Chapter Six - WWMD

Returning to the inn, she spoke with Emma for a moment and made a quick trade. She’d warm up some water, do the dishes, and basically take care of some scullery work in exchange for a warm meal, some leftovers for the road, and two warm baths.

Emma was happy enough with her that the deal was struck with a handshake, and then Rorasio got to work, first drawing the water and then warming it up with a quick spell. [Boil Blood] was the closest thing she had to a spell with ‘boil’ in its name, and a bit of instinctual tweaking had it working to boil water just fine.

Then she ushered Cricket into the bathroom and basically tossed the woman in. 

Cricket, unfortunately, had no shame, and undressed right in front of Rosario, which really tested her maidly demeanor. “Think you can clean these?” Cricket asked as she held up her corset.

“I’ll... see what I can do,” Rosario agreed. 

As it turned out, there was a small wash station at the back of the inn, one that ran close to the river and which had rather dated washboards and some soap that smelled of lye.

She was happy that she had such good stats because hand-washing was a pain in the rear. She did take a moment to change out of her first maid dress and into a second one, with a quick dip in the river (there was a small, walled off section for the purpose, as a sort of public spot to wash off quickly). Rosario dried herself and the clothes off with a small [Conjure Flame] which produced a nice warm heat.

She folded up the [Jester]’s clothes nice and neatly, for the extra experience, and then returned them all to the steam-filled bathroom.

Then she did as her deal with Emma called for and washed up. 

She was quite pleased to be rewarded for her efforts.

[Scullery Maid] has leveled up!

[Scullery Maid] level 2

Charisma +1

Cricket took her sweet time in that bathroom, but when she left her skin was notably cleaner and she smelled faintly of perfume rather than strongly of rotting vegetables and horse shit. It was a marked improvement.

“Wha! Thou are a miraclemaker, dearest [Maid]! My clothes have never felt so fresh or smelled so little of sweat.”

“Have you considered cleaning them more often?” Rosario asked. “Or carrying a change of clothes in your Inventory?”

Cricket’s eyebrows and antennae both rose. “Doth I seem like a noble lady, who would have more than one set of attire? Besides, my Strength is hardly so grand!”

Ah, right. There was an in-game mechanic that was similar. Players had inventory limits based on their stats. Strength was the big one, but Dexterity played a role as well. There were also a multitude of low-levelled utility spells and items that could help with that. Bags of Holding and the like. 

She had made a fair bit of coin while leveling her Apprentice Enchanter Job making the most basic versions of those. 

“Well then, shall we go?” she asked.

“Already?” Cricket asked. “The day grows long, doth it not?”

“It’s barely past noon,” she replied.”

“Yes, true, but thou struck me as someone unable to afford the convenience of a land strider. If we walk now, we will be setting camp within only a few hours.”

She shrugged. “So? We’ll be that much closer to Alpta tomorrow.”

Cricket hesitated, then grinned. “So be it! Let no one say that fair Cricket refuses an extra night in the tender embrace of a fair Maidly maiden!”

Rosario almost rolled her eyes, but that would have been unmaidly behaviour. Instead, she opened the door for Cricket and ushered her out.

The [Jester] walked... no, she didn’t walk, she strutted out. She moved her shoulders almost as much as her hips. Rosario, meanwhile, walked with demure little steps... which ended up being more than enough to keep up, seeing as how she had a lot more leg to work with.

Really, at some point, playing the role of a maid might become dull, but she wasn’t sure if that point would be anytime soon. This was fun. And... in a way, it was helping her a lot. She wasn’t stuck in a weird headspace where she was going to panic about being here for real. Instead, she just had to ask herself a simple question: What Would a Maid Do?

“Wwmd?” she muttered.

Cricket half-turned to look at her. “Huh?”

“Nothing,” she replied. “Merely clearing my throat. I take it we’re heading in the right direction?”

The smaller woman nodded, which set her bells to jingling. “Yup! We most certainly are or my name is not Cricket the Almighty!”

“You name is not,” Rosario replied.

“Regardless, as you can see, we’re nearly out of this small backwater already.” Cricket gestured ahead. There was, perhaps surprisingly, a wall around the edge of Riverbend. 

The wall was more of a fence with a ditch running along the outside, really. A palisade, perhaps? But it did serve as a good demarcation for where the city ended and the world beyond began.

Next to the exit, which featured a stone arch bridging over the ditch, was a small pasture just inside the walls. Currently it was divided in half. On the one side were some horses and donkeys, grazing on a few tufts of grass and milling about, and on the other were long striders.

In the game, they had been one of the faster methods of getting around. A player could rent one, or use a long strider station to essentially teleport long distances from one set location to another. 

The game actually made longer-distance travel a little difficult, which was actually rather nice. It made the world feel more lived-in when a player had to know the seven methods of transportation to get from A to B.

Long striders were katydid. The same family as grasshoppers. They were taller in their adult form than Rosario was, and about four times as long as they were tall, not including their antennae. These, in particular, had a yellow-green colouration that matched the local trees and grass, and when they laid down, they could be mistaken for a small berm or hill.

“Oh, there’s my uncle!” Cricket said. She gave a wave, and strangely enough, one of the katydid waved an antennae back. 

That... had to be a coincidence. 

There were plenty of playable races, and bug-people were one of them, but the game had never gone into any great details about their reproductive abilities, or for that matter how. They were just one of those races that started around the region of Lithos and which were probably not even in the top ten for popularity. 

They continued on past the entranceway and immediately started on a gravel road guarded by a lone [Guard] stationed in a wooden tower. 

Cricket waved to the man, even doffing her jangly jester’s cap before strutting onwards.

“Are you certain you know the route?” Rosario asked.

“I know it indeed!” Cricket said. “What I don’t know, or rather whom, is you! Tell me, if you wouldn’t mind. What’s a fair elven lady doing in these parts. Lithos is the forsaken land of the demons, you know. Well, less so now.”

“Less so now?” Rosario asked. “Do you mean all of the humans in town?”

Cricket grinned. “Noticed that, did ya? I mean, I think they were always around, but after the Demon Lord got himself nice and captured and the nation fell apart... well, things changed. Not all for the worst, mind, but there were problems. You haven’t been in Lithos long?”

“Just a few days.”

“Hmm, a few days is more than what it takes to get this far into Lithos,” Cricket said. “I think that thou are suspiciously suspicious, miss level two [Scullery Maid]. Congrats on the level up, by the way! Did you know, it’s tradition in Lithos to give your nearest and dearest friend a gift when you level up?” She grinned, and Rosario could feel the smugness wafting off of her.

“I doth think that’s a lie,” Rosario said. “As for how I came here, I used my Maidly skills.”

Cricket snorted. “Fair enough!” She crossed her arms over her head and continued along. “Let me know if your feet start to hurt! We have a long ways to go.”

“I’ll be certain to inform you,” Rosario replied. “By the way, is this route dangerous?”

“This one? Nah! At most, you can expect to encounter a few mantids, but they don’t roam this far south. Bandits... We won’t worry about those.”

“I see. Do you mind if I ask you some questions?” 

“That’s one!” Cricket said.

Rosario hummed. “I suppose it is, at that.”

Maybe she could wait until later before grilling the bug girl.

***