Swordtember Day 6: ENTANGLED (Patreon)

A silly one for this prompt :3c featuring real life accounts of what’s in my bag

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The Red Eye of the Cosmos, of galactic prophecy and some stuff that got caught on it when it was in my bag but you can ignore that stuff ⭐️💀

A distant echo of thunder rolls over the Infinite Plains. There, in the distance, a speck of blue light stares you down. The so called “hero”, or at least that’s what the feeble Uprising call him. You spit on the ground, and watch as the saliva sizzles to steam on the hot rock below. Do they not know that under your watchful eye, the galaxy will flourish? That this Uprising sows nothing but chaos and contempt through your perfect, unified kingdom. The speck of blue grows closer as you see the bright blade illuminated in the dust storm. They only listen to one language - that of combat, of burnt flesh, cauterised muscle, and clashing sabers.

Wait, you did remember your saber right?? You put your hand to your belt and feel your heart skip a beat as you notice it’s absence at its sheathe. You do a little emergency pat down of your outfit before you remember how you spilt that sauce on the sheathe - the sticky red one - and that it’s back at home drying from the wash. That means… The saber, you sense its presence. It’s in your little tote bag, aaah, okay. You reach in and feel many things in the bag, your phone, water bottle. Okay where is it. There’s so many old receipts and bus tickets in here why don’t you just throw them away. No way there’s a rice crispies square in here, how did you forget about that. That’s a little mid afternoon pick me up is what that is. This is such a small bag how could you lose an entire energy saber there’s only so m- there it is! 

You pull it up and grimace. It’s all tangled in your headphones and - oh my god no it’s your embarrassing pink hair bobble with the knock off plastic sanrio charm. Your keys are caught up in the whole thing too, the key ring is snagged on the wires of the saber, oh my god this sucks. This sucks absolute ass. You're about to duel for the fate of the galaxy and, yeah, these headphones are really stuck on there huh. You’re gonna have to unknot them before you can even begin to untangle the rest of this. There’s no time, you’re just gonna have to own it. This is your vibe now. You feel your face flush hot red as the hero begins his monologue, while side eyeing your bedazzled blade. You shift your stance, ready to strike, and take solace in the fact that least nobody will be left to tell this story.