Author's Nightmare: Chapter 142 (Patreon)

Beam POV: Day 123

Current Wealth: 255 gold 42 silver 33 copper

I’d seen a lot since coming to Redacle. The inside of a bear’s throat, from several feet away. Zombies. A vampire who could turn your own fears against you, a man strong enough to launch people in plate armour ten metres back per swing. And methods of death so revoltingly excessive that their victims couldn’t even be ID’d with dental records back on earth. Terrible things, scarring things. Things that, even if I made it home the next day, would stick with me for the rest of my life, right up until the moment my heart stopped. Out of them all, though.

Shango and Phelia’s flirting took the cake.

We were all crammed into a carriage, some old heirloom of the Velaharo which Shango had had repaired purely to make an entrance, despite Solitaire threatening to go into convulsions at the idea. They were seated opposite me, touching and hugging, caressing and kissing. I was doing my best not to projectile vomit over them both. 

Look, I can understand the appeal of women. I’ve spent my share of time enjoying them after all. But at a certain point, a person just needs some sense of dignity. Is there anything in the world as revolting as a man in love? I was thinking no. 

“You didn’t need to come.” Shango growled, clearly picking up on my discomfort and looking somehow affronted at it. I rolled my eyes.

“I’m not leaving you both alone, if someone tries to kill you then I want to be there to stop it.”

The only one better in a fight than me was Arthur, and at a social gathering where things like full plate armour were considered “improper attire”, my ability to conjure my own equipment on the fly might have actually given me the advantage over him. Shango clearly understood as much too, but he didn’t look any happier than I was. Good. Misery loves company. 

Besides, this was a closed affair. Family of nobles only. The only alternative was Solitaire which…No. 

We arrived after a tediously long ride, the carriage having been built for luxury and showing off rather than speed, but the journey was soon forgotten as I laid eyes upon our destination. It was a mansion almost the equal of Phelia’s, in size. But its decoration- its staff- were a different thing altogether. Filling out the grounds in a way that felt somehow surreal. I’d gotten used to big things with little human habitation in them, this was something else. And we were heading right for its maw. 

“Relax.” I heard someone say, turning and finding myself surprised to see Phelia addressing me. “This isn’t a fight, and while there will be rivals there…They should be fearful of us. We gave no warning about our coming beside the barest, polite word ahead. And we’re an unknown factor. The advantages are ours.”

Right. They didn’t know what we could do, how we’d move, where our skills lay. Thinking about it like some match let me frame it in terms that made sense of that, and made our situation seem that much less precarious. I frowned, looking back to Phelia and seeing a knowing smile on her face. She’d done that on purpose? 

She really was a good fit for Shango. 

Our carriage parked as close as it could, but the sheer size of the place meant we were soon foot-slogging our way into the building. I took point of course, doing my best to compensate for the lack of Solitaire’s natural insanity by keeping an eye out for anything that looked potentially trap-shaped. Soon enough even that instinct faded, though, as we entered the building proper, and then, after another minute or two of strolling through elongated halls displaying various trophies and artworks, the three of us came to a sprawling epicenter.

The hall was at most half full, but there had to be well over a hundred people there. It was only one third the volume of its equivalent in the Velaharo Manor, but that was no small thing. 

Everyone present was wrapped in so much finery I half expected them to topple under its weight, and a lot glanced towards us as we stepped in. I felt nothing. A lifetime before crowds had prepared me for such attentions, and by the looks of things Phelia and Shango were similarly inured. Still, I did get an awful sense for how screwed we would be if this was a trap.

Ugh, I was starting to actually think like Solitaire. If talking to yourself was the first sign of insanity, that would probably be the six hundredth. 

“I say we split up and mingle.” Shango suggested. “Let them see us as individually social. Not to mention the places a woman can go that a man can’t, and vice-versa.”

“Agreed.” Phelia nodded, watching as he peeled off from us and disappeared into the social canopy of the hall. Phelia on her part headed the other way, and I waited a few moments to tail her. If push came to shove, she was a lot less capable of defending herself for those initia, precious moments of combat than Shango. 

She headed on, slipping through groups of chatting nobles and I clumsily waddled after her. Within about thirty seconds, I almost bumped into someone. Freezing instantly and apologising quickly, I was surprised to find it was a woman, staring up at me with a smile on her face.

“Beam Belahont?” She asked, with the tone of a woman who already knew. “My, you really are tall. I’ve heard about you, you know. Is it true you single-handedly bested a vampire at Rinchester?”

“Uh, not really.” I replied, trying to peer ahead to catch sight of Phelia again. “Excuse me-”

I tried to step past her, but somehow she moved, just an inch, and I was right in front of her again. 

“You know, I’ve been fascinated by some of the stories about you. What would you say to accompanying me to my manor and regailing me about the details? I’d love to hear it all straight from the source.”

I had no idea why she’d stressed the word accompanying, and I was too distracted to care. I sidestepped again, using the full length of my stride this time to plant myself firmly from her path as I huried off. 

“That sounds lovely, but I’m afraid I’m only here as a bodyguard, not to socialise. Sorry.” She was left frowning in my wake, and I made it no more than another ten paces before some other woman ambushed me with a conversation, this time leaning in much closer. Close enough that I could actually feel her breath on my face as she spoke. 

“Hello there.” She breathed. “I don’t think I’ve seen you before, what would your name be again?” It took even longer to disentangle myself from this one, and by the time I did, more seemed to be slowly closing in, waiting for their chance to approach. I reached Phelia only after wading my way through a solid dozen other women, each one more uncomfortably forward and presumptuous than the last. It was a relief to finally be in the company of my sister in-law.

So much of a relief, in fact, that I momentarily forgot I was meant to shadow her in the relative luxury of having her there to stave off other people’s attentions. 

“Enjoying yourself?” She asked, taking the sort of amusement I’d expect from Solitaire in my plight.

“They’re all over me.” I snapped. “Like, like rats, practically crawling over each other to get at me.”

Phelia grinned, eyes dancing with good-natured mockery.

“Oh, but can you blame them? You’re Beam the Breaker, legendary Hero. Saviour of Rinchester, vanquisher of Vampire Elders, rival to the King of Blades himself-”

“Enough.” I cut in, finding myself suddenly harsher and more severe than I’d intended. Phelia paused, taking a moment to eye me, then nodded.

“Sorry brother.” She said at last, inspiring a spasm of guilt to replace my annoyance. 

“What have you done now?” A new voice came, I turned to find Shango approaching with one of his least false-looking grins plastered across his features. “Saw the two of you were huddling again, so I thought I’d complete the set. Anything important going on?”

“Your brother has been experiencing the horrors of heroism.” Phelia told him, and Shango cracked a smile at the fading irritation on my face. 

“Well at least we’ve all been getting our names out across the room.” He shrugged. “I’ve been finding some very productive talks myself, Elswick really was holding its best business back on us.” He seemed mildly peeved at that, but I could tell the emotion was blunted by finding so many new opportunities unrolling before him.

I was starting to hate these periods. Long, mundane stretches of peace and calm. They always made me feel so…Useless.

“I’ve made other connections.” Phelia noted. “Less overtly useful perhaps, but the women of this city’s nobility are rather eager to win my friendship all of a sudden.” She glanced at me, knowingly, and then back to Shango. “Give me a few weeks and I may have quite the source of information and rumour.”

Shango was smiling wide at that, and a shudder ran down my spine. He was absolutely smitten, I realised. Tragic. Before either of us could say anything though, a new figure approached. He was tall, thin but powerfully built and looked like he stood on the wrong side of fifty. He spoke without introducing himself or mincing words, and I found myself suddenly wary of him. It might have been ridiculous in another world, but old men could be dangerously powerful in this one. Even without their influence and wealth. 

“The Belahonts.” He smiled, eyes flitting over each of us. “Lord Viras, a pleasure. I’ve been meaning to meet you for quite some time, but…Hm, the third brother, Solitaire, he is not here?”

“Busy.” Shango replied, matching the man’s smile. Both of them seemed as false as the other. Like watching a pair of cats stare each other down. 

“A pity.” The newcomer sighed. “I’d been hoping to meet that one too. Well, no matter. Tell me Shango Belahont, would you mind if we had a word? Just the two of us. I have certain things I’d rather like to discuss with you.”

“Of course.” Shango replied, still matching the man beat for beat. It was like watching him speak to an aged reflection. Well, aged and whitened. “Lead the way.”

“I’m coming.” I cut in, finding myself suddenly on edge about…Everything. Viras, whatever he wanted Shango alone for, and, once again, the fact that we were deep in enemy territory with nothing but each other as company.

“No.” Shango cut in, not even looking at me. “Stay by Phelia, please.”

I paused, and by the time I’d even thought of a suitable response they were already gone. 

Phelia and I stood side by side for a good few long, painful seconds before she finally broke the silence by speaking. 

“You’re staring at them both like a hawk.”

“Am I?” I replied, without thinking. Yes, I realised, I was. They were only a few dozen paces away, close enough that, these days, I could probably sprint over in under two seconds. Still, I was on edge. 

“You really care about them, don’t you?”

It took me a moment to realise she meant my brothers, not Shango and Viras specifically. I risked a glance back at her, uncertain suddenly.

“They’re…” My friends? Co Writers? “My brothers.” I said, realising it was the best word for it. Phelia smiled.

“And yet you’re different from them, aren’t you? Shango is the spider at the centre of a web, Solitaire a snake waiting to strike. But you. You’re like a hero come to life, as if you walked out of some old folk tale and into reality.”

I didn’t know what to say to that, but fortunately she wasn’t finished.

“I love you for protecting us, Beam. And I would ask that you keep doing it. However I ended up here, you are my family now. The Belahonts. And I would see you preserved.”

Even Solitaire? I wondered, sceptical at the thought. Phelia smiled again.

“Yes, even Solitaire.”

Great, another mind reader in my company. Just what I fucking needed.