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The Apothecary Diaries EP 5 (Patreon)

Published:
2026-06-20 16:00:26
Edited:
2026-07-02 08:47:08
Imported:
2026-06
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  • 673999487.mp4

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Liv

Oh yk I have so much to say for this topic but it will take a second to stew on my thoughts lol

Liv

I will preface 2 things about power and appearance and their caveats: 1. SA can happen to anyone, but simultaneously acknowledging smaller, femme presenting people are proportionally targeted 2. How you look isn’t necessarily a sole determinant of being target, again with the caveat that yes, being conventionally attractive and of a marketable body type can contribute to targeting from trafficking and other assholes and MaoMao knows firsthand how rampant this is and what they’re looking for in terms of selling people, but SA isn’t necessarily about attraction it’s all about power and the perpetrator wanting control. I will give the example of when a girl could be in sweatpants, sweatshirt, crocs, completely covered up, mask on, and yet still being catcalled and cornered bc she is identified as smaller, thus a woman, thus a target. I think it’s a dangerous, malicious perception that can lure people into both blaming a victim, and people into a false sense of security that assault can be prevented/controlled by how “pretty” or how much clothing they’re wearing; I am vehemently disgusted whenever someone asks that “what was she wearing” relying on concepts of purity culture and a sense of “deserving” a crime or that you can 100% guarantee safety through mode of dress, while it can be a factor in the decision making of creeps it certainly isn’t a catch all solution and perpetuates this moral high horse onto other women.

Jared Williams

I’m not a woman but I agree with your point a lot. I think in the first two seasons, as best as I remember, only one thing has truly made me uncomfortable when the show so heavily talks about hard topics that were so prevalent of the time. Your end discussion was very elegant and insightful, I enjoyed it.

Liv

Now imo, if someone dresses “uglier” or affect their way of looking to be less noticed in an unsafe environment I understand that it can sometimes help, and if anything more power to you if you feel safer and more comfortable that way. Personally, I have found liberation in my second point in the way of “oh it doesn’t matter how I dress, if they’re going to be criminal they were going to do it anyway” similarly to my view of other people essentially slut shaming a woman for her appearance—these people are gonna think and do what they want to anyways, I just have to live for myself. There are certain actions I can take that could help me like making sure I’m with people, my friends have my location, pepper spray and an awareness of my surroundings and the increased chances of being stalked on a street at night, but still the emphasis on “could.” Personally, I still want to be out at night by myself, I don’t want the fear of other people controlling how I live and being able to express myself as I please. I completely understand when the fear does take over 100% of the decision making and if that happens to someone i don’t blame them, I have the days where I’m so angry at the injustice and the fear, I have the moments where I judge myself and am scared of the repercussions. It is an ongoing battle in my mental state every time I put myself out there, the voice of judgmental, victim blaming people in my life that say you’re making yourself a target looking like that, you can’t wear that, you shouldn’t be so gaudy. My own journey with it has been tough, trying to undo this malicious thinking and years of shaming, of paralyzing fear dictating my ability to live. And it has become close to MaoMao’s feelings about it: of course I’m angry, I get beyond furious, boiling mad, but this is a reality, and I choose to keep living how I want in spite of that. It’s become an engrained factor, and it’s a good day if I’m only thinking 20% about it and it is exhausting having to live with that ongoing fear. The emphasis ofc is always, if this is how you want to live—I hate that we live in a world where women watch what they wear and how they present, we shouldn’t have to overanalyze how we come across or how we might be in danger at any second, but the reality is bleak so if people want to dress/present in either direction I think that’s totally up to them and just want people to allow themselves to be their truest selves. I remain pragmatic, knowing certain ways of being and actions to help increase chances of protecting myself and other femme presenting people around me, but I try to not let it define me and suck the joy out of my life.

tamkan

the original light novel author, Natsu Hyuga, is a female. and there are two different manga adaptations of the story which are also female authors.

Otto

I forgot a lot about the first season episodes, it's so fun to rewatch them here =D