Chapter 166 (Patreon)

“Are you sure I shouldn’t get anyone to take a look?” Her husband asked, holding her hand in his as she lay on the bed.

Qianyue smiled and shook her head. “Nothing can be done. I can feel it. My time has come.”

Qianyue had felt close to death before, but it was nothing like when she woke up this morning. There was no particular illness that made her feel that way; she was just tired. Her heart was tired of pumping blood, her lungs tired of breathing air, her body tired of living.

She had told Shu Yang the truth, that she felt this would be her last day.

He had simply nodded, then went to make some tea, and then sat down by her side to keep her company.

‘He’s not taking it in.’ Qianyue thought with a sigh.

She could tell from his face, it was like an open book to her. He wasn’t sad, or upset, he was simply sitting there, suppressing it all. 

“Are the children still here?” Qianyue asked.

“They are still outside,” Shu Yang answered with a nod, “Do you want me to get them?”

“No,” Qianyue said, shaking her head. She had already met them one by one. Saying a final goodbye. Whatever they hadn’t told each other today had been said countless times over the past few years. The fact that she didn’t have long to live wasn’t exactly a secret.

“Husband,” Qinayue said, looking carefully at his face. The more she looked, the more she thought he might actually be in some sort of shock. He wasn’t acting like his usual self. 

Qianyue would have imagined that her husband would have put on a comforting smile for her, entertaining her with stories, making sure her final moments were filled with peace and happiness.

Only after she was gone would his mask crumble, and he would start to grieve.

But it seemed she had been mistaken.

Shu Yang just sat there with vacant eyes, looking lost. It was like he couldn’t take in that these were actually their final moments together.

‘What a silly boy. So many years, so many talks. Are you still so surprised to see me go?’

But when she thought about it a little more, she realized it made sense. Her husband had always acted like everything was under control. Eventually, everything would work out, no matter how bad it looked.

‘Perhaps, deep down, he thought he could even cheat death itself when the time came.’

Qianyue smiled slightly. That seemed like the husband she knew.

They had talked about her passing for many years now. Qianyue wanted to make sure her husband was prepared, and that he would suffer as little as possible when the time came.

Shu Yang had acted like he had come to terms with it, but now, it seemed things weren’t quite so simple.

“What’s wrong with him? He hasn’t even noticed me.”

Qianyue looked to the window, where a small black fox lay on the sill. 

‘Looks like Xiaorong heard the news as well.’

“Can you go get me some more tea?” Qianyue asked her husband.

“Of course,” Shu Yang answered, nodding. He rose to his feet, and walked out of the bedroom, never laying his eyes on Xiaorong.

It wasn’t as if he was blind. Xiaorong could hide very well, and not even her husband could spot her if she really wanted to hide. But the fact that she had made herself visible for Qianyue meant Shu Yang should sense something, not to mention the fact that Xiaorong was communicating with her divine sense.

Qianyue didn’t really understand how things like that worked, but she felt her husband would have noticed something under normal circumstances.

“He’s not himself,” Qianyue answered Xiaorong when they were alone. “It’s normal. He’s watching his wife die in front of him, after all. Don’t worry, he’ll return to normal eventually.”

Xiaorong jumped from the window down to the bed. She sniffed Qianyue’s hand lightly. “You really are dying.”

“I am,” Qianyue answered simply. She didn’t feel reluctant about that fact. It was a long time coming. She was tired.

“Does it hurt?” Xiaorong asked.

“No. Look at the bedside table,” Qianyue said, gesturing to the many medicines there. “My husband has made sure I don’t feel any discomfort.”

“That’s good,” Xiaorong answered. 

The two of them were quiet for a moment. Qianyue didn’t mind, she was used to these interactions with Xiaorong now. 

She usually enjoyed talking to her. Qianyue spent most of her time around her husband and children, so talking with Xiaorong was very different from what she was used to.

She was also a beast, so it was bound to be out of the ordinary.

“I feel sad,” Xiaorong finally said, resting her head over Qianyue’s abdomen.

Qianyue slowly raised her arm, feeling the weakness more clearly than ever, and placed it over Xiaorong’s back.

“I always thought you looked forward to my death,” Qianyue said with a light smile, recalling the first time the black fox had come to see her. 

“I changed my mind,” Xiaorong admitted.

Back then, Xiaorong had callously asked how long she had left to live, and when Qianyue answered that she would live for at least another twenty years, Xiaorong had said it would be better if she died sooner.

It was harsch, but Qianyue didn’t hold it against her. She knew why she said it. 

It was because Xiaorong had finally noticed what Qianyue herself had realized long ago, that her husband had a miraculous talent, and that she was holding him back.

Qianyue herself had a similar thought once, that she should step away, let her husband grow freely, meet more women, and have more children.

But she soon realized that she was wrong. She wasn’t holding him back. Their children weren't holding him back. He loved them. They were the reason he wanted to grow stronger, not the other way around.

She didn’t even know the extent of her husband's strange talent, why would she make some strange decision based on speculation? She just needed to stay by his side, and make him happy.

‘Unfortunately, I can’t stay by his side any longer.’

“He’s coming back,” Xiaorong said, looking toward the door. She rose to her feet again. “I’ll leave you two alone.”

Qianyue just nodded. Talking so much had drained her.

“Goodbye, Qianyue,” Xiaorong said, licking her hand. “If you see my parents wherever you’re going, let them smell your hand. They’ll take care of you until the rest of us join you.”

‘Xiaorong thinks there is an afterlife? That’s nice.’

Before Qianyue could muster an answer, the door opened, and Shu Yang stepped inside with a cup of tea. Xiaorong was nowhere to be seen.

“Do you want me to help you sit up?” Shu Yang asked.

‘He doesn’t realize I just sent him to get tea as an excuse?’ Qianyue thought, slightly amused. Her husband was usually sharper than this. 

‘It’s a little cute, though. To think I’d get the chance to see a new side to him after so long.’

“What do you think happens after you die?” Qianyue asked instead of answering.

Shu Yang seemed surprised by the question. He looked contemplative as he placed the tea on the bedside table again, and then took his seat next to the bed.

“Are you truly dying, Qianyue?” He asked.

For the first time since she told him she didn’t have many hours when they woke up, Qianyue saw sadness on her husband’s face.

She took his hand, mustering strength to gently caress it. 

“I am. You know I am,” Qianyue answered.

Tears started running down her husband’s cheeks, and Qianyue smiled gently.

She wasn’t happy about her husband’s grief, it was just that she knew he needed to feel these things.

He would probably feel guilty for some stupid reason if she passed while he was still in denial.

“I…” Shu Yang choked, not getting the words out.

“It’s okay,” Qianyue said, “You know I’m tired. I’m looking forward to a rest.”

“Right,” Her husband said, gently stroking his hand over her cheek, looking very reluctant.

“Do you remember the glade in the forest behind my father’s house?” Qianyue asked, not knowing where she had gotten the strength to form the words from.

“Of course I do,” Shu Yang answered, and a smile briefly visited his face at the memory.

“I just thought of it for some reason. I used to bring a meal for us to share, and we would sit there for hours. You would tell me these amazing stories of faraway lands. Places and people I could never have imagined,” Qianyue said. 

They had hidden from Qianyue’s father in the beginning of their relationship, before Qianyue got pregnant with Tianren, and they got married. That glade was their usual meeting place.

But after they got married, they didn’t have a reason to sneak around any longer, and they rarely went back there after that.

“I always knew you were extraordinary. Special. I felt lucky that you were so obsessed with me. I felt special that someone special had chosen me,” Qianyue continued reminiscing. “Even in this place, surrounded by practically living gods, you stand out as unique.”

Qianyue closed her eyes. “I don’t know what I’m saying. I’m a little muddled-headed. You’re just very good, husband. And I like you very, very much. I…”

She choked slightly and felt tears coming. 

She didn’t want to cry. She didn’t want her husband to worry. But she really felt sad that she wouldn’t see her beloved Shu Yang anymore.

“You’re not alone in thinking like that,” Shu Yang said, “Do you think I haven’t tried looking for another wife or two? I’m not such a good guy. It’s just that no one could compare to you, so what can I do? You’ve spoiled me.”

“Pfft,” Qianyue let out a soft laugh.

‘He’s joking with me now?’

She opened her eyes again, and met the eyes of the man she loved.

‘Yeah. This is fine.’

‘No. It’s perfect.’

‘I’m ready. I’ll have a rest.’

‘I’ve truly been blessed with a wonderful life.’

‘If I have to live through hell for a thousand lifetimes to experience this one once more, I’ll gladly accept it.’

“Thank you,” Qianyue mustered her final words.

It wasn’t a thank you for her extraordinary life. For the wealth and power. For the status. Those things never mattered much to her, and now they were completely meaningless.

It was a thank you for loving her. And for letting her love him.

‘I really hope a long rest awaits me.’

‘When I open my eyes again, I hope I can see my Shu Yang.’

‘I hope I see my children.’

‘I hope they have some wonderful stories to tell me.’

‘I hope we eat something delicious together.’

‘I hope we…’

With an image of her family gathered together in her mind, one resembling the many evenings they had spent together, the image of her ideal paradise, Ren Qianyue drew her last breath.