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Book 1 Feedback Thread (Patreon)

Published:
2026-04-17 22:48:13
Imported:
2026-04

Content

This thread is for leaving feedback on Book 1 as a whole. Was there anything you thought needed to be developed more? Dragged on too much, or moved by too quickly? Any scene, or types of scenes, you really enjoyed and would like to see more of? Your favorite part of the book? Please feel free to leave any important feedback you'd like. Thank you!

Comments

Chris Hodge

Nah man, it was excellent, good pacing, everything has relevance, believable power scaling, and it's fun as well as deep

hawc7

I’m not good at feedback but just wanted to say I enjoyed it!

Ragnoroth

Hey Author, really liking the direction of the story so far! One bit of feedback: the timeline is getting a little compressed lately. In just one month so many things happened. It’s a bit of a whirlwind! Personally, I’d love to see a bit more 'narrative breathing room' or even a small time skip so these major events have more weight. It makes the world feel more vast and the MC’s progression more grounded when there’s some logical travel or recovery time between the big fights. Keep up the great work! Like I think a whole semester should have passed letting Levi ease into everything. One chapter or two of slice of life then a few time skip lines really make a big difference.

Keith

Part of what I think adds to the timeline feeling compressed is the slight lack of build up? Beyond having downtime, perhaps drawing out introductions of key elements of conflict may be useful. My biggest example is the final chapters, where Levi finally gets faced by something beyond his capabilities. To me, the introduction of that conflict felt quite rushed, with only one moment (with Montague) ever alluding to it. I feel drawing out conflicts slightly more could alleviate that…?

Tyrex316

I love the story. I like that the character is OP. A lot of authors start with a character like that then try to tone it down. It’s refreshing to see an author not afraid of it. That revelation at the end was great. Can’t wait to see where that takes the story.