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So Tinhy prompted a story full of a lot of things I like. Creepy guys. Innocent girls. Public places. Peril, danger and fear!

I am sort of struggling with the POV of the story.

First Person (creep) - "I decided when I saw her that my family could wait a little longer for me to return home."

Narrator - "He decided that this was fate and and his family could wait for him to get home."

Direction - "You decided that fate has dropped her in your lap and maybe your family could wait a little bit longer for your return."

First Person (girl) - "I didn't notice that I was being stalked by a stranger who was going to take the opportunity that I was presenting him."

So...

I am going to let YOU guys give me a first line to this story. Some of you (a LOT of you) are great writers and although I guarantee that I am going to rewrite whatever you give me so I can take full credit of it (muhaha).

You don't have to use my story if you have one for yourself. It doesn't even have to be Little Lorna. (eg. the girl, Alice, Marcie etc) but I will be leading the story as Tinhy's original that he leads her into a bathroom.

Keep it short (20-150 words) and I will be starting this short story soon!

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Comments

RH

Hmmmmm ... "My friends had been telling me that I needed to learn to live in the moment . . . and then She stopped right in front of me . . . "

Daring Warlock

You're backpacking across Europe to satisfy your wanderlust, when your more primal lust start to itch.

Aaron S.

Definitely most creepy from hearing the story through his mind… but I feel your writing lends itself to the girl’s pov. So perhaps hang your hat (and handcuffs) on that option.

Aaron S.

“I was exhausted from waiting. My old junior high bestie Ara, was supposed to meet up with me three hours ago, and give me a tour of her life there in Belgium. She was on a study abroad scholarship. We had been planing this trip for months, and once I had saved up enough cash from my afterschool “extra-curriculars” I bought myself a ticket to come visit. Little did I know I was being stalked the whole time I was waiting for her by this devilish looking creep! No matter where I went, he followed me and discovered maybe I was lost and the perfect tourist to play the part in his sick perverse affairs… what was I to do? If I asked for help I didn’t know the language, and if I just ignored him I knew it was going to play into his game of cat and mouse. So I made up my mind and took matters in my own hands: I was going to seduce him and flip the script! So I first made sure he was watching and removed my underwear right there in the middle of the station! And made solid eye contact while leading him towards the lady’s bathroom.” Dot dot dot…