Chapter 139: Huh, Hughes Has a Child? (Patreon)

It was dinnertime, and inside the Fairy Tail guild, the noise was deafening.

Hughes hid in a dark, unnoticed corner, his eyes shimmering with light as they swept across the guild.

Makarov and Gildarts sat at the bar, their faces flushed from drink, each holding a barrel as large as a person could comfortably carry and taking a few sips from time to time.

Hughes's gaze lingered on the two of them for only a moment before shifting elsewhere.

Those powerhouses were practically equipped with persecution detectors. If your gaze rested on them for more than three or four breaths, they'd sense it and trace your line of sight straight back to you.

'How did Hughes know?'

'Oh, that's how it always worked on TV...'

Makarov and Gildarts weren't Hughes's targets anyway. Those two were far too boring. Pranking them wasn't fun at all.

It definitely wasn't because they were strong enough to beat him to a pulp if they got angry...

The person Hughes wanted to prank was Laxus, but after scanning the guild once, he couldn't find even the slightest trace of that blond-haired guy.

Who knew? Maybe he was busy showing off his flashy motorcycle under some old man's apartment.

Sigh... Too bad for Laxus. He'd never get to experience one of yours truly, Hughes's personal pranks!

After sighing, Hughes narrowed his eyes and focused on the dozens of tables below the bar.

Erza was slowly savoring every bite of her strawberry cake. It must have been so delicious that halfway through, she unconsciously cupped her cheeks with both hands, her face filled with bliss.

Hughes: (´•灬•`)

He couldn't bring himself to do it. Poor Erza didn't get to eat strawberry cake very often, and Hughes simply couldn't bear to ruin her blissful moment.

...

He'd wait until she'd eaten a few more bites and was even more immersed in it before luring Gray and Natsu over...

His gaze shifted to the next table. The white-haired, red-haired, and blue-haired trio were happily playing around together. Hughes's expression immediately turned serious as he pulled out a Recording Magic Crystal to capture the scene.

Hmph. Tonight, when he got home, he'd broadcast this on the giant screen in the living room. Lisanna was already growing up too fast at such a young age. Mira still hadn't beaten her enough.

'Natsu, huh? Just wait a few years until Lucy joins the guild. Let's see how you'll keep playing dumb then!' (According to Mashima himself, Natsu actually understands everything. He knows he likes Lucy, but Lucy, the real protagonist, is genuinely so dense that she doesn't even know whether she likes Natsu.) His gaze dropped to another table.

Uh... Better skip this one.

Tch. Pervert. He's not even wearing pants.

Not wanting to pollute his eyes, Hughes hurriedly skipped over Gray and looked at the next table.

There, Macao and Wakaba were squeezed onto the same bench. Each held a barrel of alcohol in one hand while the two had their arms slung around each other's shoulders. They chatted enthusiastically, bursting into laughter from time to time.

Curious about what they were talking about, Hughes twitched his ear slightly and began eavesdropping.

"Hey, Wakaba, I heard Hughes got beaten into a pig's head by the Guild Master. Didn't you visit him at Granny Porlyusica's place? Come on, tell me."

Wakaba took a sip of alcohol before speaking with great conviction.

"Macao, you should've seen it. Hughes wasn't just beaten into a pig's head. There wasn't a single uninjured spot on his body."

"When we got there, he was swollen up like a fat Vulcan, lying face-down on the hospital bed, drooling all over the place. One eye was tilted to the left, the other to the right, and he was even missing several teeth."

Macao, who had only returned from a mission today after turning over a new leaf, was instantly stunned.

"That serious? What on earth did Hughes do to make the Guild Master beat him up that badly?"

Wakaba glanced around before scooting closer and lowering his voice.

"My guess is Hughes secretly went to settle the score with Cailin, and then... made the kind of mistake every man makes."

Hughes: Σ(っ°Д°;)っ

He could tolerate them exaggerating his condition. But now they were actually pinning that kind of charge on him?

Even wild speculation should have some basis, shouldn't it?

The more Hughes thought about it, the angrier he became.

With a flick of his index finger, a sesame-sized spark flew onto Wakaba's back.

...

Still whispering, Wakaba twitched his nose and frowned.

"Macao, do you smell something burning?"

"What smell? You're probably drunk and your sense of smell is acting up. Forget that. You were saying Cailin tested positive for pregnancy, and the baby is Hughes's?" Macao asked eagerly, completely engrossed in the gossip.

"Oh, that's just my guess. But I'd say it's ninety-eight percent certain!"

Hughes: ???

So in the Fairy Tail world, you could tell whether someone was pregnant after only two or three days?

The bizarre thought had only just crossed Hughes's mind before he immediately dismissed it.

Bullshit.

There was no way anyone could tell if someone was pregnant after only two or three days.

That bastard Wakaba was saying he'd been saddled with unexpected fatherhood!

Speechless, Hughes flicked with his index and middle fingers together.

A peanut-sized spark skimmed along the ground, instantly passed through every obstacle in its path, and landed on Wakaba's pants.

"Macao, are you really sure you don't smell something burning?"

"I don't know. My nose hasn't been feeling right lately, so I can't smell anything. Hey, Wakaba, forget about the burning smell. Keep telling me more about Hughes!" Macao was itching to hear more after being bombarded with one juicy revelation after another.

"Alright. Since you're this eager, I'll risk it for your sake.

"Actually, back on Hot Spring Street that night, I saw Hughes acting like a hooligan toward Cailin.

"You absolutely can't tell anyone about this. I took Cailin's hush money and promised to keep it a secret!"

As he spoke, Wakaba nervously looked around, clearly afraid someone might overhear.

Hughes: (ꐦºﾛº)≡!!

How could he possibly put up with this?

Even now, whenever the residents of Magnolia saw him, they still called him a pervert!

Furious, Hughes raised a finger and slashed it horizontally through the air.

Instantly, the two sparks clinging to Wakaba's clothes erupted into flames.

Fed by his clothes and the other flammable materials on him, the fire blazed fiercely.

"AAAH! Which bastard set me on fire?!"

Wakaba let out a wail like a vengeful ghost that made everyone's hearts skip a beat.

The noisy guild suddenly fell silent for a brief moment before erupting into even greater chaos and panic.

"Wakaba, I'll help you! Don't be afraid!"

Already drunk, Macao didn't even look before splashing the contents of his barrel onto Wakaba.

"FWOOOOSH!"

The flames instantly shot two or three meters into the air.

"Damn it, Macao! You splashed alcohol on me!" Wakaba howled furiously before immediately throwing himself onto the ground and rolling several times, finally stopping beneath Natsu's feet.

"Natsu! Quick! Hurry up and absorb the flames off me!"

"Hey, Wakaba! When it comes to dealing with fire, of course you should leave it to me, the Ice-Make Mage!"

Having finally found his pants, Gray smugly brushed back his hair while icy air surged from his free left hand.

The frigid cold continuously collided with the fuel-less flames, the two-remaining locked in a stalemate for three breaths.

Then the flames froze solid into a block of ice and crashed onto the floor with a sharp clang.

For a brief moment, the guild gained a new work of art: an artistic ice sculpture named Wakaba.

Natsu, who had been about to absorb the flames himself, ended up sucking in nothing but a mouthful of air. Furious, he immediately rammed his head straight into Gray's.