped me, Child.”

“Hey, I’m twenty seven, I’m definitely not-”

“What is it you intend to do?” Natura did not care to listen to the other woman’s blathering. “Seal me away? I’ll break free eventually – nature will not be contained. It will never be tamed by the hand of man!”

Glowbug looked thoughtful as she slowly pulled her way free of the binds Natura had left her in, steadily clambering to safe ground. “Well, we’ll see about that. But as for what I intend to do? Heh heh. You see, Lethia wasn’t the only part of your legends I was interested in…”

As she spoke, the light in the chamber changed, turning a peculiar shade of purple. Instantly, the goddess stumbled, a strange feeling of weakness and lethargy gripping her. “What… What is this?”

“I know it was a long time ago, but do you remember the lord of flame’s banquet? Or maybe that’s a mistranslation…” Glowbug’s voice was still cheerful, like the sound of an irritating mosquito that just wouldn’t go away. “A lot of the stories from that party say you slept through that entire saga, which is weird, don’t you think? Unless, of course, as a nature god, you’re particularly susceptible to the change he made to the sun to announce his arrival. I did some tests, and it turns out your divine frequency is really bad at handling purple light, babe~”

The lord of flame… Ah. Favros. How long had it been since she’d last seen him…? Ah, no, no, her mind was drifting. She couldn’t let herself get distracted. Begrudgingly, she offered the heroine a touch of respect as she stumbled over to the only chair in the room and sat down heavily. “So you’ve found two of my weaknesses. You’ve done your homework, Child.”

“Not a child.” The line was delivered simply and with confidence, but it still made the goddess chuckle. Compared to her, every human alive today was a child, there was no way around it. “And I didn’t stop at two. Do you recognise that scent?”

Scent? Natura’s green brow wrinkled. There was a smell in the air, actually. Familiar, but she couldn’t place it. Slowly, she blinked, her mind feeling oddly hazy. “I… Whatever it is, I feel… very strange.” Her breath was growing heavy, her chest heaving as she started to sweat. “Weakening me this much… Do you intend to kill me, girl?”

That made the hero laugh. “Oh god no! I just need to calm you down, make sure you’re receptive, you know. That scent is Nymph’s delight, by the way. A lot of your worshiper’s notes mention it! Mostly in fertility rituals. I’m guessing you like it. Obviously I had to synthesise that element though, can’t be giving you a real flower in there~”

“Nymph’s… Oh my…” Natura was feeling quite boneless now, her head swimming too thickly to really question what was happening anymore. Instead she just lay back in her chair, letting the strange situation play out. Which meant that when the suction cups popped out of the floor and swung up to latch themselves onto her chest, her reaction speed was far too slow to avoid them.

“And guess what else was mentioned a lot in your fertility rituals! You’re a breast lady, right? I mean, I am too, so I can’t blame you~”

The goddess didn’t answer – instead just moaning as the cups began to suck, leaving her squirming in her seat. Before long, a thick, golden fluid was starting to pump back down the suction cups tubes – a very sweet honey steadily dripping from her nipples.

“Yeah, I thought so. I’m sure that stuff’ll be delish. But hey, it looks like it worked! You seem very disoriented right now.”

Natura couldn’t exactly disagree – her eyes rolling up in her head as pleasure poured through her relaxed body.

Glowbug smiled. “So, time for the finishing touch!” She pressed a button on her wrist – and in the chamber, a helmet slammed down onto the goddess’s head.

“Wh-wha…?” Before the stunned villain’s eyes, purple spirals began to swirl, easily catching her unsteady mind and sucking it into their depths.

“Shhhh,” the heroine outside soothed, her voice echoing in Natura’s ears. “Just lean back, relax, and let the spirals do their work. Trust me, the world doesn’t need an angry nature goddess right now – but I sure as hell need a hot milf girlfriend~”

That wasn’t a very reassuring statement – but all the goddess could do to reply was drool.

…

It was a few hours before the chamber opened up again, and in that time the heroine had gotten most of the green invaders in the building taken care of. It hadn’t been hard once they’d been separated from the goddess commanding them. But Glowbug’s mind had never been on the task at hand – her attention always fully focused on the sealed metal room she’d designed and spent a fortune on making solely to capture and brainwash her longtime supervillain crush. So when the doors finally opened, she was already there, waiting and hoping to see the results. Had it worked? Had Natura resisted her somehow? Was she about to die horrifically painfully for her sins?

“Rebecca!” Green arms wrapped around the heroine and shoved her helmeted face deep into a jade canyon of cleavage.

A good sign.

“N-Natura?”

“Oh, silly…” The goddess’s finger lightly flicked the heroine on the nose. “Haven’t I told you to call me Nat, dear?”

She hadn’t, of course, but she thought she had. It seemed the programming had taken a firm hold!

“O-of course! Sorry, Nat.” The heroine blushed happily. “So, uh… Up for a coffee?”

The former villain smiled. “I’d love one. Oooh, and while we go, I have some nice ideas for some charities you could invest in! There’s a lot doing good work that would really appreciate your help…”

Glowbug smiled as the pair began to walk away. “Sounds good. You know I always love helping you~”

Nature, it seemed, could be tamed after all. But the heroine was still curious to see if the goddess had kept that wildside in the bedroom~

-

Request: Hey, you mention Final Fantasy on the list, I was wondering if that included FFXIV? If it does, I'd love a story involving Y'shtola falling prey to the magic of the Qitana Ravel and being transformed into a bimbofied trading card.

Y’shtola Rhul – otherwise known, for rather personal reasons that she’d really prefer not to go into too deeply, as ‘Master Matoya’ – was a curious soul. It came with being a Scholar, an Archon of Sharlayan, even if neither institution actually existed on this strange world she had found herself on. The urge to explore, to investigate, to understand, it was a natural one to her, and quite an insatiable one. If you presented this woman with a mystery, she would solve it.

Sensibly, of course. She wasn’t the reckless sort – that was something best left to Alisaie and Alphinaud these days. No, the white haired miqo’te was headstrong, certainly, one needed to be to do the kind of work that she did, but she wasn’t stupid about it. She didn’t rush, she didn’t bluster. She engaged with every activity critically, and with careful deliberation, before she decided on her next course of action.

Yes, she’d waited at least three days before she’d decided to explore these ruins beneath Rak’tika on her own. That was plenty of consideration. Not reckless at all, no – and absolutely no one was going to find out about this anyway, so no matter! She was a full grown woman, after all, and a trusted leader of the Night’s Blessed. She could handle a little exploration of an ancient civilisation.

Really, how was she supposed to resist, anyway? As a scholar she thirsted for knowledge, for new experiences and information. Here on the first shard, on this world that lay practically untouched by what she knew, it was like being offered a banquet and having no idea where to begin eating. There was so much to learn, so much to s- well, not see, exactly, but experience.

Of course the seriousness of her situation, of the problems faced not just by the Scions, but by all the peoples of the first shard, those came first. Obviously. She was not a callous woman, by any means. Sardonic, perhaps, but never callous. But no matter how hard she and the others worked, there was a limit to what they could accomplish before the Warrior of Light arrived. The plans that had been laid to push back the sin eater menace and put this world to right depended quite heavily on them – or so she had been told. And honestly, it did sound rather like them.

So yes, in the meantime, she intended to learn as much as she could about the first shard, its peoples, and its history. Which led her here, to the ruins of Ronka, a civilisation which had fallen some time ago, with many mysteries lurking in its depths. There were many legends about the powers of the Ronka woven throughout this world – and that was a power she would examine for herself. It might well be vital in the days to come.

Of course, first she’d had to get around the guardians of the ruins – a tribe of Viera who had most aggressively refuted to her attempts to engage them diplomatically – but thankfully she had managed to navigate her way around them thanks to her keen aether sense, and a few tricks she’d picked up from Thancred. She’d sneak out the same way once she was done – they’d never even know she was here.

The old stone steps cracked and crumbled a little as she descended into the dark depths, but her footing was confident and secure. Her staff was secure on her back, ready to aid her if trouble arose, and her black dress – one she’d adopted after becoming ‘Matoya’ in tribute to her mentor, though she’d never actually admit that to the woman – was well warded against potential attack. Y’shtola had led many expeditions of ancient ruins in her time, and even though all of those had been back on the source, this felt no different. The warm rush of stale air as she broke the seal on the door, the trails of dust she disturbed as she stepped past it… Yes, this was all very familiar.

Unfortunately, that familiarity came with false confidence. The Archon was careful, but perhaps not as cautious as she should have been. And the first warning she got of her mistake was the feeling of a stone tile, one that looked just like all the rest, sinking down with a ‘click’ under her foot.

“Oh damnit.” The curse came out like a sigh as the stone corridor around her began to rumble. Quickly, the white haired miqo’te reached for her staff to protect herself from whatever trap she’d triggered, but before she could bring it to bear giant yellow eyes shone brightly in the darkness before her, and she felt an unfamiliar spell wrap around her aether, dragging her into a suddenly formed portal and spiriting her away.

…

When her eyes opened again, she found herself in another room – still part of the same ruins, she was relieved to sense, but not one she was familiar with. She was probably deeper in the complex. Not… great, but if she could find a way out of here, technically this would have saved her some time.

First, though, she’d have to deal with the large animated statue staring at her – its large yellow eyes all too familiar to the catgirl. She assessed her situation quickly. She’d seen a few statues of this thing, or something similar, throughout the ruins that she’d already explored, so it made sense that this was some kind of guardian entity. If so, then dealing with it now would hopefully make the ruins much safer to explore…

It had other ideas in mind, though.

“Intruder, thou hath trespassed here

You threaten all that we hold dear

You’ve earned the fate I now reveal

As now your soul I shall enseal!”

Its voice boomed through the dusty room, and Y’shtola could feel it starting to gather aether for its next spell – this ‘fate’ it meant to inflict on her, no doubt.

“Wait!” The Archon raised her hands in surrender. “Please – I am sorry for trespassing here, but I meant no offense. I simply wished to learn more of your people. I mean you no harm!”

Hopefully this creature could be reasoned with…

“These words of sorrow you would use

But all you give is poor excuse

If learning of Ronka is your goal

Then you shall do so with your soul.”

But alas, it seemed it was quite set on its path. The miqo’te grit her teeth, pale eyes flashing. Right then. If it wanted a fight, then so be it! She snatched up her staff and began to gather power…

Unfortunately, she underestimated the guardian’s speed. Before she could muster up a spell, the giant statue’s mouth opened, and a deluge of thick black mist came pouring out, swallowing the caster up before she could summon a defence. Immediately she could feel its power working against her, its cursed aether seeping into her skin. She didn’t even have time to curse before her form dwindled down, and then in a burst of mana…

Poof!

Where Y’shtola Rhul had been standing was a card, no thicker than a sheet of construction paper. It was about as tall as the miqo’te had been, perhaps a bit taller, and about half her width again lengthways. On its face was a frozen image of the Archon – not concerned and battle ready, as she had been before she disappeared, but stood in a more casual, confident pose, her arms folded across her chest, her staff still on her back, visible over her shoulder. She stared out from the card with knowing grey eyes and a small, satisfied grin… A picture, perhaps, that presented the essence of her very soul, instead of her physical form.

The card floated, hovering in the air, its edges glowing slightly in the low light as the dark mist began to clear. It was a very strange experience for the scholar trapped within it. Y’shtola had never brooked being called a flat character, but now she was outright two dimensional! The fact that she couldn’t move didn’t bother her as much as she would have expected – indeed, it was rather hard to concentrate properly on her perilous position right now. Her thoughts and attempts to focus kept slipping through her mental fingers, falling into stable old patterns instead of racing to find her an escape. Part of the enchantment, she realised dimly, as she felt her mind start to lull into a blissful emptiness behind her frozen smile. Another way of keeping her sealed away…

She did her best to resist the luring pull of thoughtless stasis, hoping that if she could last long enough she’d figure out a way of escaping from these binds. But the guardian wasn’t done with her yet.

“These chains of ancient Ronka might will hold you for a time

But a simple sentence of stasis spent will not address your crime.

You came to take our treasured worth, so further now we’ll bind

The secrets stolen, and much more, we’ll sup right from your mind.”

It was hard to work out what the creature was saying with a half-dazed head… But it grew harder still, Y’shtola found, as the card she was trapped in began to glow with bright pink light.

The image on the front of the card began to change, the pink magic working swiftly. First, her outfit, her rather distinctive but practical black dress… Became much less practical, and involved much less dress. The neckline that had exposed a bit of her cleavage expanded outwards, until it left even her shoulders completely bare, her sleeves separating out into separate garments, now fur-lined fishnets that extended all the way down to her wrists. As for the dress itself, it shortened, shrinking up her legs, stopping just over her knees – at least at the front. At the sides, deep Vs cut up even further, not resting until they reached her hips, giving plenty of space for her heels to move. More fishnets wove themselves around her now mostly bare legs, stretching down to her shoes, which turned into pointed heels. In moments, her respectful, practical dress had turned into something a stripper might wear to a gothic party.

Then the magic pushed it a step further and got rid of the gothic part entirely, the entire ensemble turning a happy bright pink from fur lining to heel. She would have been mortified if her head wasn’t so hazy.

It was far from over though. Next, it was the image of her very body that started to shift – her assets plumping up, while her waist trimmed down. Her breasts, already uncomfortably exposed by the change in her neckline, became dangerously so as they swelled, pushing out until the cloth was at the point of breaking, every contour of her cantaloupes easily visible through the fabric. Her ass wasn’t far behind, though her dress’s alterations meant it was accommodated much more easily – though, of course, the slats in her sides did nothing to actually cover her now heavenly hips.

By now, Y’shtola’s pose was starting to change. The image of her soul had reflected a cool, calm, confident woman – but that wasn’t to last. Steadily, she shifted, her small grin widening into a dumb smile as she folded her arms behind her head, hands clasped lightly over her pointed ears, and thrust her chest forward, her tail curling in the air behind her to form a little heart shape, dancing over her wiggled hips. Then she froze again – now trapped in the image of a happy dumb bimbo kitten, eager for her next fuck.

But the Archon didn’t notice any of that, was barely even aware of it. The pink magic had done more than soak into a simple image of her body, after all – it was seeping into her soul, her very core. Her mind, already struggling to hold together, had begun to come unspun the instant even the slightest hint of pink light had appeared, slipping into her head and sucking the thoughts out. Information, hard won knowledge, even cherished memories and the faces of her loved ones poured out of her, stealing away and leaving her head pleasantly empty. Caught between two mental magics, she didn’t have a chance to resist.

By the time the dumb smile locked on her face, the mind behind it was just as giddy, and just as dumb. She’d been bimboed right down to her very core.

Still, there was a part of her that held on to hope – in an absent, silly, and very very horny way. As the faint whisps that were left of her mind slowly slid into a hollow headed blissful stasis, she knew that her sexy friends would find her. Her faith in them hadn’t changed even a little, despite the braindrain she had suffered.

Mmm, she really hoped they’d set her free so she could fuck them~ But if they couldn’t, she’d always make an awesome triple triad card~

With one last empty-headed giggle, Y’shtola’s mind settled into mindless harmony, and her sealing was complete. The card flashed one last time, and was still. It would make a fine gift for the allies of Ronka, when they finally arrived…

-

Request: Titans-Raven and Starfire meet up after going undercover as a student and teacher to investigate possible supervillain activity at a university that seemingly popped up overnight. They can certainly confirm the rumors that say that the place would be better suited as the setting for a porno rather then an institution of learning. And not only that, they have discovered that the women here all look like they belong in a porno too, considering their curve sizes! But there's nothing to worry about-these two heroines are totally going to be able to be the best sluts....er, get to the bottom of this!

AFTER A FEW DAYS...

Uh oh-looks like one student is so much of a bimbo that she's failing all of her classes and ended up getting detention for it. Lucky for the stupid slut, her equally slutty and stupid teacher is willing to offer her some extra special 'extra credit'.

https://cdn.discordapp.com/attachments/730984962492465183/944790851001917450/35cf23e2c38725764939af61e21815d2.png

Normally, Raven was used to drawing attention wherever she went. Even when she wasn’t wearing her outfit as a superhero, she tended to attract a few glances. She couldn’t say whether that was because of her pale skin, or the jewel on her forehead, or even just the simple fact that she was a pretty attractive woman in the young adult age bracket… But people tended to notice her. It wasn’t something she was proud of or anything – honestly, it had always made her rather uncomfortable, introvert that she was – it was just something she was passively aware of as a fact of day to day life.

Certainly, she was aware of it enough to notice when it wasn’t happening – and right now, she was being ignored. It was like she didn’t even exist. No one was noticing her, not one single person. And really, she couldn’t even say that was a surprise.

She was currently walking through the atrium in prestigious university – or at least, everyone said it was prestigious. Personally, she couldn’t remember having ever heard of the place before a few weeks ago. But clearly it had something going for it – the place was packed. Students wandered this way and that, some sitting and drinking in a nearby café, some chatting by the central fountain, others just moseying on through. The campus was vibrant and filled with student life.

Though the weird thing was all of those students were absolutely stacked girls. Well, the girl part wasn’t weird – it was a female only institution, after all. But seriously, every single one of them looked like they belonged in a porno! Everything was low cut tops and tied off shirts, bouncing boobs and bubble butts… It was insane! Hell, by comparison, Raven looked as flat as a board…

N-not that she was complaining or anything.

But yeah. That was why she was here, undercover. Something was off in this place – something she meant to uncover. And to do that, she’d enrolled herself at the university, and now walked its halls as a perfectly ordinary student! She’d even traded her purple robe for a white blouse and a black skirt. If it were anywhere else she’d blend in perfectly, but given all the boob monsters around she was worried she stuck out like a sore thumb. Still, no one seemed to have noticed so far…

Yeah, for the moment, all was going well. She’d been concerned, but if no one had stopped her yet, she felt pretty safe saying all was well. Her cover was intact, and soon, she’d be ready to get to the heart of whatever was going on here.

First, though, she needed to find her partner.

Finding herself in an empty corridor, the magical heroine glanced left and right a few times, before ducking into an abandoned classroom. Perfect. Now she just needed to wait for-

“Friend Raven!”

“Gahk!” Or, maybe Starfire had beaten her here, and was waiting to ambush her with a far too tight hug. “Star, let go already!”

The redheaded alien refused to do so. “Ah, but I missed you! Our infiltration of this learning facility has taken so long – I feared I would never see you again!”

Raven rolled her eyes and pulled her way free. “We saw each other two hours ago.”

“Oh. Really?” Star giggled and floated in place innocently. “I am sorry, it felt like much, much longer.”

“I bet…” Raven sighed and looked her friend over. Unlike her, Starfire had managed to get in by being hired as a teacher. Something to do with an extra-terrestrial studies program. Apparently she was fully qualified to teach on her home planet! Which was why she was dressed in an ordinary business suit, a black jacket over a white blouse, instead of having to disguise herself as a student. “Anyway, found anything?”

The alien shook her head. “Not yet. I haven’t been here for long though. I shall keep a knife in my eyes while I look around.”

“…” Raven took a moment for that one, and then groaned. “You mean keep your eyes peeled, don’t you?”

“Of course! In fact, I’m supposed to be attending a meeting of the staff in a few minutes! I’m sure that if there’s anything suspicious going on, I’ll be able to see it there.”

The witch nodded thoughtfully. “Alright. I’d better get to class then. I’ll keep watch for anything weird, and we’ll meet up after lectures end this evening and go over everything together. Sound good?”

Star gave her a bright thumbs up. “It does! Don’t worry, Friend Raven – we’ll crack this case soon, I know it!”

Raven couldn’t help but smile a little at her enthusiasm. “Yeah, no doubt. Anyway, get going. Neither of us wants to be late…”

The pair split, Starfire zipping off through the air to whatever staff room she’d been called off to, while Raven took the much more mundane path over the ground to her first classroom. Obviously, she wasn’t actually here to study, but keeping up her cover meant she had to attend at least a few lectures. Besides, it made sense to check that this place really was a university. If their classes proved to be busts, then that would finish this whole investigation off right there and then!

But no such luck. When she arrived, the class was already packed with her fellow students – all of them big and busty. She tried not to feel too self-conscious as she squeezed her way through their ranks over towards an empty desk at the back, but she couldn’t help but feel that some of their ditzy giggles were aimed at her.

… Well, whatever. She wasn’t here to make friends, was she? She could ignore what a bunch of bimbo pornstars thought of her. Taking a seat, the witch pushed all thoughts of her classmates aside, and focused on the teacher – who was also just as busty as everyone else around here – as she walked into the room.

“Like, hey everyone! Welcome to Introductory Studies 101! It’s, like, super awesome to see you all here again – and some new faces as well! Cool!” The teacher smiled brightly, and Raven’s brow creased. ‘See you all again’? This was supposed to be an introductory class for new students – why would so many girls be taking it a second time?

Her question was sort of answered a moment later, as the teacher continued. “Now, I’m going to put the intro movie up on screen – this time, girls, try to pay attention! You won’t pass if you don’t pay attention in class~”

Huh. So these girls had failed the class? How tough was this intro course supposed to be? How very strange…

As the teacher turned on the big screen at the front of the classroom, Raven focused her attention on it, not wanting to miss a single detail. If there was something odd going on in this school, this was where she’d find it, she was sure. She just had to pay attention, and keep an eye out for anything suspicious.

… It was weird, though. For such an advanced university, the film they were showing sure was flickering a lot. And… It was really difficult to make out what was on screen. Was that… A spiral…?

…

ONE WEEK LATER

“Alright girls!” The teacher, the lovely Miss S, clapped her hands cheerfully. “That’s all for today. You can all go home – and make sure you practice what you learned tonight! When you come in tomorrow, I’ll wanna see, like, all those boobies lubed up and ready for cock!”

There was a smattering of cheers and “Yes Miss S!”s around the classroom as it filled with the sound of clattering chairs and thumping desks, a small horde of big boobed babes packing away their toys for the trip back home.

“Oh, except you, Ray! We totally need to chat, so stay after class~”

“Awwwh…” The purple pig-tailed Ray sank back into her chair, her plush rear providing a nice and plump cushion underneath her. Of course, her being held back was nothing new. There was a reason she wore a pointy white ‘Dunce’ cap on her head in most of her classes, including this one. She just wasn’t as bright as her classmates, even if her boobs were the biggest on campus.

In fact, as if to prove a point, by the time the other girls had cleared out and Miss S had walked over to speak, Ditzy Ray had already forgotten that she was being held back – she was just playing with her hair while posing for a selfie with her phone.

“Now, Student Ray…” The teacher sat on the girl’s desk, the traditional bun her red hair was wrapped in bouncing as she set down, getting her attention back easily as the pigtailed girl’s eyes gravitated straight to the older woman’s jiggling orange tits. “You need to pay more attention in class! You’re, like, failing every single one, and you’ll never be a proper porn star if you don’t learn this stuff, even if you’re totally cute~”

Ray wiggled in her seat, her oh so short skirt already hitched up higher than a skirt had any right to go, exposing her soaking wet panties. “I try, Miss S,” she whined, pouting a little as one of her hands slipped down below her waist. “But, like… I get so horny… And then I can’t… like…”

Already she was breathing hard just looking at the teacher’s massive funbags, barely contained by her business jacket, the blouse beneath always on the verge of tearing itself apart to hold them in. Even as she stared, slick, squelching sounds started coming from beneath her desk…

Miss S giggled, and then fondly cupped her student’s cheek with her hand. “Oh you dumb lil’ bimbo~ I totally get it! I was, y’know, the same way when I first started here! It took a lot of hands-on work with the principle to make me the big titty teacher that you know today…” Now her hips were starting to wiggle as well, the teacher biting her lip at the fond memories that rose up in her head.

But she still had a student to teach, so with a supreme effort of her poxy little will, she pushed those thoughts back for later. “Which is why I asked him to hold a special session just for you!” She said, patting the pale skinned bimbo on the head. “You’ll never forget a good fucking from the principle~ That’ll drill all these lessons even into your empty head!”

“Ooohhh…” Ray’s pumping fingers sped up as she imagined serving the schools dreamy principle. That was every girl’s dream! “R-really? You totally mean it?”

“Totally!” Miss S grinned – and then stood up, casually unbuttoning her top. “But first, I gotta make sure you’re ready to please him. Like, I can’t give him a silly little girl who doesn’t know how to suck a cock, can I? That’d be super dumb!”

“Oh yeah…” Ray nodded. That would be super dumb. “But, like… I can’t remember that class…”

“I know, dummy.” The teacher giggled, dropping her skirt with the rest of her clothes – revealing that she was already wearing one of the school’s toy of the line strap-ons. “So I’m gunna give you a little extra credit right here and now to train you up. Now get those tits out, bitch!”

“Y-yes ma’am!” The student barked with delight, standing up so quickly that her chair went skidding across the floor and hurrying to open her top. Naturally, her fingers were too clumsy to undo the few buttons that remained on her white blouse, but that was fine – the slightest touch and they just popped off anyway. The ditz had been tying off the bottom of her shirt anyway – otherwise her tittys were just too big to hold!

But as she knelt down in front of her teacher, big breasts heaving in her hands, her vapid eyes already entranced by the faux-cock waving in front of her, she knew one thing. She was going to focus her all on this lesson. She wouldn’t miss a single detail! If this was what she had to do to get on in this school, she would do it, she was sure. She just had to pay attention… And keep an eye out for how to be the best slut she could possibly be~

-

Request: Fairy Tail-when dangerous world saving jobs are scarce, mages have to do with manual labor. Which is why Lucy and Erza are working on a farm to get some spending money. Unfortunately for them, the farmer has decided that he needs the help on the farm permanently. And his old ‘family recipe’ combined with hard labor on a hot day will do just the trick. A few drinks of this will have the two mages reduced to brainless, buff, and busty rednecks before either of them know what’s happening! And as far as their new identities and memories are concerned, they are always happy to let the boss do the thinking for them-as long as they get a good role in the hay now and then.

The Kingdom of Fiore was a place often beset by dangers and trials. Evil mages, or terrible dark artifacts, or sinister plots working to undermine the very fabric of civilisation… All of these things tended to come along and cause problems on a fairly regular basis. That as why the people of that little nation depended on the power of guilds to protect them – groups of powerful mages, come together in joined cause (which was usually money). Through them, Fiore retained a measure of peace and security… Yes, even through Fairy Tail, possibly the most chaotic of all guilds on the continent. Sometimes especially through Fairy Tail – and really, that was the kind of thought that kept people up at night.

Sometimes, though, the unusual happened, and peace settled over the land. The evil threats that caused so much trouble were defeated, and no dark forces rose to take their place. As impossible as it seemed, sometimes everything was just plain fine.

Which was kind of a problem when you made your living as a mercenary. It was tricky to find work when there were no forces of evil to fight. Oh, sure, there was guard work or escorting caravans… But the thing about that was when there wasn’t anything else for the guilds to focus on, work of that variety got snatched up quickly. And it turned out no one wanted to hire a guild known for being crazy.

Thus, Fairy Tail was having a bit of a cash flow problem at the moment. A temporary one, they were all sure, but one that meant that funds were a bit tight, and that everyone’s wages would be taking a bit of a hit for a while.

Essentially, if any of them wanted money, they’d have to find it themselves – and the work was unlikely to be glamorous.

And so…

“Do we really have to work here?” Lucy Heartfilia was not enjoying her new job on the farm, spending far more of her time than she liked doing heavy lifting and not nearly enough tending to the cute little animals – who it turned out really weren’t that cute once you got up close and personal with them.

“Is there a problem with it?” And naturally, Erza Scarlet, Fairy Tail’s Titania, wasn’t bothered in the slightest. After starting work on the farm she had switched her outfit for a pair of dungarees (because of course she had a pair of dungarees in her magical costume selection) and had gotten right to work, lifting crates and bales without a problem, because she was a monster and no one should ever forget that fact.

The pair had been out here for almost a week now, and Lucy was reaching her limit. It wasn’t that she was a whiner – okay, not a seriouswhiner – but she really wasn’t adjusting well to this line of work. It just didn’t suit her – and as happy as her summons were to help, she felt bad about calling them out to do such menial tasks for her.

“I don’t know,” the blonde finally grumbled, setting her pitchfork down. “It’s just not really the kind of thing I thought I’d be doing when I joined Fairy Tail…”

The redhead chuckled. “Well, sometimes this is how things work out. But don’t worry – I’m sure the guild will be back in fighting form before too long. And in the meantime, we have to earn money somehow, don’t we?”

“Ugh, don’t remind me…” The spectre of rent hung heavy over Lucy’s head. Yeah, she really didn’t have a choice about this one.

Erza patted her friend on the back. “Well, if it’s really not working for you, we can look for something else. I know Natsu and Happy are probably still out roaming the wilds looking for something to punch, and Wendy is still off helping Mira Jean at that café – but we might be able to find some work with Gray and Juvia if we try…”

“Oh, really?” The key summoner’s attitude immediately brightened. “Yeah, let’s give that a try!”

The redhead nodded. “Very well. We’ll make today our last day. Hopefully farmer Jones won’t be too upset at our sudden departure…”

“Did I hear someone callin’ my name?” Speak of the devil, the farmer himself, a man with dark hair and a well groomed beard stepped out of the house, carrying a tray with two tankards on it. “Hope yer’ sayin’ good things about me, ladies!”

“Of course, Boss.” Lucy gave him her brightest smile. “There’s nothing bad to say!”

“Indeed. You’ve been a very good employer,” Erza said with a smile, taking the drink offered to her. “Though I’m sad to say, I think it’s time that we moved on. There are other pastures for us to explore out there.”

The farmer sighed, making sure Lucy took her tankard as well before nodding. “I have been fearin’ you’d be saying somethin’ like that to me soon. It’s not often this farm gets such a good pair of hands to work it – figured it wouldn’t last.”

“Sorry Boss, but you know how it is – we’re adventurers! We’ve got to go out and see the world eventually.” That was a little bold for Lucy, but she was feeling a bit poetic – probably to try and feel civilised while knee deep in muck.

“Well, yeah, that’s fair ‘nough.” Jones wore a rueful smile, but he didn’t seem too upset, which was a relief. “Don’t reckon I can argue with that. Heh, cheers to your adventurous souls, ladies!” He winked. “I think I’ll miss ‘em when they’re gone.”

The two Fairy Tail mages laughed and tapped their mugs together with a small cheer, before both took a big swig. And as they drank, neither noticed the sinister smile beneath the man’s beard.

…

Lucy sat down heavily, already out of breath. She’d resolved not to use her spirit keys on her last day, mostly to save on mana, but she was definitely starting to regret that choice. It was like all the hardest work had saved itself until she was about to leave, then come at her all at once!

Wiping the sweat off her brow, she reached for her tankard – still mostly full – and took another swig. Immediately, a cool, refreshing feeling washed straight through her, banishing the ache building in her muscles and chilling the exhausted heat on her skin like they had never been.

“Wow!” She gasped, smacking her lips and enjoying the smooth aftertaste, before drooping again as she realised this miraculous recovery meant she had to return to her work. Grudgingly, she put her drink back down and walked over to the next hay bale she had to lift – only to shock herself as she lifted it easily.

Eyes wide, she looked down at her arms, seeing bulging, buff muscles that she could have sworn weren’t there yesterday… And then she grinned.

“Wow! I guess all the work I’ve been putting in out here has been for something after all!”

Any feeling of strangeness thus banished, she tested herself by lifting another bale – and finding to her delight that she was easily strong enough to carry one on each arm – before marching them both into the barn. Behind her, her tankard, still nearly half full, waited for her to run out of energy once again…

…

Erza was having trouble.

It was odd. Counting the chickens was always a task she’d had no problem with before. It was simply a matter of instilling proper discipline in the birds to get them to hold still – something she had more than enough practice with as one of the S ranked mages of Fairy Tail. And the chickens were indeed holding still, frozen under her gaze like always as she came to make sure none had gone missing or been taken by foxes in the night.

And yet…

And yet it was strangely difficult to count them, and she wasn’t sure why. Every time she tried, the numbers would grow slow and heavy in her head, and then she’d lose track of herself and have to start over. It was irritating.

Brow wrinkling, she took another swig of her tankard, before setting it down and trying again. “Let me see. One… Two… Three… Uh… F-four… Ssssix- no, wait, five. Um.”

Biting her lip, she struggled to concentrate. Why was this so, uh, hard? It was like her head was full of molasses or something…

Oh, wait! Her eyes widened as she was struck by a sudden bolt of genius. Of course, the answer was so simple.

Carefully, she held out her hands, and as she started mouthing the numbers once again, she began counting them on her fingers. “One… Two… Three… Four… Yeah! Haha, this is much easier!” She guffawed, taking another drink…

… And then grunting in irritation, and starting over again. “One… Two… Uh… Three…”

…

By the end of the day, both women were thoroughly exhausted, even with their newly buff muscles and strangely empty heads. But both were satisfied with a job well done, finishing off their drinks happily as they trundled back towards the house after finishing in the fields.

It was Lucy who spoke first, the strange haze over her mind parting a little as she saw her friend – and noticed something that felt a little different. “Hey, uh, Erza… Like, when did your tits get so big?”

She blinked. That hadn’t been what she meant to say, was it? It sounded kinda…. Crude. But then, how else was she supposed to say it? Erza’s boobs were enormous, stretching out the front of the woman’s dungarees like crazy! The blonde was sure they hadn’t been that big the last time she’d seen her… Had they…?

The redhead blinked at her, confused, and then looked down at herself. Two big, jiggly melons were waiting for her on her chest, but that was perfectly normal, wasn’t it? “Uh… Nah, I dun think so… But wait… Lucy, what about yours?”

That brought the summoner up short. A dull, uncertain expression crossed her face, not unlike the one on Erza’s, and she looked down to likewise see a gigantic pair of heifers, bouncing and strainging against her casual cowgirl outfit.

“Mine?” She asked slowly, turning the question over in her oddly empty head, before shrugging, sending her chest bouncing. “Looks normal to me?”

“Huh…” Erza stared for a second longer, before shrugging as well. “’Kay. Let’s get back to the house then. Farmer Jones’ll be waitin’…”

“Yeah…” Lucy nodded, following eagerly in her wake. “Don’t wanna make him wait…”

…

“Well girls, it’s been a good time.” Farmer Jones was indeed waiting for them in the kitchen – with another pair of large mugs ready. “I’ll certainly miss havin’ ol’ Lucy and Erza working my fields. Ain’t often a fella like me’s lucky enough to get two beauties like you comin’ along.”

“Awh, shucks Boss~” Lucy blushed, a shy smile on her face. There was something so captivating about how the good farmer was talking today, and the way he looked at her made her feel so warm inside. It was starting to feel like a shame that they were leaving.

“Now every word I’m sayin’ is true, darlin’!” Jones chuckled. “There certainly ain’t gunna be replacing you two. Lord knows I ain’t even gunna try. But I did wanna thank you both for your service so far, ladies – so here. I’m crackin’ out my ol’ family recipe.” He pushed the tankards over the table towards the two. “Drink up! Trust me, it’ll make whole new women out o’ye.”

“Thank you, sir.” Erza smiled as she accepted the gift, taking a seat at the kitchen table. Lucy joined her, privately a little amused that the redhead’s smile looked so dopey, and not noticing for a moment that hers did as well. “We’ll, uh… We’ll treasure our time here with you.”

That got a belly laugh. “I don’t doubt that you will! But enough pleasantries now. Bottoms up, ladies! Don’t let that ol’ family recipe go to waste!”

They certainly weren’t going to do a silly thing like that! Gladly, both women put their tankards to their lips and raised them, drinking deep of the cool, refreshing beverage that poured into their mouths like a storm flowing down a river.

Glug. Glug. Glug.

Ahhhhh. The pair set their empty mugs down, swaying a little in their chairs as liquid dripped down their chins and pooled between their breasts. Suddenly, the both felt really… really… sleeeeeeepppyyyy…

As one, Lucy and Erza’s heads fell forwards into their swelling chests, snores echoing from their mouths. Luckily, those bountiful bosoms turned out to offer a very comfortable pair of pillows for the night. And as they dreamed of handsome farmers and menial farm work, their bodies continued to change…

…

She woke slowly, sunlight shining down on her face when she finally opened her eyes. Blinking, she rose and looked around. Ngh… Had she fallen asleep in the kitchen again? Oops. Boss’d told her to stop doing that…

With a deep breath, she pushed herself to her feet, and then paused. Her eyes fell upon her reflection in the mirror hanging on the far wall, and something felt off for a moment. But what? She tilted her head.

Long black hair… Check.

Huge honkin’ hooters… Check.

Arms that could choke out a bear… Double check!

Huh. She looked fine, didn’t she? So what was she so worried about? Silly Hilda…

… Hilda? She blinked at her own reflection again. Yeah, Hilda. Why was she so bothered by her own name?

Eh, whatever. Thinking the long just made her head hurt. Better to just find the Boss and ask him. She got up and wandered off.

Finding the Boss didn’t take long though – he was in the front room, a naked blonde on her knees in front of him sucking him off. Hilda scowled for a moment, and then remembered her as well. That was just ol’ Jenny – her slut sister! The two of them both served the big man of the house – Jenny’d just woken up before her, is all, so she got the reward of his morning wood. Dangit – she’d beat her to it tomorrow!

For now though… “Heya Boss!” She greeted her Master with a smile. “What’ll ah be doin’ today?”

Hilda knew she was far too stupid to be doing any thinking for herself, after all – same as Jenny! They let the Boss do all of that hard stuff, and just focused on takin’ care of his hard stuff in the meantime~

“Mornin’ Hilly.” The Boss grunted, gripping Jenny’s head as he thrust into her mouth. “Nothin’ too fancy today. Had a pair a’ strumpets helpin’ out ‘til yesterday, but they’re good an’ gone now. You just head on down to the barn and start stacking the hay they left, yeah? There’s a good girl. Ol’ Jenny’ll be along to help when I’m done with ‘er.”

“Can do sir!” The raven haired redneck gave the man a stiff salute, and then started jiggling her way towards the door.

“Oh, and Hilly?” A call stopped her, and she looked back over her shoulder.

“Yes Boss?”

“Do a good job, and I’ll give you a proper seeing to after lunch, alright?”

“Ooh!” She almost jumped in delight. “You got it Boss!”

Hilda hurried out the door, bouncing all the way to the barn. There wasn’t any reward she wanted more than a quick tumble in the hay with her beloved Master. She was going to do the best damn job in the world – just you wait and see if she didn’t!

Yes, Hilda and Jenny would prove to be very effective workers on the farm from now on. Oh, dumb as a haystack without a needle, sure, but they were strong and they worked darn hard – and with boobs that big, what more could you want in a farmhand? Farmer Jones was certainly happy.

And as for Lucy and Erza, well… They were happy as well. Even if neither of them remembered those names ever again. In the end, ain’t that a happily ever after, of a sorts? It suited them just fine, either way!

-

Request: Original Characters: Olivia plans to use her newest invention on the puppet mistress and illusionist extraordinaire, Azura. It doesn't go well, Olivia is trapped in an illusion while her will is broken down until she's fully enthralled by Azura. Finally, deciding she has no use for the scientist's mind, she has Olivia put on her own brain-draining helmet. Once she's nice and hollowed out, Azura figures she could use a new drooling, mindless decoration/toy, and laments that while Olivia's mind wasn't worth much, her body surely will be.

“So!” Azura kicked her feet out, her legs currently dangling over the back of her chair. “Where would you like to start, Doc?”

A blue haired woman in a white lab coat grabbed her arm and pulled her around so she was sitting in said chair properly. “Well first, sit up. None of my scanning equipment is going to work right if they’re focusing on your toes.” She grumbled as she moved over to check on some of those devices. “And second… Hm. Begin recording.”

At her command, there was a whirring sound, and the computer screen on a desk at the side of the room lit up. [Beginning Recording,] said a pleasant, albeit mechanical, female voice. The woman’s office was filled with technical doodads and whatnots, some of which might have been microphones, all of them trained towards Azura’s chair at the centre of the room. It looked like a disorganised scientific mess… And to be honest, it probably was.

“Start with your name,” the scientist continued, already studying the readings she was getting with interest. “And then a summary of your powers – as you understand them. That will do for starters…”

Azura shrugged, keeping her fidgeting to a minimum. The also-blue haired woman (though hers was a darker, and in her opinion finer, shade of cyan) wore a blue mask that covered the upper part of her face, leaving just her eyes and mouth exposed, while her actual clothes broke brand and went with black for the rest – a black jacket and jeans, the formal yet casual look for a thief.

“It’s a weird setup, I’ll grant, but your habits I’ll not knock…” The woman folded her arms behind her head and leaned back – only to grumble when the scientist pulled said arms out of the way of her scanners.

“Alright, very well, I’ll start at the top.

You’ve asked me to speak and I’ve no reason to stop.

My name is Azura, it’s how I like to be known,

And my abilities are splendid, as I’m sure I have shown!”

“Less with the rhyming, please…” The scientist said, still studying her computer. “Just the basics are fine.”

“But Olivia, my dear, the rhyming is key!” Azura giggled.

“It’s part of the puzzle to understand me~

But alright, understood, I’ll keep it in brief.

I’m just the narrator – you are the chief.”

There was a groan from Olivia’s side of the room, but she didn’t speak up. Azura took this as a win.

“Now my powers, you’ve asked, and I’ll grant no delusion,

I’m the mistress of trickery, of lies and illusion.

I’ll make people see, well, whatever they like!

And while they’re distracted, yes, that’s when I strike.

I slip into their heads on a thread made of thought,

Then take what I like while I leave them with naught.

It’s really quite mean of me, I’m rather a cad,

But with powers like this it’s hard not to be bad~”

“Ooohkay.” Olivia finally stood up and looked back to her ‘guest’ in the lab. “That was… very unnecessarily abstract, but overall an acceptable summary of your abilities. You get into people’s heads via a psychic mechanism and fool their senses to generate illusions, yes?”

Azura opened her mouth-

“Yes or no answers only, please.”

- And then shut it again, glaring in annoyance – the first break in her confident demeanour since they’d entered the lab. Olivia smirked right back at her, happy to finally be setting the terms on her study here.

Finally, grudgingly, the illusionist answered. “Sure.”

It wasn’t a yes, but it also wasn’t a rhyme, so that still counted as a win. Great! “Excellent. Presumably these powers are somewhat unique to you. How old were you when they first manifested?”

“Four.”

“…” The two stared at one another for a long moment. Olivia’s eye twitched. “Alright. Fine. Be that way. Do your powers manifest in any other ways, or is it just illusions?”

Azura shrugged, grinning. “Other ways? A few, I can also read minds…

It’s easy to do if you know all the signs.

Oh, and puppetry too, I don’t know if I said,

But binding up limbs is a use of my thread~”

As if to demonstrate, the psychic knitted her fingers together and them pulled them apart – and like a kind of ghostly cat’s cradle, thin, gleaming blue strands of energy were woven between them, a shimmering manifestation of her power.

“Fascinating…” Olivia was scribbling down notes, eyes constantly darting between the various readouts of her scanners. “So your ‘threads’ can manifest physically as well as mentally. And you read minds? Incredible!”

“I’m blessed, I admit.” Azura dispelled her thread and examined her nails.

“They beat empty wit.

But is that all you wanted? I’d like to get home.

The evening’s quite late, come set down your tome.”

“Just ooooone more thing,” Olivia hurried over to her desk again and started rummaging through the mess- I mean, the scientifically organised piles of discovery, looking for… “Aha! Here it is!”

She turned around, proudly holding a helmet in her hands. It was a sleek looking thing, with a great glass visor over the front for the eyes and thick looking headphones inbuilt for the ears. Azura quirked her eyebrow. But apparently she didn’t have a rhyme for this one, since she stayed silent.

Olivia was all too glad to answer her unspoken question anyway. “It’s just one last in depth scanner! It should be able to detect what it is about your brain that gives you these abilities. Once it’s done, you won’t need to worry about any more tests, I promise.”

The psionic thief sighed, but shrugged, clearly not having a problem with it – and not objecting when the scientist plonked her shiny helmet down on her head. She merely drummed her fingers against an armrest, clearly quite impatient to get a move on.

The scientist watched with open amusement, a troubling grin growing on her face as the helmet activated, visor lighting up with strange patterns. “How does it feel?”

“Honestly?” Azura sighed. “It’s quite a bore.

Tell me what it’s really for.”

Olivia cackled. “That’s right! Too late, you realise! That’s no scanner – that’s my patent pending Brain Drain 6900! Right now, you should be feeling a light sense of euphoria as your synapses start melting beneath its tender hands. Those spirals you’re seeing have been scientifically calculated to create the ultimate hypnotic lure, and the subliminals pumping into your ears will soon have what little brains you’ve got pouring out of you~ And the best part of all is even though you know it’s doing all of this, there’s no way to take it off! You’re locked in for bimbo town, baby!”

“I see.” The psychic didn’t seem overly concerned – Olivia assumed that the trance the helmet was putting her in was already numbing her reactions. “That’s quite a device.

You know, you could have just asked nice.”

The blue haired scientist rolled her eyes. “Oh please. I know what I’m dealing with here. You’re a scoundrel and a thief. I bet you only agreed to these tests here to scope the place out and see what you could steal from me anyway. But too bad – I’m stealing your brain first~ And then later I’ll be playing with your sexy little body on my terms.”

The helmet whirred, and Azura nodded.

“It’s not a bad plan, though I won’t say that it’s cunning…

It’s far from the worst scheme you could have been running.

But… I guess it’s time for the games to end now, huh?”

… Hey, wait a sec. Olivia blinked. “That wasn’t a rhyme.”

“No,” said Azura, getting to her feet and pulling the helmet off of her head with a ‘pop’. “No it wasn’t. Rhymes are for when you’re just playing around, dear Olivia~ But if you’re going to be so direct about trying to enslave me, then it’s time I got serious.”

“Wha-?” The Scientist gaped, her eyes widening as the room around her started to melt – literally melt. The desk, the chairs, the wallpaper, everything falling away and dissolving on the floor to reveal a pure white room – white walls, white floor, white everything. In a matter of moments, her entire lab was gone, replaced with an empty void. “H-how…?”

“Oh Olivia…” Suddenly Azura was right next to her, an arm around her shoulders as her body curled against hers possessively. “I thought you were supposed to be smart! Come on now, you can do it. I know you have all the pieces in that silly little noggin of yours~”

The closeness was startling, but for some reason the blunette couldn’t bring herself to pull away. Instead, she focused on solving the riddle she found herself in – and the answer was depressingly simple. Or was that simply depressing? “You… You showed me what I wanted to see. You got inside my head at some point in the lab…”

“There you go!” Azura petted the woman on the head. “Though, wrong on one detail. I got one of my threads into you the instant that we met. I know you had a bunch of defences planned – I can read them all in your head – but, oops, you prepared for the wrong kind of psychic. I’m not like one of those bald guys you read about in comics. I’m a puppet master. And you, my dear…” A finger slid down the scientist’s face to boop her on the nose. “Are my newest puppet~”

“Uh.” Oh shit. “So I don’t suppose you’re willing to be reasonable about this…?”

“After you tried to melt my mind?” The blue haired thief smiled. It was not a comforting smile. “I think I’m going to be very reasonable. I’m just going to return the favour – that’s fair, right?”

“I- I can get you money? Or tech! I could be your hacker buddy! Why don’t we just-op?”

A silencing finger rested against her lips. “Dearest, I know you can. I already read through your mind.” Azura leaned forward and winked under her mask. “I know all of your secrets, babe. I’ve sifted through your past, and I already know your future. I’ve copied your knowledge, and I know your bank account number. All you have to offer me is your body, babe – and your mind doesn’t need to be included.”

“But-!”

“Shhhh.” Azura leaned in, her forehead resting against Olivia’s – and the scientist found she couldn’t look away as the thief’s eyes turned into deep, captivating blue spirals. “Let’s get this over with, shall we?”

“Relax and go limp, my pretty sweet thing,

It’s time to let go and to let your head ping.

The struggle is over, the war has been won,

You’ve no chance of winning, your chances are none.

You danced with the devil, now you’re caught in her grip,

And though you may fight, your will’s starting to slip.

Look into my eyes now, sink down nice and deep,

That racing mind slows fast, falls dead asleep.

Your head’s growing empty, your will is all gone,

You’re falling straight under, there’s no need to go on.

I’m going to count down now, and you’ll learn to behave,

By the time I reach zero, you will be my slave.

I’m starting at Three, your resistance departs.

And I’m dropping to Two as we join in our hearts.

There’s only One left now, no time for a hero…

Time’s up, that was it – your mind is at Zero.”

Olivia tried to resist – she really did! But as Azura spoke, her voice soft and luring, whispering sweetly into her ear, and the spirals in her eyes slowly expanded to consume everything, filling her senses to the brim, she found herself starting to falter. Everything felt so warm, and gentle, and nice… By the time the thief had reached the end of her induction, the scientist was swaying on her feet – and a snap of Azura’s fingers right by her ear was all it took to shove her completely over the edge.

Ping!

A wide, dumb smile spread over her face as her eyes filled with blue spirals, the utter hollowness of her head obvious for all to see. Her enslavement, quick and brutal, was already complete.

“There we go!” The psychic beside her smiled, petting her on the head once more, and giggling as her slave started to drool. “Was that so bad? No, of course it wasn’t.”

Around them, the illusionary world that she’d used to ensnare Olivia’s senses faded – revealing her lab, just as she thought it had been – though Azura had never actually sat down to let the scientist do her scans. That had all been in her head. A delusion so real she could never have seen through it, dancing at the whim of the puppet master.

There had been one real thing in there though…

“Ah, here we go.” Azura spent a moment rooting through the mess on Olivia’s desk, before lifting up a familiar helmet. It was heavier in real life than the one she’d summoned from the scientist’s memories, but it looked just the same – sleek and shiny.

“I know you wanted this thing to get some use today, Dearest,” the blunette thief said, dancing over towards where her slave stood, staring blankly into space, the front of her lab coat slowly growing quite moist. “But I’m afraid I’m rather attached to my brain. How fortunate that you’ve no more need of yours then, right?”

Even if she wasn’t rhyming, Azura was just a theatrical girl in general, and she set the helmet onto Olivia’s head like a crown on a king. Then, for a final touch just as she turned the thing on, she snapped her fingers and switched the woman’s mind back on.

“Wh- Huh?” To her credit, Olivia was quick on the uptake. She saw the spirals flashing in her eyes, heard the hiss of subliminals in her ears, and immediately knew what was happening. Of course, that wasn’t going to last. “No, stop!”

She reached up to pull the device off her, but her hands stopped just short of gripping it – the hypnotic commands already sinking into her mind not allowing her to take the helmet off on her own. Desperately, she looked around for an escape, her eyes locking on Azura.

“H-hey, you gotta, like, help me!” Already, her words were starting to slur, eyes losing focus as the brutal brainwashing went to town on her head. “I’m, like, super smart and stuff! You can’t turn me into a dummy!”

“Oh? Super smart, huh?” Azura’s smirk was vicious and cruel. “Okay, I’ll let you go – if you can prove how smart you are. What’s 75481 times 12?”

Olivia stared at her blankly. The psychic could swear she saw steam leaking out of her ears. “Uh…”

“Too hard for you? How about 1528 divided by 7?”

The scientist’s eyes were crossed, and she was drooling openly on her labcoat. “I… dunnuh…”

The thief took pity on her. “How about 6 plus 9?”

“Muuuhhh…” Olivia slumped in place, spirals flashing in her eyes as her jaw hung completely open. You could practically hear the wind whistling between her ears.

“No? Ah, too bad. Guess you always were a dummy, after all.” Azura snapped her fingers again, and chuckled as the doubly brainless dolt stiffened to attention in front of her. “Still, even if your mind is sludge, that body of yours should be worth a pretty penny.” Her threads snuck out, wrapping around her slave’s limbs and moving them like a puppet. “Come on, dear – my lair needed a hatstand anyway~”

And Olivia, brainwashed two times over, was happy to obey. This wasn’t the hands-on experience she’d wanted to get with Azura’s powers – but it had certainly been very informative! For Azura, anyway…

-

Request: Here's that Nep one! With more Blanc bullying:

Blanc finds herself knee deep in editing the games code. Why? Because of one chest joke too many. If those damn game devs won't give her the boobs she deserves, then she's just going to have to do it herself, reality altering implications be damned! Only problem is that writing out the code has proven to be more difficult than expected.

So she makes the rash, anger-fueled decision to just copy over some of Vert's code concerning her bust. Unfortunately for Blanc, Vert's tits are so central to her character that her entire personality, allegiances, mannerisms and more are stored in that code. As it's copied over the immense filesize overwrites most of Blanc bit by bit, predominantly using all that storage space that houses her intelligence. Will she be able to resist? Or is it Deja Vu as she ends up Vert's long-desired bimbo twin?

It was late in the evening, and the office was almost entirely empty. Only the occasional beam of light, the product of a wandering security guard patrolling the floor, disturbed the peace here – and even then, only for a few seconds every hour. Everyone had gone home by this hour – no overtime bonuses to be earned with midnight crunch sessions this early in the development cycle. Right now, the next Neptunia game was only a few concepts and a brief demo. Plans for how it would develop going forward were still being made. It might end up as a spinoff, for all anyone knew. For the moment, there just wasn’t much to work on, and not much to worry about. There’d be time for that later in the development cycle, when its concept had been hammered out into something more. For now, all was peaceful.

… Until a door at the back of the room clicked open, and a brunette head hidden behind very thick sunglasses popped in to look around.

“Maybe this… Finally!” The woman, who couldn’t possibly be Blanc, the Goddess White Heart, even though she was absolutely wearing Blanc’s normal clothes – because look at those sunglasses. Did Blanc wear sunglasses?At night? No she did not – darted into the room and slid the door shut behind her, leaning against it to get her breath back.

“Geeze. Who’dve thought they’d have so much security in here… Whatever. Where’s that damn code…”

The mysterious woman glanced about one more time, before hurrying over to one of the computers and booting it up. The white light illuminated her pale face, and she squinted for a moment, before removing her sunglasses with a grumble, revealing…

… BLANC!

“Who the hell is playing dramatic chords at this hour?” The goddess wondered, looking up as ominous music played, before shrugging the question off. Not important. She was here on a mission. “Forget it. C’mon, where are the character profiles… Aha!”

She clicked and pulled up a folder listing the Neptunia cast. Hm. Yep, there they were – the CPUs, their alternate form, their little sisters, and the other common characters (You know, the ones who are kind of cool but aren’t really all that relevant apart from Compa and IF, sometimes)(And even those two are Iffy lately).

It was-

(Heh, see what I did there? Iffy? Yeah, you get it, you’re-)

“Shut the fuck up!” Blanc hissed at the narration. “I’m working here!”

Right, right. (We’ll talk later.) So anyway, it was exactly what the goddess of Lowee had been hoping for. These were the master files, the ones from which everything Nep was copied. It was kind of like the Akashic record, but for fanservicy video game ladies. Although not all of those ladies were as fanservicy as they want-

“I swear to god,” Blanc muttered, already typing away at the computer, “if you go where I think you’re going with this, I’m going to Akashic your record, you get me?”

… Right, not entirely sure what she meant by that, but maybe it’d be best to tread carefully here, gentle audience. So, Blanc, our most mighty, most benevolent goddess, was… inspecting the contents of these files for… errors. Yes. Mistakes. The writers were only human, after all, and as a goddess she was perfectly positioned to make sure that anything that wasn’t quite right was properly corrected.

“That’s better.” Blanc nodded to herself, grinning as the four CPU’s file opened up on screen for her.

Mistakes like measurements, for example.

“Exactly!”

And she absolutely wouldn’t use this as a chance to get some petty revenge on any of the other goddesses, would she?

“Uh.” Blanc paused, her finger hovering over the delete key, Vert’s chest size already selected. She could feel the judgemental, angry eyes of the thousands who liked blondes with big boobs bearing down upon her. “Ugh, fine.” She moved the cursor away. “I mean, of course I wouldn’t.”

Of course she wouldn’t.

“But I am going to correct this much, at least.” Now her mouse moved over towards her own measurements instead, highlighting her own chest size. “I mean, I’m not going to go too crazy or anything. Just balance things out a bit!”

She typed in GG, and slammed enter.

…

Nothing seemed to happen. She frowned at the screen. Even the text she’d typed in had failed to take, her measurements already rest to ‘Flat’.

“What the hell?!?” She grabbed the monitor and shook it. “That wasn’t what it said before! Is this another flat joke? Is it? Is it?!?Do you have any idea how many of those I’ve had to take over the years?!? ARGH!”

(Stay still, audience. She might not see you if you don’t. Move.)

“Why the hell isn’t this working?” Practically punching the keyboard, Blanc tried again, over and over, but each time her changes had no effect. The words just mocked her. Taunted her. Called her flat chested.

She nearly punched the monitor.

“Alright. Alright! If that’s how you want to be about it,” the divine brunette snarled, pulling Vert’s profile back up. “Then how about this? If you won’t take any new info, I’ll just copy the boob demon’s!”

Somewhere, Vert sneezed, and wondered if someone had just insulted her…

But Blanc didn’t care, quickly selecting the goddess greenheart’s chest size – and accidentally getting a heck of a lot more of her profile in her anger – copied, clicked her own profile, and paste!

…

This time something definitely happened, although the goddess wasn’t sure what. She felt… strange. Sort of like feeling the rumble of thunder when you hadn’t seen the lightning.

Error! Flashed up on the screen in bright red letters, and she frowned. “Error? What the hell? What kind of error?”

She clicked to open the text box, and her frown grew even deeper. “Insufficent space? Overwriting data? What the hell is thaTTttTTTtts’psd-” Suddenly, her voice broke, crackling into static as red lines spread out over her skin and her clothes. Alarmed, the goddess jumped up- only to find herself freezing in place, trapped and forced to watch as the editor she’d been using began to try to fix the issue she’d caused.

The first sign of where things were going was her hair lengthening down to her waist and turning blonde. That should not have been a part of making her chest bigger, but her overzealousness had made things rather complicated. Her dress turning green, also unexpected, and her rage spiked when she saw the emblem of Leanbox appear on it. But all in all, fixable problems.

It was when the screen started flashing again, this time with another error message, that she started to get worried instead of mad. ‘Searching for resources to reallocate’ wasn’t something any CPU wanted to see. A display listing their stats that was highlighting their intelligence in red was even lower on the list!

Error! Space required for Leanbox Loyalty.

Her Int score dropped 20 points.

“Oh!” Blanc’s eyes crossed, eyelids fluttering as she felt a powerful force roll through her head, remoulding and reshaping her mind into a different form. What… What did it mean, space required for Leanbox loyalty? Leanbox was the greatest nation in Gamindustri! She didn’t need to… Uh… Wait…

Before the blonde could puzzle that out, though, another message flashed up.

Error! Space required for Haughty Attitude.

Her Int score dropped another 20 points!

“Oooohhhohohoho…” The divine maiden couldn’t help but giggle and puff up her chest as that warm feeling once again rumbled through her. A haughty attitude? That was silly! She was, like, totally modest and stuff, y’know? Even if she was classier than all the other CPUs…

Oh, um. The screen was flashing again.

Error! Space required for Giant Boobs!

60 points!

… Uh oh.

Blanc grit her teeth, knowing instinctively that this was going to be bad, but it did no good. This time the change hit her like her own hammer cracking down on a mob’s head. All at once she felt the rush, her eyes going wide and her lips curling into a surprised O as her brains swirled down from her head to her tits. And boy did she have tits now! Swelling out from A to C to DD to GG and even beyond as they soaked up her reallocated disk space, straining her lovely Leanbox style dress even though it had been designed to contain exactly these kinds of assets! Oh yes, no one would be calling her flat now!

… Uh. Like, wait a sec though. Why would anyone ever call her flat anyways? Giggle! She had the largest boobs next to her big sister Vert!

Wait… N-no, that wasn’t right… Was it? The bimbified blonde held her head, her mind whirling, trying to make sense of the strange conflicting memories in her head… Which meant she ended up missing the last message to flash up on the computer she’d been working at.

Corrections made. Smoothing over syntax conflicts.

Another wave ran through Blanc – this time, a soothing, gentle one. She sighed happily as it washed through her, all of her worries vanishing, all of her strange memories dissolving into nothing. What had she just been thinking about? Some weird brown haired girl from Lowee? Heehee, that was dumb~

Huh, where was she, anyway? And what had she been doing here? The big breasted blonde looked around the dark office, her lips forming a confused pout, before shrugging. Eh, probably nothing important. And it was totally boring, whatever it was! Time to get out of here and see what her wonderful big sister was up to…!

Naturally, as she got up and skipped away, the new Blanc paid absolutely no attention to the screen she left behind – nor the new profile displayed upon it.

‘Leanbox CPU Candidate Blanc’, it read, displaying her stats and a short summary of her character. Her Int was, understandably, shockingly low, but her Cha was pretty damn good! ‘Blanc is the adorable, if slightly pompous, twin of Vert. The younger of the two by a few seconds, she is the nation’s dedicated Little Sister, and is doted on by the nation’s CPU. Often jealous of the other candidates for ‘stealing Big Sis’s attention!’, she’s a sweet, if dim girl at heart, and packs quite a wallop with the hammer she keeps hidden in her chest…’

After all that, Blanc had the bigger chest that she wanted, though it was hard to say if it was worth it. Still, she’d quickly find herself treasured by Vert once she got back home, and all thoughts of this strange little trip would be soon forgotten.

And no one was ever going to call her flat again.

Actually, come to think about it… Maybe it was worth it after all!

-

Request: Unity - Lori "Sonicheart" Hamilton, soundwave-specialized superheroine, has to outwit a mind-controlled Strike to save her from the clutches of the latest local villainess! This could be a much harder challenge if Strike weren't in a maid outfit that severely limits how much she can use her powers... (Strike even pointed this concern out, but was ignored. She might be a bit chuffed about that.)

My name is unimportant. What matters, is the name people know me by – Sonicheart, the Soundwave Superhero. Using the abilities granted to me by the wind elemental that powers my cybernetic heart – and oh god, trust me, it is a long story – I can control powerful or discrete vibrations in the materials around me. Which means I can make my voice heard on the other side of a continent, or I can perform a gentle sonic ultrasound at the drop of a hat. The variance between those two poles is pretty dramatic, so I have to be pretty careful not to let loose and break more than I mean to – but yeah, I can handle myself in a fight. That’s why I’m proud to serve as a member of Unity, and play whatever role I have to in protecting this planet.

(My actual name is Lori though, if you were wondering!)

At approximately twelve noon local time, city X (I figure I shouldn’t get too specific, so’s people don’t get upset) dropped off the map. Not literally, of course, but figuratively it was a black hole. All communications going in our out vanished. Same with all the people and transports. With no warning, it went completely silent – and so did anyone going in to investigate.

It wasn’t long before Unity was called in to lead the investigation, and what we found wasn’t good. There was a field of energy over the entire city, a sonic signal that was clearly having some kind of effect on the inhabitants. Anyone who heard it was affected, being lured deeper into the city, and out of range of those outside.

This was, as we call it in the heroing line of work, a problem. And fortunately, it was one I had a solution to – at least in part. Since the signal was working in soundwave form, I was uniquely equipped to protect myself and investigate the city proper. I couldn’t bring anyone with me, of course, but I could enter the energy field – and to be honest, that was more than anyone else could do right then.

Right, that should be enough setup. We’ll skip the hours and hours I spent wandering around an entire freaking city, because that was a long while going with no clues, I’ll tell you right now. I found a few people, sure, but none of them responded to me when I spoke – they just seemed to be wandering the streets aimlessly. Kind of like one of those zombie stories, really – but, you know, less undead grossness.

Anyway, I eventually found the problem. It wasn’t even that hard to spot, really. A giant radio dish, like the ones they used to use to try and contact aliens, remember them? Yeah, someone had installed one of those on the roof of their house. Or, rather, their mansion. That was the source of the signal. Easy to fix, right?

Well, no, not exactly. I, ah… I kinda forgot to mention one detail about the city this happened in. See, it was the home city of another member of Unity – one we’d lost contact with when the city went dark. And now… Now was when I found her.

Wham

“Hey Lori! How’ve you been?”

“St-Strike?!”

Yep. Lightning Strike. Unity’s speedster, and an absolute nightmareto have to fight – trust me, I’ve had to do it a few times, and usually on the wrong side of the good vs evil line at the time. This one would be an exception.

The first thing that struck me – I mean, after she did, when she knocked me down at the entrance to the mansion – was what she was wearing. It was a maid outfit, like one of those old fashioned French things? Frills and aprons and lace? Yeah, one of those. She even had her red hair tied up in a bun under the tiara. Not going to lie, she looked pretty cute – but do not tell her I said that. She never takes it well.

Of course, Strike is usually pretty grumpy these days – she didn’t use to be, but, uh, I’d say the pressures of the job got to her eventually, yeah. So seeing her bright and smiling was kind of shocking, to say the least.

“Wha- what are you doing? Why’d you hit me?” Normally that kind of question wouldn’t need asking – especially since she was clearly under some kind of mind control, just like the rest of this city. But since she wasn’t pressing the attack further, and was honestly even acting friendly, I felt I’d best take the chance. If she started trying to punch me again, I was in for a bad time.

She seemed to take it well. “Oh, sorry – you were about to track mud in on Mistress’s carpet, and she left strict orders that I was to keep the place clean and tidy until she get back. She even said I had to stay in the maid uniform! Don’t I look cute?”

“Um… Y-yeah.” Right. Process that information. Okay. “So this Mistress of yours…”

“I’m not to answer questions about the Mistress.” Strike’s voice dropped into a low monotone as she spoke for a moment – and then she shook her head, and was back to her (disturbingly) cheerful self. “Besides, she’s not in at the moment. I offered to take here wherever she wanted to go, but I’dve had to take the maid outfit off, and she ordered me not to, so…”

I paused, squinting at her. “Why would you have to take the maid outfit off?” I mean, maybe that was a weird thing to ask, but it was a weird thing to say, so…

The speedster sighed. “Because I can’t use my powers in it. I go too fast, normal clothes like these catch fire, and I’m not allowed to damage it. It kinda sucks, you know? It makes cleaning go super slowly.”

Interesting. “Wait. So. Your Mistress has forbidden you to take off or damage your uniform…?”

“Yep!” She smiled brightly.

“… And while you’re wearing it, you can’t use your powers?”

“Not most of them!” She shrugged. “I have to be really careful. It’s such a pa- hey, what are you doing?”

“Just testing something out,” I said, concentrating on my core. Around me, the world was starting to vibrate, a low rumble echoing through the stone beneath my feet.

Strike wasn’t an idiot though, even if she was acting like kind of a ditz. She could tell I was winding up for an attack, and she looked pretty annoyed about it. “If you try to blast me,” she said, folding her arms, “I’m going to have to hit you again.”

“That’s fine,” I answered, lifting my hand and pointing it towards the roof. “I’m not aiming for you.”

I really have to thank the Mistress of the day – if she’d given Strike any freedom to use her powers, it wouldn’t have worked. There was a dozen ways the speedster could have stopped me – but not without damaging her uniform. So instead of me taking another sonic punch, or something blocking my attack, my sound blast cleaved the radio dish, and a good section of the entire roof, off the building with a crash.

The signal running through the city went silent. The energy field evaporated.

Strike doubled over, holding her head. Her groan was the one of a woman who’s woken up after drinking about five bottles of vodka the previous evening, and now was experiencing the consequences. “Ooohhh, I am going to have words with that woman…”

She took a deep breath and flickered – then she was standing back in her usual armour. “Thanks Lori. Sorry about all that. Uh.” She looked away, kinda sheepish. “… I don’t suppose you can maybe not mention the maid outfit in your official report?”

I grinned. “Sure. That can be our little secret.”

Oh wait. Right. Uh. How about y’all just forget I said any of that, huh? Thankin’ you kindly.

Don’t worry – I’ve got plenty of other stories where she ends up even cuter~

-

Request: In a world where nobody died, the cast of DRV3 decide that ending Danganronpa isn’t enough. They have to send a message to the people who kept the killing games going for so long. Lucky for them, Miu has an idea that can do both that and punish Tsumugi for all the crap she put them all through: Turning the cosplay nerd into a completely brainless bimbo on live tv. Let’s see how she likes having her memories and personality screwed with.

“… Well that was unexpected.”

“Yeah. Who’dve seen such a completely random series of events happening? Kind of mind boggling.”

“I’m just glad everyone made it out alive somehow.”

“Yeah, but… We really can’t let anything like this happen again. I don’t care how popular this bullshit is, it has to end, here and now.”

“I think we all agree on that. The only question is how. I mean, we can end Danganronpa, sure, but is that going to get the message across? There are more like her out there.”

“Heh. Don’t worry about that. I’ve got a reaaaallly fun idea for this one.”

“… You’re not going to do anything too awful, right?”

“A-ah, well, I mean, if you don’t want me to I…”

“Hey, hey, no, I think she’s in the right this time. Besides, that one needs to face her punishment. Remember what she tried to do to you? What she did do to all of us?”

“… Yeah, actually, you’re right. Okay Iruma – do your worst.”

“Oh hell yeah, now you’re talking my fucking language!”

…

The camera flickered to life, the broadcast showing the image of Hope’s Peak Academy – one of the most famous images in the world. The site of the killing game, the home of Danganronpa. Yes, the audience knew it well.

But something was wrong. The sky over Hope’s Peak wasn’t supposed to be pink.

Soon, the image zoomed in, and another irregularity presented itself – one of the contestants in the killing game, arms and legs chained to the Academy’s logo, at the very top of the tower. Tsumugi Shirogane, the supposed Ultimate Cosplayer – but those chains weren’t costumes. No, she was bound tightly, suspended high up in the air, and familiar music was beginning to swell…

To a watcher of the show, it could only mean an execution was about to take place.

As the camera watched, things proceeded with the usual Dangan flourish – though, oddly, perhaps, there was no sign of any of the kumas this time. Knowing them, they’d all managed to destroy themselves again. That kind of thing happened a lot.

In keeping with the pink theme, a large drone rose up in front of the bound cosplay mistress, a bright pink spiral held steady before her eyes. Tsumugi just seemed confused by its presence though – after all, everyone knew a spiral was completely useless if it didn’t spin!

And no sooner had that look of confusion crossed her face, than the Hope’s Peak Logo, to which she was still securely chained, began to rotate. Slowly at first, then with increasing speed, the seamstress was spun head over heels again and again, eyes helplessly locked forward as the spiral – now every bit as twisty turny as it needed to be – filled her vision.

Was this the end?

Of course not! What kind of dull execution would that be? You had to give the victim a little hope, didn’t you? In this case, it took the form of a needle – a simple sewing needle, one that appeared in the Ultimate Cosplayer’s hand as if by magic! Such a trick was simple for someone like her, who spent her life making all kinds of fancy costumes. And just as simple was the fine, dexterous manipulation required to pick the lock holding these chains together! Yes! She was going to break free, and climb to safety using a roll of cloth, also magically summoned to her person via sheer ultimate skill.

Could it be she’d escape the killing game?

Buddy, if you believed that then this absent bear has an entire river’s worth of bridges to sell you! Ha! For no sooner had Tsumugi sprung the last lock binding her up, the wheel she was on suddenly stopped. And alas, the poor cosplayer, so intent on her escape, she never saw it coming. Dislodged from her hold, she slipped, and then plunged down from building, gravity yanking her straight towards an untimely doom.

But to her shock and surprise, she never hit the ground. Instead, she landed with a splash, in a deep pool of strange pink water that she didn’t recognise. Blinking, she paddled to the surface, trying to work out what was happening – only to realise, to her absolute horror, that her clothing was starting to melt.

It was though every fabric she wore, and several others that she only carried, had been dipped in the most caustic acid imaginable. Her uniform, her skirt, her bow, even her glasses dripped away, dissolving into nothingness all around her, and leaving her completely naked. The woman of infinite costumes, now reduced to none. Ah, but the fun wasn’t over. For before she could even properly comprehend what was happening – let alone realise that her naked body was being broadcast to millions – the pool into which she’d fallen became a lot less calm.

Indeed, it was like the plug had been pulled from its bottom. All of a sudden the pink waters began rushing, swirling and funnelling down into a large pipe down below. And caught in the whirlpool, all Tsumugi could do was splash and thrash as she was dragged down into the depths.

The pipes down below were transparent, and they showed that her trip on the way through them was anything but pleasant. Again and again she was thrown up against the sides, her breasts and her butt squishing flat against the surfaces. And an eagle eyed viewer could see as her trip went on that those boobs and that butt were starting to change, growing bigger and squishier the longer she remained submerged in that pink water.

By the time she finally popped out the other end at a lovely (fake) beach and fought her way to the surface, her breasts were huge – swinging like melons in a shopping bag as she stumbled to the shore. And her ass was clapping louder than the lap of the waves. Not to mention, of course, that her hair, once so glossy and dark, had turned bright blonde, and shone brighter than the summer sands she found herself standing on.

But surely that was it now? She had fought her way free. The spinning disk, the hypno wheel, the whirlpool, the pipes of doom – shockingly, all of it had failed to end Tsumugi Shirogane. And with no Monokuma here to finish the job, what could possibly stop her escape?

It seemed that Tsumugi had reached the same conclusion as she looked around, and saw nothing threatening to attack her. Cautiously, her arms came up to hide her expanded curves, but a small, smug smile was growing on her lips, and getting wider by the second. After a few seconds of nothing, even the music cutting out completely, she threw her head back to laugh-

-only to freeze in place as something shot up next to her head and jammed itself into her ear. Something that looked a lot like one of Miu Iruma’s modified remotes, with a pink, glowing, slimy attachment that was forcing its sticky way into her head. The Mastermind of the killing game shuddered, just once, eyes going wide…

… And then the remote began to thrust, pulling back before surging forward, pushing itself deeper and deeper into her brain. Tsumugi moaned, loudly and without any kind of restraint as her pupils began to swirl, turning into tight pink spirals just like the one that had drilled its way into her mind earlier, that now she no longer had the power to resist.

Another thrust, and her breasts pumped up even bigger, her tongue lolling out as she fell to her knees. Another, and her eyes crossed, now completely filled with pink spirals. One more, and her hands rose up, fingers raised in a V and a 3, just as the Hope’s Peak Emblem thudded down and embedded itself into the sands behind her – but now it was vandelised, its name crossed out, and replaced in big, pink letters:

Bimbo Peaks

Fittingly, its traditional shield had been replaced with a pair of breasts.

And finally, one last thrust, and Tsumugi Shirogane (who didn’t remember that name, or anything else, really) came, pink juices squirting out of her and onto the sands. Slowly, the camera zoomed in on her vapid, bimbo face - until the pink spirals were all the audience could see…

…

“Wow. How did you…?”

“Eh, I found a few cool tricks around the place – and then invented a ton of even cooler ones!”

“Remind me to never, ever underestimate you… So, uh… Do you think that shot at the end might bimbofy some of the audience, too?”

“…”

“…”

“…”

“Ah, who cares. They deserve it anyway.”

“Hell yeah.”