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anxiety before the party (Patreon)

Published:
2025-08-29 20:47:29
Imported:
2026-10

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Content

you really don't want to go and meet these people. i'd much rather stay home, too. but you know... doing it together actually sounds kind of nice... once we're there i'm not going to leave your side for a second. when we need to we'll just go out and breathe for a while. it's going to be okay. even fun. because we're doing it together.

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Comments

Smellwell

Anya. Gentlemen. I did it! Your boy Josh did it. I had my first date, kiss and "intimate encounter." I don't say that to do some weird, cringe brag. I just want Anya to be proud, idk why tf I need a random woman on the internet named Anya to be proud. But I do, lmao 😆. Gentlemen, if you keep trying, keep moving, get past the trial and error, you can do it. I literally thought I was unlovable for so long. She's an angel too. She's sweet like this and pumps me up, gives me strength. Here's to Chey 🍻🥰😍

Hiba 🌙

Here’s to your first kiss, your first intimate spark, and the courage it took to embrace the moment .cheers, Josh! 🍾✌️🥂🍻😃

Smellwell

Thank you 😁 Appreciate ya. Not only is it a massive weight off of my shoulders to have passed that cultural and societal milestone but also, and I'm mostly saying this because I think it's important for guys who think they're unlovable to read this, but the pat on the back actually does feel nice. Idk. It's just like...years of mental anguish and self destruction paying off all in one night. Like I had to go through a whole Rollercoaster to get there, might as well celebrate getting off that Rollercoaster. That metaphor goes hard af too. 😎 Love y'all

anya's audio

heeeheeeyy, josh! you deserve every second of that happiness! congratulations 🥹✨🥳

anya's audio

doing happy dances for you over here now 🕺🕺✨😍

Smellwell

I was doing happy dances in my head the whole time. Had to contain myself and be cool. Part of me feels guilty though. There are a lot of guys just like me who've been alone for even longer and feel even more hopeless. I feel like a rich person among poor people. I feel like I'm Bruce Wayne and I have to become Batman to deal with my guilt of being rich. Rich in happiness. Lmaooo 😭

anya's audio

yeah, like it doesn’t feel deserved? you know, all those lonely people, they should cheer SO MUCH for you. because you would, right? if it was someone else who was like ”hey guys, your dude right here just made it out from years of loneliness and isolation🥹🥹🥹 i can’t believe it!” you would be happy for him, right? maybe a bit jealous, but still happy! maybe you should be happy for josh, too...? he deserves to feel that happiness to its fullest🥹✨✨✨✨ this world gets only better with some more happiness in it. just fucking goooo with it🤩🤩🤩

Smellwell

Aww, Anya you're an angel. I read all your comments in your voice and it's amazing. You'd be a really good friend. I hope you have a really lucky guy in your life. Or girl, that would be a wild twist lmao. And yes, absolutely I'm happy whenever I read comments about lonely people finding a partner. At first...it was a little hard. I had some jealousy and anger in me. But I knew it was wrong and weak to feel that way, so I'd always respond positively. Even when the comments were sad, involving heartbreak. I remember reading this 16yo kid, talking about getting his first heartbreak and contemplating suicide. I told him, "Good work lil homie. Better to get your first heartbreak early. I'm approaching my mid-20s and still waiting for my first heartbreak. Scared to death about how it'll feel. This'll strengthen you." Might sound slightly insensitive, given his contemplation of suicide. But I certainly understand. I had thoughts at his age too. Part of me was totally jealous and thinking, "Bro, at least you had some heartbreak. At least you had someone to lose. I never even had the opportunity for heartbreak." But that isn't the way to go. No one needs to hear that bitter attitude. And that kind of jealousy is self-destructive. Look at incel culture, those people are dangerous.