Pisces New Moon - are you crying yet? (Patreon)

I just got off the phone with my best friend Joie. We call it a “hanging from the cupboard door” moment. When you’re overcome with emotion and need someone to hold onto. “Fucking mercury retrograde Pisces new moon bullshit”, she said. Her boyfriend is going back to his wife. It hurts. She knew yesterday was also my anniversary with my ex. The anniversary of the best kiss I’ve ever had, so many years ago. Naturally it fell on such an astrologically intense day. We screamed into the void together.

March is always a tough time for me. Historically speaking. I struggle the most with seasonal affective disorder in March. That depression sinks in so deep. Last year there was so much intensity, finding out I was sick, finding out my ex had cheated on me and lied, falling in love with Elly, a work schedule that didn’t give me time to breathe, throwing a slumber party, throwing away a 7 year relationship. Just so much emotion. The month went by in a blur of tears and sleepless nights.

I’m proud to say that this year I’m doing better. I’ve set better boundaries with my work contracts. I scheduled the slumber party for April. I’ve set some personal goals for processing break up stuff and working hard on moving on. I’ve planned lots of low-stress, small moments of peacefulness. I’m really trying.

Before this winter started I had a friend tattoo apple blossoms onto my wrist. There’s a lot of personal and family symbolism in my choice, but mostly I wanted a reminder that winter never lasts forever, and spring always does it’s thing eventually.

Nothing blooms all year. 🌸