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T.O.P | SELF CRUCIFIXION + THE GIANT + Studio54 ❤️ (Patreon)

Published:
2026-04-16 13:10:09
Imported:
2026-10

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  • 647296003.mp4

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rainicity

I wasn't expecting you to listen to his album anytime soon, so thank you! And boy I have a lot to say about some of the songs. ------------------ Self-Crucifixion The 2nd half of the track are actual sound clips of news reporting on: -His marijuana controversy -His overdose from anxiety/sleep meds -Media covering his self-exit attempt outside the hospital, and his mother was basically forced to address it -Him being selected as one of the civilian astronaut for Elon Musk's DearMoon space project (later cancelled due to safety concerns) -Him blocking fan accounts tagging him on posts related to BIGBANG's 18th anniversary two years ago (and by the way, he's still doing that) -His return to the acting industry as Thanos in Squid Games 2, but the media still keeps labelling him as a problematic idol and criticizes him for taking that role (the character is a drug-addicted retired rapper who fell from grace) -The last sound clip is one of his last IG livestream where he was apologizing to the fans, and one of them asked him what he has been up to, and he replied "I make my music, our music." The Giant -The verse you focused on (the part where he talked about making mistakes with woman and music) is actually a reinterpretation of his rap verse in LOSER (as in, the lyrics and flow sound almost exactly the same, but he just slightly revised it to fit this song)! 🥹 -I think this is one of my favorite tracks in the album as well, but mainly because it's about him talking about how he overcame himself. Studio54 (there's a lot to dissect for this one) TOP's lyrics tend to have double meanings (much like GD) so your interpretations about him chasing that "high" and cutting them off could be right too! Here is my interpretation of the song: -"I had a nightmare chasing that high": I took it as a more figurative meaning - he was chasing for fame as an idol, but it consumed him instead. -"I've cut them off! Bang! Bang!": This is likely talking about how he cut off all contact with the BIGBANG members. "Bang! Bang!" could be a reference to BANG BANG BANG as well. Personally I believe this is his farewell song for the BIGBANG members because the lyrics feel quite bittersweet. He basically talked about how the fans were hurt by his actions from the controversy and him leaving the group ("My fans, torn apart, scars all over") and his decision to give up the fame of being a BIGBANG member for freedom in music ("Traded my Prada kicks for these Vans"), and eventually drawing a line by saying that he loved his time with the group, but it's over ("I'm so sorry but I loved / My twenties BIGBANG, say less"). The lyrics "I'm so sorry but I loved" is also a reference to BIGBANG's Lies ("I'm so sorry but I love you"). He also talked about how he knew that the members needed him, but he just wants to be free from the idol life ("You need me / But I just want to be free / Walking away from you feels kinda sweet")... I think it's very clear by this point that he is just done with the group and ready to move on. Still, I want to clarify that it doesn't mean he hates them! Like I mentioned in the Coachella video, he said in an interview that he had to leave them and cut off contact because he didn't want his scandal to ruin the other members' reputation. He also said that looking at BIGBANG group photos reminds him of a broken family and it makes him very sad, that's why he has been blocking accounts tagging him in BIGBANG related content. And also a not-so-fun fact: A few hours before he dropped the MV for Studio54, he reposted an IG story that showed a painting called The Lovers - it depicts two lovers who love each other but cannot be physically intimate as they are both separated by a cloth mask. ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Lovers_(Magritte) ) I think that's a very clear message that he still loves the group and the members even though he cannot be with them 😔 At the outro, he also mentions the phrase "Dirty Sun". A lot of people are speculating that it is a direct jab at the Burning Sun scandal which basically tarnished the group's legacy. I agree with that, and I think that incident (along with his own controversy) is one of the reasons why he decided to leave the group and go on a journey of self-discovery (as he said in the lines "They just ruined my soul / That's where I got great new Moon inspiration"). ‐------------------ When I heard Studio54 for the first time, I was crying while jamming to the song LOL I mean I was already crying since the first track because the news sound clips literally gave me flashbacks of when I first read about his overdose online and I went to bed everyday praying that I wouldn't wake up to bad news, then I teared up again when he sang his LOSER rap verse in The Giant (LOSER is one of my favorite songs from BIGBANG). Studio54 is such a bop but the lyrics are so depressing, I hate that I understand some Korean because I feel like I'm dancing on my OT4 grave every day listening to this song 🤣 By the way, the Studio54 MV is a mash up of two songs (Studio54 + ADHD), so you might want to watch it only after listening to it (it's the 6th song on the tracklist). The MV is a very interesting experience and will help you understand Studio54 better in my opinion 😉 And in case you didn't know by now, TOP is also very fascinated with the moon and space (other than art and chairs), so you will be getting a lot of references to those two things in the album (not just in the lyrics, but also how his music sounds) 😆 Thank you for your reaction as always, and I can't wait for you to check out the rest of the album!

enhaa_❤️

could you check out the new zip daesang episode, ep.103 with nct wish. (just abit of knowledge of nct wish, they are the last sub unit of nct they were announced as the last unit in 2024 as they debuted and are the youngest unit, nct has (nct 127, wayv, nct dream, nct wish, and a rotational unit called nct-u where different members from the other units come together for songs)❤️ https://youtu.be/KF9GyP8ypcg?si=pFJslth1O93SufEe