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Sexuality, taking a break & the hardest times of our lives | Patreon Ep. 93 (Patreon)

Published:
2026-06-21 15:00:11
Imported:
2026-06

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willa

happy suit sunday it is way too fucking hot

sid

was going to watch the patreon first but this feels too intense ill see you in 58 minutes

Leno

my first time watching the patreon first, someone hold my hand

CraftyCole

we're eating good with this one patreonners

sid

im back

Leno

I think with the perception anxiety and OCD, withdrawing from the internet is probably making it worse in a way because the best treatment against OCD is exposure therapy - obviously that's not for every case but it's just something I found interesting

olivia_ln1

Every week just before the main episode ends, I quickly go to the patreon episode and try and sync them so it starts as the main episode ends. So far, ive only done it successfully once.

harpy

“ask us the juicy stuff” i think we just don’t want to put you guys in an uncomfortable position

Dog

wheres the mini set now?

igglepiggle

I simultaneously found this to be one of the funniest and most emotional episodes yet. I dont think ive ever commented before but Jack's "worst period of life" answer was extremely profound to me. I experienced very similar difficulties of significant life events at the same age but not having the words, experience , or knowledge to fully understand them until recently, and so i have also felt the clouds part in my head. Icl it did make me tear up hearing someone who's of a similar age to me that ive followed closely for the best part of 6 years put something into words that ive not quite been able to put my finger on, so i really do appreciate the candor, it was very impactful to say the least. Both Tom and Jack sharing their experiences with mental health problems has been incredibly helpful to me, and it feels weird to say thank you for that but ig thats what im getting at. I love love love this podcast so much, it's one of VERY few pieces of media (or just people in general) that actually makes me laugh out loud on a very regular basis which is very good for the soul, but the deep stuff connects with my heart, never thought two funny internet men would make me feel so seen :) . keep doing what yous are doing, and what makes you happy, and thanks

max

As someone who is 19 and hearing what Jack said about anxiety and that weird state sense he was 11, i don’t think i’ve ever related more because jesus. Whenever you have something so nothing happen to you, but ur little brain for some reason processes it all of wack it does really stick with you.

Hollie

quite possibly my favourite episode of the Patreon so far, very refreshing to hear both be so real and can definitely resonate with a lot of the feelings also being in my 20s. Jacks explanation of the worst period of his life put words to feelings I wouldn’t even know how to express, vulnerability I appreciate in a world that has become so false. thank you :)

caleighfornia

i did NOT expect to hear my questions as i was driving home from work lol. also its pronouced callie </3 but all is well and i hope jack takes a good break!!! i love the deep episodes

Marcy Woolmer

Leaving a comment so I can say I was here at some point

Amy_arb

I never comment on anything ever but I just wanted to say that this episode has made me quite emotional in the fact that you guys have spoken on most of the things that have been effecting my life at the moment. This Patreon has helped me loads and I think it is the best thing (for me) on the internet at the moment! You guys are amazing and thank you for being so open 🫶 it helps people more than you think

gprim

I really relate to the like growing up a not really like homophobic but not completely accepting town and now having mostly queer friends. Like it’s not that I’m homophobic and I have even been questioning myself even for a bit. But my hometown is like oh btw that person is gay as if it had to be said but like it didn’t it’s just who they are you know. Now whenever I think about it it’s like it always in the back of my mind from where I grew up. Cuz even when Tommy was like my dad was talking about people identifying at non-binary I really also didn’t know that people were coming out at that time. Idk how to explain lowkey.

Sheepy

Thank you for making me doing my art much more fun.

Sheepy

Tommy. It is very possible you have ocd, I have it and the way you’re describing your worst ever moment it sounds very similar to stuff I experience. I love how you describe your words and present yourself. It helps others that could be struggling realise that their problems arent always so isolated.

Tessa C

I connect with what was said during the sexuality section. I've tried to explain it, I consider myself a lesbian but I'm not fully opposed to having a vague relationship with a man

Jay

It's very nice to hear you both speak so earnestly and openly about Queerness and how despite identifying as "straight" you won't completely deny the option. I feel as though it's a healthy way to approach sexuality and I wish it was more common especially with straight people :)

ames

i think you guys should do a miniseries called tom tries where tom tries loads of jobs for a day bc he’s never had a ‘normal’ job (not trying to minimise the amount of hard work he’s done i just think it’s probs quite different to working in hospitality or education etc and would be interesting to see how he fares)

EsenWho

I believe in you

EsenWho

I wish it's Winter in Australia 😔

EsenWho

For the record I don't think anybody is 100% straight. Every single straight person has admired at least one other of the same sex

Cloud

People talk about removing labels in terms of sexuality and gender but I feel like not everyone, especially people who consider themselves straight, don't fully understand what that means. I have a theory that nobody is fully straight or fully gay. The way I see it, if I fall in love with someone, I fall in love with them, and it doesn't matter what that means. I've dated men and women, as a man that is a predominant sexual attraction to women's traits however thise attractions can exist simultaneously to traits of any gender. So don't try to put yourself is a category, it's a good way to live, the closest label is pansexual, otherwise you're conditioning yourself to not love someone you could fall in love and be happy with

penny

25:00 I've never heard anyone else talk about this before but I think i went through something similar. I just got really sad when I was 11 for not really any reason, and at the time I think I said i was depressed but I didn't really know what that actually meant because i mean, I was 11. I'm 17 now and talking to my friend who actually does have depression and I'm not sure if that's what it was. The fog lifting is a really great way to explain it, I'll feel super clear for a few weeks and it genuinely feels like I'm regaining consciousness but then it gets a it foggy again. anyway this just really resonated with me so thank you Jack

anneliese 💕🧚🏻‍♀️

one of the reasons why these types of patreon episodes are my favourite is not only because getting to see tom and jack be so vulnerable on the podcast is such an admirable thing, even when you might not know exactly how you're even feeling yet and how to express it properly, but it is also so nice to see how tom will sit there in silence, completely listening to every word jack says. literally just having someone there to listen as closely as tom does is so freeing and can often help to better articulate yourself while actually talking to someone else, and also allows you to have those realisations in real time that you otherwise mightn't have had about your genuine thoughts and feelings. or at least in my experience. much love guys ❤️

Ray4Real

Who else remembered the human centipede thing

sofiafried

It was so much easier before they added the “still to come” which is cool and great for those not on the Patreon but I think I ruins the whole syncing gimmick

sophia

Jack explained perfectly the way that i have been feeling since i was 15. I got no clue what happened in my life, but my best guess is that when the pandemic started, a part of my brain realized that anyone can die at any moment and there isn’t ALWAYS a right away cure for everything. ever since ive felt like i am “numb” to those type of situations, kind of like my brain doesn’t want to process the thought of death or the fact that something so small can turn into literally a world wide issue. this was an amazing patreon episode :)))

Emily Landon

For Jack about why you suddenly stopped having that underlaying worrying feeling: the same happened with me and around the time I too was diagnosed with ADHD. And I think that suddenly you have this genuine reason as to why you feel like this. And it makes you feel better about it and for me has really calmed it all down. Just a thought 🤷‍♀️

Jamie

I really related to Jack this episode both with the sexuality and having an intense emotional experience at about 11 and that numbness I’m not Jacks age and I don’t fully think I’ve moved out of it but Jack talking about this has really helped me. So Jack thank you very much to help understand myself and not feeling alone about it.

Jaimee

The music choices slap so hard! Also loving the change to the horoscopes I think the star rating and the over all mood so so funny

Jaimee

My lord Jack made me cry

Rachel

“Ask us juicy stuff” buddy I did but you didn’t read it 🧑‍🦯‍➡️

willa

ain’t no way they finally read one of my questions and then got distracted and started singing chocolate rain ffs

willa

NEVERMIND FORGET EVERYTHING I SAID JACK YOU LEGEND

Sophie

I think the words you're looking for when you were talking about why you made the podcast and making yourself look like an 'asshole' on purpose are actually just showing that you are a human and you make mistakes. You can make poor decisions and learn from them; you can say the wrong thing or do something wrong, and it just means you are a human, like every single other person on this planet.

Moth

I also struggle with a constant sense of dread, personally, I've linked it to a mix of adhd and anxiety, the brain constantly going even in the backround and just getting scared over things. It's interesting to hear about something to similar because ive never heard anyone talk about it before. It's comforting to know someone was able to get out of it because i thought i just had to live like that until i died. I think it also reached a peak when I was very young (9) and its crazy to hear about from another perspective on possibly the same issue

Plonkie

the whole human centipede story has been told before 🫪

Anna ✨️

Jack your not alone, mental health is so confusing for oneself and it takes time to understand it. good on you for coming to notice and slowing learning and addressing it.

zara.mp3

“✨🎵ooonnn🎶✨”

bea

guh

rique_nc

yeah lads this one can go down as one of the best patreon episodes easily

Bo

I love these kinds of episodes, because every time Jack starts speaking about his own mental health and journey I see a bit of myself in it. I have some sort of brain imbalance (undiagnosed so I won’t put any names) that makes things seem very very scary unless I have a map of how to do it and where I’ll end up, so hearing similar experiences but from someone who’s a bit ahead of me in figuring them out is very helpful. Thank you boys for your honesty and vulnerability in this episode. I hope Jack’s break treats him well and can’t wait to see what he’ll have in store for us when he comes back. ❤️

AIKORKEM

I really like when you talk about sexualities and queerness. It’s really fascinating hearing about your different backgrounds and such with the LGBTQ. When I was younger, I always wondered who I was.

baileygobrr

was going to comment a very similar thing just now. i've turned 18 last year and have only recently started really thinking about my life and my feelings and ive realised ive been doing something really similar, just kinda shutting away any emotions i didnt want to feel and supressing parts of myself i didnt like etc. it is mental to think about and it was refreshing hearing some1 else have a similar sort of experience

Rylee

I’m late to comment, long time watcher, recent pod watcher. I just really wanna say how inspiring this episode is and the podcast as a whole. I don’t think it’s the right words, but I love just how humanizing the podcast is. To be able to hear about your experiences and struggles is so helpful. I’ve never felt so understood in the way I have when Jack explained how he feels about his sexuality, and his struggles mentally. I had almost the same thing happen to me at 11 (seemed entirely out of nowhere at the time) and while there have been ups and downs I still don’t feel truly out of it and I’m so glad Jack has made it to that place where he finally feels happy. It gives me hope that maybe one day I can be too.

mavussy

purple rain is a weed stain isn’t it lol

elliot_was_here

jack's explanation of the canon "year six to year seven" event that so many neurodivergent people experience but feel isn't important enough to ever bring up is genuinely the best thing to me. this podcast is amazing, thanks guys :)

elliot_was_here

the discovery of Bad in the world and our own mortality are two terrifying things that people expect young children to just deal with. the knowledge of nothing being permanent is harrowing especially when life events sort of confirm that worry

elliot_was_here

ive already commented on this episode twice but this is my favourite episode of this pod ever so thank you guys :)

cheezywig

I've always wanted to get into content creation, but I was afraid my severe anxiety and adhd would prevent me from achieving something like that. Its impossibly reassuring to hear that Jack experienced something similar. Trauma can alter every aspect of life and its a difficult pit to dig yourself out of, because its indescribable. Everyone who has experienced something similar, you're not alone. One day at a time, it gets easier.

Poppy

a lot of people have said similar things in the comments but just wanted to put something about what jack said about the emotional break at 11, as i had the exact same thing. it’s not something i’ve ever really been able to articulate, and i still very much feel like i’m in the numbed out period, but hearing that someone else has been thru the same thing, and then looking thru the comments and seeing even more people is so nice. thank u for sharing ♥️

Merlin

I'm so late to this episode but what jack said about having a breakdown at 11 sounds a lot like ADHD burnout. I went through a similar thing

Alice

This was an insane listen at work. I have never heard anyone describe my experiences as well as Jack did here. Also he gets that part about not being able to really even explain it all. This past year I have really started to feel a lot better and like myself again so I'm glad to hear that Jack is also doing better!

Izzi

I came to the comments for the same reason! I didn’t really relise that this is a normal feeling and other people would have felt like me in this. Very comforting to know :)