"Where The Light Still Shines" - Adam's "Hallmark" AU Christmas Scenario Special (Patreon)

Chapter One

I forgot how quiet a place can be. The Big City is constant noise—night and day—and I didn’t realise how used to the din of it I had become.

But stepping out of my car into Wayhaven, a blanket of snowy silence greets me.

It helps that it’s late evening, the sun having blinked out over the horizon and leaving the sky a palette of watercolour blues and pinks. Drifts of sparkling snow coat the buildings in blankets of icy cold, but the insides look warm as they glimmer with Christmas lights.

Shutting the car of my door, I take a breath of the chill air and let the freshness of it fill my clogged lungs. Then I head down the street, making my way to my old apartment block, letting my feet fall into the muscle-memory I used to have when I lived here so long ago.

--

--

Chapter Two

“I don’t care that you just got back,” Tina moans, flopping into the chair. “You can’t miss out on the Christmas festivities!”

I spread my hands towards the suitcase spread on my bed. “I’m not even unpacked. What would I wear?” I reply. “Plus, I have to put things back in order after my tenants redecoration.” The people I’d rented my apartment to had been very considerate, but the furniture is all out of place to how I used to have it.

Tina blows out a breath. “You can wear what you’re wearing now. Everyone is going to be looking at the tree and the sparkly stuff, not your scrubby jumper and jeans.”

I glance down at myself with a wince. It was the warmest thing I owned. Winter doesn’t really hit the Big City in a major way with all the buildings and cars pumping out constant heat.

Tina curls her arm around mine, snatching the shirt I was about to unfold and throwing it back down onto my open suitcase. “Come on. We’re getting you in the festive mood starting now!”

A groan escapes me, and I just have time to scrabble and grab my jacket before she yanks me out of my apartment.

-

I wouldn’t admit it out loud, but Tina was right. This is just what I need.

After suffering the defeat of not getting the promotion I’d worked so hard for, a break was most definitely necessary.

Waiting for her to return with some mulled wine, I glance up at the towering Christmas tree dripping with ribbon-tied labels. On each one is written someone’s festive wish. I smile, glancing over them, gradually circling the tree to take them all in.

As I move, my focus shifts for a second to movement on the other side as someone else walks around before I shift my focus back to the tags.

Then I double-take as the figure on the other side becomes heart-stoppingly obvious.

“Oh crap,” I mutter, tugging up the hood of my coat. I grimace as I glance down at my jumper mottled with frayed holes, and my jeans splattered with ink from the pen that’d broke earlier.

Right now is not the time I want to be seeing the guy I had a nearly major thing with years ago.

“[Name]?” His voice drifts over to me before I can even manage a sprinted step away in retreat.

I roll my eyes, beg for the ground to swallow me whole and when it doesn’t, I slowly turn, dropping my hood, and force a smile onto my face.

I bite back a snort. Of course he looks perfect with his glimmering green eyes, immaculate wintery outfit, and the snow kissing his long lashes.

“Hey, Adam,” I squeak out before clearing my throat and getting my voice back under control. “I didn’t expect to see you here.”

His brow lifts as he draws to a slow stop in front of me. “I live here.”

“Yes.” I snort-chuckle and really beg the ground to swallow me up this time. “Yes. Of course you do.”

A horribly thick silence descends over us.

Thankfully, it doesn’t last long, as Tina veers through the crowds and makes it back to my side, shoving a warm glass into my hands.

“Here you go,” she states, then glances up to where my gaze is locked. “Oh, didn’t I tell you Adam was going to be here?” She smiles behind her glass as she sips at her wine.

 “No. You didn’t,” I hiss out through gritted teeth.

“It is good to see you again, [Name],” Adam says before turning and walking away.

Against my better judgement, my mind whirls trying to find any subtext or subtle hint of emotion beneath the way he said that.

Unfortunately, I can’t pick out anything.

--

--

Chapter Five

“This isn’t exactly what I had planned when I signed up to help with the festivities,” I huff out as I haul an oversized wire reindeer covered in sparkling lights up a flight of stairs to the shop above.

I’m sure I see a smirk on Adam’s lips, but it’s too fast to know if it was truly there or not.

“You signed up?” he asks, staring down at me from the top of the stairs as he tugs on the ropes around the reindeer’s legs to help. “I thought Tina was the instigator of your involvement here?”

“…I would have signed up eventually,” I grumble.

“You will have to push it harder,” he says, bracing himself against the top step. “Its back feet are stuck on the stairs.”

I nod, crouch down and shove my shoulder against the ridiculous ornament.

It doesn’t budge.

“Are you pushing?” he demands.

“Yes!” I yell in reply.

“Try it again,” he orders.

I thin my lips with a frown before sighing and shoving.

It still doesn’t move.

“Again,” he commands.

I do, and it still doesn’t move.

We repeat this five times until Adam’s barked order of ‘Again’ has me springing up and jabbing my finger in the air towards him.

“How about you try it again, hm?” I retort.

He arches a brow. “Your city job has made you soft, it seems.”

“What?” I take my hands from the decoration to fling them up in frustration. “Soft? I’ll have you know—”

“No!” Adam shouts, scrabbling as the ropes begin slipping from his grasp. “Don’t let go!”

My eyes snap wide as the sparkling butt of the massive reindeer comes bumping down the stairs.

“Oof!” It smashes right into me, sending me reeling backwards and tumbling against the wall.

My eyes flash with stars for a moment as footsteps rush down the stairs.

“[Name]!” Adam shoves the ornament aside with a hefty shove to reveal me in a crumple in the corner. Panic seizes every feature as he grabs my shoulders and crouches down to my level. “Are you okay?”

Thankfully, my ego is more bruised than my body. “I’m fine. Though I think I’ll be forever haunted by reindeers now.”

Adam laughs. The sound of it seems to radiate along the whole hallway—brighter and more cheerful than any Christmas lights could ever manage.

I’m left speechless for a moment as I watch the rare happiness that overcomes him.

“Here,” he says, the smile remaining on his lips as he stands and offers me a hand.

I take it, drawing in a breath at the way the simple touch sends a flurry of warm happiness chasing through me.

He helps me back onto my feet…and doesn’t let go of my hand.

--

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Chapter Eight

The chill of the stone wall seeps through my trousers, but Adam sitting right up against my side keeps the cold at bay.

As we stare out across the frost-kissed concrete of the library’s carpark, still waiting for the delivery van to arrive, quiet falls over us. But it’s not uncomfortable or tense. It’s very much like the silence we used to share, years ago, when things between us were so simple and yet so complicated.

I glance to Adam. “Why did you stay?”

He flicks his gaze to me with a slight frown. “Pardon?”

“Why did you stay? In Wayhaven, I mean,” I explain. “You weren’t born here. And after your contract was over, you said you were going to leave.”

His whole body stiffens as he crosses his arms. “Does it matter?”

“I was just…curious, I suppose,” I mumble.

A foggy breath leaves his lips as he glares out ahead of us. “Why didn’t you return?”

I blink a few times. “What?”

His teeth grit for a moment, his fingers grasping his biceps tighter. “You said your job would keep you away for a year only.” He looks at me now, a chilled coldness icing across the green of his eyes. “It has been much longer than that.”

My heart crushes in my chest. “…Is that why you stayed?”

He pushes up from the wall as a van begins to turn into the car park. “Does it matter?” he repeats in a muttered whisper.

I stand up and grab his arm to turn him to face me. “Yes. Because the reason I stayed at the job was because I thought…” I didn’t think Adam would still be here when I got back. And I knew the town would feel empty, I would feel empty, without him.

He gazes at me, the harshness in his eyes softening as he waits for me to finish.

Say it. My whole body begs at me to confess the words that stay trapped on my tongue. Tell him.

“Sorry I’m late,” the delivery woman announces, pulling a clipboard from the passenger seat as she exits the van. She flicks her attention between us. “Am I…interrupting something?”

I release a breath and turn to her with a wobbly smile. “No. Nothing at all.”

--

--

Chapter Eleven

I’m not sure why I left work for a break but managed to be wrangled into doing work on that break.

I blow out a sigh as I rest an elbow on the counter of the wooden stall and rest my chin in my palm.

People are skating on the ice rink nearby, and I watch the happiness light their faces as they make incredible Christmas memories together. The last time I ice-skated was years ago…with Adam.

A lump forms in my throat.

Of course, I’ve thought of Adam over the years since I left. It’s impossible not to—I’m thinking about him now when I only saw him this morning!

I just…struggle to know if he’s thought about me.

A frown knots my brow as I shake my head. Why does it matter? I’m heading back to the city when this is all over, and Adam…will do whatever Adam wants to do.

Separate from me.

My chest pinches at the thought, and I can’t help but wince.

“Thinking of when we last took to the ice?”

I whip around at the sound of Adam’s voice behind me.

After taking a couple of seconds to make sure he’s really there and not a hopeful figure of my imagination, I manage a smile. “What do you mean?”

He nods at the rink. “If I remember rightly, you took quite the tumble.”

I cock my head at him. “And you came tumbling right after me.”

A smile pulls at his lips. “How could I not? Falling for you seems a certainty whether on the ice or not.”

The blood rushes through my ears so loud I’m not sure if I heard him right. “You…what?”

“Looks like things are going well here,” Verda says as he makes his way over, a scarf wrapped halfway around his face, the rest of him bundled in what looks like three coats. “The money from the ice rink donations…”

I don’t hear the rest of what he says. I whip my head back around to Adam…only to find him heading away through the forested path away from Hollow’s Peak.

--

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Chapter Fifteen

I clasp the clipboard to my chest as I stare hungrily over the selection of cakes and puddings arranged on the trestle table that’s covered in a paper tablecloth.

“If you drool on them before the judging, I can’t imagine you will be very popular with the entrants,” Adam states.

I roll my eyes and look to him. “I wasn’t drooling. I was merely admiring.”

He lifts a brow.

I hold up my hand and pinch my fingers nearly together. “Ok, I may have been drooling a teensy bit.” I then spread my hand towards the table. “But I haven’t seen homecooked goods like this since, well, since I was here last.”

His shoulders tighten a little. “You have missed out on many experiences for not being here.”

My hand drops back to my side. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Exactly what I said,” he replies simply before moving on to examine the next table.

After a quick frown, I trail after him. “I didn’t want to leave, you know.”

He pauses for a moment before turning to face me, almost in challenge. “Then why did you go? When there was something between—” He stumbles over his words and doesn’t finish the sentence.

I try not to let what he might have admitted then throw me off kilter. “Why didn’t you ask me to stay?”

His mouth opens but no reply comes, so he snaps it shut.

We inspect the next couple of tables for the Christmas fair in silence before we stop together at the last one.

Adam reaches out, adjusting a label next to a display of handmade toys.

A breath eases out of him. “It would have been selfish of me to ask you to stay.”

I swallow through the emotion swirling inside of me. “Then I guess it was selfish of me that I wished you had.”

There’s a thick beat of silence.

Adam breaks it, spreading his fingers on the table as through to steady himself. “Would I have been enough of a reason for you to stay?”

Slowly, I reach out and slide my fingers over his. “Yes. You’re the only reason I needed.”

We turn to face each other. The glimmering lights of the Christmas tree cast a warm glow across him as he gazes intently at me.

“And I suppose it would be selfish of me to ask you to stay now?” he murmurs.

I slip my fingers between his and step closer. “You won’t know the answer until you ask.” It’s difficult to force the words out as my heart thrums hard enough to stifle my lungs.

Anticipation swirls like a snowstorm around us.

It’s only broken when Adam steps back with a shake of his head. “I should let Dr. Verda know that everything is set for the fair.”

As he hurries out of the hall, I snort a breath.

What was I really expecting?

I don’t let myself answer that question. It hurts enough already.

--

--

Chapter Eighteen

I click the ‘end call’ button on my phone and stare down at it unblinking.

“Is everything alright, [Name]?” Adam asks after a moment of my continued stunned silence.

I turn to look at where he’s nearly at the top of a ladder, hanging a sweeping garland of red velvet ribbon to the beam above the door of my kitchen.

“I…I got it.” The words mutter out of me before I shake my head announce louder, “I got the promotion.”

A flash of panic overtakes his face for the briefest of seconds before he breaks into a smile. “That is incredible!” He drops down the ladder and rushes over to me.

“Yeah. It is.” Disbelief still makes my words short.

Adam grasps my shoulders to break me out of my shocked state, his smile still in place. “And most deserved.” A slight furrow appears in his brow. “But I thought you did not receive the promotion? Which is why you returned?”

“That’s what I thought,” I reply. “But I left before the announcement. I was so sure they were going to give it to someone else.”

“You must be thrilled,” Adam says, though there’s a slight tension to his words that almost begs me to say I’m not.

I press a smile onto my lips. “Of course, I am.” The matching tightness of my words admits that I’m not.

“When do you have to leave?” he asks.

I press my lips together before admitting, “Tomorrow.”

“But that is Christmas Eve,” he responds, his frown tightening.

I nod. “I know.”

We stand together for a long while until his hands trail down my shoulders, my arms, his fingertips finally tracing across my hands before letting go. I don’t know what to say. I know what I want to say, but I also know I shouldn’t say it.

I worked so hard for this promotion.

And now I realise…I never even wanted it.

Coming back to Wayhaven has reminded me of the life I was supposed to have—the one I really wanted.

And finding Adam again has made me realise what truly matters.

But am I really ready to risk the steadiness of this career on the hope that Adam might feel the same way I do?

I step back, my smile shaky as I clear my throat. “I should let Tina and the others know.”

He nods. “Of course.”

--

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Chapter Twenty

I’d gotten used to the fluffy white snow in Wayhaven that I almost half-expected to find the same in the Big City. Instead, slushy grey mounds of half-melted snow lines the path towards the skyscraper where my old life awaits me.

I come to stand outside of the glass tower and stare upwards.

It’s as though my feet refuse to move. Once I step through those doors, the dream I’d been living for the past couple of weeks bursts and reality returns.

I tighten my fingers into fists to ready myself and take one step before a hand reaches out to stop me.

I swing around on the spot and stutter a breath as Adam gazes at me.

“Adam?” I expel, my eyes widening. “What are you doing here?”

“I am not too late, am I?” he asks, a flush of pink blooming across his pale cream cheeks.

I frown. “Too late for what?”

A soft smile catches him. “To be selfish.”

My pulse races, strangling my voice for a moment. “What?”

“Do not walk into that building, [Name],” he pleads. “Come back to Wayhaven.” He steps in close enough that I can feel the heat of him. “With me.”

“This…this can’t be real,” I murmur, glancing away as though it will be enough to break this obvious hallucination.

But it’s proven to be very real as he cups my cheek to draw my attention back to him.

“If you do not want to return to Wayhaven, that is fine. We can stay here.” His hand falls from my cheek to take my hand and grasp it between us. “But allow me to stay. Please. The thought of losing you for a second time in my life is too much to bear.”

Once I can make my body work again, I smile and reach up to brush my fingers along his jaw. “Let’s go home, Adam.”

He smiles in return, but the expression is lost as I drag him in closer for the kiss that’s been building for years between us.

And it was so worth the wait.