New Song: "The Four Trump Indictments" (Patreon)

Poor Donny. He seems so cranky. Heh heh heh.

In the first Trump indictment, the D.A. said that hePaid hush money to Stormy.

In the second Trump indictment, the A.G said that heRetained classified documentsAnd paid hush money to Stormy.

Still the second Trump indictment, the A.G. said that heHid those classified documentsRetained in his houseAnd paid hush money to Stormy.

Still the second Trump indictment, the A.G. said that heLied about the documentsHidden in his houseIn closets and a ballroomAnd paid hush money to Stormy.

Still the second Trump indictment, the A.G. said he plannedA Con.. spira... cy!Lied about the documentsHidden in his houseIn closets and a ballroomAnd paid hush money to Stormy.

In the third Trump indictment, the A.G. said that heTried to deny your vote, in aCon.. spira... cy!Lied about the documentsHidden in his houseIn closets and a ballroomAnd paid hush money to Stormy.

Still the third Trump indictment, the A.G. said that heTried to defraud the country,And deny your vote, in aCon.. spira... cy!Lied about the documentsHidden in his houseIn a spare bedroomAnd paid hush money to Stormy.

Still the third Trump indictment, the A.G. said that heTried to obstruct the vote count,To defraud the country,And deny your vote, in aCon.. spira... cy!Lied about the documentsHidden in his houseSomewhere in the garageSomething something gazpacho Stormy.

Still the third Trump indictment, the A.G. said that heSent a MAGA mobTo obstruct the vote count,To defraud the country,And deny your vote, in aCon.. spira... cy!Lied about the documentsHidden in his houseUnderneath the rugAnd paid hush money to Stormy.

In the fourth Trump indictment, the A.G. said that he -- y’know what? I’ve got Trump fatigue. Let's just take these at once.

Conspired to commit forgery,To create false documents,Filed those false documents,Impersonated a public officer,Solicited violationOf oath by a public officer,Under the Georgia RICO ActSent a MAGA mobTo obstruct the vote count,To defraud the country,And deny your vote, in aCon.. spira... cy!Lied about the documentsHidden in his frickin’Glorified country club,In a bathroom with chandeliers...

And paid hush money to Stormy.

Music: "The Twelve Days of Christmas" (English trad., based on the 1909 arrangement by Frederic Austin)

Based on an idea by Katherine Kit Kerr