Update + PSA (Patreon)

Haunting Dagger Fast Pass updated today! Go check it out if you’re in the rogue tier, let me know what you think! Dakota lore is TOUGH on the soul, but she deserves to be looked after, poor sweet girl 😭

Now. PSA.

Geez, I feel my heart rate going up just thinking about making this post.

BEFORE WE GET STARTED: What’s important is that y’all know I’m NOT going to be doing less comic updates, I’m not going on hiatus (for the time being?) and as long as you’re a member, I’m going to make sure I commit to my 4 page a week promise. Don’t panic.

But I do need to talk to y’all about some stuff. I’ve only mentioned it slightly in passing over the last few months, but my health this last year hasn’t been great. AFAIK currently, it’s nothing life threatening. But I have been advised that if I don’t work to get my stress levels down, I might have more complications in the future.

A lot of you have known me for a long time, and I’m so grateful for you all. A lot of you might not know me from the next guy, but for context, I was previously diagnosed with an autoimmune disorder that can exasperate my other symptoms during flare ups - which seem to more often be caused by stress and lack of rest. Brain fog, anxiety, depression, muscle pain and weight fluctuations (I gained and lost 30 lbs in the last year and a half, that’s drastic, even for me) are the usual culprits when I’m dealing with flare ups. Pain just became a part of my daily routine, but that’s not normal!! Rn, I’m worried about my blood pressure. My heart. You can see why I need to get the stress down lmao

You might be thinking, “Caez, it’s comics. How stressful can it be?” And you’re right! Kinda! It’s not the work that’s stressing me out - it’s the uncertainty of Patreon every time they implement some new payment system that messes with our pledges, the (self inflicted) poor time management I was working under, and the. Well. When I started making an actual living on here - THANKS TO YOU GUYS!! - I did so many mental backflips to convince myself that I wasn’t deserving of this much support.

And if I don’t deserve this support, I have to work extra hard to make sure I’ve earned it.

But that. Uh. Turned into “if you’re not suffering for it, you won’t be able to keep it”. (I also have OCD, you can imagine how THAT spiraled-)

I’m telling you guys this because I’m trying to slow down and be kinder to myself. I LOVE my work, but I also punish myself for it (procrastinating and working odd hours of the night/morning to make up for it, missing my family, missing my kid, missing my LIFE) and I can not allow myself to do that anymore. I joke around all the time that I haven’t played any games since last summer, but that’s actually sad. The last time I had a weekend off that wasn’t a sick day or family emergency was in November, and I made pages in advance for that!

My immediate goal is to have weekends off again. I need rest, I need time with my family, and I need the time to pursue hobbies outside of comics, outside of things I need to monetize. I’m surprised I haven’t been rendered useless by burnout yet, I’m glad I’m making these changes before it’s too late. That won’t change my weekend updating schedule, as long as I can adhere to my weekday work hours, and not be afraid to ask for extra help when I need it. My spouse is already making changes to help me with after school activities and obligations when I’m busy.

I tell you all this because you’re the only reason I’m even able to do this for my job. And I want to continue to do a good job! This is my dream come true!

And I know some of you are going to say “Caez, take the month off, we’ll still be here!” And I believe all 12 of you, but I can’t ever in good conscience deprive all 1,000+ of you from a month’s worth of updates nor would I expect to be paid for nothing! Comics will continue! I just need you all to know where I’m at rn and why I might be trying new things in the near future.

Honestly, if I can do this my way and not self sabotage halfway through, you shouldn’t see any change in the update schedule from now on and for as long as we stay above the 4-page monthly goal lmao

ALSO I made a new goal on my about me that says if we hit 20k a month, I’ll be able to afford more help to bring Lucky! back immediately LMAO It’s a high goal because I know what 4 pages a week does to me, even with a flatter! If I’m gonna start on another comic weekly, I’m gonna have to outsource more of that work to them or get an inker on board 😭

But that’s putting the cart before the horse lmao I’m just grateful to do what I do now, and I’m grateful for everyone who sticks around for these stories. Thank you for your patience, love, and encouragement. Don’t overwork yourselves!!