Chapter 279: More Than a Pretty Face (Patreon)

On his travels, William Oh was spotted by a flight of Harpies. The birds tried to lure him to their lair with their siren song where they would devour him, but William Oh was far too clever.

He outfoxed the bird-women, stripping them of their feathers and leaving them wanting more.

-          Jason Salazar

**Edward Nakos, level 67 High Priest**

The Speaker of the High Saint’s Council, Edward Nakos, pushed his old bones out of bed, shoving aside the existential dread that crashed down on him every morning.

I’m the last Speaker. The end times are upon us, and we have already los-

Edward chopped the thought off and turned his mind to his daily tasks.

Sixty-five years in the office of The Speaker had everything down to a well-oiled machine.

His page noticed his movement and brought in Edward’s sandals, which had been warming in the sun.

The thought brought another wince of guilt. The frozen wilds beyond were frozen because the church had been quietly taking their stars and turning them into weapons of war for generations in preparation for the end of the Coil.

And yet, despite all their preparations, they had failed to kill the Deceiver, and worse, failed to keep the Prophet. The Prophet now served the Deceiver himself, proselytizing the worship of William Oh on the 5th Floor.

What a nightmare.

Not only that, the agent of chaos had effectively broken the spine of their army, killing their highest-level Paladin, putting a major dent in their ground-level forces, smearing their reputation and scaring the rest of the High Council so badly that the old cowards basically just rolled over.

Not that Edward was any different, having changed their policy from ‘Extermination’ to ‘Watch and Rebuild’

Soon the sky will split asunder and the demons will pour in. The people of the Ring will be slaughtered. All we can do now is try to guide the people to the new holy land and sow the seeds for a better Coil.

…Except Caddock made us look like unfeeling monsters, so less civilians are going to listen when the times comes, indirectly killing millions of people who could have preserved skills, knowledge and traditions, which will have ripple effects for tens of thousands of years.

The bastard had been talented in war.  Politics, not so much.

Edward was in a bad mood. After a long, illustrious career, his entire job was now doing damage control because a hound slipped the leash, rather than saving the world from Chaos.

“Your first meeting of the day has been postponed. It is no longer the Halifae matriarch.”

“Eh?” Edward grunted, peering up at his page as he put his sandals on. The boy looked a little green around the gills.

“It’s now a meeting with…umm…William Oh.”

“Fuck!” Edward barked, standing up straight, feeling as if he’d been doused in ice-water.

“Are we sure it’s the right one?” Edward asked as he struggled to get dressed, his page helping the silk robes onto edward’s withered frame.

“Yes, Speaker.”

“He’s here?”

“Yes, Speaker.”

“Can we take him?”

“The High Saints have mixed views on it. The general consensus is that we could, but the estimate on casualties…varies.”

“Then don’t bother. Let’s see what The Deceiver wants first.”

No matter how he thought about it, it couldn’t have been anything good. But still. Better to know first before making plans.

“A shower first, Speaker? The water is already heated.”

Edward opened his mouth to refuse, then thought better of it, sniffing his bed-robe. Better not to look like a desperate, smelly old man.

“We’ll have to make it fast,” Edward muttered.

**William Oh**

Bone Mountain was the beating heart of the Church of Granesh, where they trained their standing army, and the High Saints steered the religion as a whole.

Will hadn’t been here since they tried to kidnap Jason a few years back.

I guess…from a certain angle, if you squint real hard, Bone Mountain looks a bit like a femur, Will thought, measuring the mountain with his thumb and wondering how much effort it would take to tear it all down.

Probably more than the Maksu fort made of sticks and piled rocks, that was for sure. The church was rich, so they could probably afford to enchant the walls against earth-based attacks.

Atop the wall was a glittering line of soldiers, mostly level 25, wearing mass-produced Blessed Steel armor and weapons. The armor they wore weren’t Relics, but they were stronger than anything a level 25 could pierce with just the strength of their arm.

Will stood outside the gate, patiently waiting.

Beside him was a palanquin with a gaggle of older women chatting with each other, playing bones and drinking tea, looking like they were having a grand old time. Their porters were currently on break, eating breakfast as they waited for their audience with the Speaker of the High Saint’s Council.

“Young man, come join us! We could use a handsome face to brighten up our day!” One of the old ladies said, motioning to Will while the others giggled.

Will glanced up at the huge gate, felt the cold morning air against his skin, then glanced at the small brazier keeping the palanquin warm.

Will shrugged and started over.

There were worse things in life than being hit on by old women.

“Ooh, he’s coming, he’s coming!” one of the old women said, hitting her friends on the shoulder.

“My eyes still work, Madeline.” The dealer, a black haired woman wearing vision enhancing Relics on her face said.

“Uh – let him through!” The grey-haired one at the center called to the porters as they made to rise to their feet at Will’s approach.

“Thanks, madams.” Will said, surprised at the temperature difference once he passed the transparent silk curtains.

“Miss, please.” The woman at the center said, offering him a hand dripping with gold and jewels. “I’m Lenore Halifae.”

Will didn’t know what to do with the hand, so he kissed it.

“Miss Halifae, lovely to meet you.” Will said, releasing her hand and taking a seat around the table.

“Such a charmer.” ‘Madeline’ said while the others cackled.

“Do you know how to play bones?” one of the women with black hair and thick Relic glasses asked. The one who said her eyes still work.

“I’ve played from time to time while Climbing.” Will said. It was a pretty simple bluffing game.

“Ooh, he’s a climber, that explains the muscles.”

“He’s got that lean look to him that I adore.”

“Just the right age, too.”

So this is what it’s like. Will thought. The experience wasn’t perfect, because he felt absolutely no threat from these old women, but it gave him a rough idea.

“The buy in is thirty gold pieces.” The woman with glasses said, giving him a look that told him she didn’t expect him to have the money.

Will opened his mouth to say he didn’t have any coins that small when Madeline placed a possessive hand on his shoulder.

“I’ll cover the young man.” Madeline said, pulling a stack of gold pieces out of a satchel designed to hold them in neat rows.

“That would be most appreciated,” Will said.

“Of course,” Madeline said, placing a stack of gold coins in front of him. “It’s worth it to see a fresh face around his stuffy keep.”

In a matter of seconds, Will was in the game.  The game was played with dice, where the dealer would roll three in the center and the others would roll their own dice, peek under their cups, and make bets about who got the best score. There were different combinations that would score more points.

For example, if you got three threes, that was known as ‘The Deceiver’ and was worth 27 points, rather than nine.

“The Deceiver again!?” Madeline gasped as Will raked the gold coins across the table.

“Young man, were you just born lucky as well as handsome?”

“Something like that,” Will said, wondering if the nearby fortress of Granesh was warping fate and making him roll so many Deceivers.

Or maybe I’m just lucky.

“Switch out his dice!”

“Those are my dice. I didn’t roll any Deceivers!” Marsha said.

“Those must be Marsha’s loaded ones, give him these!” Olanna said, giving Will another set of dice.

Will rolled the dice and peeked under his cup.

Two more threes.

The dealer rolled a one, a three and a five.

All the old ladies looked at Will.

“I can see it on his smug, handsome face!” Madeline said, pointing a finger at Will before folding.

“No, he can’t have another one!” Lenore said, calling Will’s bluff.

Will revealed his dice to groans from the entire group of women.

“What’s your Class, young man? It better not be Gambler or Playboy. I’ll be very cross with you if it is.” Glasses woman asked, narrowing her eyes at Will. The hint of a smile tugging at her lips let Will know she was faking the indignation. An excuse to harass a handsome young man.

“I wouldn’t mind Playboy.” Madeline chimed in, to much twittering from the rest of the group.

“It’s World Traveler.” Will said.

“Like a courier?” Lenore asked.

“Something like that.” Will nodded. “I’m very good at travelling.”

“I’ll bet you are with those legs,” Madline growled.

Calm down, old woman.

“You’d be surprised.” Will said with a smile.

“So what brings you to Bone Mountain. Delivering a message?” Lenore asked.

“Something like that.” Will said. “Someone sent me a message a while ago, and I’m here to give my response.”

“Is it some kind of job offer? Because I’ve got a high-level position for someone of exactly your talents. You could work your way to the top in a very short time.” Madeline said.

Calm down, old woman!

“By all the gods, Madeline!” Olanna, the woman with the glasses said, rolling her eyes as the old women around Madeline began pinching her sides and bonking her with their pipes.

“No, it’s not about a job.” Will said with a chuckle. “It was more of an attempted murder.”

“…What?” Madeline asked, her expression sobering.

A harried-looking soldier jogged up to the palanquin, garnering the attention of Will and the old women.

“Madame Halifae, we regret to inform you that your meeting with the Speaker has been delayed to this afternoon.

“What!? Who-“

The messenger paled, turning to Will and looking like he’d rather be anywhere else.

“The Speaker will see you now.” he said, trying not to look at the rich old women staring holes into the side of his face.

In the silence that followed, Will climbed to his feet, pulling out an ivory coin and dropping it on the table to cover the no-doubt expensive tea.

“Ladies, it was fun,” Will said, leaving his pile of winnings where it lay.

“Wait, what did you say your name was!?” Lenore asked.

Will glanced over his shoulder.

“You never asked.”

Their mouths silently gaped like fish on land.

Will was escorted through the looming double doors into a narrow series of hallways that ended with him face-to-face with the Speaker of the High Saint’s Council.

“Apologies. Did you wait long?” Edward Nakos said, faintly wet and smelling of soap. He’d taken a shower so quick he hadn’t had time to rinse or dry thoroughly.

“I had an amusing distraction,” Will said with a shrug.

“Good, that’s good,” the Speaker said, sitting down and drinking some tea that smelled faintly of narcotics. Probably to help him relax.

“What purpose does The Deceiver have in coming here? To kill me? Hmm?”

“Wouldn’t that make you a martyr and galvanize your entire religion?” Will asked.

“Well, you can’t blame a guy for trying.” Edward muttered, setting down his tea. “So what do you want?”

“Can you raise the dead?” Will asked.

Edward frowned.

Will released Ash Lee from his Dimensional Storage. A whole corpse pushed the bounds of what he could carry in his storage, but he managed it.

The corpse slumped to the ground.

“This man’s name is Ash Lee. Do you know him?”

The Speaker shook his head.

“He, or someone like him, led a group of Maksu to an ancient graveyard on the 1st Floor. This ancient graveyard had hundreds of powerful Relics, previously owned by saints of the Graneshian faith.”

“Huh.” Edward grunted, eyebrows raising.

“It just so happened that the Establishing Quest, which was to exterminate these unusually well-armed maksu included a large amount of young priestesses of Holdna.”

“So what you’re saying is it looks like the Church of Granesh sabotaged the Establishing Quest in order to weaken our rivals.”

“That’s what it looks like.” Will said. “I wanted to get some answers out of our friend here, but I couldn’t risk leaving him alive around a bunch of rookies.”

“What’s your plan?” The Speaker asked.

Will pulled out the most recent iteration of Laurence’s automatic crossbow, small enough to fit on his belt, and placed it in the center of the table.

“I’m confident the church has some way of telling truth from lies. Bring him back to life, then you and I alone interrogate him. Prove your innocence to my satisfaction: I will not commit any violence today, and I will not blacklist the church of Granesh.”

“What is this?” Edward asked, looking down at the flash glass and anchorite weapon with the revolving cylinder at its center.

“It is a weapon so cheap, powerful and easy to use, that it could allow the citizens of the Ring to fight against the tide of monsters at the end of the Coil. I could supply millions of them to the Ring in a matter of months.”

“Why would you want that? You’re the literal avatar of Chaos.”

“Short answer? Money.” Will said. “I don’t care whether or not the people outside The Tower survive the end of the Coil. Carrie Envar is trying to monopolize transport through The Tower and she has taken steps to choke off the supply of raw goods that my Stronghold needs.”

Take the opportunity to plant the idea that Carrie is my enemy in his head. When he tries to go behind my back and make plans with her to betray me…

“Naturally I’m not going to give you an exclusive contract. Civilians and other churches will get these as well. But at least you won’t be left helpless when the Coil ends.”

Edward gave Will a long, pensive look before setting down the narcotic-laced tea and taking a deep breath, rising to his feet.

“Bring the corpse with you. We’re going to the Confession Room.”