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Queen of the Empire - Dramatic Reading (Patreon)

Published:
2025-06-17 12:00:10
Edited:
2026-05-30 22:55:32
Imported:
2026-06

Downloads

Content

Lactils will destroy your planet, yes. But have you ever tried their milk? I'd say it's worth it

Files

Comments

Dustin Willis

Final Dark Greetings to my fellow goblins.

ImBatman

I think there's one more

Mentally Chill 9000

This whole time they thought I wasn't selling blue milk on the side *sneezes blue milk*

LizCanVoice

Dark greeting fellow slavelords

Ethan

Boobie oubzeeb bitch!

Kyle Koehler

Penultimate final Dark Greetings

Free Will

I'm sure I look unhinged listening to this at work while I'm stacking veggies, trying not to laugh like a madman cuz y'alls voices are SO DAMNED ON POINT

krobb1290

Patrick’s calm “here you go” near the beginning was so funny 😂

Bishopmagee

Love these. You guys are awesome

Viet Cong

Man this shit is so great, nice easy listening :).

Pighokey

Damn the book was close to a cute idea - Han could have used the holograms to recreate a scene on Alderaan from Leia's description as part of a surprise wedding ceremony rather than the way the holograms drew from her memory.

Prune Tracy

not Artoo-Detoo dropping the hard R in Lando's presence

tore

49:26 🚨 🚨 🚨

Ferza

WHY THE FUCK WOULD THE PRINCESS STILL HAVE HER FUCKING BIRTH CERTIFICATE!? 🙄

NukeWarm

We've all seen C3-PO's utter lack of mobility. Does this book seriously expect me to believe he got down on his knees, crawled under a vehicle, and then used his arms to pump some lever several times?

LLcoolRay

Never expected Han to get preachy about Global Warming

BurntPickles

I haven't absorbed a single aspect of these readings in terms of plot but have never laughed so hard at something I don't even understand.

NukeWarm

Han and Laya are WANTED TERRORISTS in the eye of the empire. Why the FUCK would they ever allow themselves to be introduced like "Mr. Solo" and even entertain the idea of getting officially married and needing your birth certificate???

LLcoolRay

Hey Charlotte, what were you gonna say instead of "trapped"? 😂

Liz

it took me forever to realize what Patrick's Bithibus voice reminded me of, but it finally hit me- "AAHhhhh the French..."

jay butler

Patricks Debit 101 voice is offensive to robots