Reading Lunar Phases Ch 2 (Patreon)

Disclaimer: Don’t own PJO or the Whiskered Warrior.

“Okay, I read the first chapter. I’m not reading the second,” Thalia said firmly.

“I’ll read it.” Annabeth offered. The Lieutenant of Artemis gave her a grateful look and offered the book over.

“You’re a godsend, Annie.”

“I know.”

“So modest, Wise Girl.” Percy teased. She smirked at him before cracking the book open.

“‘The Cursed Knight, Part Two.’”

“I’m starting to think Naruto isn’t the cursed one the title is mentioning,” Piper hummed. Jason arched a brow and she shook her head. “I’ll elaborate in a bit, we've only just started.”

Prey.

That which nourishes the predator, the prey is the weaker of the two types of animal. Humans consider themselves the Apex, which is true given their penchant for using tools. Without this, however, they would be at a loss.

Like Naruto currently was.

Words eluded him, as he sat utterly flabbergasted bound by rope and pushed against the far wall of the mercenaries’ yacht’s cabin.

“...A lot has happened in between pages, it would seem.” Athena mused.

“An understatement if ever we’ve heard one.” Poseidon huffed. “But then, that’s what we should expect from your observations.”

It really was the absolute last scenario to cross his mind when he initially brought the mercenaries’ yacht into the San Francisco dock. Well, more so he turned the wheel and hoped the engine would carry him fast enough at the slowest setting. A sailor he was not, but Alf had been sure to instill a basic familiarity of sea craft in him before they parted ways.

“Is he a sea god too or something?” Percy asked, looking at his father. Poseidon took a deep breath, visibly tightening his grip on his Trident before answering.

“No, son. The Norse...were gods of vikings.”

“...Ohh, so–?” Whatever question Percy was going to ask died on his lips when he saw his father’s brows furrowed. “Never mind, I got it.” 

Regardless, after he docked the yacht and disembarked, he was ambushed. Shocked, stabbed, and shot in either arm with an arrow, he was downed and bound by the questers in record time. The last blow prior to his binding probably hurt his pride most; Grover Underwood forced him to run face first into a wall by way of Satyr magic.

Truly, Hillary Duff was a sadist of a vocalist if her music could cause such misery.

“Preach it.” Thalia snorted.

“Let me see if I can understand your logic.” The bound mortal among the group scowled at his sister. He was still sore from the arrow in his shoulder. “Because I came back to life after supposedly being visited by Valkyrie—”

“I’m still not sure what those are exactly,” Percy said from where he manned the helm. “I mean, are they some sort of harpy variant? Because I think we should upgrade.”

“Oh really?” Annabeth raised an eyebrow. At her boyfriend.

“What can I say? I love a woman that can kick my butt.” Percy grinned.

“Hm.” 

“Jackson, please just steer the boat.” Zoë grumbled, pinching the bridge of her nose. The boy muttered under his breath, but did as was told. From where he was tied up, Naruto looked over at the others in the cabin.

Thalia was leaning against the wall to his left with her arms crossed, the jacket given to her by Aphrodite replaced with a loosely fitting leather jacket she’d appropriated from a locker under the deck, and her foot tapped impatiently on the floor.

“Better. Still would’ve preferred my jacket.” Thalia groused.

“Your ungratefulness is noted, Grace.” Aphrodite huffed.

“Don’t call me that.”

Her eyes still glimmered with static. Bianca, nearer to Zoë than the Campers, rocked uncertainly from one side to the next, doing her best to keep her primed bow aimed at his head. Grover was chowing down on some playing cards beside their fourteen-year-old helmsman, and Zoë stood between him and them all, right in front of her bound captive. The Hunters’ Lieutenant leveled him with a flat glare.

“Thou had died.” She said, pointing at him with her index finger. “Mortal cardiopulmonary resuscitation had no impact. Whatever overtook you, or still has you in its thrall—”

“It doesn’t!” He growled.

“That’s not going to help his argument in the slightest.” Reyna noted.

Hm, in hindsight, that probably wasn’t going to help his argument.

“Clearly.” Zoë agreed with his musing. Dammit. 

“Called it.” Reyna smiled in amusement. 

She crossed her arms. “It is unlike anything I’ve ever seen before. That much malice…Even Ares’ could not muster up that much hate in someone.”

“I dunno, Aphrodite probably could.” Thalia grumbled.

“Snap!” Leo chuckled. He gasped abruptly and crossed his legs with a wince on his face. “Sorrysorrysorrysorry!”

“As I thought you would be.” Aphrodite hummed, snapping her fingers again and returning his undergarments to their proper size.

“That’s not okay.” Hephaestus scowled at her.

“Well, teach your children to respect girls’ feelings.” Aphrodite huffed.

“Pithos, meet pot.” Artemis snorted. The goddess of Love smirked at her.

“Still not the right terminology, Artemis.” 

Her eye twitched and her hand tightened around her jacket’s sleeve. 

“True.” Zoë mused, scrutinizing him anew. Probably thinking he’d had some illicit affair. If that were true, why hadn’t he been reduced to smoldering ash by the goddess of love’s madman on a leash and instead granted a weapon that was, judging by the effect it had on his kills, made of Stygian Iron. If that were true, how Naruto could wield it, he wasn’t yet sure.

“He shouldn’t be able to.” Hades rubbed his chin. “Besides, as far as I’m aware, Ares has no access to it.”

“Still, it butchered those mercs good!” Ares grinned.

“Indeed, which is why I doubt its legitimacy.” 

Problems for later. A deep rumble whispered in the back of his mind.

“Zoë,” he sighed and looked her in the eyes. “Please, believe me. I swear on my birth mother’s grave, I’m still me.”

Zoë pursed her lips. Thalia’s tapping foot stopped and Bianca’s rocking halted, both girls watched the quest leader intently. None of them spoke, rather it was the Satyr who broke the silence.

“Okay, look, I usually try to avoid being devil's advocate because…Satyr,

“What?” Jason frowned.

“Satan, Lucifer, The “capitalized D” Devil, whatever you call him, is most commonly depicted as a dark satyr,” Apollo said, waving his hand. “Early Christians used relics depicting Pan’s likeness to turn people away from our pantheon.”

“Still never understood why I couldn’t slit those bastards’ throats.” Hermes grumbled.

“They were honoring us indirectly. Killing them would’ve only made their stance seem more powerful,” Zeus said.

but when he went all rage mode back on the pier, he didn’t attack us. That has to count for something, right?” Grover asked.

“The goat’s facts check out.” Apollo nodded, glasses on his face as he held up a photo of the passage. “For now.”

“Foreshadowing?” His favorite immortal brother asked.

“I call it fore-thrilling!” 

“You need to workshop that.” Hermes shook his head.

“What? Nah, it’s fine. I came up with it, after all.” Apollo waved him off.

It was official, Naruto liked him the most. He was going to convince his mother to sign a napkin or something for this Satyr. Maybe even convince her to give him one of her arrows. Physically. Hand it over. By hand. By his hand, if need be.

“Grover,” Thalia looked at him with a frown. “Are you sure your magic didn’t have a delay or something?”

Ouch. That hurt more than he expected it to.

“Thalia, my magic hadn’t even left my pipes before the Val, uh, the winged girls showed up.”

“Still want an explanation on them—”

“I don’t approve of your focus on Valkyries.” Annabeth grumbled, giving her boyfriend a sidelong glare.

“What? I’d pick you every day of the week. No one judo flips me like you can.”

“...Wait, have you two…?” Frank blinked before gaping. “Is that why you keep saying you have judo lessons?!”

“You told Frank?!” Annabeth scowled, before looking at the boy. “No offense, Frank.”

“Some taken, but I get it. Didn’t really want to know.”

“That we take judo lessons together? Yes!” Percy frowned. “Annabeth, I don’t understand why you are getting so upset.”

“Because you…told him…oh no.” Annabeth groaned. Leo started laughing and she glared at him. “Shut it, Valdez!”

“Oh, no way! That’s hilarious!” Piper giggled once she got it. Many of the gods started to snicker, and Annabeth shrank down in her seat.

“What?” Percy asked, frowning. “Why is everyone laughing?”

“Don’t worry about it.” Annabeth grumbled and returned to the book.

“Percy, at this point, you should probably let it go.” Grover advised. He stepped around Zoë, giving her a wide berth, before kneeling at Naruto’s left side. “So, um, you promise you’re not gonna go all berserker wild man on us if we untie you, right?”

“Oh my—Helios, Selene, Cthulhu, Primus, grant me patience.”

“Why doesn’t he ask us?” Apollo frowned.

“You? Have patience?” Artemis snorted. “You’d have to make a passable haiku before that would ever happen.”

“...You are so hurtful.”

He pleaded, looking at the ceiling before looking at the Satyr. “I swear on the Styx, on the Oath of my Mother, and on my parents’ graves that I will not go ‘berserker wild man’ on you if you untie me.”

“He only goes ‘beserker wild man’ on Thalia.” Piper snorted, while her mother swooned at the thought.

“Piper, please think about my safety before you say things like that.” Jason sighed, protecting his girlfriend from the thunderous glare his sister had locked on her.

“Our safety!” Leo whimpered, cradling his snack bowl for comfort. “C’mon, I’ve already been injured!”

“That was your own fault.” Piper shook her head.

Thunder boomed around them.

“See? That wasn’t so hard!” Grover smiled at the others. “If he was still possessed he wouldn’t have made those oaths.”

“Very well. Bianca, lower your bow.” Zoë approached and the Satyr backed away. She knelt and cut the ropes that kept him bound. “Percy, keep due west, and slow us to five knots. The horizon must be at the perfect time for us to enter the Garden.”

“Garden?” Naruto frowned as he got to his feet and looked out the window. Lightning cracked at the tip of the mountained isle they approached. He blinked and looked at the others. “What’d I miss?”

“A lot, apparently. Like we did.” Nico drawled.

“Don’t worry,” Percy shrugged. “Someone will explain it, I’m sure.”

“Well,” Bianca willed away her bow and sat down, looking a little green from the sway of the boat. Apparently she did not have her sea legs yet. “We found the Ophiotaurus that  Lady Artemis was hunting.”

“C’mon, guys, her name is Bessie!”

“A boy and his sea cow,” Thalia said with a smirk.

“Dam straight!”

“Percy Jackson, you’re toeing the line.” Hestia warned with a frown.

“Er, sorry, Lady Hestia.”

“Percy, he’s a boy.” Grover sighed. The stubborn son of Poseidon huffed.

“That’s not what she told me.”

“...Is that what happened?” Hazel asked. “Bessie identified as a female?”

“Not for me.” Percy sighed. “I genuinely thought Bessie was a girl. She–he looked like a cow, not a bull.”

“That’s the animal that could grant the power to slay gods to whoever killed it, right?” Naruto asked, looking at Zoë.

“Yes.” She nodded, still watching him warily. Well, his clothes were still soaked with blood, so he couldn’t fault her for that. “The Ophiotaurus has been the subject of The General’s hunt. We believe him to barter Lady Artemis for it, or if he finds it himself, to make use of her as a hostage and cull Olympus one god at a time.”

“That’s...That’s a horrifying thought.” Demeter mumbled.

“Bring it on!” Ares grinned.

“You’d be dead before you could get your favorite ‘toys’ out.” Athena deadpanned.

“Pfft, like you’d last so long!”

“Two more questions.” He crossed his arms. “First, who’s The General?”

“Atlas.” The Lieutenant spat the name like it was poison.

“Joy.” He grumbled before rubbing his face. “My second question, do you have my shirt?”

“Thou wilt need its magic.” Zoë tossed it to him with a huff. “Not that it’s boon had done thee well thus far.”

“Yeah, well, I doubted Granma expected me to get shot in the neck.” He looked at Percy. “Glad you’re okay.”

“Uh, yeah.”

“Where’s your jacket?”

“The jacket was the Nemean Lion’s pelt. I offered it to Dad so he would protect Bessie.”

“Really?!” Naruto’s eyebrows shot to the top of his head. It was impressive that the son of Poseidon managed to slay a beast with impenetrable—Oh.

“And his near death experience was just made meaningless.” Nico shook his head. “Great job, Percy.”

“Okay, that’s not my fault! I didn’t know!” Percy frowned.

“Convenient excuse is convenient.” Thalia snorted.

“Oh, go make out with ‘Whiskers’!”

“He’s not even real.” Thalia huffed, no longer phased as much by the retort.

“Does that mean he’s your imaginary boyfriend, then?” Nico asked, smirking. The Hunter glared at him.

“Di Angelo, I will destroy you–!”

“Children, please.” Hestia sighed.

“...Sorry, Lady Hestia.” The three apologized, glaring at each other.

“Ah.” He tightened his grip on his shirt. He closed his eyes and turned for the door, before looking at his mother’s lieutenant. “I need some fresh air.”

Zoë made him wait for a moment before she nodded. He left the cabin, mind swirling and braced himself on the stairwell. His arm throbbed and he glanced at it, the Norse runes had rearranged to hide themselves amongst a more modern tattoo sleeve based on, if he remembered right, the story of Hati and Sköll, the wolves that hunted the Moon and the Sun.

“...They what?” Apollo gaped. “Am I gonna get dogged by a freakin dog!?”

“I’d not be felled by some wolf.” Artemis huffed at the audacity of the notion. She was the huntress, not the prey.

“They’re Norse interpretations,” Athena said to placate the twins.

“Thank Us.” Apollo sighed in relief while Artemis grunted.

The one chasing the sun, Sköll, turned its eyes to meet his.

Let’s chat, Boy.

No. Naruto pushed on and left the yacht’s interior. He needed fresh air.

“Bring me all your beer.” Ares said in a menacing growl. “Bleh, who does that? Talk about a razor blade down the throat.”

“Batman?” Frank offered as an option. 

“It’s just not the same anymore.” Apollo sighed. “West did it best.”

“...Didn’t he do a funky disco dance in one episode?”

“What’s your point, Zhang?”

Just be cool. Be cool. Thalia thought to herself as she climbed up to the deck that Whiskers had ascended to shortly after he’d been cut loose. You just want to ask him about the Valkyries, that’s all. Don’t get too angry if he starts acting cute. Not that he has to—no, that he is! Dammit!

“Oh, come on.” Thalia groaned into her hand. “Why!? Just…why!?”

“Nalia.” Aphrodite smirked.

“No!”

“This other version of me is going to be an uncle, too, the lucky jerk!” Jason pouted, making his girlfriend snicker.

“You’re not helping!” Thalia hissed at her brother.

You are fighting me tooth and nail here, girl. Aphrodite sighed. The sound of faint scraping, suspiciously like a nail file, faintly followed her words. If that jab earlier was anything to go by, I’m going to have to make you work for it at this point.

Oh, the horror. Thalia rolled her eyes before spotting her target. Of interrogation. And nothing else—focus!

“Hey, Whiskers!”

He didn’t acknowledge her. He was leaning on the railing, eyes locked on something in the distance across the waves. His sinfully tight Moon Knight shirt once more covering his frame — given the amount of blood that was on his souvenir t-shirt, it wasn’t too surprising to find he’d switched out for it — and his hair blew softly in the wind. Okay, so he was thinking about something. Fine, he’s allowed to do that.

“Whiskers?” Thalia asked as she approached. Whiskers whirled around to face her, his hand on the hilt of his axe. She braced, tightening her grip on the mace canister she kept in her new jacket’s pocket, and was relieved when he let out a breath.

“Geez, Thalia.” He groused and turned back to the water. “Don’t sneak up on me like that.”

Ugh, what was with boys and their need for bravado?

“Save it, sis.” Apollo drawled.

“…very well.” Artemis put the scroll she’s just manifested away.

“I said your name twice.” She pointed out.

“Sorry.” He ran a hand over his face and then through his hair. “Just…lost in thought.”

Perfect set up. Thalia could just use that and ask him about the valkyries. …any second now. Just say the words. Easy peasy. 

Okay, what was happening right now?

Must I explain everything to you? You’re not an emotionless drone, Thalia, Aphrodite scoffed. Your hero is in turmoil! The internal conflict he can’t work out alone, now’s your chance! Help him!

“Now kiss.” Aphrodite put two dolls together by the face.

“What—Why do they look like me and him?!” Thalia exclaimed in horror. 

“Because I needed something to get this ship moving!”

“Father, quick, Aphrodite has resorted to that Haitain magick!” Artemis gasped. “The Voo-Doo! You must destroy her before it’s too late!”

“Sorcery most foul.” Apollo said forebodingly, fingers laced.

“...Aphrodite, please cease with the voodoo dolls.” Zeus drawled, ignoring the pout on Artemis’ face and the shrug from her twin. He looked at the twins. “You two, keep such outbursts at a minimum.”

“Very well,” Aphrodite flicked the dolls away, and they vanished from existence. She held up elaborately made marionette puppets.

“Oh, come on!” Thalia gaped. “How do you even have those!?”

“Thalia, I’m a master string puller. Ask Apollo.”

“...Un-cool.” Apollo sank in his throne as his twin glared heatedly at him.

I did not ask for your advice!

“Um,” she licked her suddenly dry lips. Yes! Progress! See? She just needed some water or something. “What did Hades look like to you?”

No! What?! Dammit, Brain, you had one job!

“Wow, Thalia pulled a Percy.” Nico chuckled.

“Hey!” Both indicated teens scowled at the son of Hades.

“I don’t think I ever went.”

“What?” What? Both she and Aphrodite were apparently thrown for a loop.

“I didn’t go to the Underworld. Before-before I came back, I woke up in a sewer, Thalia.” Whiskers stared out at the passing sea. His hands tightened around the railing. “A massive, flooded sewer with green, odorless water that went on for miles, but at the end of it was a cage. And in that cage was a fox.”

“A fox?” Thalia arched her brow. That hardly sounded like something capable of the carnage they found when they boarded the yacht. At least Percy was adept at cleaning things up by now. Must’ve been handy when he got outhouse duty. Or, wait, was that the reason why he never got outhouse duty?

“I’m not allowed to.” Percy smirked. “Not since my first day at Camp.”

“And we’re all so proud of you for standing up to your bullies, Percy.” Leo snorted. “You’ve moved on to pull-ups, too, right?”

“Funny, Valdez.” The son of Poseidon drawled.

“Dampers are apparently awesome.” Hermes noted. “Best sales in the business.”

“...Learned a lot about you today, bro.” Apollo blinked. “I need brain bleach. Yo, D!”

“No!” Dionysus cheerfully declined the request. He slumped in his throne and cracked yet another Diet Coke.

Whiskers’ grumbles stirred her from her ADHD riddled thought process.

“It wasn’t, like, a small red fox,” he corrected himself. “I don’t even think it was a fox—I’m talking about something that was easily five times the size of an Olympian. It’s fur was filthy, and voids surrounded its red eyes and…and those eyes were more than intelligent. They weren’t just angry. They were furious.” 

“Being stuck inside of some wannabe Batman? I’d be miffed, too.” Ares snorted.

“Oh me, how can you be so uncultured!” Apollo asked, dragging his hands down his face. “He’s a Moon Knight expy!” 

“Thank you! I was gonna say something, but you beat me to it.” Piper nodded.

“You’re welcome! Here’s a thought, we should start a comic book club–”

“Stop flirting with the demigods.” Artemis deadpanned. Apollo pouted while Piper grimaced and Jason scowled at him.

“Don’t ruin my fun!”

Whiskers hands rested atop the railing and balled into fists. He squeezed his eyes shut and grit his teeth.

“I’ve never been more afraid of anything in my life than I was of that thing.”

“Geez…And I thought limbo was bad.” She snorted.

“...Oh gods, Thalia.” Hazel gasped, covering her mouth while Frank winced.

“What?” Thalia looked at her with a frown.

“Seriously?” Jason rubbed his face and Piper pinched the bridge of her nose.

“What? What’s wrong with what I said?”

“That’s just...wow.” Leo shook his head.

“What?!”

“He literally just died and told you about it!” Nico pointed at the screen.

“So what?” She arched her brow. “I’ve died, too.” 

“You just made light of his now-meaningless death.” Annabeth explained. Thalia blinked.

“What? No I didn’t. I was making a…a joke.” Realization dawned on her and she sank into her seat. “Oh.”

Wrong words apparently, because the glare he leveled on her was nothing short of frigid.

Oh, Thalia Grace. Aphrodite lamented with a groan. You were doing so well! I was impressed.

“I was. Then you blew it.” Aphrodite sighed. “Oh well, I’ll just have to find another to set him up with. Oh, why not my strongest –?”

“Pass.” Piper deadpanned.

“I never said daughter, Piper, but if you’re so interested…”

“Your jokes aren’t as funny as you think they are, Mom.”

“I never said it was a joke, either.”

“...Your mom scares me.” Jason whispered.

“You think this is funny?” He turned to face her and pointed at the deck, the barest remains of flesh and blood residing upon it after Percy did his Aqualad impersonation. “Thalia, I might’ve just sold my soul to come back and finish this quest! I have no idea what the hell that thing was, what it could want from me, or where it came from! And I made a deal with it! I have to live with that! And you want to crack jokes?!”

“No, I wasn’t—that isn’t what—!” Gods, why was talking to him so hard? Ever since he and Apollo picked them up, she’d been unable to keep her composure around him. Aphrodite’s little peanut gallery was not helpful. Gods, the whole thing was so frustrating! So he died and came back? Big whoop, so what? She did the same thing!

Eyes turned to Thalia, who did her best not to squirm. 

“Okay, so I sort of get what happened.”

It hit her like a lightning bolt.

Ahh, the circle gets the square. Aphrodite’s very unwelcome commentary almost made her lose her cool.

“—so are we done talking now? Fine by me.” He pushed off of the railing and started to walk by her.

“Both teens’ emotions raged and from it emerged a passion–”

“Not funny.” Artemis deadpanned.

“Hm, true. It’s a bit too cliché at this point. That was all the Apoluto’s bit.”

“Yeah–Hey.” Apollo scowled.

“Hey, no!” Thalia turned and grabbed his arm. He faced her with anger in his eyes and she matched it easily. “We’re not done talking, you jerk! You died, Whiskers!“

“Yeah, I did. I thought we went over this in the cabin.” He huffed. Thalia scowled at him.

“You. Died.” Her hand moved off of his arm and balled into a fist, before she lowered it to her side. She took a deep breath to calm down. Anger wasn’t going to help them here. She ducked her head, swallowed her pride, before lifting her head back up and meeting his eyes. “And I’m-I’m sorry that I made light of it. I shouldn’t have said that. I just-..Naruto, I’ve been through it, too.”

“...Wow, she apologized.” Hera smiled in amusement. 

“Thalia is a caring person, Hera. I’m proud to have her as my Lieutenant.” Artemis defended her newest sister-in-arms.

“Oh, I wasn’t taking a shot at her, Artemis. I can see where that misunderstanding would be made, though.”

“...We will be discussing this later, Hera.” Zeus rumbled. His wife smirked at him.

“I’m sure we will.”

She’d died. Partially, sure, but it was death all the same. And had been frozen in that state for…gods, five years. She still didn’t like thinking about it.

“Yeah, I don’t. And no, we’re not talking about it.” Thalia glared at the others. “Ever.”

“Oh.”

His anger rushed out of him like a balloon losing air, shoulders falling just a fraction as the fight left. Part of Thalia internally cheered that she won that encounter, but it didn’t feel like much of a victory worth celebrating. They stood quietly for a moment. He moved first, turning back to lean against the railing. She didn’t, and instead watched him.

The way his features were framed by the morning li—

You are so not invited to this conversation.

“Rude! I was adding atmosphere!” Aphrodite huffed.

“More like you were making up nonsense,” Artemis said.

“No, she was attempting to get into character development.” Apollo wobbled his hand. “Kind of a narrative tone, but I see what she was going for.”

“Well, whatever it was was nonsensical and pointless.” 

“See if I subscribe you to A Nice Young Lady Reads Smut!” Aphrodite huffed.

“Ooh, is their latest out?” Hermes asked, eyebrows rising in interest.

“Please stop having this discussion in front of children!” Demeter harrumphed. “They’re already too close to one pedophile for my liking.”

“That’s uncalled for. I had approval to wed her from his Majesty.”

“Ahem, read on, Annabeth Chase!” Zeus urged, ignoring his siblings’ and wife’s glower.

Ugh, spoilsport. Fine. I’ll just watch. Happy?

Ecstatic. Thalia huffed and crossed her arms.

“Yes! Voyeurism was approved!”

“Wha–No!” Thalia shouted, face ablaze.

“Thalia?” Whiskers voice pulled her out of her bickering with the Lady of Doves. His hands balled into fists and his jaw flexed before he looked at her again. “Do you think it always feels so-so..?”

“Cold?” She did her best to ignore the familiar chill that went up her spine. This jacket probably just wasn’t as warm as the last one. Or as her original one.

“Yeah.”

Thalia leaned against the railing beside him. The waves were gentle and the barest hint of the rising sun began to peak over the horizon.

“Aww, Uncle P! Did you give them that little sway?” Apollo grinned.

“Well, perhaps I have, mayhaps I haven’t.” Poseidon shrugged. “Perhaps Percy is giving Thalia a helpful nudge with his helmsman skill.”

“Nope.” Percy chirped.

Athena smirked at her rival. “Modest, isn’t he?”

“I’m surprised you can even recognize the trait.” Poseidon shot back.

She swallowed before speaking again.

“I really hope not.”

“Me, too.”

More silence fell. A more peaceful one than the last. No pressure to speak, no weight. Just them, and the ocean.

“Hey, Thalia?”

“What?”

“When’s your birthday?”

“Planning already?” Aphrodite smiled. “So thoughtful.”

“Not for the reasons you think.” Artemis sneered.

“December Twenty-Second.”

“..Oh.”

“Yeah.” Tomorrow. Solstice. End of Olympus and possibly the world.

“No, that’s still two years away.”

“Funny, Kelp Head.” Thalia snorted.

She crossed her arms. “When’s yours?“

“October Tenth.”

“Mm.” Thalia furrowed her brows. Crap, he had her on months. Unless… “Were you born in Eighty-seven?”

“Eighty-five.” He looked at her, a brow arched when she scowled. “Why?”

“Dammit.”

“What?” 

“You were always older than me.” She sighed. He snorted and she thumped his arm. “Shut up. I thought the stupid tree thing gave you an edge.”

“Is age even a competition to you?” Jason asked his sister warily. 

“Not anymore.” The Hunter dryly remarked. 

“Sure.” Nico snorted. “Missed out on getting that license by one hour. Percy, how’s your driving lessons going?”

“...Uh, I haven’t wrecked yet. Wait, why am I being brought into this?”

“Because that.” Nico pointed at Thalia’s scowling face. “So much for not being competitive about age.”

“That’s not the same!”

“Uh-huh. Whatever helps you sleep at night.”

“Wait, what tree thing?”

“I’m physically fifteen-years-old.”

“Wh—Seriously?”

“Seriously.”

“...I just thought you were short.” She thumped him again.

“And cue shortstack joke.” Leo snorted. Piper whacked his arm, choking on a laugh.

“...I don’t know why, but I feel like you deserve to be electrocuted for that alone.” Thalia drawled, glaring at him.

“Jerk.” Thalia huffed. “Magic blows.”

“Tell me about it.” He scoffed before going pensive once more. “Got any plans to get out of the whole Grand Prophecy thing?”

“How do—?” Her eyes narrowed at him. “Your uncle told you.”

“Uncle Fred told me,” he nodded. She frowned and then sighed.

“No. I dunno. I guess I’ll…wing it?”

“Because that’s done wonders for you so far.” Whiskers smirked. “Tree Girl.”

“Do not call me that.” She shoved him around a half-laugh as his smirk grew. A golden eyebrow rose up.

“You ever gonna stop calling me Whiskers?” He asked. She smirked back at him.

“Never.”

“Ah, the art of tsundere foreplay. It has commence!” Aphrodite cackled like a loon. 

“I’m not a Soon-Dairy!” 

“Tsundere.” Apollo corrected her. She glared at him and he held his hands up. “Pronunciation correction, not accusation!”

“Whatever! I’m not one!”

“Clearly neither is this one.” Annabeth nodded. “This Thalia has her flirt game on.”

“Wh–Annie!” 

“You do!” Annabeth rolled her eyes, grinning at her aghast friend. “Now we have ‘Whiskers’ and ‘Tree Girl’. Those are names that stick, Thalia. Right, Seaweed Brain?”

“Got that right, Wise Girl.”

“...I hate all of you.” Thalia grumbled.

“Then Tree Girl it is,” he affirmed with a nod. She shoved him again, huffed and looked away, trying to will back the heat that threatened to overcome her face when he softly laughed her punishment off. Thalia looked back at him in time to see him turn towards her, resting his side on the rail of the yacht deck. “So, Tree Girl, I think I can help you with your…Grand dilemma.”

“Ugh, and now you’ve got puns?

“The son of the Goddess of Comedy!”

“Shut up, Apollo.” Artemis rolled her eyes.

Someone shoot me.”

“Careful, someone just might.” She stuck her tongue out at him. His smile dimmed, but a corner of his lips remained pulled back. “Seriously, though. I might be able to help.”

“How?” Thalia gave him a wary frown. “You got another contract in your head?”

“No.” He pulled a die out of his pocket, the faces marked with a sun and a moon. “But… I do have one last favor to cash in.”

“...No. No. NO. NO!” Zeus raged. “That boy damn well better not do what he’s thinking!”

“It’s not like he’s thinking of laying with her,” Hades said dryly. As ever, his skill in ignoring the glares of other Olympians was displayed with talent.

“That is not why I’m upset and you know it!”

“A favor—?” She choked on her spit. Aphrodite gasped.

Jackpot~!

Shut it! Thalia hissed. She eyed the die warily. “What kind of favor.”

“A favor from a god of time.” Whiskers words hung in the air around them for a good minute. Thalia was by no means stupid and easily connected the dots he was laying out for her.

I take it back. Aphrodite suddenly whispered. Do not let him do this.

“...Oh!” Aphrodite blinked. She giggled. “Oh, very clever.”

“What di–That...is diabolical.” Athena realized.

“What? What?!” Artemis asked, frowning.

“I...I may as well warn you.” Athena sighed. “Aphrodite will manipulate Thalia Grace into accepting this deal, not for the ‘Nalia’, but to ensure that you cannot protect your son by inducting him to the Hunt.”

“Oh, you airheaded bimbo!”

“That master plan sounds like something from an airheaded bimbo to you? I’m concerned about your strategic value in any further conflicts.” 

“I was aiming to insult!” 

“Well,” Aphrodite smirked. “You missed the mark.”

“...Oh, shit.” Apollo gaped, watching his twin’s eyes glow while her hands tightened on the arms of her throne. “Everyone, effs in chat!”

“...What?” Percy asked for the group.

“Effs–Right, demigods. Can’t use tech. Ugh.” Apollo rubbed his eyes. “A moment of silence for Artemis’ latest loss in her contest of wit against Aphrodite.”

So, that means I should definitely let him do this.

No! Aphrodite started to sound angry. Good. Thalia Grace, don’t you dare! You will not accept! Don’t do it!

“A-Are you sure?” She asked, once she could find her voice. He cracked a small smile and Thalia could’ve sworn the sun chariot passed by in that instant. Aphrodite raged in the back of her mind, but she ignored it and focused on Whiskers bright blue eyes.

“I think you’ve done enough for Olympus, don’t you?”

Okay, she thought. So, maybe I do have a small crush on Whiskers.

“No, don’t admit it–!” Thalia made furious Thalia noises.

“...Can we get to a bomb shelter or something before that goes off?” Reyna asked.

“No, we’ve done the math.” Jason shook his head.

In the shadows of the Duat, a lone sphere of silver illuminated the night sky. Directly beneath it, seated on a throne, a lone man in fine garments stared into a reflective mirror, where a young man stood on a naval craft.

“Khonsu’s pad is pretty shway.” Apollo rubbed his chin. “Mine’s still cooler, though.”

“Ah, the one on Hyperborean Hill?” Hermes asked. Apollo nodded. The God of Messengers scowled. “I hate driving there. Sweet pad, though.”

“Well, I can’t say I’ve seen this coming.” The finely dressed man mused, rubbing his chin. He looked at his rings pensively. “You do realize that if you do this, our arrangement is at its end?”

“I do.”

“Very well. A shame, I’d thought we’d have more fun together.” He smirked as silver energy wafted from his body. The speaker on the other side hissed and then roared. Carnage erupted in front of him and the man smiled. As it came to a close, another mirror shimmered nearby, drawing his attention. As the figure took up his unimpressed stance in the mirror once more, the man in fine apparel smiled at him. “Maybe further down the line we can make a new deal. I have to go. Another client is calling. A pleasure, Fan-Boy.”

“Uchiha on the port bow!” Leo cried out.

“Hard to starboard, batten down the hatches, prepare the cannons!” Percy ordered.

“Would you please stop quoting Pirates of the Caribbean!?” Annabeth frowned. She huffed at his sheepish grin. “That’s the last time I let you pick the movie for date night.”

“You should totally watch the second and third ones. You’ll like the storyline.” Apollo advised.

“Don’t call me that, Khonsu.”

Khonsu waved his hand, ending the call, before accepting the next. He pursed his lips at the choppy image and gradually cleared away the interference with his magic. Faintly he could make out the caller’s masculine shape. Behind him was a sunrise and water? Figures, he always got such terrible service with international calls.

“Hello?”

“Khnsu?” Ah, the god smiled. He knew that voice. It was his favorite avatar-to-be. Khonsu let loose his mana so that the image came in clearly.

“Naruto!” He emoted a bright smile. “It’s been so long!”

“..Three days at most.” The boy grunted. Was it really only three days? Huh, mortal time, go figure.

“Isn’t he a god of time?” Leo frowned.

“He’s bad at keeping it. And fudges numbers.” Hermes groused.

The blond teen crossed his arms. “I don’t have time to chat. I’m cashing in my last favor.”

...What?! No, no, no! It was too soon! Khonsu frowned, racking his godly mind for a way to keep himself and the boy connected. He’d perhaps acted rashly, sending him to aid his (now formal) servant against that other being, but something told him those two were bound to meet eventually. He figured there’d be no harm in hastening it.

However, if he’d known the boy was going to use his last favor in literally the same week as he’d used the second, he’d have never let them meet in the first place! Actually, something about his wayward avatar-to-be was off. He looked him over for several milliseconds before he found it.

“Is that a bullet wound?!” Khonsu was familiar with mortals’ weaponry due to his priests’ and mages’ constant struggle against them. If his avatar-to-be had been injured by one…well, some mortal was in for a very bad night.

“That’s kind of scary.” Nico rubbed his chin. “You’re in for a bad night…”

“Save it for auditions, Nico.” Hazel smirked at him.

“Not important.” The silly boy scowled. Khonsu made to protest, maybe if he offered aid freely his favor would be kept— “I need you to age a demigod for me.”

Was that all? Oh, he’d turn them to bone free of charge!

“Let me see an image of the target.” He smiled, prepared to make use of the concept from Oscar Wilde’s famed short novel. Naruto lifted a finger and gestured to someone just past his line of vision. A girl, pretty thing she, stepped up beside him.

“This is Thalia.” Odd, that name sounded fam—No. No, he wasn’t really asking-?! “Yes. She’s that Thalia.”

...Dammit, Naruto!

“Even he sees how much of a bad idea it is,” Poseidon mused.

“Then he shouldn’t do it!” Zeus raged.

“He’s indebted to the mortal. He’s going to do it.” Hades drawled.

“A pleasure to finally meet you, my dear. I’ve heard so much about you. Such a shame our meeting must come over a call.” Khonsu charmed the mortal while he inwardly seethed.

“Charmed is stretching it.” Thalia huffed.

Destroying a monster of another Pantheon in defense of his avatar-to-be was an allotment granted every few centuries – and he’d stockpiled those for this very reason. He’d have willingly done it free of charge if not for the way it was phrased by the foolish boy, but what Naruto asked for now was tantamount to going against the Rule of Ra. That sort of interference with the Greeks and their fatalistic prophecies had to cost a favor.

Or two. Khonsu’s smile became more genuine. He was filled with pride of his genius as a clever thought settled in his mind.

“The more I hear his thought process, the more I remember how much I hate this god.” Hermes made an odd noise in the back of his throat. 

“I’d love to, really I would, my boy. But that is the bastard of Olympus’ king. No offense, darling.” He started investigating his nails and ignored the hushed grumbles of the girl. Mortals were always so sensitive about hard truths being thrown in their face. Once she quieted down he played his card. “Perhaps we can negotiate—?”

“I don’t have time to negotiate, Khonsu! This is my favor,” Naruto said curtly. Rude, but he was used to the boy’s mannerisms now. “Make her seventeen, that’s all we need.”

“Then I’m afraid I must refuse.” Khonsu shrugged. He looked at his nails, interest fleeting. “Business is a hard and cruel mistress, but—”

“You owe me.”

“Ballsy!” Ares chuckled and clapped his hands together. “Now that Egyptian is gonna make the mortal go splat!”

“Very thrilling, Ares.” Athena rolled her eyes.

“I beg your pardon?” Silver eyes glared at the blond. “You overstep yourself, boy. I owe you nothing.”

“While I was on your last favor,” the gall of this mortal brat, hissing and spitting his folly in his face. “Artemis had been kidnapped by the Titans.”

Just like that, the boy’s worth showed itself once more. A mortal raised by Olympus, trained by Asgard, and owned by Khonsu.

“Owned!?” Artemis snarled. “He is no pet!”

“Hoo, the images conjured by that idea.” Aphrodite tittered, manifesting a fan to cool herself with.

“Quiet, you. And you, brother!” Artemis glared at Apollo. “This is all your fault!”

“My fault!?” Apollo huffed. “We’ve gone over this a dozen times now, he’s mortal!”

“And fictional.” Reyna added flatly.

“Not entirely true.” Athena hummed. “These books give us glimpses into the grander multiverse. Their choice of a focus is odd, but then it’s better than seeing a world where the Titans still reign supreme or where Percy Jackson turned against Olympus.”

“Yeah, I vote we not see that.” Percy deadpanned as he felt various eyes fall on him. “We can keep following this Naruto thing as long as we don’t see that.”

He had his foot in every big pond imaginable. Information most would keep close to them would be shared through the mortal willingly. For, what harm could one mortal do?

That was why Khonsu considered losing him to be too costly.

And yet, losing Artemis, or the Greeks as a whole, while catastrophic to the balance of life, was not really his concern. He managed Time and Business. Not Life.

“Screw you, too, Sandy.” Ares sneered.

“Seventeen, you said?” He asked after pensive thought. He looked the scowling girl over. “It won’t give her much of a physical change. Maybe some growth here and there—”

“Seventeen.” Naruto cut in firmly. “Not a second older.”

Smart lad, he’d learned. Khonsu covered his smirk with his hand and met the boy’s eyes.

“I will do this…but I have a condition,” he raised a finger, stopping the predictable protest. “I will not only do this request of yours, but I will refund your favor for what was done to the now rust bucket. It will reform, as if never bothered.

“Well that’s considerate.” Hephaestus mused.

“Should’ve left it as dust.” Nico grumbled.

In turn, you will forgive any instance of my request to you made within the last week. Both instances shall be considered mutual investments, leaving both of us with a favor apiece once more. Do we have a deal?”

“Don’t do it, kid, he’s swindling you!” Hermes cried out.

“He didn’t listen last time, why would you think he could now?” Athena asked.

“I’m optimistic!”

“Whiskers–” Blasted girl, don’t ruin this for him! “–we don’t have to use the favor–”

“It’s as good as we’re gonna get under the time constraint, Thalia. It’s fine.” Naruto, ah, the noble fool he was, pulled through for him. Blue eyes met Khonsu’s gaze and the blond nodded. “I agree.”

Khonsu practically glowed at the words. His eyes gleamed and shone with the moon’s light.

“Then, by my will, I shall do this for you, my friend.” Sucker. 

“I knew it!”

Khonsu cackled inwardly as he snapped his fingers. The teens blinked and frowned. He rolled his eyes at their silent accusation. “I’m a deity of the moon, children. Once the first light of the night’s Waxing Crescent kisses her skin, Thalia Grace shall be seventeen again.”

“Bastard stole my poetry!” Apollo gaped. “First my rad look and now my domain?!”

“...Did you just say ‘rad’?” Hermes asked.

“The dick!” 

“Again?” They asked. He deadpanned at them.

“She was born in nineteen-eighties like you were, Naruto. You both should be nineteen. Our arrangement was to your benefit.” He glanced at the demigod, then back at his avatar-to-be. “Hers, not so much. Tree life is rather dull.”

“Humph.” Demeter frowned. “What would he know?”

“Trees, the root of all evil. As prophesied by the Ninja.” Hades drawled.

“...Thank you, Khonsu.”

“It was my pleasure, my young friend.” Khonsu smiled. The mirror’s ripple ended and the image left. He reclaimed his seat upon his throne and picked up a single die that rested on a plate beside him. The Egyptian God’s smile grew just a tad wider as he looked at the other half of the dice set his human pet carried. “My silly little avatar, I will never let you go.”

“Now that’s going to be a very bad time.” Apollo tugged at his collar.

“Time joke, for serious?” Hermes asked as Artemis tossed in a glare at the both of them.

“Rather than make poor jokes, can we discuss why he wants to use my son as his mortal avatar to better influence the world with time magic?” She asked, nearly frothing at the mouth.

“Like I said, Sis, a bad time.” 

Being a prisoner of war sucked, Annabeth Chase often reflected.

“...I’m going to hate this chapter for this part alone.” Percy determined with a scowl.

“I doubt it’ll be anything graphic, Seaweed Brain.” Annabeth reassured him with a peck on the cheek. “You’re sweet for caring, though.”

It was boring and the only meaningful conversations she had, arguably, was when Luke decided to show up. The last time he had was weeks ago. But that wasn’t his fault, like he said, it wasn’t his call to leave her literally hanging.

Oh, but with this horrid experience came knowledge. She’d definitely be sure to lay out some ground rules when the War started. The first she’d thought of was granting all Monsters on the Titan’s side one offer of amnesty and forgiveness if they met in conflict. No more and no less, and any refusal was to be met by immediate death. The second, that enemy demigods or other human prisoners wouldn’t be bound by iron shackles in a mountain’s cavern and watched by carnivorous monsters.

Like she was now.

Two steel daggers glared at the lone eye of the oversized monster guarding her. This was the sort of creature that gave the Cyclopes like Tyson such a bad rap. The vile thing that almost ate her best friend when she was young.

“Hehehe, once Mr. General says you not needed no more, Gump is gonna cook you in a pot!” 

“I’m not too bad at cooking. Pretty good at it actually. Why don’t you hand me a hammer to tenderize myself with?” Annabeth sneered at the cyclops.

“Clever, Annabeth.” Athena nodded. “Arm yourself.”

It squinted at her before snorting. Mucus adhered on her shoe.

Gross.

“Ew, ew ew ew.” Annabeth gagged at the words she just read.

“Not gonna trick me, dumb demigod! Gump is smarterest of the Cyclopes!”

“Evidently.” Annabeth grumbled, flicking her foot around to rid it of the monster’s dried snot to no avail.

“That’s just wrong.” Piper shivered in disgust.

The act loosened her sneaker, and she waited for the cyclops to make another round before she started pushing it down. Once it hung on her toes and the dim witted monster approached her, she made her move. With careful aim, she kicked her leg and her shoe flew up into Gump’s head, striking him hard in the dome. She cursed. 

She’d been aiming for his eye.

“Feisty little meal!” The cyclops chortled as it rubbed his head before he reached out and stroked her cheek with a finger. Annabeth recoiled and swallowed the bile that crept up the back of her throat when the monster’s repugnant breath filled her nose. He chuckled and licked his lips. “S’okay. Gump likes it when his meal fights back.”

“Then you’re gonna love me.”

“No, that’s Thalia’s job.” Jason smirked.

“Jason, you’re dead to me.” Thalia scowled.

“I will happily die if it means I shall have a niece and nephew!” Jason valiantly declared.

“Huh?”

A silver cowled teen dropped down from above them and stabbed something into the Cyclops’ eye. Gump let out an impressive Wilhelm scream as the clearly magical weapon made him dissolve into dust. The teen dropped, back facing her, 

“Percy?” Annabeth’s smile faltered as the teen turned to her. No. He was too tall.

“Hate it.” Percy scowled.

“Ooh, a shining Knight.”

“Aphrodite, please leave my son alone.” Poseidon sighed when the goddess tittered.

His hood fell as he darted up the hall to look for potential reinforcements. Definitely not her Seaweed Brained friend. This guy was too blond. His eyes were too blue, and while Percy would’ve approved of it, she wasn’t keen on blue eyes. The silver circlet was a bit much too and…Was that a-a moon knight shirt? 

Hold on. Blond? Check. Blue eyes? Check. Whisker marked cheeks and Moon Knight memorabilia? Check check. Annabeth blinked.

“N-Naruto?”

“Hey, Annabeth. Don’t move.” Her long lost friend tossed a few silver crescent shaped shuriken at her shackles and the chains gave way. Weird, she’d always thought that was just movie nonsense. Unless the trajectory and force applied were perfect—gravity! Right! Naruto grunted when he caught her and steadied her on her feet. He rested a hand on her shoulder, scanning her for injuries.

“You got big and… dyed your hair?” Naruto arched an eyebrow as he lifted her bangs and she blushed. Evidently, holding up the sky left its mark on her. He snorted. “I don’t say this often, but white’s not a good color for you.”

Annabeth hugged him. Tight.

“Mm.”

“I don’t get as jealous when you hug Tyson, Percy.” Annabeth said with a knowing smirk.

“Wh-That’s not the same!”

“Why? He was essentially a big brother. A dorky big brother.”

“...So he would be–?”

“No, you’d still probably be Uncle Dork.”

“Gosh darn it.” Percy pouted again.

“You’re here! Yu-You’re really here!”

No, wait she could feel a familiar burn in the rim of her eyes. Aw, no, c’mon, not now! Dammit, Annabeth! You can’t cry right now! You’re knees deep in enemy territory! Keep it in! Yes! It was working! Ha! Take that, you unbalanced, hormone-influenced chemical reactions!

“Conceal don’t feel~” Apollo softly started. 

“No.” Athena and Annabeth told him. 

“Killjoy runs in the family it seems!” 

“Yes, okay.” Naruto chuckled as he returned her hug before pushing her back and smiling at her. “I’m here. You’re here. We’re here.”

There was a beat before a muffled, if  humorous, horn variant of the mildly racist “Dixie” song came from somewhere nearby before a thunderous boom shook the mountain. Naruto looked up at the ceiling.

“Judging by the faint General Lee homage, Uncle Fred’s here, too.”

“Ah, the Chick Magnet’s second best base form.” Apollo grinned.

“That show was intolerable.” Artemis scowled.

“What are you talking about?! We got Daisy Duke out of it!”

“What?” Uncle Fred—he’s the son of Artemis. Annabeth gaped as she took an offered silver hunting knife—which was terribly well-balanced—and looked up at the ceiling before looking back at Naruto. “Th-that was A-Apollo?”

“Yeah, turns out kidnapping his favorite—and only—twin sister puts quite the knot in his toga.” Naruto grumbled. He pulled a crescent headed ax from his belt and nodded at the hallway. He continued, speaking lowly as they walked. “If not for the whole “only demigods can challenge immortals thing”, I’d be up there, too.”

What, but he—Right. Clear sighted mortal. He was adopted. Annabeth blinked a few times.

“Hey, if you’re adopted by a goddess, doesn’t that make you an honorary demigod?”

“We have textbooks on the subject.” Athena said, looking mildly irate. “And the only reason we have multiple is because we’ve revised it over twenty-seven times!” 

“It’s a complicated subject.” Zeus defended, scowling. “But no, this boy does not fall under such categories.”

“Better not let Odin find out he’s available then.” Hades mumbled.

“Do not speak his name!” Artemis hissed.

“...I sense some backstory here,” Thalia said, looking at her patron goddess.

“Later!”

“…It’s complicated.” He sighed and peered around a corner before he started walking down the hall. Annabeth jogged after him.

“But, if the gods allow the traditional law of man to influence their own society—”

“Annabeth,” Naruto sighed as he tossed a few crescent shuriken down a hallway. Several monsters dissolved so fast, she hadn’t time to determine what they were. “Do you think Zeus would ever do something to unintentionally risk his rule?”

“All the time.” Hera drawled.

“Our conversation is going to be very long.” Zeus growled.

“Well—”

“Ignoring Percy doesn’t count.”

“It should.”

“It doesn’t.” Zeus glared at Poseidon.

“How do you even know about that?” She asked, brows furrowing. Naruto smirked at her, but said nothing. Annabeth huffed. “You’re chattier than I remember.”

“I’m in a good mood.”

“He basically just got engaged.” Aphrodite tittered.

“He did not!” “That poor boy.” Artemis seethed while Hera shook her head. They glared at one another. “What did you say? How dare you!”

“Enough!” Zeus boomed. “Read, Annabeth Chase!”

He grunted back, ridding a Scythian dracanae of her slithery leg with a swing of his axe. She flew over him and dissolved into dust before her pole arm clattered on the floor. “C’mon, Grover’s waiting to get you back to the Yacht.”

“There’s a yacht?”

“It’s a long story. One we don’t have time for.”

Okay. That was fair.

“We’re going to meet up with the others, right?”

Naruto didn’t say anything, pressing forward and taking more monsters out with various silver throwing weaponry. The fact that he didn’t voice his answer told her everything.

“No.” Annabeth scowled. “No, Naruto, I’m a demigod, too!” 

“You’re malnourished, sleep deprived and emotionally vulnerable.” That sounded more like the boy Annabeth knew. He looked at her, and she took a wary step back. His pupils were thin as slits and his eyes flicked between red and blue. “You’re going to the yacht. I’m covering you. End of discussion.”

“...Jerk.” Percy huffed.

“He brought up a lot of good points.” Nico said with a shrug.

“The way he did it bothers me.”

“But the others-!”

“Have my Uncle Fred and my Mom on their side.” Naruto held an arm out and caught her when the mountain trembled. Annabeth glared at him and he scowled back. “Annie, use your head! Are you in any shape to help the others right now?”

“He’s got you there, Annabeth.” Hazel hummed.

“He didn’t have to point it out.” Annabeth grumbled.

“Didn’t have to point out my rolled ankle, either. Still did.” Thalia said dryly. “It’s just how he is, Annie.”

“Oh, you’re still paying attention to him?” Annabeth asked snidely.

“...I hate you.”

“…I hate you.”

“Wow, copying me, Annie? Very immature.”

“Shut up, Lieutenant.”

“Yeah? Get in line.” With that he turned back around and continued leading her to a concealed exit. Annabeth frowned and looked up at the ceiling as more thunder raged above them. She hoped everything was going well.

“Children,” a thick accent crooned. Annabeth stilled, her eyes dilating as she tightened the grip on her knife and looked behind her. Crawling along the wall, the Manticore approached them. A twisted smile on its cheshire-like face. “Just where is it do you think you’re off to?”

“Killing him was the most satisfying thing I’ve ever done in hindsight.” Percy smiled.

“You didn’t get the memo?” Naruto asked, stepping around in front of her. She’d have been offended if her mind weren’t in turmoil at the moment. He brandished his axe in one hand and a few throwing knives in the other. “There’s apples in the courtyard ripe for the picking. A hunter killed the dragon.” 

“Brat.” Hera huffed and eyed her latest stepdaughter. “Fitting.”

“Oh, help me pick a venue for them, Hera.” Aphrodite giggled.

“A dumpster fire will do.”

“I’ve worked with less, so that’s fine.” 

“What’s this? This delectable scent…could it be?” The Manticore’s full attention was on Naruto. “It is. Hello, mortal.”

“Hang the next left, then the third left down the hall. Take the second right. At the end of the hall, climb until you see the clouds.” Naruto whispered. Annabeth glanced at him and swallowed. Scarlet eyes were locked on the monster approaching them and his whisker-like markings looked…thicker. “Go. Now.”

“There is no escape from here, child! Your mortal friend will make a delicious snack to gorge myself upon while I hunt you!” The Manticore snarled at her, giving her pause at the easily backed up threat. It opened its mouth to say more, only for a roar to rip out and shake the cavern. A throwing knife was in its left shoulder.

“Annie, run!” Naruto barked at her before he charged toward the Manticore. Annabeth hesitated, stricken by fear of the monster who’d tormented her the most. A quill flew at her, but was knocked off course by a silver throwing knife. She blinked out of her stupor and met Naruto’s heated glare. “Run!”

“R-Right!” Annabeth turned and flew down the hall. She heard their conflict continue behind her.

“Your death will be painful, mortal!” The Manticore roared. Naruto’s response confused her.

“Tried that already. It got boring, so I stood up.” 

“Oh, ha ha ha.” Hades grumbled, looking unamused. 

“Lil Nephew showin’ his comic know-how! That’s a classic Mister Knight ref!” Apollo grinned.

“Who?” Piper asked.

“Oh, uh. He’s not a thing yet. Just wait until the ‘Marvel NOW!’ print comes out.” Apollo waved her off before he blinked. “Wait, how did he–...Ohh, he inspired it in this universe! I love it!”

She had to get the story out of Grover. First, she had to get to Grover.

“Get to the Gro-vah! GOOO!” Leo cried out with a thick Austrian accent.

“Ah, Jorgen Von Strangle, classic.” Percy smiled.

“...No, Percy that’s…Have you not seen Predator?!”

“What’s Predator?” Percy asked.

“...We need a high-def television and a HD-DVD player! STAT!” Leo shouted, pointing at Apollo. The Sun God nodded and started to rise, but sat back down when Lightning shot over his head.

“That can come later.” Zeus grunted. He seethed and stewed for a moment, before huffing a breath. Then he turned to Poseidon. “You haven’t shown your son Predator?”

“I was respecting his mother’s wishes.”

“What are you talking about, Dad?” Percy frowned.

“The R-Rating Rule.” Poseidon drawled.

“...Oh.” Percy slumped down in his seat. “That rule sucks.”