New Lyrics: "I Fought the Mouse (and the Mouse Won)" (Patreon)

Suggested by David Gerrold

Ran for governor and I won,

Tore up the state consti... tuition,

I hate the gays but I... love guns.

Started a feud that was... real dumb,

I fought the Mouse and the Mouse won,

I fought the Mouse and the Mouse won.

I used the power of government

To tell them they were done,

Now I wonder where my donors went,

I fought the Mouse and the Mouse won,

I fought the Mouse and the Mouse won.

Banning books and edu... cation,

If it doesn't fit my... vision,

I’ll / erase it in the name of... freedom.

Now no one comes here for va... cation,

Got some voter harass... ment troops,

Ratatouille spit in... my soup.

The whole woke mob I will erase,

That part is really fun,

But The Village is my only base,

I fought the Mouse and the Mouse won,

I fought the Mouse and the Mouse won.

Mickey’s mad, he’s gonna... retort,

He’ll stop adding to his... resort,

And / Send she-hulk to meet me... in court.

Don't help that everybody... hates me,

Or I laugh and gesture... strangely,

Even Goofy thinks I’m creepy.

I want some presidential powers,

Oppression’s really fun,

But now I’ll stand in line for hours

And hours and hours and hours and hours

And hours and hours and hours and hours...

I fought the Mouse and the Mouse won,

I fought the Mouse and the Mouse won

My career is over before it’s... begun,

The Pirates of the Cari... bbean

Dressed me up for their... auction...

(We want the fathead! We want the fathead!)

Guess I’ll have to work the Haunted... Mansion,

I fought the Mouse and the Mouse won,

I fought the Mouse and the Mouse won.

Music: "I Fought the Law" by Sonny Curtis