Items 41- 59, Annotated (Patreon)

Been sick, now me am busy catching up! 

Here's more of that old nerd list:

41) The average comic shop 

42) Roy Thomas's ego (EDIT: Just a start, let's just say I'm not a fan, also, see #48)

43) “Realistically” painted superhero comics (EDIT: They can look fine, although they're not really my idea of fun. And too many painted superhero comics need to be filled with narrative captions to let you know what the hell is going on. Big soaring images with little connective tissue isn't comics, and painted comics tend to fall into this category even more than the usual variety. They're just so "epic". And dreary, the "realism" showing wrinkles in the faces and costumes, losing cartoon exaggeration, much foreshortening, grounding things that look pretty dopey under the magnifying glass. Also -- obvious referencing of actors takes me right out of the comic I'm looking at, it's sore thumb theater for me to see celebrities "playing" characters in a comic. I always felt painted comics in general was a way to "elevate" and validate the superhero medium, which only needs good stories and art and readers who couldn't give a fig what others thought about their entertainment choices, not a movement to ape movies and video games, imho. Comics have their own charm, personality and power, which, again, imho, is often lost when portrayed "realistically". Some of the silliest attempts at adult seriousness in superhero comics have been the most supposedly "realistic", in both story and art. They beg more questions than they answer (or attempt to answer), opening cans of worms in regards to  "actual" reality, physics, social movements, culture, etc. Anyway, these notes are getting too long, it's all comics, everyone has their ideas and can enjoy what they enjoy.)

44) The one Chicago Con I attended.   

45) The one Wonder Con I attended. 

46) Almost any comic Brian Bolland does the cover for that isn’t an anthology.  (EDIT: Ha ha, and except World's Funnest. This is an exaggeration, but so many comics had a bait-and-switch going on the covers --  with him especially -- and so often the interior art was...not Bolland quality. Vertigo really abused the bit, if you ask me. Beautiful covers, for the most part (Tara McPherson! James Jean!), but it never sat right with me. It's like saying the interior artist was insufficient or something. Maybe I'm uptight, I never liked the designated hitter rule in baseball and I believe in dancing with the date that you showed up with (or sitting in the corner, awkwardly).  I was asked to do covers for Transmetropolitan once -- by Darick Robertson, and I told him I thought he should do them, because it's his book and why take a backseat for s stretch -- or lose three paychecks? Also, I wasn't a fan of the book, but that wasn't Darick's fault (I was super-flattered to be asked). Anyway, it's not a law that can't be broken or a big deal, but I like covers in the modern era  to be done by the artist on the comic, myself.)

47) The overly slick paper and garish coloring on the DC Archives series 

48) 95% of the DC Archive introductions, especially those done by Roy Thomas or Michael Uslan and his writing partner whose name I forget. Who needs a writing partner for an introduction? A crappy introduction writer, that's who. Often if not always self-serving, self-involved, dull, usually just a list of contents and plot rundowns (hello, spoilers, you idiots, we want to read the damned books if you don't mind) and trivia and nothing of any substance. Basically about as well-written and incisive as a pro-zine article (at best), used as an opportunity to brag about the writer's own accomplishments and involvement in comics,and if you  take a drink every time there's an exclamation point you'll be drunk by page one. And Archives pay $500 an intro! People should be made to work for their money.

49) Comic Book Artist’s apparent inability to find serious fault with any creator or comic. Everything's great!!! (Three exclamation marks means it's also classic!!!).

50) DC’s inability to properly sell it’s line of comics based on popular Cartoon Network characters (including the shows based on DC properties). Particularly lame in the face of Archie’s survival and Tokyopop’s cine-manga successes.  (EDIT: This has changed somewhat, especially recently, with YA initiatives, etc. Also, why the fuck do we have to have Tokyopop back in the fold, comics beat that cancer once already, why let it take another foothold?)

51) Almost every comic book character statue ever made. (EDIT: Says the guy who stares lovingly at almost every vinyl version of an Ultraman monster, so, your mileage certainly may vary on this one. But I don't really like statues of them supertypes for some reason, although I loved the little DHC comic strip character ones, I like maquettes for the most part (even though we sold or gave away almost all the WB animation statues we were sent, save the first Superman, which is in storage , and I have a very large and useless Donald Duck statue I spent too much money on back when Icould afford to do things like that). I think most statues emphasize the things I don't go for in superhero comics -- aggravated anatomy, angry faces, ridiculous female attributes, an overall aesthetic I don't like. Everyone's different. Obviously them things sell to the fans.)

52) The “Theakstonizing” process (EDIT: See previous post, #40)

53) Being unable to read most old comics because they’re too expensive to buy as back issues and too obscure to reprint. 

54) Most comic message board posts and posters (EDIT: See twitter, nowadays, but I don't go on Reddit or Dischord or wherever the steady arguing is these days)

55) People with a virulent need to prove to the world that EC Comics were not high art. I agree, okay? And I like them anyway. They’re entertaining. And you’ll never blunt their influence on cartooning. Find something else to beat up on, like the nuclear family or kittens.   

56) People who insist that the collapse of Marvel Comics would be beneficial to the industry. 

57) People who still refuse to read black and white comics. (EDIT: fortunately, it's been less of an issue due to things like manga and The Walking Dead, but still, people who read Calvin and Hobbes but can't penetrate a black and white comic book make my head spin)

58) Manga-bashing (EDIT: Also less of an issue, but still headache-inducing that there are still so many smoothed brains out there that only see comics as Marvel and DC, and manga as something other than just comics from another place )

59) Alex Toth’s ideas on what comics should be (EDIT: This was partly in regards to the hero-worship circles who never touch on how unimpressive most of Toth's comics are as reading experiences despite the brilliant art, as well as his strangely stunted and reductive ideas about the medium itself. In interviews, correspondence and throughout his career, he championed a stilted, adventure strip/ pulp-era/Douglas Fairbanks-style of masculine derring-do that was pretty damned juvenile and largely bland, imho, especially considering his vociferous opinions about superheroes -- and practically everything else)