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Internet Comment Etiquette: "Things You're Doing Wrong" (Patreon)

Published:
2018-02-20 15:27:10
Imported:
2026-06

Content

In today's lesson, there's a lot of takes that I couldn't use because I kept cracking up at "microphone for my farts"

Files

Internet Comment Etiquette: "Things You're Doing Wrong"

In today's lesson, we learn why nobody wants to be wrong on the internet. Big ups to Maddox over at https://www.youtube.com/user/maddoxaom "Big Money Salvia Theme" by Hot Dad http://www.youtube.com/Dotflist Gentleman Erik Intro Pic by http://www.twitter.com/SentientPizzaB http://www.neongrizzly.com/commentiquette http://www.patreon.com/commentiquette http://www.twitter.com/commentiquette http://www.facebook.com/internetcommentetiquette

Comments

Flip a Chip

Erik, this isn't a joke. You're cleaning poop off your butt wrong. You need to get a bidet. If you have a hairy b-hole then you absolutely need one. Take it from me, a guy on the bear side of the spectrum. There's no more "wiping a magic marker" feeling. Every movement feels like a symphony. You just blast your ass with an invigorating stream of water (no homo) then dry it off. No muss, no fuss, no shit clinging to your butt pubes. What's stopping you? Fear of jokes from people calling into question your sexuality? You just deepthroated like 3 bananas. Think they're too expensive? Wrong! The ones you attach to your toilet are only about $30 on Amazon. They're not hard to install either. If you can make a robot son, you can screw a piece of plastic in under your toilet seat and connect a hose of water to a nozzle that'll nuzzle your prostate. And it comes with all sorts of features other than acting like a policeman in 60s Georgia. (I didn't mean to imply that the people that were getting blasted by fire hoses were pieces of shit.) For example, it makes a great drinking fountain, that those getting blasted by fire hoses in the 60s probably wouldn't been able to drink from... Shit... this analogy isn't going well. Better blast it away with the power of the bidet! ]3========#(__(___| That's a bidet rocket ship cleaning your butt.

@thiccrat_

okay, david, i get it. i use baby wipes personally, because its a lot easier and cheaper than installing a bidet in a rental. i wish i could think of anything at all interesting to write. ive been sick again, and that always makes me especially suicidal.

Flip a Chip

I never feel completely clean with baby wipes, but if they work for you that's great! Sorry to hear you're sick, and hope you don't let it get you too down. Dealing with illness is really hard, but if it means anything I'm pulling for you if only so I can have someone to engage with about butt hygiene with.

@thiccrat_

ive already visited message boards about this and about showering. in the end, the shower can provide the bidet and most people shower daily, so it works out fine. i try not to take any dumps unless i'm going to shower soon. nobody will ever be completely clean no matter what. it is what it is.

Vesa Koivunen

Remember to testwipe with your finger once you think you're done.

Jonas

Came here to praise the new episode, but now I'm more intrigued about David and his clean butt. I've learnt a lot today.

Flip a Chip

I can't recommend a bidet (or technically a washlet) enough. I've had one for years. The only downside is you feel like a caveman if you ever have to take a dump in public.

Jonathon Bost

Blast it away with the power of bidet.

sally cohen

You glorious bastard, you did it! Bravo

Adam Rasmussen

You mother fucker... I even knew the microphone joke was coming.. hahahahaha

Kathryn Marie the Anxious Bee

Thanks Erik! I laughed so loud I scared my cat right off the bookshelves which she's not supposed to be on in the first place.

Steve Jones

God damn, that was great!

Mikell

Upload the laugh takes for Patreon!

Ericson Wilkinson

There is a hose attachment kind that is super easy to install, even in a rental. I prefer the hose type bidet, better control. So much cleaner than wipes, and no clogging concerns. $30 on amazon, tops. Why are we talking about ass cleaning anyway? Did I miss that part of the video?

Zlatko Unger

Your episodes are gettin better and better. Don't let those bananas stop you from increasing the bar on the next one.

KopyKat

Wow, Erik! Great moves! Proud of you, keep it up!!

@thiccrat_

i bet many people don't even hose themselves properly once in a shower. i don't know why we're talking about this exactly; i think maybe david wants to have sex with erik and is laying the groundwork for a sudden visit.

Jose Lepistö

Aw man this shit was hilarious until that unfunny diarrhea-stain appeared in the video. No helping the fact that this episode is now crappy by association. I used to think that Maddox was the shit and and the original ultimate internet legend with the biggest balls in the universe. I've loved his stuff with passion since the 90's, but the recent mind-bending psycho bullshit with the 400M lolsuit suing other comics, patreon, irrelevant and innocent people and everyone else practically just for making jokes and having fun at his expense for not understanding satire anymore. Fuck Maddox for being a total pudding head and acting like nothing is going on. He and his insane restraining-order-having job-lynch-mob harasser cunt of a girlfriend should go and jump in a volcano. Thanks Erik for making the internet less-shitty by being a fucking genious but fuck that comedy equivalent of a poopnugget maddox hasbeen loser. Anyway cool video but fuck maddox. This channel is so fucking funny I shit myself eternally. Fuck that cunt maddox though. Fuck maddox.

LayLover

The montage at the end makes this one of my favorite episodes Keep up the good work big money salvia