One Does Not Simply Hike Into Mordor (Bonus Episode, with Matt Ufford) (Patreon)

Matt Ufford joins us for an emergency Frot. The emergency in this case being such a colossally bad idea we had to break it down like Jon Gruden grinding tape. I CALL THIS GUY THE DUMBASS.

Basically, a guy worked out that the trip the Hobbits take to Mordor is roughly the distance between his home in Wichita and Mt. Whitney in California. He maps out a route through terrain we all agree to describe as “inhospitable”. Matt lends his expertise in the desolate beauty of the American Southwest, which he takes a car to see like a normal person.

We also discuss the next domino in the saga of Mark Robinson’s increasingly alarming horniness. Look, we’re all horny around here, but his commitment to being incredibly horny (and allegedly posting about it in the Nude Africa forums) raises some serious questions about his ability to do whatever Lieutenant Governors do that doesn’t involve jacking off.

We also discuss a French teacher at some school that costs an obscene amount of money per year sharing her opinions about hijabs, and the fallout that ensued. Quelle horreur!

Find Matt on Twitter and check out the kickass video and audio work he’s overseeing at Yahoo Sports. 

If you’d like more bonus #frotent, send us ideas at frotcast@gmail.com