Tohka’s Dream House, Part 1 (Furniture TF, Date A Live) (Patreon)

Squeezing her butt into her pajama bottoms, Tohka settled into bed with a sigh of exhaustion.

Lying back, she rubbed her head into the pillow, closed her eyes, and tried to sleep, but it was difficult to drift off with her creaky old bed protesting every minor movement. And when she finally got comfy, the events of the day rose from her mind like bubbles from a bog and refused to let her ignore them:

As far as her days went, it hadn’t been anything too spectacular. They hadn’t fought any Spirits or Wizards from DEM Industries. And they hadn’t been kidnapped by crazy witches or had their memories sealed by the moon bunny or anything silly like that either. In fact, only one thing of particular note had happened, and she couldn’t tell why it stuck in her mind at all, because it wasn’t anything special, really.

This morning, Shido had found a strange box in his room. A fancy, gilded box with a snake motif, which he claimed had been there when he’d woken up. It seemed like an obvious trap, but there were no other signs of new Spirits around, and when opened, it contained nothing anyway. He’d shown it to her at school, just to prove as much, and no matter how closely she looked inside, she couldn’t find anything. As far as she could tell, it was just another empty jewellery box. 

So why did it refuse to let her forget it? 

Screwing her eyes as tightly shut as possible, she pushed the image of it out of her head. It was just a stupid box – why was she so obsessed with it anyway? There were much better things to think about in bed… like how fun it would be to have Shido in here with her… 

The image filled her head; she giggled in delight. There, that had definitely pushed the stupid box out of her mind. Oh, Shido…! Don’t be shy…! Ten seconds later she was snoring like a chainsaw. 

Is it a dream, a reality, or an illusion? Here, dreams come true – it only costs your self. Let’s meet today’s guest with a wish. 

In the dream, it wasn’t Shido in her bed with her, however. As she leaned over for the passionate kiss, she opened her eyes and gasped to find herself staring at a blindfolded young woman. 

With a squeal, she jerked upright. “Wh-who are you…?” 

The young woman remained where she lay, smirking. Unlike Tohka, she wasn’t wearing her sexiest pair of lingerie but a fancy dress with a short, spiky skirt and a tiny top hat – she looked like some kind of performer. 

“Oh hoh! Are you awake, Miss Yatogami! Welcome! You’re tonight’s special guest!”

She stared at her, blinking. “Sp-special guest? What are you talking about? Where is this? What’s going on? Who are you?” 

The woman in the blindfold simply smiled a little. “My name is Ren,” she said, offering Tohka a hand to shake. “And I’ve invited you here tonight to offer the first of three incredible wishes.” 

She stared at her. “Wishes? Like a genie?” 

“Something like that,” said Ren. “No matter what you desire, I can produce it! Endless wealth! True love! World conquest! Anything you want can be yours – all you have to do is ask for it.” 

“H-how do I know this isn’t a trick?” said Tohka.

“Well, I suppose you don’t,” said Ren. “ But what possible harm could there be in asking for something?” 

“I suppose that’s true,” said Tohka, though she didn’t really believe it. It just seemed too good to be true. Ren was clearly a Spirit, and she knew from her own experience that Spirits weren’t particularly trustworthy. At least not until Shido had shown them how good it felt to fall in love with him, anyway… She bit her lip. 

What could a wish-granting Spirit gain from granting wishes though? Assuming she was telling the truth about that anyway? 

Reading her expression, Ren smiled and took her hands in her own. “Of course, if you’re afraid to spill your deepest desires on our first wonderful little night together, you can always ask for something small as a test. Your remaining two wishes should be more than enough for the rest of your needs, shouldn’t they?

Tohka blushed. She only had one wish, really, and she was 90% of the way there already. Two wishes would be more than enough. 

After a moment, she nodded. Ren was right. Why not ask for something small as a test? The only question was, what to ask for? She chewed her lip, working her jaw in thought. Something truly small, like a new dress? Or should she at least try to get something she really wanted? 

An idea occurred to her.

Ren must have seen it in her eyes, because she smiled even harder. “It looks like you’ve thought of something.” 

Tohka took a deep breath. “I wish… I wish that… that me and Shido and all the other Spirits he’s sealed lived in a nicer house. N-nothing too big or fancy – I don’t want to live in a mansion or anything like that. Just… just something better than the one we live in now. With nicer furniture and beds that don’t creak. And stuff like that.” She trailed off lamely.

Ren, however, continued to smile. “A fancy house for you and Shido and all the other friendly Spirits to live in. What an adorable first wish. Well, if that’s what you desire, I shall work to make it happen, of course.” She brought her hands together in a clap, and as they met, the dream seemed to ripple – it reminded Tohka of a spacequake, but just as soon as it had begun it was over. 

She looked around. “I-is that it?” 

Placing a hand on Tohka’s shoulder, Ren pushed her back down to the pillow. The last thing Tohka saw before she drifted into dreamless sleep was the Spirit’s beaming smile.

“When you awaken from this dream, you’ll find your ideal world before you.” 

***

Tohka struck the bedroom and awoke with a gasp. Rolling around, she scrambled for purchase for several long seconds before she remembered to open her eyes and see where she was. 

Birdsong tickled her ears; sunlight poured through the open window. Was it morning already? But how? She felt like she’d only just fallen asleep. 

And more importantly, why the heck was she on the floor? 

Struggling to her feet, she found the answer pretty easily: the bed was gone. Completely gone, as if it were the one who’d been snatched away by a crazy witch in its sleep. There wasn’t even a futon – had she just been sleeping on the floor? 

Inspecting her room, she noticed several other, slightly less dramatic, changes. Had the room been recarpeted? And the walls: the wallpaper looked new too. Even the curtains seemed to have been replaced by a fresher pair, and when she grabbed them they felt soft and smooth, as if whoever had bought them had gone for the most luxurious fabric possible. 

“What the heck is going on?!” Had someone snuck in and secretly renovated their home overnight? But how? And why? And why would they take her bed with them if–?

The events of last night’s dream came back to her in a flash. Ren…! Her wish…! No. No, it couldn’t actually have come true, could it? But then, far stranger things had happened to her. Mind control. Transformation. Time travel. A wish-granting Spirit wasn’t too crazy, at least not compared to them. Thank Shido she’d wished for something small and not global conquest – who knew what the ramifications of such a big wish would have been?

She still didn’t understand why the bed was missing though. 

Leaving her bedroom behind, she headed downstairs to the kitchen, wondering if any of the other Spirits were up yet. On the way she couldn’t help but notice all the tiny little improvements her wish had made: the stairs no longer creaked, the banister no longer rattled, and the kitchen door didn’t jam when she tried to open it. 

When she stepped through, however, something immediately struck her as out of place. Everything looked so new and so fancy…

…But where was the kitchen sink? 

There was no sign of it, just a big gap in the counter, empty pipes aimed into the air, as if a thief had snuck in in the night and torn it out. She backed away, squinting. What kind of weird genie couldn’t conjure a new sink for her? Or was it just some weird limit of the wish? Would it only appear later? Ugh, she wished she’d asked more questions, but it was so hard to think rationally when you were in the middle of a dream. She hadn’t exactly been fully awake! 

For lack of anything better to do, she grabbed some cereal and some milk from the fridge and sat down at the table to eat and wait for the other Spirits to show up. 

Fortunately, it wasn’t long before they did. One by one, they trundled down the stairs into the kitchen, and Tohka watched them, waiting to see if they’d notice anything was up.  

Kotori was first up. Yawning, she stumbled towards the fridge and grabbed a bottle of orange juice. “Morning, Tohka.”

“Good morning, Kotori.” 

Next came Yoshino and Yoshinon. “Something’s strange today!” said the puppet, looking around suspiciously. “I can feel it!” 

“Like what?” asked Tohka. 

“I dunno…” said the rabbit. “I just can’t put my paw on it!” 

Soon the kitchen was crammed with Spirits, all looking for a nice, nutritious meal to start the day with. “Hey!” said Natsumi. “Didn’t we used to have more chairs than this?” 

“Just sit on the couch,” said Kaguya. 

With a ‘humphf!’, Natsumi and her bowl of cereal disappeared into the living room. Only to immediately reappear, looking flustered. “The couch is gone!” 

“Huh?” As one, every Spirit save Tohka looked up. She tried not to look too guilty. 

“How can the couch be gone?” said Kotori. “You didn’t just turn it into a toy or something, did you?” 

“Of course not!” 

“Well it can’t have just gotten up and walked on its own!” 

“Someone must have stolen it!” cried Miku. 

“Muku doesn’t think that would be very easy,” said Mukuro, looking unconvinced.

“Hey! The sink’s gone as well!” cried Nia. “What kind of thief steals a sofa and a sink?!” 

Tohka chewed her lip, sweating so hard she looked like she was melting. What should she do? Should she confess? It was the right thing to do, wasn’t it? On the other hand, what if they called her stupid for using one of her wishes in such a dumb way? Or for making a wish in the first place? 

She held her tongue. 

At last, Shido stumbled down the stairs in his dressing gown and slumped against the doorframe, rubbing his eyes. “What’s everybody shouting about?” he asked. 

“Shido! Shido!” cried Kotori, rushing over to him. “Someone’s stolen the couch! And the sink!” 

“Huh…?” He rubbed his eyes again and squinted. People really seemed to have a hard time noticing something as big as a missing sink, Tohka noted. “Huh. You know, now that I think about it, Ratatoskr was thinking about upgrading our lodgings.” 

“Oh yeah…” said Kotori, rubbing her chin. “I guess we did discuss that, didn’t we? I think. I guess that maybe they sent the renovators in the night or something. I don’t remember authorizing it, but it’s not like anyone would actually steal a couch, is it?”

Kaguya frowned. “I guess that makes sense.” 

Origami didn’t look as convinced. “That still doesn’t seem very logical to me.” 

“It’s so creepy!” said Miku, hugging herself.

Fortunately for Tohka, no-one decided to question it any further, so she was free to sit back and enjoy her cereal in peace. 

She just hoped her wish didn’t have any other weird side-effects.

*

One by one, the other Spirits finished their breakfasts and returned upstairs to dress for school. Natsumi, standing in the corner of the kitchen with a bowl of cornflakes in her hands, sighed in relief as she watched the last of them go. Finally. Now she could actually sit down. She hated having to eat standing up. 

Placing her bowl on the table, she went to grab one of the chairs. As she reached for it, however, a strange feeling passed through her. They’d definitely had more chairs than this, hadn’t they? 

Stepping back, she walked around the table, measuring things. They had – she was certain of it. The missing chair would have been sitting right here. 

Stepping into the spot herself, she frowned. Why would Ratatoskr’s renovators have taken one of their chairs? It seemed like such a strange half-measure. Why one and not all or them or none? 

She folded her arms and clicked her teeth in annoyance. For some reason, she just couldn’t get over the fact. It was so stupid! Take them all if you’re going to take one! Ugh! She could practically put the missing chair still here in its spot. In fact, she could see it so clearly it kinda hurt her a little. There. Right there. Perfect.

Rubbing her temple, Natsumi bent her legs, taking an instinctive seat on a chair that wasn’t there. A second in, she realized her mistake: squealing, she grabbed the table, trying to hold her up, but to her surprise, she didn’t need to. Despite her lack of support, she remained floating in the air, as if the chair were there but simply invisible. 

“Wh-what…?” Baffled, she tried to stand again, and found she couldn’t. Her legs were locked in a sitting pose, like all her muscles had turned to stone. “H-hey! What’s happening?! H-hey!” 

As she drew in the breath to scream for help, her lips snapped tightly shut and refused to open, as locked as her legs. Her arms did something very similar as well, snapping outward at fixed angles, as if she were resting them on a pair of invisible armrests. Her fingers flexed and balled themselves into fists. She tried to scream, but she was completely incapable. 

Sitting there, barely able to breathe, let alone make a sound, Natsumi watched through trembling eyes as her skin crackled and turned a hard, smooth brown, polished and whorled – it felt strangely pleasant. 

Nnn~! If Natsumi had still had the freedom to move her head, she would have snapped it back, gasping. Wh-what’s happening to me?! What’s going on?! 

As her skin hardened, her pajamas did the opposite: like hot wax they ran, dribbling and oozing and finally flowing outright across her body to pool in her lap as a thick green square. Her nipples and set, exposed, tingled as the cool air caressed them. Nnn~! St-stop! Come back! Come back! 

Her buttocks, fully bare for the world to see too, tingled and twitched and, even more bizarrely: sprouted a pair of stubby lumps. These stretched down to the floor to better support her floating body, and she could feel them as if they were a natural part of her form. Nnnnn~! 

Down below, her feet shivered and compacted, crushed into a pair of simple cuboid supports, while higher up, her thighs fused together and thinned, merging into a simple seat, on which her molten clothes swiftly plumped themselves into a cushion.

Her hands, not to be outdone, tightened, tightened, balled so hard it hurt, and finally twisted themselves into a pair of decorative curls. As she struggled to scream, the wave of dendrification finally washed over her face outright, turning its already frozen features into a mask of silent pleasure. Nnn~! St-st-stop! 

Now a vice seized her head and squeezed it, squeezed it tight, crushing it first into a cube and then into a wide, thin cuboid with her facial features smeared thin across it, hidden in the grain. 

Gaps appeared in her torso, tiny gaps, which soon stretched into tall, vertical holes. By the time they stopped, her torso was gone, replaced by a row of thin wooden supports…

…just like all the other chairs at the table. 

As the last of the changes’ tingles faded away, Natsumi stared at her altered form in horrified realization. Wh-what had happened to her?! What the heck was going on?! She was the one who was supposed to transform people! 

She squirmed, but it didn’t make a difference – she couldn’t move at all. All she could do was scream in her head, scream and hope one of the others would take notice. Heeeeelp! Heeeeeelp!