Revelation - Chapter 33 (Patreon)

Iris

I jolt awake, throwing the blankets off of me and sprinting to the nearest trash can releasing the contents of my stomach. I don’t know how long I stay over the trash vomiting until I’m dry heaving. I sit back on my knees, wiping my forehead. My hair is stuck to it from all the sweat that has perspired on me.

I hastily wipe my mouth, holding my temples trying to staunch the headache. It’s throbbing. Constantly. Like a faint drum is pounding in my ears. It won’t go away.

A light sob escapes me. It’s been like this for weeks now. I have nightmares that keep me up.

How could I have done such a thing? I killed Remus. I killed him. And I can’t live with that guilt.

~

“Iris!” I look up from my bowl of porridge to see Braith coming towards me. I plaster on the best smile that I can, but I know he sees right through me. Braith is like Remus in so many ways. And he has shown me his true colors in the past weeks. It frightens me because with Remus he had gained affection for me and even learned to actually love, but I can’t even get a proper read on Braith.

He’s always watching me silently. Calculating.

He sits in front of me, his smile dropping.

“Are you alright?” He asks. He reaches out placing his hand against my forehead but I flinch away.

“I’m fine. Just another nightmare.” I murmur. He lets out a breath.

“Iris. Why can’t you just accept that what you did is a good thing?” He asks. I shrug keeping my gaze focused on the bowl I can’t even bring to my lips. It makes me sick.

“I betrayed him. I don’t care how cruel he was… he didn’t deserve to die like that. Not by me.” I look up at Braith.

“He wouldn’t even fight back. He wouldn’t defend himself. He died, under the rubble and remains of his childhood home.” I say. Braith just frowns. I know he gets angry when I speak like this, but he doesn’t let it show. The energy that runs through me is wild. Each time I get emotional, I kill something on accident.

“It’s his own fault if he wouldn’t fight back Iris. He deserved everything he got. And now, he’s gone.” Silence stretches out over us.

“Maybe we should up your training.” He says. I look at him in confusion.

“What would that help?” I ask.

“It would give you less to think about, and by the time we finish you’ll be too exhausted to dream.” He says. I don’t respond. Training. All the time it’s all he ever thinks about. I know he has a hidden agenda to it, but he won’t tell me. Not until it’s too late.

“Braith. I need to learn how to control this first. If I get too upset, I could hurt people.” I say. He looks over into the trees beyond us and seems to be contemplating his next words. He looks me in the eyes and his black gaze makes me shift uncomfortably.

“Iris This isn’t up for discussion.” He says. He doesn’t wait for me to respond. Only walks away.

The drumming grows in my head, and I rub my temples trying to stop it.

“Ah!” I cry out in pain as I’m knocked off my feet and onto my back from the force of Braith’s attack.

“Again! You’re not focused enough!” He shouts. I sit up quickly getting to my feet. I know what will happen If I don’t get back up fast enough. Braith cries out as he throws another force of energy at me.

I try and absorb it, but it only backfires, sending me flying. I lay on the ground in pain, looking up at the sky. Everything makes me feel dizzy. The roots beneath me are tingling and I know what he’s doing. The ground jolts me and I arch my back screaming in pain.

Braith doesn’t hold back.

I lay there for a moment after he finally stops, and I can hear his footsteps.

“Do you not take this seriously?” He shouts. “Is this some kind of game to you?”

I hold my hand up, rolling over as I groan in pain.

“I’m sorry, I’m just tired..” I murmur.

“Tired? We’re all tired, Iris! Don’t you think we were tired when we were serving those entitled bastards, while you had the luxury of warming his bed?” He shouts. I look up at him, hurt crossing my features. He has such rage on his face and I have no idea where it’s coming from. But it’s been getting worse lately.

He realizes what it is he said and steps back.

“I’m sorry. I just get frustrated sometimes.” He says. I sit up, looking away from him.

“Iris… please.” He says. I pull my knees to my chest trying to drown him out but I can’t. I can’t do anything.

“You killed them.” I murmur. He doesn’t respond.

“You killed my only friends.”

“What?” He asks. Tears well up in my eyes.

“Sky. Ezra. You killed them.” I say. “Sky was a human, just like me. She was innocent, and she had no power. And you killed her.” He takes a deep breath and I can tell he’s getting frustrated. But he has never once apologized or acknowledged what he did to them.

“You are no longer human.” He snaps.

“Ezra’s whore was just a sacrifice that was necessary to kill him.” He snaps. I jump up, rage fueling me.

“Don’t call her that!” I shout. Ezra steps back, and when I look around the ground around me has been killed. He takes a deep breath.

“Look, Iris. I know she meant a lot to you, but she would have chosen him over you any day of the week. As for him being a friend? You’re forgetting that he is a menace. He killed and took whatever he wanted. Just because he was nice to you doesn’t make him a friend.” He says. I shake my head.

I don’t care what he says. Ezra was kind to me. Especially when he saw I needed it. He took care of me when Remus lost his memory, and even in the new world, he would offer comfort. He was a good person.

“I want to leave.” I say. I look up at Braith, finding my nerve. He laughs softly.

“And go where? Remus destroyed your planet and his adopted planet. And his people would never welcome you in as one of us. Especially after you killed their king.” He asks. I shake my head.

“Earth. I don’t care. I just want to go.” I snap. He narrows his gaze, but I don’t wait for a response. I turn away from him, beginning to leave.

Suddenly, crippling pain rips through me and my legs give out. It feels like my body is being electrocuted. And it stops. I look up and see Braith coming towards me. He has a grim expression on his face.

“Leave?” He laughs.

“You’re not leaving. After everything, I did for you? No.” He snaps.

“I can see why Remus was so hard on you. It seems that kindness isn’t something you respond well to. You’re too headstrong for that. You need discipline.” He snaps. He holds his hand up, and my body lifts with it.

I gasp in pain.

“I need that energy I put in you, to further my people and bring us back. And that energy is the only thing keeping you alive since you so graciously killed Remus.” He snaps.

“I am not letting you walk away from this.”

~

I scream even louder as I bang on the cage. The fucking cage.

“Let me out!” I scream. I drop to my knees. My energy has been drained. The bars must have the same properties of those energy cuffs Remus was so fond of using with his family. I hold my temples as the drumming in my ears grows louder. I want to leave. I want to go somewhere. A sob escapes me as realization dawns on me.

I want Remus.

I’m old enough now to where I don’t remember much of my childhood. And what I do recall of life, was spent in that wasteland where survival was a constant threat looming over me. My first few months with Remus were hell for sure, but he changed so much when we left.

Even though I hate his ideals, and I hated how cruel he could be, I hated myself even more because I was falling for him and never wanted to admit it. But now that I am all alone and scared, I miss him.

I miss his smile. His touch. His constant promise of protection. His adoration. I miss those damn purple eyes. I drop my head between my legs letting the tears come.

“I’m sorry.” I whisper. He’s gone forever. By my hand. I killed him. I took away my own happiness. I’ve been too stubborn to see it, but now that I have this massive amount of energy rushing through me, I understand what it is that Remus felt. Why would he be bound by the laws of humanity?

He’s far from it. There would be no reason to be.

I want him back. I want him back with me.

I sit up, laying my head against the cage, closing my eyes and slowing my breathing. The headache is growing and I can’t take it for much longer. I try and listen to my heartbeat, using it as a beacon to calm me down, but I keep hearing an overlapping beat.

It’s abnormal.

Is that how my heartbeat sounds now that I have energy? I really focus on it and think back to how Remus’ sounds. It sounds nothing like that.

My eyes fly open. The drumming. The drumming that I’ve been hearing. It’s a heartbeat. A small one. Faint even. I look down placing my hands over my stomach as shock washes over me. I close my eyes, using the energy inside of me to feel.

My eyes fly open as realization sets in.

I’m pregnant.