Chapter 307: The Two of Them in the Wife-Chasing Crematorium and the Husband-Chasing Crematorium (Patreon)

By late September, Tokyo's summer heat had finally burned itself out completely.

The leaves lining the ginkgo path had begun turning gold, and the air carried that crisp, distinct scent of autumn.

Tsushima Kagami walked out of the Graduate School of Humanities and Sociology building, a manila envelope in hand.

Inside were the last of his documents for the exchange program in America.

A photocopy of his visa, his itinerary confirmation, proof of insurance, and a letter of recommendation Professor Kosaka had written for him personally.

"Once you get to Yale, you should go visit an old friend of mine over there," Professor Kosaka had said as she handed him the envelope, her tone carrying the particular warmth of an elder.

"He works in comparative literature. The two of you should get along."

Kagami had nodded, tucked the envelope away, thanked her, and left the office.

Now he stood on the slope carpeted with fallen ginkgo leaves, the early-autumn breeze rolling down from the top of the hill and tugging at the hem of his shirt.

Three days left.

In three days he'd be leaving from Narita, transferring through Chicago, and flying on to New Haven.

Three weeks of academic exchange — not particularly long, but not short either.

But right now, what occupied his mind wasn't Yale, and it wasn't Professor Kosaka's old friend in comparative literature.

It was something else entirely.

Something that had been eating at him for nearly two months now.

Kagami tucked the envelope under his arm, pulled out his phone, and scrolled to a name in his contacts.

Kosaka Akane.

He stared at the name for a few seconds, his thumb hovering over the screen, before finally pulling it back without pressing call.

Asking would be pointless.

Ever since that day over summer break, he'd already asked Kosaka Akane and Machida Sonoko five or six times.

Every time, the answer was the same.

"We don't really know either," "You know how Sayuri is, sometimes she just gets stuck on something," "Just give it a bit more time."

He'd already been waiting nearly two months.

Ever since that stifling afternoon in mid-July, when Sayuri had stood at his gate wearing a mask, shoved a stack of drafts into his hands, and rushed off without a word.

All the way up to now, with September almost over.

Over these two months, the change in how Sayuri treated him had unfolded like an oil painting slowly shifting from warm tones to cold ones.

At first it was just slower replies.

She used to answer almost instantly. Now it often took hours, sometimes even until the next day.

He'd ask what was wrong.

She'd always say either "nothing's wrong" or "forgot to reply, I was working on the picture book."

Then came the distance whenever they met in person.

The old Sayuri used to lean in close, chattering away nonstop.

Sometimes she'd link arms with him, or sneak up from behind and slap his shoulder.

And now?

When they ran into each other on campus, she still smiled and said hello.

But the smile was polite in a way you'd give a senior you barely knew.

Then she'd find some excuse to leave.

"Oh, I'm meeting classmates to discuss a project," or "Sorry, I need to go return some books at the library."

Even an invitation as simple as lunch together got turned down, every time, with some excuse or another.

At first, Kagami figured she was just genuinely busy.

After all, on top of her coursework, Sayuri had just signed a contract with Kodansha to publish The Little Prince as a picture book.

Being swamped made sense.

But then he noticed something off.

Because Sayuri's attitude toward everyone else hadn't changed at all.

She still laughed and joked around with Nayotake the same as ever.

She still acted spoiled and clingy around Yukinoshita Shizuku.

She'd even run over and slap Hiratsuka Shizuka on the shoulder when she saw her.

It was only with him.

Polite. Distant. Neither close nor entirely gone.

Like a mirror with a crack running through the middle — it could still reflect a face, but it wasn't the same whole image anymore.

Something was wrong, deeply wrong.

If she acted normally with everyone else, but only kept this kind of distance from him specifically, then maybe Kosaka Akane and Machida Sonoko were right — maybe he'd done something to upset Sayuri without realizing it.

Kagami had racked his brain and still couldn't come up with a single thing he'd done wrong.

But knowing Sayuri's personality, could she really keep this up for this long over nothing?

This was practically emotional stonewalling at this point — bullying, even!

Kagami had a vague suspicion that Kosaka Akane and Machida Sonoko were hiding something too.

But there was no way to get answers out of them.

So he'd turned to his household's trusted confidante — Yukinoshita Shizuku!

But every time, she'd shot him down with the same line: "We agreed from the start that I wouldn't get involved in matters between you two."

Left with no other options, Kagami had gone to Nayotake for advice.

Nayotake's answer had been, "Maybe her hormones are just out of balance lately?"

Which clearly meant Nayotake was hiding something too and just didn't want to tell him.

So then he'd gone to Hiratsuka Shizuka.

Except Hiratsuka Shizuka was an airhead — she seemed even more baffled than he was about why Sayuri wouldn't talk to him.

He had a nagging feeling that all the women around him had gotten sneakier lately. Like everyone knew something but was refusing to tell him, just standing off to the side enjoying the show.

He replayed every meeting, every conversation before mid-July over and over, trying to dig up some kind of "evidence" against himself.

But he found nothing.

The last normal exchange they'd had was a phone call from Sayuri saying she was pulling an all-nighter working on illustrations.

He'd replied, "Take care of yourself."

And that had been the last of it.

Kagami slid his phone back into his pocket and sighed.

He walked down the slope, the fallen leaves crunching softly under his shoes.

The midday sun filtered through the ginkgo leaves, turning gentle and soft.

He passed the Faculty of Letters building, turned a corner, and headed toward the cafeteria.

Then he stopped.

A dozen or so steps ahead, a familiar figure stood in front of a vending machine.

Sayuri.

She was wearing a cream-colored knit cardigan today, with a light pink crewneck T-shirt underneath, and a dark navy pleated skirt.

Her long hair wasn't tied into its usual twin tails — it hung loose over her shoulders.

It caught the soft glow of the autumn afternoon light.

It occurred to Kagami that she hadn't worn those signature twin tails once since that day.

Sayuri was bent slightly at the waist, staring blankly at the drinks inside the vending machine.

Her index finger rested against her lower lip, as if she were deciding what to buy.

Kagami stood watching her for a couple of seconds, then took a deep breath and walked over.

"Sayuri."

He tried to keep his voice sounding natural, the way it always used to.

Sayuri's shoulders twitched slightly.

She straightened up and turned around.

The instant she saw him, Kagami caught the tiniest flicker of expression cross her face.

First, her eyes lit up, just for a moment.

Then that spark went out just as fast, replaced by a polite, distant smile.

"Oh, Kagami."

Her voice was still the same — bright, with a touch of softness.

"Just finished with Professor Kosaka?"

"Yeah, turned in the last batch of documents."

Kagami walked over to stand beside her and pointed at the vending machine.

"What are you getting?"

"Haven't decided yet."

Sayuri turned back to face the machine, as if pondering some very serious question.

"I'm kind of thirsty, but I don't know what I want."

"I'll get it for you."

Kagami said, pulling his wallet out of his pocket.

"No need, I've got it."

Sayuri waved her hand quickly, then dropped coins into the machine and pressed a button.

A can of lemon tea clunked down into the tray.

She bent down, picked it up, and turned to give it a little shake in Kagami's direction.

"Well, I should get going — I've got class this afternoon."

"Sayuri."

Kagami called after her.

Sayuri's footsteps paused, but she didn't turn around.

She only tilted her head slightly, revealing a sliver of pale profile.

"What is it?"

Kagami looked at her back, hesitated for a moment, then spoke.

"Want to grab lunch together? I brought a bento — Shizuku made it, and there's plenty."

Even as he said it, he found it a little ridiculous.

Here he was, Tsushima Kagami, resorting to something as lame as "there's a lot of food in this bento" to try and get a girl to eat with him.

Sayuri was quiet for a moment.

In those few seconds, Kagami heard the wind rustling through the ginkgo trees, golden leaves fluttering down, a few landing on Sayuri's shoulders.

"Sorry."

Sayuri finally spoke, her voice colder than before.

"I already made plans with classmates for a group project. I'm actually running late."

She paused, then added, "Next time, then."

With that, she started walking.

After a couple of steps, she stopped again.

Kagami thought she might turn back — his chest gave an odd little lurch.

But she didn't turn around.

She simply reached up, plucked the ginkgo leaf that had landed on her shoulder, held it up to look at it, and gently blew it away.

The leaf drifted off, spinning in the autumn wind, and settled onto the leaf-covered ground.

It mixed in with all the other leaves, impossible to tell apart anymore.

Then she kept walking.

Her pace was neither fast nor slow, her figure growing smaller down the ginkgo-lined path until she turned a corner and vanished into the shadow of the school building.

Kagami stood there, still clutching his wallet.

A breeze blew past, slipping into his collar, and he suddenly felt cold.

He looked down at his own shadow, cast alone on the ground under the noon sun.

"Next time, again."

The corner of his mouth twisted into something bitter.

The last time she'd said "next time," it had been two weeks ago.

And the time before that, too.

And the time before that.

He'd lost count of how many "next times" there had been by now.

Kagami put his wallet away and turned to walk in the opposite direction.

Toward the cafeteria — exactly the opposite way from where Sayuri had just gone.

He took a few steps, then suddenly stopped.

And turned around again.

Looking at the slope covered in fallen ginkgo leaves.

There was no one at the end of it now.

Only the wind still blowing, only the leaves still falling.

He stood there, replaying the moment Sayuri had turned to leave, over and over in his mind.

That involuntary, fleeting look in her eyes.

Her eyes had genuinely lit up the moment she saw him.

Had everything after that — the politeness, the distance, the courtesy — all been an act?

But why?

Was she punishing him on purpose?

So what exactly had he done to upset her?

Kagami couldn't figure it out.

He pulled out his phone and scrolled to his message thread with Kosaka Akane.

The last exchange had been four days ago.

"Senpai, has Sayuri still not said anything?"

Kosaka Akane had replied: "Nope. She's stubborn as ever. Just give it more time."

He scrolled through his conversation with Machida Sonoko too.

Even earlier, from a week ago.

"Senpai Sonoko, has something been going on with Sayuri lately?"

"We've asked her a bunch of times, she won't say."

"Maybe something with her family? Her parents have both been working overtime lately."

"Don't push too hard, Kagami. Give her some time."

Give her time?

But he didn't think Sayuri, under normal circumstances, would go two whole months ignoring him without giving any reason at all.

Kagami turned off his phone screen and stared at his own reflection in the black glass.

That face was written all over with confusion, irritation, and a faint, hard-to-name sense of grievance.

What had he done wrong?

He didn't know.

He'd wondered several times whether he might have said or done something without meaning to, hurting Sayuri without even realizing it.

But he really hadn't!

He took a deep breath, tucked the phone back into his pocket, and strode off toward the cafeteria.

Food first.

After lunch, he had a seminar on modern literary history in the afternoon.

After class, he'd go home and pack.

Three days until departure.

He'd be at Yale for three weeks.

During those three weeks, an entire Pacific Ocean would separate him from Sayuri.

A thirteen-hour time difference.

Over nine thousand kilometers of distance.

If he didn't get this sorted out now, what would happen over those three weeks?

He didn't dare imagine.

When Kagami walked into the cafeteria, he was planning to find a seat and start on his bento.

His gaze happened to land on a girl in front of him with her hair in twin tails.

She was standing on tiptoe, checking today's menu, her ponytail swinging behind her head.

Her back looked exactly like Sayuri.

Kagami shook his head, wondering if he'd somehow wandered into some romance drama plot about chasing after an estranged wife.

...

Kagami's figure turned the corner at the end of the ginkgo path and disappeared toward the cafeteria.

Sayuri stood in the shadowed corner by the school building, the can of lemon tea in her hand already warm from how tightly she'd been gripping it.

She poked her head out to make sure Kagami was really gone.

Only then did she let out a long breath, her whole body slumping against the wall like a deflated balloon.

"That was close..."

She muttered under her breath, her heart still racing.

She'd rehearsed that scene in front of the vending machine countless times in her head already.

When to turn, when to speak, when to leave.

Every movement, every line, every expression — she'd practiced it all in front of a mirror at home.

She needed to look natural, casual, unrehearsed.

Like it was just a coincidence — a chance encounter, a few casual words, and then having to rush off.

Everything perfectly normal, nothing out of place.

But only she knew that when she'd turned and said "next time," her fingers had pressed white marks into the lemon tea can.

Because the look in Kagami's eyes had been too pitiful...

So pitiful her acting had nearly cracked, so pitiful she'd almost slipped and said too much.

Sayuri tilted her head back, looking up at the eaves of the school building and the small square patch of sky cut off above it.

The autumn sky was high and blue, a few thin clouds drifting slowly across it.

She closed her eyes, and what surfaced in her mind was still the image of Kagami standing by the vending machine.

He'd cut his hair a little shorter.

He'd been wearing a thin, dark gray jacket, the collar of the shirt underneath left unbuttoned at the top.

He looked more grown-up than he had in high school, and a little thinner too.

Was it from being too busy?

Or because of how much she'd been putting him through lately?

The thought made her feel guilty and a little sick with herself.

Just as Sayuri was thinking this, the phone in her pocket buzzed.

She pulled it out and glanced at the screen — an unread message.

It was from Kosaka Akane.

"How'd today's 'chance encounter' go?"

Sayuri stared at the message for two seconds, the corners of her mouth turning down without her meaning to.

She took a deep breath, didn't reply, and just called instead.

It picked up after two rings.

"Hello?"

Kosaka Akane's lazy voice came through, along with the rustle of pages turning — sounded like she was in the library.

"Sayuri? How'd it go?"

"Senpai Akane..."

Sayuri's voice already carried a tremor of tears.

"I'm done for. I've screwed this up completely."

There was silence on the other end for a couple of seconds.

The sound of Kosaka Akane closing her book was clearly audible.

"What do you mean? Didn't we already plan this all out for you?"

"It's just... I turned Kagami down again just now."

Sayuri crouched down, set the lemon tea on the ground, hugged her knees, and wedged the phone between her ear and shoulder.

"He asked if I wanted to have lunch together. I told him I'd made plans with classmates for a project. I panicked and turned him down again."

"And then?"

"And then he just left. He looked so sad."

Sayuri's voice trailed off, getting smaller and smaller.

Kosaka Akane was quiet for a moment on the other end, then let out a short laugh.

"So now you're having regrets?"

Sayuri buried her face in her knees, her voice weak.

"It's just... I feel like I've turned into some kind of terrible woman."

"Kagami really doesn't know anything, and every day he's still trying to figure out how to cheer me up."

"Last week he even went and bought a pudding from that dessert shop I love and left it on my desk."

"But he doesn't know they changed the recipe — it's not as good as it used to be."

"He thought I didn't eat it because I'd stopped liking pudding, so the next day he went and bought a strawberry cake from another shop instead."

"He got in line for that cake at six in the morning, because that shop only sells a limited number each day."

As Sayuri kept talking, her eyes started to well up.

"I've been so selfish and difficult, and he still goes out of his way to buy me cake to try to make me happy."

"And then that day, when he was standing at the classroom door holding the cake box waiting for me, I pretended not to see him and slipped out the back door."

"Later I hid by the window in the stairwell and watched him set the cake on my desk. He picked it back up and looked at it again, but in the end he left it there anyway."

"When he walked away, the look on his face..."

Sayuri's voice caught, and she couldn't continue.

On the other end of the line, Kosaka Akane listened quietly until she finished.

A few seconds passed before she spoke slowly.

"Sayuri, you know what? Everything you just said kind of sounds like bragging."

"I'm not bragging!"

Sayuri jerked her head up.

"I really do feel terrible about it!"

"Kagami's good to everyone — good to Shizuku, good to Shizu, good to Nayotake, good to me, good to Seika, good to all the senpai. He's even nice to stray cats he meets on the street."

"But..."

She bit her lip.

"But the way he's good to me is different from how he's good to everyone else."

"The way you're putting it sounds even more like bragging — like Kagami's uniquely special toward you!"

Kosaka Akane said with a laugh over the phone.

"Hey, don't tease me right now!"

"So?"

"So I got greedy."

Sayuri's voice dropped again.

"At first, when you two told me to let him hang for a while so he'd realize how important I was, I thought it was actually a pretty good idea."

"So I did what you said, and it really worked — Kagami started orbiting around me every day, asking if I was okay, trying every which way to please me."

"And that feeling..."

Sayuri tilted her head back, looking up at the sky.

"That feeling was like he was watching only me."

"Like the way he looks at Shizuku."

Kosaka Akane went quiet on the other end again.

Then she sighed.

"So that's why you got greedy about it?"

"Yeah..."

Sayuri buried her face back in her knees.

"I kept thinking, just one more day, and then I'll tell him the truth. Just one more day."

"And then it turned into one more day, and one more day, and it dragged on until now."

"It went from summer break, to the start of the term, all the way to the end of September."

"Something that could've been cleared up with one sentence, and instead I turned it into this whole mess."

"Do you think he'll find me childish and annoying, and just... just stop liking me?"

The moment the words left her mouth, she froze a little herself.

Stop liking her.

The thought took root and grew like a weed the instant it appeared, refusing to be crushed no matter how hard she tried.

"Senpai Akane, say something."

"Why aren't you saying anything!"

"If you don't answer me I'm going to rat you out!"

"Oh — sorry, bad signal for a second there. I'm listening."

"You just thought I was being a huge pain and wanted to pretend the signal cut out so you could hang up on me, didn't you!"

Sayuri narrowed her eyes, glaring coldly at the phone.

Kosaka Akane's voice sounded perfectly calm.

"Ahaha, of course not."

"I'm your favorite senpai, after all."

"That's right, that's right!"

"So hurry up and help me figure something out, my favorite senpai."

Sayuri nodded eagerly, even though Kosaka Akane couldn't see it.

"Senpai Akane, you're always the one with a plan — you and Senpai Sonoko, please help me think about when's the best time to come clean to Kagami."

"And how should I even bring it up?"

"Should I just say straight out, 'Kagami, I'm sorry, I've been ignoring you on purpose this whole time'? Or should I ease into it from some other topic first?"

"Oh, and should I tell Shizuku first? After all, Shizuku is..."

"Um, Sayuri..."

Kosaka Akane cut her off.

"The idea was originally mine and Machida Sonoko's, sure, but we also told you it'd be best to wrap it up before summer break and just tell Kagami the truth."

"Instead you dragged it all the way to now."

"We were getting anxious too, so we specifically arranged today's 'chance encounter' as an opening for you, and you wasted it."

"We really don't have any more ideas."

Kosaka Akane sighed deeply into the phone.

"So... so what do I do now?"

Sayuri's voice carried a thread of despair.

Silence again on the other end.

Then Kosaka Akane spoke, her tone actually lighter than before.

"Why don't you just go apologize to him directly."

"Things have gotten this messy now — we really don't have a fix."

"Senpai, you—!"

Sayuri panicked.

"How can you say that! Wasn't this whole thing your idea in the first place!"

"Right, we suggested you let him hang a bit. We never told you to drag it out this long."

Kosaka Akane's voice carried a hint of gleeful mischief.

"You're the one who said you got addicted to the feeling of Kagami fussing over you nonstop, and then you kept dragging it out day after day."

"Is that my fault?"

Sayuri had nothing to say to that.

She opened her mouth, wanting to argue back, but realized she really didn't have a leg to stand on.

"Then... then help me figure something out, Senpai."

Her voice softened, taking on a coaxing tone.

"I know you love me the most, Senpai — you must have some kind of plan, right?"

"Nope."

Kosaka Akane's answer was crisp and immediate.

"I already gave you the last plan. You didn't follow through, so that's on you."

"You'll have to seize the moment yourself from here on."

"Whether it's coming clean or apologizing."

"Either way, I've got one condition."

"What condition?"

"Don't rat me and Sonoko out!"

"If you really mess this up, if Kagami really gets mad, you absolutely cannot say it was our idea!"

"Just say it was all your own idea, that it has nothing to do with us!"

"Otherwise you won't just be dealing with Kagami's anger — you'll have two senpai furious at you too!"

Sayuri.

"..."

"You two are the worst!"

She couldn't hold it back and shouted, her voice echoing in the quiet corner.

"You're the ones who told me to do this in the first place! And now that things have gone wrong you're trying to dump it all on me!"

"That's not dumping it on you, that's risk isolation."

Kosaka Akane's voice stayed unhurried.

"Besides, when Sonoko and I told you to let him hang, we never told you to turn him into a total stranger."

"Take a look at what you've actually done over these two months."

"Rejected his bento. Pretended not to see the cake he brought you. Ran away every time you saw him."

"Put yourself in Kagami's shoes — what would you think?"

Sayuri fell silent.

"He'd think Sayuri hates him now, and doesn't want anything to do with him anymore."

Kosaka Akane finished the thought for her.

"What you should really be worried about right now isn't whether he'll stop liking you — it's whether he'll decide you're being inexplicable and just give up on you entirely."

"Kagami's the type — if you don't reach out to him, he won't come chasing after you desperately."

"He'll just retreat to whatever distance makes you comfortable."

"And then that distance will only keep growing."

Sayuri's fingers started to go cold.

"Then... then what do I do now?"

She asked, her voice already stripped of the bravado from before.

On the other end, Kosaka Akane sighed.

"I think you should just go find him and tell him the truth, straight up."

"Just tell him you were doing it on purpose this whole time, because you wanted more of his attention."

"Then apologize, be a little cute about it, and it'll blow over."

"You know Kagami — when has he ever actually stayed mad at you?"

Sayuri bit her lip.

"But... I've kept him hanging for over two months now..."

"Exactly because it's been this long, you need to clear it up now, right away!"

"But..."

"No buts!"

"I'm not talking to you anymore, I've got to get to class."

"And remember — don't you dare drag me and Sonoko into this!"

Then Sayuri heard the click of the call ending.

Sayuri stared blankly at the phone in her hand, and after a long moment, buried her head in her arms.

She sat there with her head in her hands, wearing an expression not unlike Edvard Munch's famous painting The Scream.

This was bad, this was so bad, this was so incredibly bad!

This was turning into a full-blown "chasing after the estranged wife" scenario now!

Sayuri suddenly remembered a story concept Kagami had once pitched to them back in the Manga Research Club days...