Deadly Vows - Chapter 47 (Patreon)

Elise

People tell you the pain is excruciating when you give birth. But even then, they don’t describe it enough. They don’t warn you enough.

I feel as though my body is being torn in half, like I will split open at any minute. The past few days have been rough for me. Luca fucking drugged me when he left, so when I woke up, he was gone.

I was in full-blown panic mode until Matteo took charge and calmed me down. We sat by the phone each day, waiting for Luca’s call, but we never got it. And finally, two weeks later, while we were just sitting at the table, eating, my water broke. Matteo was calm and collected and had a plan. Arranged by Luca, no doubt. We left the bunker and went to the hospital, where my doctor was waiting.

I have been in labor for about nine hours now, and each contraction gets worse and worse. I squeeze my eyes shut in pain as another contraction rocks my body. I need someone here. I need Luca. But he is nowhere to be found. He should be here with me, ensuring that everything goes well. The nurse walks in, and I turn my gaze to her.

“We’re going to check your dilation since your contractions are so close together.” She smiles at me. It is a sweet smile.

Matteo is sitting in the corner of the room, and he looks as though he is going to be sick. But I have to give it to him; he is doing great being here for me.

The nurse places her hands between my legs, and her eyes widen. “Honey, this baby is ready to come out now,” she states.

I can’t respond, as another contraction quakes my entire body and I scream in pain. I told them I didn’t want anything to numb the pain. The last thing I want in my system is a drug. I’ve had enough.

The doctor and a few more nurses swarm in the room. They are all talking to me and telling me to calm down, but I can’t listen to them. The pain is too much. I feel a hand close on mine and look up to see my brother. My baby brother is standing over me, holding my hand. Even though he looks like he is going to be sick, he gives me a confident squeeze and a smile of reassurance. He stands back only next to me. I can’t focus on anything other than the pain.

The doctors are all speaking at once, and Matteo is also.

“You can do this, Elise. You’re strong.” His voice is calm and steady even though he looks like he is going to pass out at any second.

I don’t know how long has passed. Seconds. Minutes. Hours. But eventually, I hear it. The sweet cry of my baby boy. The doctor is smiling at me now, handing him to me.

Tears well up in my eyes and spill over as I cry. He is so tiny, so soft, and pink. His cry is so small. I take in his features. He is beautiful. I wish more than anything that Luca was here. I wish he were the one that was in here to witness this. To meet his son. But he isn’t.

And we have no idea where he is or what is going on.

I hold Luciano on my chest and cry. I cry along with my son.

Six Months Later

People always use strength out of context. They say it’s what pure power is. They say it’s what force is. They say it’s when people do the hardest things they can. I think it’s more than that. Hell, even I can’t give an explanation for what it truly is.

I am sitting in the backyard of the cottage. There is a large blanket out, and Luciano is sitting up, smiling at me as he holds some of his blocks in his hands, swinging them around and tossing them on accident. I can’t help but smile back. He is so precious. And so loving.

He looks a little like Luca but has gotten my features, giving him a soft look. His hair is dark as night, and he has Luca’s eyes. Those gray irises that will forever haunt me in my sleep. Matteo and I are in the dark. Honestly, we have no idea what happened. But Matteo told me that before Luca left, he told him to assume the worst if he didn’t contact us within the week. And he never did.

I’ll never forget the way I felt. With just having the baby, and this revelation, I literally broke down and cried. I cried so hard, I felt as though my chest was breaking. I remember shouting at nothing in particular. He told me he would always be here. To protect me and Luciano.

I made Matteo enroll in school. Luca told us no one knows of this location or that we are here. We never got a call from Nicolai or Romelo as well, and I remember him saying they didn’t know about it either. So with the life of the Mafia behind us, Matteo needs an education. The bills for the house are automatically drafted from Luca’s account, and Luca left us four safes filled with cash and a packet of letters that he told Matteo will let me claim everything.

I don’t want to, though. I don’t want to accept that he is gone. Even in the hospital, the doctors offered to fix the scars that spell out Luca’s name, but I refused. I didn’t want him to be angry with me when he got back. And when we realized he wasn’t coming back, I still couldn’t do it. Call me sick, or twisted, but it is proof that Luca was here at one point.

I am fine during the day, but at night, when I lie in that room all alone, I cry myself to sleep, only to wake back up from nightmares. They are starting to grow a little less frequent, but they are still there, and I hate it.

I look at my watch, at the time. Matteo should be home in about three hours. I lay my head back and bask in the sunlight. It is a beautiful day today. Luciano laughs, and I open my eyes to find him drooling on one of his toys.

I smile and stand to grab him from the blanket, carrying him onto the back patio and placing him in an enclosed fence so that he can’t go anywhere. I open the glass sliding door and step inside the kitchen to grab some water. That is when I hear Luciano laughing like crazy. I freeze when I hear a deep voice.

“I’m here now. I will protect you, mi figlio.”

I turn around, and the glass I am holding slips out of my hands, shattering on the floor.

There is a man with his back to me holding Luciano. Luciano is smiling at him with all the adoration in the world. My heart hammers in my chest, and my palms grow sweaty. My mouth immediately dries. Tears blur my vision as the man turns around, and I am met with a familiar set of steel eyes.

Luca. He glares me down, taking in my body like a man would a glass of water in the desert. He walks inside the kitchen, placing Luciano in his crib, which I keep in here. He’s here. He’s alive. He’s fucking alive. His hair is shorter, and there is a scar above his eyebrow leading to the top of his cheek. It’s faint, but I can see it. But he is here. He is alive, and he is breathing.

He stalks closer to me and places his hands firmly around my face. I reach out and place my fingers on his, making sure he really is here.

I choke on the sob breaking through my lips. We don’t speak; we just stay like that, taking in each other’s forms. He dips his head and captures my lips between his. I wrap my arms around his neck and squeeze my legs around his waist with everything I have in me. He is here. He is fucking here.

He carries me to the kitchen table, and I can feel the cooling flat surface against my back. Luca’s hands run up and down my body, and moans of pleasure leave my lips. He rips my clothes off me, and I gasp from the suddenness, then his hands are back on me. He runs them up and down my body, squeezing my breast, and I gasp as a familiar heat pools between my legs. He pauses his ministrations, and I open my eyes to see him staring at his name across my side. He lightly traces it with his fingers and meets my gaze. He softly places kisses down each letter, and sparks of excitement travel down my body. I don’t have time to register anything else.

His lips are back on mine, and his fingers are between my legs. He gives a groan of approval to find me wet and inviting. I don’t even remember when, but his clothes are off, and I can feel his hard cock prodding at my soft entrance. I moan as he runs his thick head over my folds and finally pushes in me maddeningly slowly. I moan out loud as he stretches me with his heated length.

I gaze up at him, taking in his features. Features that I thought I would never see again. His eyes are filled with lust and adoration as he takes in mine as well. Once he is fully sheathed, he leans down, pressing soft kisses on my forehead, my cheeks, my eyes, my nose, and finally, my lips. He begins to move slowly inside of me. Then he thrusts hard, causing pleasurable sensations to spiral up my body. I cry out in pleasure, and Luca’s lips are on mine as he swallows my moans.

His hands slide slowly up my body until he stretches my arms over my head and clasps my hand in his. His other hand snakes down my thigh, and he brings it up so that it is latched around his waist, and he penetrates me even deeper. I feel a cool breeze on my cheeks and realize that I am crying. I feel Luca’s thumb wiping my tears.

“I’m so sorry, baby.”

I can see the sorrow and regret filling his steel-gray irises. Before I can say anything, my climax comes out of nowhere, my inner muscles clamping down on his thick length as he plunges in and out of me. His thrusts become more urgent, and he stiffens above me. I can feel his cock pulsing inside of me as he finds his release. He collapses on top of me but doesn’t pull out. He picks me off the table, and we slide down on the floor.

As I catch my breathing, I place my ear on his chest and close my eyes. His heart is beating strong underneath me. I remember his words.

“As long as it’s beating, I will protect you.”

I can feel him kissing the top of my head.

“I fucked up. You were mine to protect, and I fucked up. I’m so sorry. I’m sorry I left you alone. I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you.”

I look up at him, placing my hand on his face once again. I reach up and run my finger over the scar. “I thought you were dead,”

I whisper. “I thought … you died.”

He grabs my palm and kisses it. “I almost did.”

More tears fall down my face. “What happened?” I whisper. “Everything had been taken care of. All that was left was for me and Romelo to fill out our duties. The bastard was a coward. He had rigged his whole house to blow. And he did it with me in it. The force of the explosion almost killed me, propelling me into the wall that fell and crushed me. I had a cracked skull and multiple broken bones.”

That must be the reason his hair is shorter now.

“Lucky for me, Nicolai’s cleanup didn’t last as long as we’d anticipated, and after checking to see if Romelo needed backup, he showed up just in time to find me in the rubble. I’ve been in a medically induced coma up until a few weeks ago.”

My breathing hitches. Luca almost died. He really was almost gone from me, forever. I roll over so that my naked body is straddling his hips. His eyes visibly darken as he watches me. I grab ahold of his face in mine and kiss him. Really kiss him.

* * * * *

I stand in my bedroom, getting dressed. Luca said he would watch Luciano while I clean myself up. I am about to walk back in the room when I pause in the archway. Luca is standing with his back to me, holding Luciano in his arms.

“I almost missed you. I almost didn’t get to watch you grow up. I almost messed up my promise to protect you.” He leans down and kisses Luciano on his forehead. “I love you. No matter what, I will be a better father than mine ever was to me. There will be times when you hate me, and I’m okay with that, as long as you know how much I love you, mi figlio. I love you so much.”

Luca turns around and gives me a small smile, holding one arm out for me to come to him. I immediately walk into his embrace, and we stand like that in the middle of the living room, Luca holding our son in one arm, and me in the other. The two parts that make up his world.

“I love you,” he says with all the tenderness and care in the world as he looks at me.

“I love you too,” I say. And I mean it. With every fiber of my being, I mean it.

We don’t have that tender, timid, lovey-dovey kind of love. Our love is a compulsion. A need. A dark and twisted obsession between us that no one can understand but us. I know someone from the outside looking in will think we are crazy, but they aren’t the one married to Luca Pasquino, capo dei capi of the North Mafia. I am.