The Ice Queen - Ch. 17 "Where the fault lies" (Patreon)

Neytiri

Breakfast is tense.

The conversation between Cassian and me only last night feels like a distant memory as we sit across from each other, the silence stretching on. He’s completely different closing himself off from me but this time, I know why. Especially now that Caius has voiced his concerns.

“So, what were the two of you discussing?”

Cassian finally looks up from his phone, eyeing me curiously as he fights for self-control. I consider lying to him. His expression every time Cassian is in the vicinity is one of someone who still feels fresh pain from the betrayal. But the more I consider it, the more I think of our night together. He was patient and more receptive than I initially thought he’d be.

I force myself to keep eye contact with him as I respond.

“Caius expressed how worried he is for you.”

Cassian scoffs lightly taking a sip of his drink.

“Ironic, isn’t it?”

“How so?” I ask earning his full-on glare.

“His concern has now shifted to the man he willingly betrayed.”

“Cassian, you know Caius cares for you. You even told me how close the two of you were before-”

“Did he put you up to this?”

I blink in shock at his tone. The longer I study him, the more I see his temper threatening to break the surface. I slowly shake my head, reaching for him.

“No, we-

“That traitor has only one interest in mine. Your safety and your people. He has no interest in what happens to me. He has no right to insert himself or his false emotions when he caused so much pain among his own. Especially when he blindsided me.”

My lack of response adds to the heavy tension in the air. Guilt begins to creep its way into my gut as I look at Cassian. Especially after hearing not only what happened to his people but his family. He lost everything. And the only reason he has a sliver of it back is that I survived. Otherwise, Caius would have remained in the mountains with Cassian’s men, never to return to their leader.

“I’m sorry.”

The words are out of my mouth just as a stray tear slips down my cheek. Cassian’s anger immediately dissipates, replaced with shock. More tears slip down my cheeks as I think of everything Cassian told me last night; his firsthand experience of a massacre at the hands of my brothers. Having to watch not only his parents but hold his little sister in her last moments. I’ve been angry and hateful toward him, thinking I was the victim in all of this, and rightfully so at the time.

But I see the truth now as Cassian sits across from me; the unbearable pain and suffering that clings to his existence. Cassian’s crown was stained with the blood of his family when he was forced into it.

“Your family didn’t deserve what happened to them. It was my people that started all of this, but no one knows that. No one knows my brothers broke the treaty. My brothers led the massacre against your family. And even now, we continue to take from you. I’m the reason you’re so alone, Cassian. I’m sorry.”

I drop my head in my hands as overwhelming sadness washes over me. I recognize some of it as my own, but as my power grows, so has my understanding of the blood oath between us. And I recognize some of these emotions as Cassian’s.

I feel his presence next to me, placing his hands around me in comfort.

“Neytiri-”

“It’s my fault you took this path. We took everything from you,” I whisper.

Cassian doesn’t speak. Only my sobs can be heard when I suddenly feel a gentle touch against my fingers, pulling them away from my face. I look up to see Cassian watching me with a sad expression.

He smiles gently, tucking a curl behind my ear as he speaks.

“Thank you.”

My eyes widen slightly as he leans above me, placing a soft kiss against my forehead. He lingers, before pressing his forehead against mine, gently cupping my face as he speaks.

“Is that you in my head?” he asks softly before pulling away. He studies me intensely using his thumb to wipe away my tears.

“How can you continue to want to be with me, Cassian? I represent everything that ruined your life.”

“The answer to your question lies in our past. What do you think drove my revenge? What do you think made me follow through even when I began to develop feelings for you? That was the past, and you atoned for your people all the way to our last battle. But this moment right now is our chance to fix things. We met each other so many times throughout our lives. It’s clear we can no longer outrun the fate that has been woven into the thread of our lives.”

He continues to study me as Caius steps into the room and the moment between us is gone.

“Your flight is ready.”

Cassian holds my gaze as he stands, responding to Caius.

“Okay.”

Once Caius leaves the room, Cassian stands holding his hand out to me. His hand is warm as I place my hand in his, allowing him to help me from my seat. He keeps me in his grip, his thumb rubbing over the top of my knuckles as he speaks.

“I will be on the mainland for the week. I have business.”

He releases my hand, walking to the archway.

“You’re just going to leave me alone?” I ask in disbelief.

Cassian pauses in the doorway.

“No. Caius will be here.”

A stretch of silence passes between us. I wrap my arms around my waist, watching Cassian carefully as I speak.

“I want to go home. I want to go back to Brineau.”

“Walk me out.”

I silently follow Cassian through the villa until we reach the front where the car is waiting in the driveway. Cassian turns to face me, his deep gaze eyeing me heavily.

“I’m proud of how far you’ve come since being here. I know it can be difficult adjusting to a place opposite of you. For now, I need you to remain here. When I come back we can discuss returning to Brineau.”

* * * * *

The outdoor silence of Brineau compared to the outdoor silence of this island are starkly different. On Brineau, only the wind bristling through the trees can be heard when standing outdoors. But on this island, the sound of waves and birds is constant.

When coming here I was nervous about being alone with Cassian. The weight in my chest feels lighter now. We are facing our past head-on. Though it is ugly, it is necessary for us to come together and lead our people.

My gaze shifts to my legs. They’re partially submerged in the pool, the cool water soothing as I sit on the edge. The emotions that Cassian feels nag at my mind. He’s in so much pain yet he pushes it aside for the sake of atoning. As I think back to our conversations, I wonder if Cassian has ever mourned the loss of his family. It seems like he went straight into getting his revenge and once he saw the consequences of that jumped into atoning for it. But the pain he feels in his heart is unbearable. I don’t know how he can smile living with that sorrow.

“Can I join you?”

Caius is walking toward me with a soft smile and I motion to the empty space next to me. He takes a seat, dipping his legs into the pool, and tilting his face towards the sun. Comforting silence fills the air as he sits next to me. His presence is familiar. There’s no fear when it comes to Caius.

I close my eyes resting my head against his shoulder.

“We hurt him, Caius.”

“I know.”

“I’ve learned to better control my power. I was able to feel him through the blood oath. He’s suffering.”

Caius shifts, and I open my eyes to see him looking at me.

“You can feel him?”

I slowly nod.

“He’s in a lot of pain. I know I have a lot to be angry for, but none of this began with Cassian. It all began with me.”

I study Caius heavily.

“Why would you choose me over him? Especially after what you witnessed?”

“At the time I chose to leave, Cassian was overcome by his grief. He was on a rampage that was hurting the innocent.”

“But I am not innocent. My blood murdered his.”

Caius shakes his head.

“Neytiri when you came to us, you didn’t even know who or what you were. To take revenge on you at the time was cruel. And wiping the Ikniri out the way he did brought imbalance to the world. We all play a part in this life. We cannot exist without the other. This has always been the way of the Ancients.”

I smile softly at his words. Maybe that is the fate that has been handed to Cassian and me. The war between our people spanned long before the attack of mine. The Ancients were split and hostile. Maybe Cassian and my marriage was something that would unite the people and start a new era. Maybe we were to put an end to the hate.

There’s still so much pain between our tribes, Caius and Cassian are prime examples of the bitter feelings that have spanned centuries. It took me so long to even awaken, now must be the time. We can no longer fight fate, we must embrace it.

I inhale softly not wanting to mentally stress myself, especially since Caius’s legs are in the water next to me, so I think of something more pleasant to speak about.

“Tell me about my people. How have they been all this time?”

* * * * *

New York, United States

“I have a visual on Mr. Varus.”

Cassian Varus is known to the world as an eccentric man. He’s always kept to himself on that private island, continuing to wow the world with his contributions. But this new case is something entirely different.

I watch from the car as he exits his own, making his way into his building. He’s wearing a coat, covering his expensive suit with sunglasses to cover his terrifying eyes. The Varus’s are a mystery to the world, but for generations, when a son comes into ownership of the company, they are known to color the whites of their eyes and cover their bodies with strange tattoos. It’s always been a mystery to me why the world accepts such strange cultural traditions, but I guess money can buy you anything; including respect.

If our spies' research is accurate, Cassian Varus is harboring a creature with unimaginable energy. The research alone is off the charts. This new creature must be the key to all of his technology. It must also be the reason he is pushing into clean energy. He’s found a source that can’t be depleted.

I scoff aloud.

That kind of power should not belong to one man. Not if we have anything to say about it. It should belong to the people. It should belong to a country, not one person who can distribute it as he pleases. That creature will soon be the property of the United States. Or whichever country gets to it first. We’re now on a time crunch as information is being leaked around the world.

My gaze shifts to the screen displaying the flight path of his private jet.

He left Brineau shortly after the incident with the doctors, and has remained on a separate private island for the last month. They must be running more tests on the energy source there, especially since he returned to the mainland for more meetings.

The line of the radio crackles slightly pulling my attention as a voice comes back.

“Good. Tail him and keep us posted on his activity.”

“Roger. Is the team in place?”

There’s a long pause before I get a response.

“The team has been deployed to the island. If the source is there, they’ll bring it home.”

I smile, dropping the radio. They’re sending in a specialized team that has dedicated their lives to missions like these. If anyone can bring it home, it’ll be them.

“I hope you’re not too attached to your new prize, Mr. Varus. We’re coming for it.”