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Sanitary Conditions (Patreon)

Published:
2019-04-15 02:44:12
Imported:
2026-06
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Content

Raccoon Chef, next on Food Network

Files

Previews only

Comments

Brian

That was Franklin Delano, not Teddy.

Anonymous

Wrong Roosevelt haha

Anonymous

I'm surprised that the question there is 'lower employment prospects?' and not 'acromegaly?'. I mean I looked it up, but it leads me to think they've had a previous conversation about acromegaly for some reason.

Erin Hartshorn

I vote for Raccoon Chef for the next bonus comic!

Mordaeus

I'm ready for a raccoon chef spin-off

Bagge

“The things that will destroy America are prosperity at any price, peace at any price, safety first instead of duty first and love of soft living and the get-rich-quick theory of bears.” ― Theodore Roosevelt

Bagge

“A vote is like a bear: its usefulness depends upon the character of the user.” ― Theodore Roosevelt

Bagge

“Never throughout history has a bear who lived a life of ease left a name worth remembering.” ― Theodore Roosevelt

Erin Moriarty

I feel like every other cartoon Jeph brings up a concept that I'd love to see as a spinoff

Bagge
>>21781044

Or maybe shorter: “The things that will destroy America are bears." ― Theodore Roosevelt

mano

We don't have bears around here but the racoons are really helpful for the cherry harvest. The tree was picked completely clean one morning!

Dean Reilly

Faye has half a dozen raccoons working illegally at Union Robotics.

kaitou

"Talk softly and carry a big bear; you will go far." ― Theodore Roosevelt

Jerry K. Sweeney

This from the Department of Pettifoggery: Faye attributed the quotation to the wrong Roosevelt.

Summer Sudbrink

Well now I want to see Pintsize as a raccoon furry short order cook.

Anonymous

So, i guess now we know that an American Ratatouille would star a raccoon... what would we call it?

Jason Doege

Raccoon chef for bonus comic!

Anonymous

I gotta say, Faye is looking radiantly beautiful and very happy, but I would take relationship advice from a tree stump before I would from her. Everything she has she owes to Bubbles being able to hold perfectly still while very near till Faye finally got the picture. She is not the very sharpest tool in the kit. Several mallets in the kit are sharper, in fact. Perfectly smart, you understand. Just not real perceptive.

Joe

boy, the last phrase I expected to read today was "full body hair net".

Holly Nelson

Hey! If it was an AI raccoon, the whole body net could be a Faraday cage!

Peter McDevitt

sadly, Raccoon Chef was cancelled when he kept asking for that guy's eye.

Joe

think I might use "Full Body Hair Net" as the name of my Tom Jones tribute band. any objections, Jeph??

BobC

OK, I'll ask the question if nobody else will: Is Jeph trolling us?

Dan Isaacs

Teddy plays better with the bear theme, but yeah, FDR said that.

Colin

Beans for the bear king