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Soochie may conceal it decently most of the time he has VERY low self-esteem. Men face a lot on pressures and Sooch doesn't meet most of the standards. He's short, has a baby face, is not athletic, and is not academically inclined. Feels that pressure to be a provider but feels like he's not growing into that role, and is therefore not enough. He has mixed feelings about the diagnosis because while it may explain why he struggled, it's another "shortcoming" to add to the list.

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theo

oh Casey indeed

oldmanbecca

Excuse me while I cry 😔

vuswhyx

“ tell me anyway” YES✅✅✅✅✅✅

Matthew

Oh, my heart

JellyBee

poor baby :(

SharkBoyKade

oh Casey for sure☹️☹️ MY BOY!!!

Sefriu

Howie is at a loss for words because Sooch means so much to him, and he doesn't want Sooch to feel that way anymore 🥺 Howie, your green flag is showing 💚

Ino

I'm in tears...

Krissy

😭😭😭

Imni-Noite

😢 I'm glad he feels safe enough to voice those concerns, and they are very relatable sadly.. well done putting these struggles into words! Hit home for me

Staer

My baby Scooch 😭

sEnPai pAo

poor baby I hope better days come where Soochie doesn’t feel that way 🥹🫶🏽

Amanda

Oh Casey. As someone who had a late ADHD diagnosis - and very much feels like their life is not amounting to much - everything he’s saying resonates so hard. I’m so glad he has Howie to listen and validate his feelings. Because in your head or not, that shit’s real.

Megan Pawlak Arts

I had to have this conversation with my husband. When we first were dating, he had this idea that because he was the man he had to “provide “. At the time I was making more money and I am simply better with money than he is. I don’t personally believe in gender roles, so I had to really explain to him that it didn’t matter which one of us made more, we were both in it togetherand we each provided something different. We are better together than a part and that’s what matters to me.

DragonRider

I'm glad Sooch is able to articulate his feelings and has someone who will listen to them 💜

Mr.J

Pretty accurate depiction of someone with adhd i gotta say that hits the nail on thr head.

MessusMinnow

It is so difficult to feel like you’ve fallen short and let yourself down. 💔

KaydenDoesStuff

This is beautifully said! ADHD is so debilitating, & it’s really hard to accept that an undiagnosed issue has been the reason you’ve struggled your whole life. Especially when you’ve worked so hard & gotten nothing positive out of it! 😭❤️

Mono

Sooch and I really share the same brain sometimes and it’s painful to see those feelings expressed outside of myself. I’m so glad Howie is there to help him through this and provide comfort

stinky

BIG HUGS BIG BIG HUGS

Gracie T.

Gosh, this is incredibly real. I question this like every other day sometimes. I rather happily live alone, but feel like I’m not “enough” even for myself because executive dysfunction is an absolutely bitch. It feels like outside of work every day I can’t get anything done, and I end up relying on others for help with trying to do house repairs and upgrades and stuff that I remember my mom doing on her own for the longest time. I can stand outside of that scope and acknowledge there’s nothing wrong with leaning on others and asking for help and doing things differently, but convincing myself of that is hard some days.

Eden Grey

I love them too much sometimes

Dani Z

Low self-esteem gang, rise up!!!!🙋🏼#IStandWithSooch Lol

Olitoady

Aw :( I feel the same and that hurt 😔, wanting to be equal sooo much when deep down you know you’ll never be. Gotta learn to accept that we are not all equal and we all are our strength and weakness :(

Ducky

This is so fucking real. I was diagnosed auadhd at 40 and like so much made sense, but at the same time it just felt like, so that means that I'll never be as good as other people, no matter how hard I try. I'll always fall short as a partner, as a parent, as a worker, as a member of society in general. Tbh I think Howie's reaction is perfect, too. Words aren't going to necessarily "fix it." Feeling safe in that close proximity to his partner...I hope he feels like he can breathe freely, if even for a moment

floppsymoppsy

I understand him DEEP IN MY SOUL. You feel like no matter all your efforts and struggles to get to where you are everyone is just going to see it as this one pill fix it solution. All the credit goes to the magic pill. It's irrational but so visceral.

Barbs

Where can i get a hug like that? Is there a wait list?

will

i start crying so much while i’m at work

Am

The rational brain saying "I know it's all in my head, I'm not trying to have a pity party" but it's still being drowned out by this worries 🥲 that's so real. I feel for him, and I wonder how Howie feels after hearing all of that...

HannaLuLu

Man Bittie, you love to make us feel stuff huh? Like 2 updates ago we were all cracking up and now I've got tears rolling down my cheeks. Love you, love them, love this story ❤️ 😭

Nicole Jones (edited)

Comment edits

2026-09-06 12:00 I took my ADHD diagnosis differently. It explained why I struggled so much. It showed me that I was struggling because my brain is different, not because I’m stupid. I felt justified. I hope Sooch can get to that realization too someday.
2025-10-04 14:29

Meirvae

Oh my god I love them so much. I’m physically disabled and recently got to a point where I need mobility aids and I feel what Sooch is saying so much. I feel so weak and incompetent and like I don’t bring value to anyone anymore. I’m so glad Sooch can talk honestly about this with Howie <3

Meirvae

I’m also neurodivergent so it’s just the icing on the cake 😅

Beren

Howie has officially yaoi hands…

lilbadlos 3

This is amazing writing and store development 🙌 👏 👌 please take ur time and make ur story more beautiful than it already is also im a bit teary eyed of this too 😢

RoseRiverWolf

I really wish I could articulate my feelings as well as Sooch... Also, for everyone of us (and those who empathize/sympathize ❤️) where the "it's all in my head and I KNOW it" bit resonates, yes, it is. But in your head is where you *live* and that's why it's so hard to ignore that thought.

doobs

No such thing as too much love for these guys

Ducky

Thank you 💗 I actually am crying reading this. And I know you're right. There are other things I excel at that other people I work with don't. It's not all bad either. It's nice to know that I wasn't just a "bad kid" or too hyper or too bull-headed. There was a reason. It does make part of me feel validated. I hope part of Sooch can feel validated some day, too

Shauna Ayers

So well expressed. And the complexity and realism of the facial expressions is so on point.

teri

All the hugs for Sooch :(

Insaner

Damn, this hit...way closer to home than I thought. My babies. On both sides. ❤️

ThatSillyOtaku

I'm in the same boat. I take Adderall and recently had to take my rollator to a ren faire. Just know you're not alone. 🙏🏾

Insaner

Cmere friend, it might be virtual but I hope you feel it all the same 🫂

Kumiko Misaki

toxic masculinity stereotypes hitting him hard 💔

A.R.Walker

You know what's crazy good to me about this comic that I don't feel with others? The softness never goes away. Even when they're mad, it's always there, and being married to someone for 11 years will tell you two things: 1. Even at your angriest, you still have a soft spot that gives away as soon as they look at you just the right way and 2. You're getting old because holy shit it's been 11 years 🫠

GR

Sooch, bestie, let me take you on a stroll down memory lane 🩷 specially chapters 7.25-7.29

Amelia Rector

Oh, Sooch. Those aren’t the only things you can bring to a relationship. It’s a partnership and there’s a reason why so many cultures have references to finding your partner is a completion. Two half’s to a soul or yin and yang…whatever culture you’re from you can find these believes that 2 people make the whole. Let Howie compensate for what you lack and you will compensate for what Howie lacks. You bring so much comedy and relief to Howie’s life. Sometimes that’s what your partner needs. Someone who is so kind and gentle. You’re a team, you don’t have to do it all. Just working together is all that matters. Showing up and being there is what Howie needs. ❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥🥰

PinkiePi

You he's serious and really thinking about what sooch is feeling, he even dropped the government name. I feel this sSOOOOOOOOOOO much. When I first got my ADHD diagnosis, I felt like a fraud and a failure. I felt like my husband would finally see what I truly am. That I'd be measured, found wanting, and thusly cast aside. But through therapy, voicing those concerns with people I could truly trust, and having them continue to support me I found my self confidence. You are not your diagnosis!!!! We are all frauds in some way making our path in life, why cant, NAY!, why *shouldn't* I get in on that con lol

Brukernavn

Samsies! I have felt like a useless idiot for so long, think it was just not me being able to cope like everyone else. But I didnt know that I was carrying like an extra 50kg on my back doing the same incline as "normal" people. I have started to give myself some slack and be more in tune with what I am able to do ♥️

Sarah

This really resonates with me. I have ADHD and wasn't diagnosed till after college. Even though I was a great student, I was struggling in secret, quiet ways. My self esteem suffered in ways I didn't recognize until I was in my 30s. I appeared confident, but I was compensating for feeling extremely defective. It sucks but getting the ADHD diagnosis helped an indescribable amount.

literarilyanerd

Married for 18yrs here. I can’t make eye contact when we’re mad at each other or I’ll immediately start laughing. It makes being mad and having an argument very difficult 😅 it makes getting over an argument a lot easier.

A.R.Walker

SAAAMME Like, stop smiling at me like that IM MAD AT YOU

Sagie

Good representation of men with ADHD, I think. Me (a girl) and my brother both have ADHD and have VERY different experiences. I found the diagnosis comforting, he sees it as a weakness. I think medication is a helpful tool, he thinks taking it is like giving up. I’m cool with it, he avoids the topic and is embarassed. The pressures put on men seem to make processing this kind of stuff especially difficult, and I really feel for them.

Haven

He really needs that embrace 🥺💓

emma

I went back to those pages and got very emotional 🥺 I can't wait for the next update for Howie to reassure him

Umbrathor

On behalf of all ablist culture, I apologize that we make you feel that way. Your worth is not in whether you need aids or prosthetics, but in how you use them - and all your other faculties and tools: your brain, heart, eyes and ears most of all.

simplysmitten

I want to wrap sooch up in a blanket and protect him from everything

Umbrathor

Any author's job is to make us Feel Things. The more they make you feel, the more often, and the deeper the feels, the better they are at their job. If they also bring you new insights, they are fucking brilliant.

Umbrathor

Howie's feels are probably predominant now. His breain will start pooping out some pearls of love and care and wisdom soon.

Kati de Jong

Very recognisable representation of adhd. I still struggle with needing meds. I just so badly want to be able to do it without :(

Romi

I hate that society influences people to think "it's all in my head" and that would mean it's worth less... Everything of the "reality" we see is also in our "heads". We are what's in our heads, so that should mean everything. I hope you get what I mean. It's beautiful Sooch can open up about his doubts, and I hope everyone finds their Howie to do so

GR

They really uplift each other 🩷

G

Man Sooch talking like this is so 🥺 first of all poor baby, i totally relate to his struggle as someone who got diagnosed with ADHD in my early 20s... A lot of wondering what could have been different if it was caught earlier. But also omg he's also talking so seriously about his and Howie's relationship... You can tell he's really in it for the long haul, talking about being a provider for Howie and everything... Its really sweet and such a symbol of the huge progression our boys have gone through in such a short few months (in their time anyways hehe)

Ashley Santos

I looooovvvvveeeee the fact that Howie is at a loss for words because honestly sometimes the root of people’s feelings aren’t something that can be changed with words of denial. Sometimes just a small reassurance that you’re there at the person’s side as they go through these insecurities is enough. I love these two so much 🥰🥰🥰❤️❤️❤️❤️.

peachy keen

I can understand sooch to an extent. It's hard to be masculine presenting or a man and be neurodivergent. Men are told they can't have any shortcomings because they *have* to be strong and provide for others. It's so nice to see him in this healthy relationship where he can discuss these insecurities and have Howie in his corner :')

peachy keen

Not that being neurodivergent is a shortcoming but it's seen like that by our society!!

Holden

As a person with ADHD I’ve totally felt that way and I hope Sooch has Howie and others around him in addition to therapy that will help squash those thoughts!

Scott Argo

Thanks for the ugly cry! 🥹😢😭

RevyBlack

He used his real name! That’s how touched and in his emotions he was😭😭😭❤️‍🩹

Riverstyxxxxx

Hey so currently sobbing ! 😭😭😭🥀🥀🥀🥀 the feeling of underperforming in so many aspect of life and the sense of dread from Sooch lawd this comic never misses with the angst ❤️❤️❤️🫶🏼🥹

Gracie Bou

This is sad and so relatable tbh. It’s something anyone with a disability goes through I think. The realization that sometimes trying just isn’t enough and that determination to grit your teeth and push forward isn’t enough. That there are some things you cannot do, or have to do differently. It gets easier as you get older and learn that life is a fight in which any weapon is up for grabs. Any tool that will help is worth taking.

Mica

I want to take this chance to compliment you on your amazing writing skills. I’ve been following this comic for a while now and I’m still struck by how beautifully these characters have developed and how gracefully you handle these nuanced themes of identity, self-esteem, and growth. Props to you, author! 🫶

Bj. Vali

😭😭😭😭😭😭

Natalie Taylor

Omg Sooch please! 😭 I can’t cry rn

DDonovan

It’s hard for neuro divergent in a world of neuro typical people. I feel for Sooch. I hope he realizes how strong he is to keep trying and working at the things that don’t come easy for him.

perpendorkulate

I’ve been reading this comic since 2018 and I’m 26 now. I really feel like I’ve grown up with this comic in a few ways and it becomes more and more relatable as I’ve gotten older. This past year, I was diagnosed with both PCOS and ADHD and all of the things Sooch feels have really reflected some of my own thoughts about myself; feeling like these diagnoses explain a lot but also represent some sort of failing that’s hard to define. It’s honestly so healing to see that I’m not the only one having these thoughts or problems. It’s also healing to see how much Howie sees in Sooch that Sooch can’t see in himself. It makes it easier to give myself a little of that same grace. Bittie, I love your writing so much. Not a word of a lie, I reread this comic at least twice a year from start to present and it hits the same every time. The slow build and the character development are both so satisfying and sweet and the payoff is exquisite, and the story has remained just as captivating and satisfying since they’ve gotten together. Anyways, just a love letter to Bittie! You’re amazing and however many accolades you receive, they are NOT ENOUGH 😭💕

Cynthia Smith (Dex)

That hit hard and way too close to home. I love how much growth and feel there is here.

Kittycat

This really hit close to home Such a beautiful emotional pages 🥰😢😭

Forester

Invisible disabilities are so much harder to accept that physical ones, and you are doing such a good job representing that with Sooch.

TheMidwestJess

It's so crappy when you KNOW your thoughts aren't true, that they're illogical, but it still doesn't stop them from FEELING true. I deal with that all the time and it's the bane of my existence. I feel you, Sooch.

FeyFlower004

I’m actively changing my major after coming to terms with the fact that the STEM degree I’ve been working towards isn’t right for me, and was never right for me. I was diagnosed with adhd at 17, right around the time I found this comic. Sooch’s struggles felt so viscerally real to me. But I was always good at school when I was younger, so when that stopped around 15, it hit me a lot harder than I expected it to. I’m 21 now, I’ve been on medication for 4 years and I’m finally studying something I enjoy and I know I’ll succeed in. Seeing Sooch finally get his “answer” and struggle with it is really hard now, as I’m through it and see the other side. But it’s also pretty special. Sure he’s fictional, but his impact on my own weirdly similar life wasn’t. I hope by the end of this comic he can feel as comfortable in his life and capabilities as I do now. And I hope you know Bittie how you helped so many of us feel seen with him

Procra

The struggles Sooch is facing are so real. Like, I would like that my friends and family read this comic just cause it explain it so well hehe.

riftancalypseswife

“It’s stupid, it’s all in my head.” “Tell me anyway.” AHHHHH 😭😭😭😭

snappyfixture

Every time he uses “Casey” instead of “Sooch” it tugs my heart. It’s always so passionate

ublep

It's the dropping names for me, when Howie says - Oh, Casey - I just imagine a sweet voice with such tenderness I could melt, bittie, you are amazing with dialogue ❤️‍🔥

mangalover

it`s important for sooch to realize his brain just runs differently and that`s ok