Monster Hoetel and their Care (Patreon)

content: gender neutral reader, reader with autism and/or ADHD

Centaur Manager is maybe your best choice if you struggle with ADHD. He is exceptionally organized and loves to insert his knowledgeable hand into any matter. Hearing about your struggles has prompted him to do some thorough research, and now he finds a lot of joy in being your ‘assistant’. He’ll provide you with charts, send you reminders, keep you occupied and entertained, and – most importantly – he will always be patient with you. Just…don’t question his methods. You once made the big mistake of offering to join him in the office: there were tens of tall stacks of paper scattered all over the floor, booklets sprawled across the desk, telephones ringing every couple of minutes. You gawked in terror as he answered a call, comforting an irate guest, while writing an email to some of the staff and signing lists for upcoming events, all without a shred of doubt or hesitation. “This isn’t the life for me,” you sighed afterwards, curled on his back and waiting to be tucked in for the day.

Minotaur Maid is similarly organized and a perfect fit if you’re looking for a little discipline. He will make sure you do whatever you’re supposed to do, even if he has to hound you relentlessly for it. He’ll oversee your efforts with crossed arms and a somber frown, but deep inside he’s proud of your achievements. Additionally, his labyrinthine lair is a great shelter for the times you’re feeling overwhelmed or overstimulated. If you need some peace and quiet, just scurry over. He won’t question it. The only downside is that he can’t seem to apply the same neutrality when cleaning is involved. “You’re…doing an amazing job,” he grunts, visibly uncomfortable. You’re not using enough pressure. The scrubbing should be in circular motions. “Here, I’ll show you how to improve,” he suggests, taking over and essentially doing the task instead of you at great speed. Well, less work for you.

The Warden just gets you. Whatever rituals or requirements you may have, he will not only support them but also join in! If you find yourself stimming or in need of a distraction, he will begin a comical dance of pulling out sensory toys and objects that may satisfy your cravings. “Give it a squeeze,” he’ll encourage, rattling his sleeves for more items. He will also copy whatever you’re doing and call it a bonding experience. You’re beginning to suspect he’s not too different from yourself as you watch him flapping his hands in excitement once everything is said and done. The Warden is the monster to see if you need a little entertainment. Just don’t count on him for anything responsible. “That was a lot of fun,” he’ll say, wiping away imaginary tears. “What were here for again?” You stare in horror as realization hits you. “We were supposed to finish a job hours ago!”

Orc Chef makes the best comfort food. It doesn’t matter how picky or particular you are about your dishes; he will always get it right. It’s his way of showing support. At the end of a difficult day, he will sit you down, offer you your favorite meals, and listen to whatever it is that weighs on your heart. Oh, he’s a fantastic listener, but also very resourceful. He has a soft, calming voice that manages to soothe your worries with words of wisdom. Another thing he loves doing is picking out a book and reading it out for you. Don’t worry, he knows what you like: he’s rather certain you’ll agree with his choice of lecture. He’ll narrate the paragraphs as he strokes your hair, occasionally giving you a reassuring squeeze.

Alien Priest loves hearing about your latest hyperfixation. He is, after all, a monster of knowledge, and any kind of new information is a welcome addition. Besides, he enjoys watching your vigorous gestures and animated face as you ramble about whatever’s gained your curiosity. He will often do more research on his own and surprise you with books and scrolls on the subject. “Where did you get this,” you inquire, holding the thick, dusty document in your hands. “I couldn’t find anything written about it!” He waves his hand dismissively. “Oh, it was nothing. I have a friend two galaxies over, though upon my arrival I discovered he’d been dead for centuries! Thankfully his library was still intact, so I took the liberty to collect what was of interest”. He may not be the most affectionate creature, but you can count on him to fuel your inquisitiveness even further.

Plant Daddy is a man of words. He spends all his time talking to people, buttering them up or ordering them around, so he absolutely knows how to approach you. He’s got you figured out in moments and always seems to say just the thing to motivate you or calm you down. If you struggle with social cues or have trouble understanding situations, he’ll be your walking dictionary. The only exception is when he senses the other party has been disrespectful towards you. “Do you think they were sarcastic,” you wondered once as you recalled a small argument with a guest. “Give me their room number, (Y/N), and I shall clarify it for you,” he pleaded with a cheerful smile. You’ve no idea what he did, but the monstrous offender left his premises and never returned. His methods remain a mystery.