Fam (Patreon)

Last weekend I went back to Buffalo, NY for the funeral of my grandmother (I’m fine). It was sad, but I was most nervous about seeing my extended family all in one place. My grandmother was a matriarch. She was a mother of seven kids and nineteen grandkids, of which I’m the oldest. I have an excessive amount of fond memories from my youth and growing up with this side of the family. I adored most of my cousins, aunts, and uncles and loved the holiday get-togethers. The thing is, I’ve been gone for nearly twenty years. Now, I’ve seen a lot of them here and there on my trips back, but never quite like the gatherings in the past. When I moved out of Buffalo some of my youngest cousins were yet to be born. I’d met them, but at young ages and without the sort of bonding that occurred with my older relatives. I wondered if they’d remember me at all.

Turns out, my worry was mostly for nothing. Getting to see all of the family again was an overwhelming, but positive experience. I reconnected with a lot of my cousins. I was able to organize past hints of what they’ve been up to and make them into complete stories. I met their kids, often for the first time in person. It was great. We celebrated the last time my grandmother would ever bring us together and it was like the holiday memories of old.

As for my youngest cousins: One is seventeen and the other is nineteen. I wasn’t sure we would connect. The second night I was in town most of the family met at my uncle’s house for food and memories. My brother and I got there early and they met me at the door. Before I could even get hellos out of the way, one of them said,

“Holy shit, nice Pistons pin!”

I forgot that basketball is the sport of the house.

What followed was constant basketball talk interspersed with jokes, world opinions, and memories. It was very easy to talk to them and it was awesome to see them grown up. The younger one plays high school ball and was just back from a knee injury. He scored six threes the day before I came back to San Diego. I left him my pin.

Moving cross country next year is making me a little nervous, but I’m happy to know that the family is still there.      

-Ian