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CLUB ELLEN - APRIL 13, 2024 (Patreon)

Published:
2024-04-13 04:54:27
Imported:
2026-06

Downloads

  • CLUB ELLEN - 12 April 2024.mp3

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Content

Content Warning — there is a lot of VISCERA discussed in this show...all throughout...SORRY!!

Going on Sloppy Seconds, $55 massage, cuck gay gay and his tranny fucker friend, Macy's tooth experience, Trump's inevitable win, crouching down in a woman's locker room, Chappell Roan, parasocial relationship to podcasts, Michael Haneke (again), porno theater in Jackson Heights, Folie a Deux trailer.

Files

Comments

downwithaustin

Late night club Ellen just when I was about to start gooning. You ladies know just what the doctor ordered. Happy LanaChella

EJ

Heads Carolina, tails California, somewhere greener, somewhere HORNIER for middle of the night Club Ellen!!

madison

so glad i dont have to sleep behind the wheel tonight during my haul <3

Globcast

Cock tent warning

Thomas

On the subject of podcasts, have you ever listened to Lady Bunny and Bianca del Rio on Derek and Romaine? It’s wild. Also would love to know what podcasts you’re listening to, I travel a lot for work (since, of course, I’m a long-haul trucker in the flyover country) so I have lots of empty silence to fill

randy gooner

as a pseudo chappell roan enjoyer it is actually so refreshing to just listen to you ladies be haters. it has been such a fucking COCK of a week just fucking me in my ass so thank you for putting balmex on my orifice oh my god touch me right there

Zach Defense

I saw the thumbnail for the Chappell Roan tiny desk and said out loud to myself "I don't need to know about that"

Grady

Dental talk giving me horrible anxiety about my receding gums and cavities

Garrett Mabel

Stroking my open cavity, number 33.back right molar. Bout to get in there with a twig from the yard.

Zachary

Not to be too needy but is there any update on a 2nd LA show. I am in SF and want to book a flight/hotel to come heckle y’all 💕

Sia Furler

Chapell Roan makes music for bisexual girls with boyfriends

momrom

You may be thinking of Buca di Beppo! Although boca famously means mouth, buca means hole, and that hole is the pope room.

Pe er

Omg macyyy- I feel your pain had a gum graft recently and discovered half my gums were scoring in the 5-12 category. Make sure you’re using an electric toothbrush to clean along your gum line, a long handled tuft toothbrush to clean your back teeth, and cleaning nightly with TePe interdental brushes - I had to spend thousands in a Harley street clinic to find this out 😤🦷😬

Ann_Dowd_Stan_69

Talking weird sexual experiences, my friend once told me about a client who would fantasise about her wearing him like a skirt. She asked what that would be like, eg. Would you like to be inside the lining of the skirt…he told her he would want his skin to be the skirt… fully accepting he’d need to be die for that to happen. I’m not one to kink shame, but, It’s all shits n giggles till someone giggles n shits.

Roople

Speaking from personal experience - using blood as lube doesn't work. It dries too quickly and just becomes uncomfortable after like two minutes

Dip

Will the sloppy seconds live show be uploaded anywhere to be consumed?

Tati Beauty Puff

not to be a horrible bitch but when I saw Chappel roans tiny desk performance and the lipstick on her teeth and her horribly overrot emoting and the disgusting makeup I actually wanted to walk into traffic. let's just say I hope she's doing it for the fun of it

Henry

Oh boy my martini hangover + gum chat evoking some interesting sensations

Henry

The secretary sketch was so funny

Alex G

Had a similar experience where a dentist was like well… “we’ll do all we can to help you from losing all your teeth from gum disease. :)” after swapping dentists, i got an electric toothbrush, anti-gingivitis mouth wash, and flossed frequently. My gum measurements improved in 4 months. its not so doom and gloom in the end and im glad ur better macy 🩵

adiah

me screaming “FAZZOLI’S” like you can hear me

jiejie

the lipstick on the teeth is what made me fall in love with her

Brody

Theda were you thinking of Maggiano’s Little Italy? The TJ Maxx of Italian chain restaurants.

Glen

Also excited to see Harleen Quinzel on the big screen - just discovered the director has basically only also directed Joker 1 and all the Hangover movies??? To which I ask….is Bradley behind this somehow? (Keep meaning to call in to talk about Bradley Cooper but not sure if that’s a good or bad idea lmk)

jiejie

I would take a bullet up the ass for Chappell Roan

Luke

On podcasts, I think it’s a very post-Covid “consumable human connection” thing, and like the caller I have also realized how much I almost rely on them to get through the day, but at least it’s not crack!

Luke

Personal fav part of the piano teacher: when she’s walking around the drive in theater in her horned stupor and pisses immediately when watching a couple make out

Coffin Flop

Standing beej? Not in Dark Brandon woke America.

Reese

Same

Lilith

R u on prep (truvada)? It gave me gum recession and bone loss… super rare but possible

Oats

Was Theda thinking of Carraba’s?

Beth Jerky

re: the ru and michelle pod - michelle yelled at me on twitter for calling her out about telling people that tap water would kill them and she said "I NEVER SAID I WAS A DOCTOR". also loved when she'd freely share information about her teenage daughter's mental illnesses lol.

Beth Jerky

switch to an extra soft brush and don't brush too hard. therabreath 'healthy gums' rinse and sensitive/gum toothpaste - haven't had sensitive gums for months

Terry Gross

Not mad but disappointed that my Chappell Roan call did not make air

Maddie M

Theda are you thinking of Fazoli’s💀

Beth Jerky

Macy - please make a cover of Olivia N John's "physical" but it's "visceral" - let me see that body ooze!

Patrick Totally

Ok yeah I can definitely see how Triangle of Sadness is what Haneke looks like to people who don't like Haneke. Every movie by both of those guys could be condensed into a solid episode of American Dad. Haven't seen Happy End but I'll probably like it.

Terry Gross

I’d love to pick you ladies bowls sometime!

gay sully

Just saw stress positions at Lincoln center !!!! So proud of you and congratulations!!! It was additionally such a *wonderful feeling* to experience greased up freak’s film sync debut (as far as I’m aware) hehe 💗💗💗💗

nymphowarsxxx

⁉️ yes i am! How did you know it was due to the prep?

momrom

Missed the in episode mention of buca 😔

Ethan

coming out of my goon cave to say I TOO HAVE FAILED THE GUM MEASURING TEST AT SOME POINT and that bitch surely did read my gum numbers out lout to somebody 😭 so embarrassing

Ethan

omg bertuccis

Ethan

kntry.goon and enter code PUSS at checkout

Ethan

reformed swifties who are overcompensating type teas

Ethan

KEEP TAPPING THOSE GUMS btw

Isaac

Pastinis?

hoskuld compulsories

a loop of macy singing 'i cant wait' is what sooths me while i apply tooth-water and wait to be nuked

Natalie

You two are now retelling stories from a few years ago with added details. And the other doesn’t remember. 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰 I don’t want to say it’s trixie&katya coded, but it’s bringing similar warmth and familiarity. Love ya gals.

Beth Jerky

It might be the smoking … 💅🏻 You can make it to two weeks!!! Go Macy!

Calcutta

I went to see Madonna last week and she refuses to perform with the A/C on. It was sooooo hot and I sweated so much that I got an abscess in my shaven armpit and had to have it drained at the doctor lol

Lilith

It’s probs the smoking. I knew it was the prep bc I started 6 months ago and I take good care of my teeth and the dentist said there was no reason for me to have receding gums or tooth pain. Now I just do event based + condoms. All gum pain has stopped

Luke

So I’m guessing you ladies have not seen any porn vids in which people scrape their assholes with wire brushes and toothbrushes to get them all bloody so they can get into aids play and blood play. Or a condom made of sharp metal mesh.

Luke

Will you please review the 1990’s classic movie Milk Money for us? Please?!

Luke

A public dark room is an idea I’ve had for years! In a big city there should be noise-cancelling dark rooms with noise-cancelling headphones if one chooses to listen to music or sounds and there would be a huge choice of sounds and music to listen to. I wish a city would do this.

Luke

For the sake of people who need to destress.

kalzonkly

Can u plz bring the waterpick to the LA show I will pay CASH!!!!! 💵💵💵!!!!!!!!

liam

Chappell roan is literally maddy morphosis

The Fruit Flies

I have heard from a reliable source that John Mayer is into scat! Maybe this is what sexual napalm means to him

kalzonkly

You can give it away for free or I will pay a crisp 20... but no more!!!!!

Elizabeth

We need an SF show! During Folsom!

Zachary

Omg yes. I will gladly attach a radio to my harness and broadcast at the sex party 📻

Elizabeth

I feel like this is kinda a thing in Asia with the internet cafes that have private stalls (also great for cock stroking)

Cara

Was at the Sloppy Seconds recording - half if not more of those people were outright liars and thieves of our time! Shame on all of them

Caitlin C.

ordered a water pick immediately after listening to this… that’s the parasocial power of podcasts !

bailey

THANK U FOR ANSWERING MY CALLS AFTER ALL THESE YEARS 😭😭😭

mado

re:para social relationships, I simultaneously live for and dread when you guys tease listeners/audience members I'm like haha got em wait fuck that's me--

serwin

⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ a fun listen while brushing and flossing!

Joe B

I sure hope one day Theda rips SNL apart on the show. Or at least remarks upon how a show so obviously bad could go on for FIFTY YEARS.

gal

was SCREAMING bertuccis

andy

My gums went from a 5 to a 3 in about a year with an electric tooth brush using in the morning and night and alternating waterpicking and flossing! I also had to have those deep gum cleanings every 3 months. You got this!!!

Jack Harrison-Quintana

Why does Theda have a New York accent ONLY for the word “uncomfortable”?

Michael

I think the glass was broken in anger

Luke

Pastini!!!