Author's Nightmare: Chapter 139 (Patreon)

Solitaire POV: Day 112

Current Wealth: 233 gold 47 silver 16 copper

Shango had hurried us all away for a group discussion in private. As I might have expected, he was actually considering helping the fucking moron. As you are probably expecting, I was opposed.

His argument was the precise one I would have made; one wearing the disguise of pragmatism. 

“Swanhen was a big deal once. Okay, not compared to cities, but as far as towns go? It was profitable as hell, and if we come out of this with pull there then that’ll make us profitable too.”

I bit back my annoyance.

“Except we won’t, will we?” I asked. “Because Lord Fuckwad has promised not to give us anything for our trouble, and apparently doesn’t much see the value of human life.”

Shango considered pointing out how little I valued it, too, but decided not to as he replied. 

“You know that isn’t right, showing up as the big damn heroes will win us popularity. It might get us more recruits, it will get us more noble support, and the more our reputation spreads the more unpopular anyone who plans on attacking us will become. We’re not strong enough, yet, that we can afford to ignore a set of armour like that.”

Well, that was Shango for you. He knew me well enough to guess which points I’d find heaviest, and he had the brains to hit every single one with a single verbal barrage. Still, Mamma Solitaire didn’t raise her no quitter. I’d started this argument, and if I had to keep shitting myself until I won then so be it.

I’ll spare you the slow, painful crawl towards the inevitable. I did not win. Shango did his best not to look too smug after I finally conceded- as if I couldn’t smell it on him anyway- and Beam looked rather relieved. He always gave away his standing on a topic by the reaction he had at its end. 

Still, our concurrence here just meant we were ready for another topic. The more important one, too, I would say. 

“And how sure are we that Appleberry will become our bezzie mate after this?” I challenged.

That had Shango pausing. 

“I don’t know.” He said at last. “But if nothing else there’s a lot more to gain than just that.”

“And we can trust him.” Beam cut in, sounding uncharacteristically certain. “I’m used to his types, we can rely on him to respond in kind if we help him out.”

“Right.” I grunted. “I forgot, that’s what the upper class is famous for. Rewarding people fairly for their labour.”

Bema smiled, but he remained intense. 

“Trust me.” He answered. It took all my concentration not to spit at the very concept, but I considered things and realised that we already looked to be doing this anyway.

“I trust you.” I lied, and felt a stab of guilt at how Beam’s face lit up. Well what are friends for if not comforting each other with happy untruths and kind deceptions?

“The land is in a pretty good position too.” Shango added. “A fair distance from Elswick, but close enough to reach easily. It can make a decent retreat for us if we need it to.”

“You’ve convinced me already.”I grunted, and felt another spasm of irritation. I’d be saving lives, okay, sure. But did Appleberry’s really need to be among them? Putting aside the fact that he cared about feeling cool more than saving people, his name was fucking Apple berry. And he ruled Swan hen. Ugh. Looked like Redacle’s habit of “filling in the gaps” with our world-building was making no distinction between naming schemes we used as teenagers vs ones we used now. I was almost embarrassed. 

“It’s a big town.” I noted at last. “Good few thousand people live there, if the orcs are threatening it in spite of that we’re gonna need a lot more than just us.”

Both of them looked soured at that, but the truth tended to have such effects.

“We have fourteen new recruits.” Shango reminded me, turning to Beam. “How are they going?”

He thought for a moment.

“Helena is a good teacher, and they seem to be…Inspired to move along quicker…”

That’d be my idea to have him present and helping, I’d hoped that his reputation would add a certain weight to their training and apparently I’d turned out to be right. 

“-But it’ll take a while before they’re proper fighters even with that.”

“How long is a while?” Shango pressed.

“...Weeks, at least.” Beam sighed. “It takes time to teach people how to fight.”

“Especially real fights.” I added. “Most people just freak out and either get in the way of those, or contribute nothing.”

Shango didn’t look happy, but he took it all in quick enough. He’d always been good at accepting inconvenient truths. 

“What do we do then?” He frowned. 

“Well, obviously we need to take the time to actually finish up our miniature army.” I noted. “And while we do that, I’ll see what other weapons I can prepare. If we give it two weeks then that should be a decent half-job, right?” My question was addressed to Beam, who gave it a fair amount of thought.

“With a lot of training every day, yes. At least they’ll be good enough to meaningfully help on a consistent basis.”

“Then that just leaves us to outfit them, we’ve started that already so it shouldn’t take much longer.”

“What are you giving them?” Shango asked. “Plate armour?”

“Fuck no.” Beam and I said at once, I let him explain.

“Remember how long we took to move in that? We had superhuman strength that made it feel almost weightless, and even now, weeks later, we still get caught on door frames and shit. No, that’s a non-starter. Especially with how long Ardin takes to make it.”

Shango was looking half annoyed and half thoughtful, like he always did in those rare conversations which happened past his expertise.

“Then what will we give them?”

“Brigandines.” I explained. He eyed me blankly, so I elaborated. “Basically second-hand steel plates bolted together and pinched between layers of leather. Think Sean Bean in Game of Thrones. Not as good as plate, not as consistent, but a lot quicker and easier, lighter and, fortunately for us, something we already have a head start on from all the damage and replacements our full plate armour took during the tourney.”

Hearing that they would, in fact, be wearing plate armour seemed to do wonders for Shango’s optimism at least, and he relaxed.

“Alright then. So we’ll prepare in…The ways we have been I guess, I’ll see about balancing the funds while we pay for our new recruits, perhaps getting more before we arrive. You two just keep doing what you’ve been doing.”

I resisted the urge to giggle at that, having gotten over the annoying part of my new project, and graduated to putting on its finishing touches. It was nice and mobile too. A horrible little surprise for whatever was waiting for us at Swanhen. Shango and Beam seemed to notice my enthusiasm, taking short steps away from me as it became more evident. 

Honestly, some people were so puritanical.